The Prophet's Child: The Story of Renesmee Cullen
by Amanda Beth
Summary: Renesmee Cullen is finally learning about life, love, destiny, and when the ancient Volturi prophecy is affirmed, the fate of her entire family... Sequel to Life After Forks. Takes place 6 years after Breaking Dawn.
1. My Daughter: Prologue

**Prologue – My Daughter**

Once upon a time I gave birth to the most gorgeous child I'd ever seen. I remember seeing her moments before I went unconscious, moments before I was injected with the venom that would give me this life. A life that now leaves my daughter a perpetual eighteen year old, just like me. She is now a good three inches taller than me, a height she obviously got from her father, along with her long bronze hair. I only find myself in her brown eyes, the eyes of my own past, a past that has become more distant as my immortal life grows longer.

But my story has been told for now, this is about Renesmee.

About her future.

About our fate.

**An Introduction from AB**

Who is the hardest character in Twilight to write for? That's easy, the one we barely know. The one that is not stereotypical of anything. I had to make up my own Renesmee.

Yes, she is intelligent and yes, she looks eighteen, but the fact that she has been alive for only 7 years makes her naive sometimes to life in general. She could be considered demanding and spoiled but growing up as the only child in a family of nine, ten if you count Jacob, that was bound to happen. She is also beautiful and that has gotten her many places in life.

I must make up the dynamics between her and her parents who now look like her siblings. I need to figure out how exactly her and Jacob will move to the next step. Fanfics for the Cullen family are easy until this point because of the detailed personalities Stephenie Meyer gave us. This is a shot in the dark. We were only given a first look into the life of Renesmee Carlie Cullen. Fans of Twilight have no attachment to this character at all and I'm hoping to change people's opinions on Nessie fanfics. I WILL be doing versions of some chapters by her and then I'll post the same one in Edward or Bella's POV so you still get the taste of them. We can't leave them out completely!

I hope everyone will give this a chance. It may be slow in the beginning, especially this chapter, but I really need to make sure to introduce not only Renesmee, but the changes that have taken place within the Cullen household. Please visit the page on my livejournal with the details (including a picture of my image of Renesmee). I'll mention it in the author's note at the beginning of chapters when it gets updated: xamandabethx(dot)livejournal(dot)


	2. Nightmares & Dreams: Renesmee

**Characters are © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N**: Everyone please remember that this isn't going to be the most stimulating chapter... I really need to introduce Nessie, the new family dynamics, and what they've been up to since Edward and Bella's 2nd wedding. Oh and PLEASE don't think this is a Nessie/Jacob story! It is the story of Renesmee so yes, Jacob is obviously a large part of it, but he was a large part of the saga too!

I really would appreciate any and all input on the characters as I build the story!

**Chapter 1 - Nightmares and Dreams**

_It wasn't the clearing in Forks I was standing in, or the one in Elkins. It was somewhere far off that I didn't recognize. I saw in the distance the grey and black cloaks of the Volturi, with Jane's small stature standing out more prominently from the dark cloud that was moving closer. I felt it begin to choke me, cutting off my ability to breath, to think, to run. My mother wasn't there. I had no protection and I knew they wanted me. They've always wanted me. My frozen legs begin working slowly, and finally I was running through the unfamiliar woods. I didn't know where I was going; everything looked the same. I could feel the dark cloud taking over the forest, and my vitals again being taken from me. Then suddenly, he was there. The large russet wolf jumped out of the darkness and there I was with Jacob under me. He was carrying me through the obstacles that stood in the way. _I have you Nay, I won't let you go. I promise, you are safe with me, _he told me without speaking. A light flashed, blinding me for a moment, and there I was in Forks. Jacob was gone. I knew where I was but without him there I was lost. I saw my family, my mom's arms open wide to take me in, but at the same time I couldn't name them, I couldn't think of anyone but Jake. I felt my knees give out, and I fell to the ground crying for him. I begged to be swallowed up by the black cloud, but my mom's shield was now blocking it from moving any farther. My heart was breaking. I could feel my chest being ripped open. A piece of me was gone and without it I could not live..._

It was dark in my room. I could hear Carlisle in his study, and Esme was somewhere in the house humming softly. Rosalie and Emmett were in the garage and my mom was in her studio - her new hobby of painting took up a lot of her night. I slowly pulled out farther from my dreamlike state and became very aware of my racing heart as it fell to my feet. I had been having dreams about losing him more often since moving to Oregon. My desire to be with him became more of a need - a desperate need - than just a want. Being away from him, even at night while I slept, actually hurt. I wondered if this meant my feelings for him were changing even though I couldn't wrap my mind around being anything but best friends. We had been best friends, he said, from the day I was born. He said that it was our destiny and I have always believed him.

I couldn't manage to will myself out of bed. It was only a dream... well really, nightmare was a better description for it. But was it? It had been three years since Alice had first seen the Volturi make the ultimate decision to end the Cullen legacy once and for all, and although the visions since then had been vague or nonexistent, these reoccurring nightmares made me wonder if I was really looking into a part of my future...

"Renesmee?" My dad knocked softly on my door. "Are you all right?"

_Damn mind reader._

"Excuse me?"

"Sorry." I sat up rubbing the sleep from my eyes. It was still dark out and the red glowing digits of my clock read out a quarter after three.

"I just heard you thinking..." He was still standing in the doorway, leaning up against the frame trying to keep his cool. I knew he heard me think about these things a lot, but he never told my mom. She wouldn't be able to handle it, no matter how strong she is. Dad on the other hand, was an expert on keeping people's thoughts to himself.

I swung my legs over the bed and got up. There was no use trying to go back to sleep anymore, being as wide awake as I was. "There isn't anything you can do about it, Dad. I know I can't be the only one thinking about it."

"You're right, but you are my daughter and it's different for me and your mother to see you worried and scared."

I didn't how to respond to his comments anymore. Ever since we moved he had become much more serious and strict. The only time I ever saw him smile was when he was with my mom and then there wasn't anything that could wipe it off of his face. It was embarrassing sometimes, especially at school, to see my parents look at each other like lovestruck teenagers. Well, technically they _were _lovestruck teenagers, and technically no one knew they were my parents. The story here in Astoria was that of the typical adopted Cullen clan, but this time I was my dad's sister. I slipped up quite a bit the first few months calling them Mom and Dad, but if any of the student body overheard me, they didn't say or think anything of it. I had to start calling them by their names even at home just to get use to it.

"I'm going to get something to eat," I mumbled. Being around Jacob so often made me more open to human food, which I found myself snacking on in between hunts.

"Shouldn't you get some more sleep? You have to survive the whole school day still." The fatherly concern coming from his seventeen year old mouth was always very comforting to me, though I wasn't sure why.

"No use, I'm up." I managed to smile up at him in an attempt to convince him that I really was of sound mind.

Now that I was awake, he went to his piano and sat down to play. I stood in the hallway listening to him begin a song I hadn't heard before. Even his music had become darker lately, but I wasn't sure if anyone else noticed besides me.

The kitchen would be considered overstocked when you take into account that I was the only one in the family who ate human food besides Jacob, who was always raiding our refrigerator. Esme had lost interest in her previous pastime of photography and decided to take up cooking. Jake and I were her only test subjects of course, and in the beginning it was difficult to swallow some of the more complex meals she made. I suppose when you haven't tasted food for almost a century, mixing it together to make something edible was a challenge. I couldn't possibly tell Esme anything negative; no one could, so instead I hinted to my mom who gave her some pointers in the kitchen. It was safe to say that all of her creations were now works of culinary art.

"Oh you're awake!" As if on cue, my personal chef, came fluttering into the room like a little bird. "I wasn't expecting you up yet! I haven't made anything!"

"It's okay, Esme. I just need a snack," I insisted. I took the cellophane off of the plate of brownies that had been baked yesterday and grabbed two.

"Dessert this early?" My mom, her face and clothes streaked with colors of paint, was peering around the archway of the kitchen.

I shrugged stuffing the brownie into my mouth. "Will it make you feel better if I hunt this weekend? Jacob mentioned going to California."

"Not quite my point, Renesmee." She wiped the back of her hand across her forehead leaving yet another streak of paint on her translucent skin. "And we'll go hunting with you."

I didn't know why I was suddenly followed everywhere if the Volturi were not even close to making a decision. It was as if they no longer trusted Jacob to be able to protect me if something happened. They were only mountain lions after all. I had been hunting since I was a month old.

My dad showed up in the doorway and chuckled, hearing my mental rant, turning up only one side of his face in a crooked grin. He looked amusingly at my mom and then raised his eyebrows at my choice of meal.

"They _are _only mountain lions," I said with a childish pouted. "I'm going to go see my bike." I left them in the house, hearing my dad explain to my mom my mountain lion comment. She said something in reply but her voice dropped so low that there was no way I could make it out. _Secrets, hmph._

When I got to the garage I saw that Emmett and Rosalie had most of their things in the moving truck they were taking to Portland. They had lived within the family for longer than they normally had before their fated return to Forks and my mother's entrance into their lives, so they carefully broke the news to the family weeks ago that they were going to live on their own for a little while. I know Grandma Esme's heart was broken, but the tension that had followed us from West Virginia to Oregon had begun to take a toll on Rosalie's patience with the family. She had even refused to enroll in school this year with the rest of us.

"When do you leave?" I asked Emmett sadly. I would really miss him. He had always been truly like a big brother to me - and of course I mean a _big _brother.

"In a few hours I guess." We all knew that it wasn't his idea to move, but he would do anything to make Rosalie happy.

Something had happened before we moved that ruined any future relationship I could have with her. Jake didn't tattle on her on purpose - he still forgets sometimes that I can read his thoughts through touching him, a skill I didn't recognize until I was four. We were all hunting and he offered me a ride. Rosalie had been making snide comments all day and he started thinking about old memories of my mom's pregnancy. I had overheard enough throughout the last seven years to know that Rosalie had truly hated my mom, and they only bonded because my mom became pregnant with me. The memories Jake had were of talking to my dad... how Jake believed that Rosalie only protected my mom because she was hoping she'd die...and how a part of my dad believed it too. She would die and Rosalie would finally have the child she wanted.

I had been a high commodity since birth.

If my dad had ever heard me think about it, he never said anything. What could he say? Deny it?

I lovingly stroked my brand new BMW motorcycle. One month and I would be allowed to ride her, when my human persona would turn 16. I ran my fingers along the custom paint job Jacob had done on it; a big russet wolf stretched out in mid-stride, the details so precise it looked like he really was running against the wind. I didn't want a car, never had. The biggest positive of being indestructible to any human mishaps was that this was one thing my family couldn't be overprotective about. Not to mention the fact that I was a damn good rider. The only argument I ever heard was how I'd be stuck quite often in the rain laden climate of northern Oregon. My rebuttal? We had twice as many cars at our house than people. I think I could find a spare if necessary.

I straddled the bike watching the sunrise through the reflection of the house windows making the forest that surrounded us look like an extension of this world. Our home here looked similar to the one in West Virginia, only the entire front wall, shaped in a three dimensional triangle, was covered in windows; huge windows. I played with the gears on my bike; the thoughts of what I'll actually be able to do with my own transportation began to enter my mind.

"In your dreams." I hadn't seen my dad standing at the garage door, and I knew he had heard everything.

I sneered at him. "You have no good reason to make me a prisoner once I can drive."

"Take that up with the warden," he said and winked. If my mom could have her way, she would have kept me a little girl for the rest of my eternal life.

"Yes, she probably would have." He was laughing at me now.

"Edward! So annoying!" I froze. "Sorry! Sorry!" He didn't like when I called him by his first name outside of school. I think it made him feel as though he was my equal.

"We leave for school in an hour," he muttered and walked back inside.

Ugh, school.

I had no room to complain-yet. This was my mom's third time through school, but my dad had graduated more times than he could count. When Alice saw what I have since dubbed The Decision, we moved just over a year later and no one got to go to college as planned. I was the youngest out of the Cullen family according to the good people of Astoria. It had been a heated discussion among the family when I was finally able to blend in without having unusual growth spurts. In _my _opinion, just because I was the youngest when you counted years, didn't mean I should be counted as the youngest in school. I could easily have passed as my dad's twin if they let me. But, after a long, drawn out argument, and Alice promising me I would lose in the end, I entered Astoria High School last year as a freshman, my parents and Alice as sophomores, and Jasper as a junior.

"Let's go Renesmee!" In letting my mind wander I hadn't realized how late it had gotten and it took Alice's high pitched voice rang from the house to shock me back into routine. It only took me moments to dash upstairs and get ready, but Alice was still waiting in the living room impatiently, tapping her foot.

Before piling into my dad's Audi we all said our goodbyes to Rosalie and Emmett. I feigned my best "I'm going to miss you!" to Rosalie, although I saw my dad's eyes shift. _Caught_. Emmett embraced me in a huge hug and told me good luck fending off all of my possible suitors. I felt the color rise in my cheeks and he broke out into a barrel laugh. He teased me endlessly now that I was the only family member with the ability to blush.

"I'm going to miss you, Squirt." I hated the nickname he picked out for me, but the more I made that clear, the more he used it.

Tearless sobs were coming from Esme as she hugged her children goodbye. "We're only going to be in Portland, Mom. That's practically just a jog around the corner!" Emmett promised, not really exaggerating when you calculate the speed in which we could run.

I was quickly over the unnecessarily long goodbye and let myself into the Audi waiting for the rest of the family.

_"All she thinks about with the bike is going to see Jacob whenever she wants," _I heard my dad whispering to my mom. Eavesdropping wasn't something you could get away with when you consider my dad's ability and all of the heightened sense we had. But it seemed as though I had actually done the impossible.

_"I'm not sure what you want me to do about that. It hasn't turned into anything yet."_ My mom was rubbing his back. _"You would know if it had..."_

Feeling uncomfortable with the implications of the conversation I leaned over and obnoxiously honked the horn. They both jumped – and vampires don't spook easily.

The only person who spoke the entire way to school was Alice, who rambled on about how she had _finally _been asked to plan winter formal.

"They said I had a _budget_!" she said the word in pure horror. "But don't worry, I told them Carlisle would _gladly_ support school spirit!"

"Why would we worry?" my mom finally asked.

Alice huffed a laugh. "Bella, please! If you think you aren't coming to the dance then you don't know me very well." Before my mom could even object, I tuned out the banter for the rest of the ride to school.

Astoria High School was ugly. The bricks were a hideous shade of orange instead of the classic rich burgundy of the old historical buildings and homes around town. It was just one large, ugly, brick building.

I could name every student enrolled in the school, all eight hundred and fifty four of them. If you gave me long enough I could probably point out their cars too.

"I have a planning meeting!" Alice was already skipping off, waving goodbye to us. No one had ever been involved in school activities, but Jasper told me Alice needed to get her mind off of her job within the family as the watchdog. I couldn't imagine having to constantly flip through the future watching for our possible deaths, and even worse, having to tell us.

"Nessie?" My dad raised his eyebrows at me as we walked through the parking lot.

"Yes, Edward?" I didn't have to use his name, but he was snooping around in my head again and it was my immature way to get back at him.

I immediately felt guilty for purposely taking a jab at him when I looked at his face and saw the worry in his eyes. I immediately slowed my steps to keep in pace with him, my mom on his other side holding his hand tightly.

Eventually I had to split off and go to my sophomore homeroom, but before I did my dad kissed my forehead. "It'll be okay," he whispered.

I nodded and sighed, looking toward my classroom door and Grace Conahan standing against the closest locker, waiting for me as she did everyday. Her modelesque figure and signature wavy blonde hair was the envy of most girls in the school, along with her varsity cheerleading status (sophomores rarely got to be on Varsity, supposedly). My dad told me that she was drawn to me for the sole reason that I was popular with the boys, but her intentions were innocent. My diluted vampire genes made people less adverse to me, unlike the rest of my family. I even sat with Grace and our friends at lunch. It was hard enough to be around my parents all of the time and lunch was a way to socialize separately.

"I wish my brother and I had a relationship like you have with Edward. He's like the best big brother ever, huh?" Grace followed me into the room. She had a tendency to saunter when she walked and I was pretty sure she did it on purpose for even more attention. I always found it amusing.

"Good morning, ladies." Marcus Collins leaned over from behind us, his huge smile and perfect dimples had a way of making me blush, but just hearing his name - Marcus, the name of one of the Volturi ancients - make me shiver. Grace was crazy about him but refused to show any interest. She explained to me in exasperation one day that _he _had to pursue _her_. "So, how was your weekend?"

Grace immediately began to ramble on about every detail of the previous two days, throwing a little too much enthusiasm into the conversation. So much for being discrete about her interest.

"And yours Renesmee?"

"Nothing much," I said and shrugged. I hoped my mom was shielding my dad from Marcus' mind. He did not like Marcus' mental pictures at all, which Marcus had since the first day of freshman year. I almost switched schools to ease Edward's discomfort.

School continued, monotonous as always; I had learned most of the material while I was home school in West Virginia. By lunchtime I was exhausted from the lack of sleep.

"You all right, Nessie?" Grace asked pulling a chair up next to mine.

"Bad night's sleep. Edward warned me I was going to crash sometime today. Right as always." I saw from across the room my dad smile secretly at me.

I nodded off twice in Chemistry, Marcus having to elbow me before Mrs. Finch noticed. He stopped me before the last bell rang.

"Hey, Renesmee!" I turned and waited for him. "Do you - Well, it's days away but we were thinking about catching a movie Friday night. What do you think?"

"Uh, sure. Cool. Let me know Friday what time."

Marcus watched me walk towards the parking lot, and when I looked over my shoulder he was grinning from ear to ear.

"You have a date?" Alice asked as soon as I slid into the car, but it was really more of an announcement.

I rolled my eyes. "It's not a date. It's a group thing."

"Uh huh."

I ignored whatever future she had seen and nodded off before we even got out of the parking lot. The uneven dirt road that lead to our secluded house, jolted me awake and it took me a second to regain my thoughts. The first thing I noticed was Jake's royal blue motorcycle outside the garage. I jumped out of the car before my dad even had it in park.

Sitting at the kitchen counter, eating who knows what food he found, was the six foot seven inch frame of my best friend. He looked up, grinning at me and I couldn't help but grin right back.

"How was school?" he asked with a mouthful of food.

"Same old, same old." I sat down on the couch, so exhausted I was unable to drag myself the extra ten feet to the kitchen.

After finishing his food and cleaning the dishes he sat down with me and turned on the television. "Someone didn't sleep well," he looked at my half closed eyes.

"Mmhmm," I murmured.

"Renesmee? Homework?" I heard my mom from their bedroom.

"Finished it before school was even over," I told her, barely raising my voice.

I turned my attention back to Jake while he told me about his day at school. He was too old to pass for a teenager - well he _looked _too old at least - so he finally enrolled at the community college in town, still working on restoring cars as a part-time job. It was somewhere at the beginning of a _Friends_ episode when my exhaustion finally won out, and only Jake's low words made it through to my unconscious. I instinctively moved closer to him to feel his warm body closer to mine, hugging a throw pillow to fight the urge to move even closer.

A part of me heard throughout the rest of the afternoon and evening my family moving around the house quietly. The television was still on, but the volume was lower, and Jake hadn't moved away from me.

"You can go home, Jake," I heard my dad say.

"I'm fine here, Edward."

"She should be in her bed." His tone was stern.

"Fine, I'll put her to bed."

"No, I'll do it."

"Edward, calm down," Jake replied just as sternly.

I felt the couch fall out from under me, Jake's body heat against mine. Moments later I could feel the feather bed under me, and a comforter covering my body. His warm lips found my forehead and I wanted to shoot right up in bed from the shock of it, but I willed myself to stay still. "Sweet dreams," he whispered, barely audible.

I tried to stay conscious long enough to see if the conversation between him and my dad was going to continue, but dreamland began to take over and their words were making no sense.

"Is she asleep?" my dad asked, still annoyed.

"Yes," Jake replied sharply. "You knew this would happen, Edward. I don't know what you want me to tell you. At least I watch my thoughts around you, I can't help what she thinks."

I wanted to yell at them to stop the cryptic talk, but my body was farther gone than my mind.

"We'll talk about this later," my dad said. I didn't hear Jake reply, just the front door open and close.


	3. Nightmares & Dreams: Edward

**Characters are © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N**: So this is chapter 1 but from Edward's POV. Let me know if you like this format! This will _not _happen for every single chapter.

**Chapter 1 - Nightmares and Dreams**

Edward

_...if I was really looking into a part of my future?_

I walked silently down the hall and stood outside of Renesmee's room before knocking. I had seen her entire dream, then heard her depressing thoughts when she woke up. The burning in my chest was unavoidable knowing how she was feeling.

"Renesmee?" I knocked and opened the door at the same time. "Are you all right?"

_Damn mind reader, _she said to herself.

"Excuse me?" She wasn't as practiced when it came to watching her thoughts around me.

"Sorry." She sat up in bed looking at me in a daze.

"I just heard you thinking..." I leaned casually against the doorframe trying to keep a calm face.

"There isn't anything you can do about it, Dad. I know I can't be the only one thinking about it."

She was right. On any given day, I would catch at least one member of my family worrying over our future. Well, everyone but Bella of course. It wasn't difficult to know when she was thinking about it though; her face was an open book, especially when I would catch her watching Nessie sleep. It didn't matter how many times I told her that we would all be fine; when the future wasn't even decided yet, it is nearly impossible to be confident in anything.

"You're right, but you are my daughter and it's different for me and your mother to see you worried and scared."

"I'm going to get something to eat," She got out of bed and walked by me.

I glanced over at her clock. "Shouldn't you get some more sleep? You have to survive the whole school day still."

"No use, I'm up." She smiled, but it was forced, giving away everything she was feeling.

I wandered to the piano now that she was awake and fingered the black and white keys delicately. My songs weren't the same anymore, although Nessie was the only one who noticed. I couldn't write like I use to - about how perfect my life was with the most amazing wife and daughter in the world. Harsher cords came to my mind as I strung them together in sorrow.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bella emerge from her studio streaked with different color paint. She was beautiful. Always. She was mine. Forever.

"Dessert this early?" I heard her ask.

"Will it make you feel better if I hunt this weekend? Jacob mentioned going to California." Renesmee's answer was both a sass and honest question.

"Not quite my point, Renesmee. And we'll go hunting with you."

_Do they not trust Jacob to protect me? They're only mountain lions._

I walked over laughing, and my daughter knowing I had heard her rant rolled her eyes. Bella, my beautiful, amazing, wonderful wife, had shades of blue and green across her cheeks and forehead. I would take her right now if I could, but we had to be more appropriate now that Renesmee was older. My eyes then fell on the meal in question, a brownie, which Nessie was popping into her mouth.

_She is not going with him alone. _Bella didn't change her expression or move her eyes as she lowered her shield for me.

"They _are _only mountain lions," she said with a frowned. "I'm going to go see my bike." And that was all we got before she turned on her heels and out the door.

"Mountain lions?" Bella asked, cocking her head sideways.

"She thinks we don't trust Jacob to protect her." I shrugged.

"That has nothing to do with it," she lowered her voice so low that even super sensitive ears couldn't hear us. "I can't help it. I'm just waiting for it to one day click in her head. Both of their heads."

I wrapped my arms around her waist taking in her wonderful scent. "She's toying with the idea, but we've known that for years now."

Bella stood on her tiptoes to kiss me, but instead of the peck I was expecting she took my bottom lip into her mouth. "Mmmm," she said deep in her throat.

"Why Mrs. Cullen, are you seducing me?" I took her face between my hands.

"Always," she admitted with a smile.

"_Emmmmmmmmmmett_! I told you to pack those in the _bigger _boxes!" Rosalie's ranting interrupted our moment.

I was going to really miss having Emmett around, even if they would only be in Portland. Rosalie on the other hand had been making our lives a living hell. Although Esme was having a hard time letting go, it took Carlisle no time at all to find them a suitable place to live in the city within hours of them breaking the news that they wanted to move out for a while. Rosalie had our father on edge just as much as the rest of us.

"What are you possibly going to do in Portland?" Esme cried that night.

"I got a job! Night shift at a twenty-four hour gym! I can't wait to challenge those fools to a bench press contest!" Emmett cheered.

"You're going to end up breaking the bench," Alice teased. "How about you Rose?"

"Not sure," she said bluntly. _I just need out of here. _

I growled at her for.

Back in the present, I shook Rosalie and her negative thoughts out of my mind and hugged my wife who was still in my arms. "Let me go calm her down before she throws the truck across the property," I said in between kisses. "And you should probably clean up, unless you want to start a new trend at Astoria High School."

"Perhaps I will!" She smirked and walked off towards our bedroom.

_One month is way too far away! When I have a license I'll finally be able to go places without them. I'll be able to go to Jacob's without everyone keeping tabs on me the entire time. _

"In your dreams," I said, coming up behind Renesmee who was straddling her motorcycle. She had been dying to ride it since it had taken up residence in our garage.

But now she was fuming. "You have no good reason to make me a prisoner once I can drive."

"Take that up with the warden." I winked at her making a reference to Bella.

_If it were up to her, she'd have kept me a little girl forever._

"Yes, she probably would have," he was laughing at me now.

"Edward! So annoying!" she whined, and then saw my face stiffen. "Sorry! sorry!"

It wasn't her fault that she slipped and called us by our names. She had to for school and it was more important she didn't use Mom or Dad in front of people. It still irked me whenever she would say it though. "We leave for school in an hour," I mumbled looking over at Rosalie and Emmett who had sorted their problem without the need of a mediator, and walked back to the house.

When I got back to our bedroom Bella was scrounging around in the over-sized closet, her face freshly cleaned and only a towel around her. _Don't even think about it Edward, _I told myself. _School soon. Inappropriate. No. _It was obvious that our insatiable appetites for each other had not diminished one bit in the last seven years.

I wasn't sure if I should tell Bella what Renesmee had been thinking; she was so nervous about their unavoidable future relationship as is, but this was eating at me.

I laid on our bed watching Bella get ready, styling her raven hair even though it was always perfect; never a hair out of place. She saw me staring at her in the mirror's reflection.

"What?"

I huffed a laugh. "Have I told you yet today you're beautiful?"

"No, not yet." She had only half of her smile turned up and her eyes widened. That was the sign for Bella's invisible blush.

"Can everyone come say goodbye to Emmett and Rosalie please?" Esme's voice sounded hoarse. This was going to be hardest for her.

"I'm going to miss you!" Renesmee threw her arms dramatically around Rosalie's neck. _Can't believe you wanted my mom dead. _She knew she was caught the minute she saw me approach. She found out about Rosalie's unkind intentions when it came to Bella's pregnancy, but she never had the guts to ask me about it. It was something I could _never _repeat to the family. Ever.

"We're only going to Portland, Mom. That's practically a job around the corner!" Emmett had Esme in his big arms.

The goodbyes were drawn out; Esme was purposely trying to keep her family together for as long as she could. It wasn't until my brother and sister were in the truck did I noticed Renesmee was nowhere to be seen.

"Alice, where is Nessie?"

"Hmm, in the house I think," she shrugged, waving the truck off.

I couldn't keep it in any longer and pulled Bella aside. "I need to talk to you."

"What's wrong?"

"When I came out here earlier, Nessie was off in her own world thinking about getting her license."

"And?"

"All she thinks about with the bike is going to see Jacob whenever she wants."

"I'm not sure you want me to do about that. It hasn't turned into anything yet," she had reached for my back and rubbed it soothingly. "You would know if it had..."

The car horn in the garage honked and I saw Renesmee's brown eyes looking at us.

_Did she hear? _Bella asked.

She knew by my silent reply that she had.

For the sake of my sanity, Bella shielded Renesmee's thoughts from me during the ride to school. Alice wasn't a bother, her thoughts only about the winter formal she was put in charge of. I had not broken the news to Bella that Alice had already purchased her dress and that she would be attending as well.

"They said I had a _budget! _But don't worry, I told them Carlisle would gladly support school spirit!" Images of silver and blue tulle hanging from the small gymnasium were dancing in her head. Jasper was silent, as usual, doing me a favor and calming me down.

Bella was only partially right before. If anything had started between Renesmee and Jacob I _probably _would have heard something - from Nessie. My main concern was that Jacob had perfected the act of watching his thoughts around me. It was impressive, really, when you consider the fact I'd lived with the rest of the family for decades and they still hadn't mastered his skill. I only heard from Jake what he wanted me to hear... most of the time. When he was angry, especially with me, he slipped up more than usual.

"Why would we worry?" My attention fell back to the conversation between the sisters.

"Bella, please! If you think you aren't coming to the dance then you don't know me very well."

_She already has a dress for me, doesn't she? _Bella narrowed her eyes but didn't look at me. A smile escaped from my lips.

"What does it look like, Alice?"

"Edward! Did you tell her about the dress?"

"Of course not." I looked at her in the rear view mirror. "You give too much away, that's all. You do know that the dance is three months away, right?"

She ignored my sass and leaned between the front seats. "Bella it's _beautiful! _You'll see! It's slate blue and satin and fitted and you'll look _amazing _in it! It wasn't even expensive! Off the rack I swear!"

"Whatever, Alice." She glared at me when I started to snicker. "What's so funny? Break out your tux, you're going to suffer with me."

Hmm, hadn't considered that. "Alice, maybe..."

"I'll win in the end, Edward. Give it up."

"So little. So annoying."

"Hmph!" Alice crossed her arms and leaned into Jasper who put his arm around her.

_You can't at least _try _to amuse her? _Jasper thought.

I sighed in response. It really wasn't worth the argument. Alice had been having a tough enough time as is constantly waiting for another sign from Italy.

"I have a planning meeting!" Alice was out the car door as soon as I pulled into the parking lot.

_I couldn't imagine having to constantly flip through the future watching for our possible deaths, and even worse, having to tell us. _Nessie stood at the door of the car watching Alice merrily dash off, the frown across her face was painfully obvious.

"Nessie?" The burning in my chest returned.

"Yes, Edward?" S_nooping around in my head again._

My heart ached at her words and when she saw my expression, she frowned and slowed down until she was next to me and Bella.

I leaned down and kissed my ice cold lips to her hot forehead. "It'll be okay," I choked. She sighed and Bella squeezed my hand as we parted for our homerooms.

_"I wish my brother and I had a relationship like you have with Edward. He's like the best big brother ever, huh?"_ I heard Renesmee's friend Grace say as they disappeared into the classroom.

_"Ladies," _said a cool voice.The second my grip tightened on Bella she put up her shield leaving us to our safe bubble. Marcus Collins was the bane of my existence in Astoria, a replacement of the infamous Derrick Harris that I happily got to leave back in West Virginia. From day one he was interested in Renesmee. The only reason he was still standing was because his thoughts were not at all crass or rude when compared to Derrick's perverted mind. He was just a typical teenage boy with hormones. I almost felt badly for Marcus in a way, knowing that he was going to be sorely disappointed the moment Renesmee realized her feelings for Jake.

Jasper looked over before disappearing into his senior homeroom, feeling my tension. He sent a wave of calm my way. I nodded in appreciation.

I didn't have nearly enough classes with Bella this year. My family found it hilarious that I finally found an office administrator that I couldn't sweet talk, or as Bella puts it, _dazzle. _Bitter Mrs. Tolle never had a nice thing to say or think about me. It was quite frustrating. It also meant I couldn't be in Bella's shield and had to concentrate _not _to spy on my daughter and wife.

Bella met me outside of my class and we walked over to lunch together. Renesmee was already sitting with her friends. I hadn't been open to the idea at first, but I quickly learned last year that if she didn't have other friends, we might have all disowned each other. Parents and kids are normally -make that _never -_ in this situation.

"Nessie looks exhausted," Bella frowned. "I wish she had gotten more sleep. Did she tell you what was wrong?"

"No," I lied.

_"Bad night's sleep. Edward warned me I was going to crash sometime today. Right as always." _ I looked over at my daughter who was searching for me. She knew how to both drive me crazy and wrap me around her finger within minutes.

"Emmett made lunch so much more fun," Alice pouted.

My brother definitely was the comic relief of our family and unless we wanted to begin pulling topics of conversation out of a hat, there wasn't much to talk about. It had never been this difficult before when Rosalie and Emmett had live on their own, but then again, life was much more simpler before Isabella Swan moved to Forks.

I didn't even realize I was looking over at her.

"Edward? What?" She was stabbing her uneaten food with a fork.

"Just thinking about you. About the beginning."

She gave me a nostalgic smile. "We had more to talk about, that's for sure."

Thankfully my last two classes were with Bella, so I could spend my entire afternoon wrapped up in her. That was something that would never get old.

"Mr. Cullen?" Mr. Doyle had asked a question that for the first time, I hadn't heard.

"Yes'sir?"

"Do you have an answer for me, Mr. Cullen? Or should I move you away from Ms. Swan?"

_James Madison, _Bella thought.

"James Madison, Mr. Doyle." I wanted to choke him for saying Swan, but that's what was decided on when we moved here.

_I really need to separate those two. _

I whispered thank you in Bella's ear, blowing a little too much air through her hair and she shuttered.

_You're going to be in trouble later, _she warned.

At the end of the day Alice and Jasper were already at the car by the time Bella and I got there. Alice was looking especially smug.

"Yes, Alice?"

"You don't get first dibs on everything going on in the future, ya know." _Allons enfants de la Patrie, le jour de gloire est arrivé!_

"Really Alice?" I growled. She was singing the French national anthem. "Get in the car please."

It was another minute before Renesmee finally graced us with her presence and Alice finally stopped singing.

"You have a date?" Alice blurted out. That's what she had scene.

"It's not a date, it's a group thing." I looked in the rear view mirror but Nessie was avoiding my eyes.

"Uh huh." Alice bounced a little in her seat. _No one else is going to end up going. It's a date! She has a date Edward!_

My first reaction was an overprotective anger, but then I realized it was more of an irritation that I couldn't put my finger on. I couldn't question Nessie about it because she had passed out on Alice's shoulder almost immediately.

The rest of the ride was quiet, until I heard an exasperated sigh from Bella as I pulled into the driveway. Jake's distinctive motorcycle was parked outside of the house and before I even noticed, Renesmee was out of the car and inside.

Renesmee, still tired, had slumped onto the couch, leaning back and resting her head, giving Jake short answers to his typical questions. I only nodded to him, not sure what would come out of my mouth if I opened it, and led Bella into our room.

"I'm going to go prematurely grey," I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Very funny. Anything reactions from either of them?"

I shook my head pulling my sweater over my head. "She's too tired and he's too good at watching his thoughts."

I turned around to see Bella's hungry eyes on me. "Come here, please." So I did.

My mind was on my wife as I walked across the room, but like it was forced upon me, Jake let his guard down for just long enough.

My attention turned and I growled. "Jake."

"Edward!" Bella stamped her foot. "Are you serious?"

"They're laying on the couch together. I'm sorry, love. I'm sorry."

"Renesmee? Homework?" She called out to the living room to see if she could change the situation.

"Finished it before school was even over," she replied flatly.

"Edward, I can't force them to..."

I was being irrational, unreasonable and- a father. "Bubble?" I asked.

Bella grinned putting up her shield. I didn't deserve such a quick apology but she had already backed me up onto the bed.

Whether I liked it or not, Renesmee slept on the couch for the rest of the day, Jake never leaving her side. I avoided them at all costs. When Carlisle returned home from the hospital I forced him to tell me all about the new free clinic he was opening at the hospital. The funds came from a very generous anonymous donor. When Carlisle told me that, he winked. There was no better man than my father.

"Is there something troubling you, son?" He was asking, but he was too perceptive not to know whom I was avoiding.

"I'm just going to have to get use to it, that's all."

My patience held out until eight o'clock when I finally willed myself into the living room. They were sitting close together, but not touching. Jake was staring at her, not noticing me in the room.

_So beautiful._

I thought my hair caught on fire the anger rose up so quickly. "You can go home, Jake." I kept my composure as well as I could. He jumped at the sound of my voice but remained calm.

"I'm fine here, Edward."

"She should be in her bed." My so-called composure was quickly deteriorating.

"Fine, I'll put her to bed."

"No, I'll do it."

"Edward, calm down." Jake hadn't used that tone of voice with me in a very long time. Without giving me a second chance he picked Nessie up from the couch. Her arms naturally reacted and reached around his neck.

I thought I might as well be hyperventilating, unable to pull myself out of Jake's thoughts. Bella was at my side before I could do anything rash.

"He's kissing her! Well, on the forehead. But still!" I knew Bella couldn't hold me back if I really wanted to strangle him.

_"Sweet dreams," _he brushed hair out of her face.

My breathing was rapid when he came back to the living room. "Is she asleep?"

"Yes," Jake sneered. "You knew this would happen, Edward. I don't know what you want me to tell you. At least I watch my thoughts around you for the most part, I can't help what she thinks." And y_ou know I love her. _

"We'll talk about this later," Bella said, separating us. Of course, she also hadn't been privy to the last sentence.

"There isn't anything to talk about, but whatever you say."

Bella was gripping me harder when she felt me lean towards the door Jake was walking towards. I stayed tense until the sound of his motorcycle had been swallowed up by the traffic of the freeway.

"He's right, you know." I sat down pulling Bella onto my lap.

"About?"

"He loves her."


	4. Instincts: Renesmee

**All characters are © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N: **Still feeling out the characters. I write other sections as I think of them and things keep coming to mind for the future of the story, so I jump back and forth. **One note:** The caption of this story is _"Her birth uncovered a prophecy with only one resolve." _ Yes, that is correct grammar- resolve can be used as a noun and Stephenie herself uses it.

I hope you guys like long chapters- these seem to be getting twice as long as LAF's. They take longer to write because it really is difficult to write for Renesmee. She wasn't built as a character in the saga.

And don't freak out when you read! Or at least read the other POV first and then freak out! Or just trust me on all of it and don't freak out at all!

**Pictures of Jake and Nessie's bikes are posted: xamandabethx(dot)livejournal(dot)com/2756(dot)html**

Chapter 2 - Instincts

It took a minute after stretching for me to piece together yesterday afternoon, knowing the last thing I remember was watching television with Jake in the living room. The longer I thought about it, the more I began to wonder if the conversation between my dad and Jake was a figment of my utter exhaustion, or whether or not the kiss on the forehead was just a part of my dreams. The spot he kissed tingled when I thought of it. _It had to be real._ My heart fluttered and my cheeks flamed up; a delayed embarrassment. It really didn't mean anything even if it did happen. Jake and my mom used to hang out all the time like we do now and Jake's just that kind type of guy who does sweet things like kiss his best friend on the forehead. _ I could ask Mom about it. I should do that._

I finally managed to drag myself out of bed and into an always busy house. I missed a lot when I slept. In the dining room, Alice had swatches of fabrics and sketches of the school gym decked out in decorations all over Esme's beloved table. I was pretty sure the administration would nix half of her ideas.

"Alice, I really don't think crystal chandeliers are covered by the school insurance." I was flipping through the dozens of papers, each one showing the gymnasium from a different angle. "Wait, what is this?" I held up a drawing of snow falling from the ceiling. "Is this... is this _snow_?"

"It won't be _real _snow, Nessie. Don't have a cow."

"I'm not having a cow or any other farm animal," I snapped. "How are you ever going to get this approved?"

"Oh it's going to be approve." She grinned tapping her head. "It's going to be so beautiful. Oh and your dress! It's going to be perfect! Marcus will _die _when he sees you in it!"

"Um, Marcus?" My cheeks flamed.

"Sure! He's going to ask you and you'll say yes! Well, you _should _say yes. I don't know yet until you make your decision."

"Stay out of my future, please," I grumbled.

Alice shook her head. "No can do. I'm on look out, remember? Twenty four hours a day, seven days a week!"

"Fantastic." I rolled my eyes and laid down on the couch. "Can you see me now or something?"

"Mmm, I have learned to see in the absence of you. You don't make everything disappear like Jacob does, so I need to put together the things that I'm seeing and figure out where you fit in them. It's complicated, but I'm getting much better."

I turned my head into the pillow and could still catch Jake's faint scent from the night before - I suddenly missed him terribly. _But what does it mean? _

"Good morning, sleepyhead." My dad ruffled my hair behind me. "I believe you slept for about fifteen hours."

"Sleep is good." I nodded again inhaling what was left of Jake.

"Hmph." My dad's attitude changed immediately, and he walked off.

School was school, even with my dad avoiding me like the plague and my mom giving me sideways glances. Classes were easy, the teachers boring, and at lunch Marcus followed me around with Grace close at our heels.

I remembered Alice mentioning in the car yesterday how I had a "date", and wondered if Marcus was only _telling_ me that it was a group event. "So what time is the movie on Friday? What are we seeing?" I asked purposely in front of Grace.

"Huh? What movie?" Grace cocked her head looking at him. Her lack of attention made her bump into the person standing in front of her and created a domino affect all the way up the cafeteria line until poor Max Hughes, the quintessential "nerd" of the sophomore class, dumped his tray of food, including an open carton of milk, all over the lap of Ms. Carney.

"You stupid boy!" The woman was what one would expect from a cafeteria employee. Her short grayed permed hair was always covered in a netted cap and a permanent scowl sat on her wrinkled face.

Little Max blubbered an apology, grabbing napkins and trying to sop up the mess, as the rest of the line staring back at a completely unaware Grace. She hadn't even bothered to look at the traffic accident she had caused and was still waiting for an answer from Marcus.

"Oh, uh, err," Marcus fumbled. "We're going to go to the movies on Friday."

"Oh great! I've wanted to see that Brad Pitt film!" Leave it to Grace to invite herself.

Marcus didn't put up a fight while the spillage to get cleaned up and another employee to take the place of Ms. Carney behind the register. I waited in line for way too long, I didn't really want in the first place. I wasn't really in the mood for human food - the mountain lions California this weekend would satisfy me. I laughed out loud knowing that my friends had no idea how I _really _liked my meat.

After an extensive time in line, we paid for our food and sat down at our normal table, already populated with our friends including the supposed invitees of the movie.

"Are you guys going to the movie too?" Grace bubbled.

Marcus' best friends, Ethan and Brandon, looked at each other. From their shifty eye movements I guessed that they were in on the whole thing along with Ethan's girlfriend, Allison, who bit her lip and looked down at her hands.

"Not sure. I kinda may need to go see my - grandma." Ethan stuttered through his blatant lie.

I looked across the cafeteria to my dad who wasn't looking over at me but was laughing and shaking his head. There must be an interesting internal conversation going on among my tablemates.

"Well, maybe we should reschedule?" Brandon offered looking over at Marcus, who was nodding in thankful agreement.

Grace looked disappointed but accepted their excuses, turning her attention back to Marcus whose attention was solely on me. I couldn't say I didn't _like _it. I wasn't like my mother in that way. Alice said she _never _wanted to be the center of attention. Perhaps I liked it because I had been the center of attention since the moment I was born.

"Are you not hungry?" Marcus pointed down at my uneaten plate of food.

"No, not really," I shrugged. The slice of pizza looked like a greasy mess on my plate and completely unappetizing. "Want it?"

"No, no," he was honestly concerned and I found it very sweet. "Just wanted to make sure you were feeling all right."

I smiled at his chivalry. "I'm okay, Marcus, thank you."

I wasn't sure what had changed this week, but I was actually enjoying Marcus' company. We paired up in Chemistry, I'm sure part of his reason was because I knew all of the answers. Everyone wanted to be partnered with me.

We took eye droppers, putting different chemicals into small trays and had to guess which solution was which by their reactions. I could tell them all by smell alone, but I couldn't make it seem that easy. Mrs. Finch was already wary about how much I knew, so there was no need to make her even more suspicious.

"So, I know the movie was postponed..." Marcus had a glass slide between his fingers, the opposite points making dimples in his fragile human skin. "I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out with me. Just me. On Friday."

I felt flushed. A date. "Sure. That sounds good." I wondered how crushed Grace would be when she found out that we had made a date in lieu of the movie.

"Ah!" The glass slide Marcus had been playing with snapped between his fingers, the sharp edges cutting through his skin. Immediately the strong, lusting scent of pure human blood filled my nose and raced down my throat burning it as it went.

I gasped loudly, covering my mouth with my hand. The entire class was looking in our direction now and Mrs. Finch rushed over with a towel for Marcus' hand.

"It's okay, Nessie, just a cut. It's not even that deep."

He thought I was disgusted by the blood. He thought I covered my mouth because I was being squeamish girl. _This will never work. _I couldn't get into the same situation my parents had gotten themselves into. It was obvious that their connection was something rare and special, something I always envied, but what if I really started to like Marcus? I wasn't like Audrey, my best friend and another hybrid vampire. She had more human traits that made it easier for her to blend in. Her blood lust was practically nonexistent. Of course I had a perfect record, minus the donor blood I drank when I was little, but it didn't mean the cravings were any easier on me.

_How in the world did Dad manage to _kiss _that? _I was breathing through my mouth, but my throat still was burning. I wish this had happened on Monday after I had gone hunting over the weekend.

"Does blood make you faint?" He was sucking his finger trying to get the bleeding to slow down. All I wanted while watching him, was to be the one tasting his blood.

I had to get out of here. "Yeah. I don't really feel well..."

"Mrs. Finch?" Marcus walked across the room and began whispering to the teacher. Little did he know I could hear him. "I think Renesmee is sick. She didn't eat lunch and now I think the blood was making her lightheaded."

"Ms. Cullen, why don't you go to the nurse and get a pass to go home."

Nurse Patty gave me a pass to go home. "Would you like me to call Edward out of class to drive you home?"

"No, I have another ride, thank you." I jumped up off the faux-leather cot with my cell phone already in my hand.

The phone rang several times as I quickly walked out of the building. "Nay? You okay?" Hearing his voice gave me butterflies.

"Long story, but I'm leaving school early. Can you pick me up?"

I could hear him smiling on the other end. "See you in five!"

I sat on the curb of the parking lot breathing in the clear air, trying to get rid of the residual smell of Marcus' blood. I didn't want to wait until Saturday to go hunt, especially since I was going out with him on Friday, so California was surely going to be canceled now. My parents would be pleased about that. Black bear would have to suffice.

I heard the roar of the engine before he was within eyesight. He was showing off by skidding the bike to a stop only inches from where I sat. I didn't even flinch.

"You're no fun!" Jake pulled his helmet off of his head and shook his hair out. He had cut it short in the spring but had been letting it get longer again. "You're supposed to get all spooked like normal girls."

"Normal girls don't have to leave class because their lab partner cuts their finger open," I sighed. "I need to go hunt. Now."

"What about your family?" He handed me my helmet. Yes, I was indestructible, but Oregon state law required helmets. There was no argument there.

"I would be shocked if my dad didn't know what had happened." I sounded muffled under the helmet. I wrapped my arms around Jake's waist breathing in the safe scent of his werewolf blood. It was repulsive to most vampires, but he smelled great to me.

"Hey Nessie!" I flipped the visor open to see Marcus on the curb. "You're going home?" He was looking at Jake- they had never met before.

"Uh yeah, I didn't want to bother Edward so my friend Jake picked me up."

"Oh." He kicked at a piece of broken concrete. "I just wanted to see how you were doing. Hope you feel better."

"Thanks Marcus, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah. Cool. I'm really looking forward to Friday," he added, his eyes on Jake when he said it.

I flipped the visor back down to hide from the awkwardness and just waved him off.

"Friday?" Jake asked rather coldly.

"Um, we're going out Friday."

Marcus was now standing by the glass door leading inside, leaning on it half open watching us still. Jake revved the engine harder than he needed too and I could see through the visor that he was glaring in the boy's direction.

"Stop being an over-protective big brother," I said in his ear, talking loud enough over the engine. His body tensed up, and without acknowledging me, he sped off.

The ride back to the house was too short. I had been enjoying not only the soft green scenery, but also the ability to rest my head on Jacob's back for an extended period of time. The wind whipping through my open visor and the groan of the engine made it possible for me to be in close proximity of him and not get nervous or embarrassed... even though I had no reason to be either.

"Thanks for the ride." I took off my helmet and clipped it to the back of the bike. Jake started to also dismount. "What are you doing?"

"Aren't you going hunting?"

"Well, yeah, but I'm not going far. You don't need to come. I know it's not your favorite."

"What if I _want _to come? Go get changed, I'll meet you out here."

I decided it would be nice to have company, so I didn't argue. I waved to Esme who was walking out to her garden. The last of the summer flowers had bloomed and she was preparing the yard for a Northest winter.

"I'm going hunting with Jake. Tell Bella and Edward?" I called down. Using their names was becoming easier for me, but still strange when I heard them leave my tongue.

"Sure, honey. So I guess no dinner tonight?" She smiled up.

"Not tonight! Thank you!"

I changed from my school clothes to clothes that a normal person would wear to a gym. This was as close to any workout I would get. Some people lift weights, but I wrestle bears.

It only took me a minute to change and get back to the porch, just in time to see my huge copper wolf slink out from behind the woods. When he stood next to me our shoulders were practically at an even height. I ran my fingers through his coat; one of the best feelings in the world.

_Where do you want to go? _he asked, my hand transmitting our thoughts between us. I flashed him a mental picture of an area not too far away where we had found a large population of bear a few weeks ago. Without any warning, Jake slid underneath me.

We had a good twenty miles to go, and at full speed we could have been there in minutes, but I think Jake knew I was enjoying myself, and he slowly to a smooth and easy run. I did love to run, but being a passenger had its pluses too.

_Jake, humans over to the west, quick, go to your right! _Their smell was more distinctive now to me than it normally would be, with my thirst being heightened since the incident that afternoon. Jake's massive body veered towards the southeast.

Far enough away from civilization, I hopped off of Jake's back and let my senses take over. Running on pure instinct was probably the most freeing experience I could think of. It didn't take long before I found two black bears leaning over the edge of a river, swatting fish from the water and onto the shoal. The world in front of me went red as I let the blood lust that had been building up completely take over. When they finally noticed our presence the one bear stood up on his hide legs and let loose an earth shattering growl, which was cut short when I rammed my body against his chest, the impact cutting off his air supply. The fight never had a beginning or an end, and I impatiently drank the animal dry. Still in my vampire mindset I looked around for the second bear that Jake had already killed and begun to devour. I had to keep my emotions in check, suddenly angry because I was still thirsty and wanted that bear. I ran off to find more food, leaving Jake to his own meal.

One cougar and a deer later I found Jake trotting around the woods, a very satisfied look on his wolf face. I swung up onto his back, my hand scratching his collarbone. I showed him a picture of home and he went off in the direction of Astoria.

Jake dropped me off at the front door and went into the woods where he left his clothes so he could change back. Inside Jasper was trying to teach my mom how to play chess, and Alice was once again lamenting over the planning of the winter dance.

"How was hunting?" Mom looked up from the chessboard.

"Sorry I didn't ask permission, I just really had to go."

"Don't be silly, you did the right thing. Your dad saw it all; he was very impressed."

"Bella, pay attention!" Jasper brought her focus back to the game. "If you ever want to play Edward you're going to need to concentrate!"

"Hey guys!" Jake came in behind me.

My mom only glanced up for a second and smiled, Jasper's low growling reeling her back into the game.

"She's dead set on being able to beat Edward one day," I whispered even though I knew she could hear me. "I personally don't think it'll be that difficult. My dad cheats so his skill is no where near what Jasper's is."

"I heard that!" said a voice from upstairs and we all broke out laughing.

"Good evening, Jacob," Carlisle walked out of his study.

Jake nodded. "Carlisle."

"Jacob do you need anything?" The ever-hospitable Esme was always at our guest's beckoned call.

"No, actually I'm going to head out. I didn't realize how late it was and I have an early class tomorrow."

My stomach dropped a little. I didn't want him to go. I hugged his waist, mumbling a quick thank you into his shirt. I liked how he was rubbing my back in return.

"Ahem," my dad cleared his throat, now standing on the stairs. "I appreciate you taking her home and going hunting with her Jake. Thanks." His words were kind, but I didn't think the sincerity was all there.

"Anytime." Jake grinned, ruffled my hair as he walked out. I felt a part of me getting almost detached - like it left with him when he left me. It was uncomfortable.

"Oh Renesmee, _Marcus _called your cell phone earlier." Alice smirked holding up the little silver phone I hadn't brought with me hunting.

I stomped my foot. "You can be such a busybody Alice!" I grabbed my phone from her hand and stormed off to my room.

"Not necessary Alice," I heard my dad growl.

I toyed with the idea of calling him back or possibly just waiting for school tomorrow, but my subconscious made the decision for me when my finger selected his number. It was ringing.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's Renesmee." I sat on my bed cross-legged.

"Hi! I just wanted to see how you were doing. If you were, you know, feeling all right."

"Yeah much better," I promised. _I don't even think I'd want to drink your blood right now I'm so full! _I mocked myself.

"Well, that's great. I'll see you tomorrow then?"

I was debating on keeping the conversation going, but something about it was depressing me. "Definitely."

I paced across my room for a minute not being able to put my finger on what was tearing at me. I wanted to talk to Audrey, but she lived with Benjamin and Tia, both nomadic vampires, and only had access to an e-mail she checked in town at the cyber cafes. I snuck into the study and grabbed a laptop. The living room was empty now so I sat down on the couch, turning on the television as background noise. The screen woke up from it's sleep and I noticed that my mom hadn't logged out of her account and the last e-mail she had was staring me directly in the face. It was too tempting.

_Bella,_

_I'm glad you and Edward are enjoying Europe! You'll need to give me French lessons when you come to visit. When will you be coming to visit? I haven't seen you in three years and I miss you! We really missed you at the wedding, but I know I've told you that a dozen times already. Tell Edward that Ben says hi and do me a favor and go visit the Louvre for me._

_Miss you!_

_Angela_

My mom hadn't ended up going to her best _human _friend's wedding, but it was ultimately her choice. She never explained it, so I didn't understand her reasoning. When Angela asked her to be a bridesmaid she was ecstatic to be able still hold onto at least one friendship from her old life, but something changed between then and now.

"Renesmee?" She walked in with her painting smock on. Her attention span at chess was minimal at best.

I slammed the laptop closed and looked at her like a deer in headlights. "Ssssorry, it was open. I'm sorry."

"The e-mail from Angela?"

"Y-yeah." I thought she was going to scold me for snooping, and I was prepared for it.

"I don't have any secrets, Renesmee, it's all right."

"Do you miss Angela? And Misty?" Misty Randall became a close friend of my mom's in Elkins, but we moved without leaving a trace of us behind, and she could no longer have contact with Misty.

"Of course I do, but they are from two different lifetimes. It's sad that I couldn't give Misty any explanation, but she'll be okay."

I opened the laptop back up and skimmed the message again, feeling the hidden disappointment behind each excited exclamation point Angela wrote. She really missed her friend.

"You still wonder why I didn't go to the wedding?"

I nodded.

"I had to begin to let go. Keeping in touch like this will eventually taper off and it'll just be one of those long lost friendships. It'll hurt her less that way. Maybe in another ten years you can go visit so she can finally meet my daughter." I could tell the thought was new to her because the idea made her face break out in a smile. "Maybe you can see Renee too." The mention of my biological Grandmother stung my mom's perfect face.

As far as I know, she had all but disowned Renee and her husband Phil years ago. She sends Christmas and birthday cards and maybe a sporadic e-mail here and there, but only Grandpa Charlie knew their daughter was even on this continent. He was privy to our secret, even if he didn't know the entire story. Not only did he not want to know, there was also the number one rule in our world that we had to follow: keep the secret. He would either need to be changed or killed, neither of which my mom would ever allow to happen. It wasn't up to her of course, and the Volturi didn't make exceptions.

I tried to push the images out of my mind, not knowing where my dad was in the house or if he was listening. Their name alone stirred up the memories I wish I could forget. Worse than the memories were the feelings. The feeling of immanent death. Of losing my family. Of being taken as a prize to add to Aro's list of the rare and gifted. I knew I couldn't let myself think like that though or else my dad would have a panic attack.

"I worry about when we eventually have to leave here. I'll be leaving Grace..." my words wavered off.

"And Marcus?"

She might as well have been able to read my mind too. "It's really not a good idea, is it?"

My mom took the laptop from me and set it down on the coffee table, taking a seat next to me on the couch. "I will never try and plan out your life for you, Renesmee, but no, probably not. Enjoy it though, it's all right to do that."

"I think I like him," I concluded. There was a question I had been meaning to ask her for a long time, but it never seemed to be a good moment. Now was as good as any. "Did you ever like anyone? Besides Dad, obviously."

She thought long and hard for an entire minute before she actually spoke. "I did. I loved someone else actually."

"What?" I was floored. My parents' love was something you only found in fairytales and love stories. I couldn't imagine there ever being someone else.

"It was lifetimes ago," she promised.

"What happened?" I was leaning in closer, like she was reading me a book I had never heard of before.

Again she sat thoughtfully, piecing together her words. I wasn't surprised that she was editing out bits for me, but her face was distorted as she did so. It looked almost painful.

"I picked Edward."

Silence crept into the room. My dad? She was in love with two men and picked my dad? I studied her face, wishing my reversed power worked on other people and not just Jacob. She sat as still as a statue, but her eyes were moving left to right as if she was reading from a book.

"So it was someone in Forks, then?"

"What it was, was a long time ago," she said. I was trying to think of her friends in Forks, but besides Angela, I didn't really know her relationship with any of them. "But from it I learned that everything happens for a reason. It all worked out in the end."

"Did he find someone else?" I couldn't read her expression. It was…painful…yet happy at the same time, maybe?

"The day I told him that…that I was picking Edward, I said I would probably never think the girl that ended up with him would be good enough. I said I'd probably be jealous."

"So he did find someone else?"

"Mmhmm…" She was avoiding me now. "And I was wrong, she is more than good enough for him."

"Are you jealous of her?"

She smiled at me gently, her topaz eyes peaceful but serious. "No, Renesmee. I loved him differently than I love your father, and I couldn't have it both ways; I was immature and selfish to think I could. I always wanted him to find in someone what I found in Edward, so he could understand. He did. He's happy. That's all that matters."

It seemed like a happy ending, but back in my mind there was something telling me she was specifically leaving something out.


	5. Instincts: Bella

**All characters are © Stephenie Meyer**

Chapter 2 - Instincts

**Bella**

Edward's last words rang in my head as I headed towards the small room off of the house that I claimed as an art studio, which is where I would end up spending the entire night.

I had never been interested in art before, but I also could barely draw identifiable stick figures, let alone turn a bunch of brush strokes into anything appealing. Then as a surprise, Edward took me and Renesmee to New York City before we had to move back out west. We went during Christmas and got to see the tree at Rockefeller Plaza, run around in FAO Schwartz (which made me wish Nessie was still a baby so I could buy the entire store for her. She wouldn't even agree to an oversized stuffed animal), and take in all of the amazing window displays on Fifth Avenue. On the very last day he brought us to the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I knew art, if art included the European masterpieces that hung around the Cullen mansion from the earlier half of the first millennium, but in The Met (I felt very sophisticated using the nickname) I found the world of modern art.

O'Keeffe, Kandinsky, Marin, Dali. They were names that meant little to me back then, but their techniques were a nice departure from the carefully stroked scenes on ancient linen paper, framed by antiqued gold. _Most of these, _Edward whispered to me, _are younger than I am. _

And so I took ownership of the room in Astoria, turning the shoebox into my studio. The floor was covered in tarps to protect the hardwood underneath, canvas of all sizes, and cans of paint beyond any rainbow were splayed across the room. There was also nothing to really do with all of my works of art, so I took advantage of the completely white walls and hung them where I deemed fit.

I balanced a small, rectangular, canvas on my easel, Edward's words still going through my head; _He loves her_.

I never really thought about what I was painting, I just went with it, but quite often this method had disastrous results. I was definitely no Picasso.

"She's lamenting about last night." I turned around to see my Adonis in the doorway. His hair was wild; very sexy, but his face was drawn.

I placed my brush and palette down and grabbed a towel to wipe my hands. "Edward, it'll be okay."

I wanted to jump into his arms, but my paint -covered apron would ruin his perfectly pressed and most likely expensive, sweater. Instead I got up on my tiptoes and pecked his lips as softly as I could.

He scowled. "Why is this so much easier for you?"

"Hmmm," I fiddled with the towel, "I'm really not sure."

Edward took the towel from my hand and wiped the paint from my cheek, smiling his crooked smile. It was probably one of the most romantic gestures he had ever done.

From the dining room I heard Renesmee bickering with Alice.

"It won't be real snow, Nessie. Don't have a cow."

"I'm not having a cow or any other farm animal! How are you ever going to get this approved?"

"Perhaps I should go run interference." Edward learned down and kissed me. "Alice is getting pretty territorial about this dance."

"Hey Bella, do we have a date after school?" Jasper's always-calm voice joined the room.

Edward laughed while walking out. "You're really intent on beating me, aren't you?"

Jasper had been helping me with my chess skills. My goal was to beat Edward. I had been getting pretty good, but Jasper was a pro. I couldn't play Alice since she saw the outcome after the first move.

"You better be prepared!" I grinned.

Once they were gone I could finally lower my smile. Edward gave me more credit that he should have. I wasn't as calm about the Jake and Nessie situation as he thought; I just knew that if I showed it, it would make it even harder for him.

At school I couldn't help but look over at my daughter whenever possible. I was studying her. Maybe I could use my supposed maternal intuition and figure out just when this is all going to happen. Edward used the opposite approach and completely avoided her.

At lunch Alice was looking quite pleased, and although it wasn't out of the norm for her, it brought me relief knowing there was no word yet from Italy. I hadn't decided whether or not that was a positive thing, but my mind obviously enjoyed the naïveté.

"You're perky today Alice." I sat down with my fake lunch.

"Marcus is cute don't you think?"

Edward sat down next to me and took my hand. "Uh huh."

"I know you don't like him Edward, but that's only because he's head over heels for Renesmee. He's a really nice guy."

"I don't understand why you're pushing Marcus on all of us, Alice, you know the direction Nessie's life will take eventually."

Alice raised her eyebrows and gave us a cunning grin. "Because Jacob has held his little wolfy claim to her since the day she was born. Some healthy competition will be good for him."

I liked how Alice thought. No relationship was easy, I definitely knew that first hand, and Jake shouldn't be able to walk in a sweep her off her feet like Prince Charming.

I heard a ruckus from the cafeteria line and saw Grace Conahan knock over almost the entire line of people waiting to pay. While the rest of the study body was staring I took a moment to study Marcus. He was handsome, I guess, if you compared him to human men. Next to the Cullen men he looked plain of course. He had that naturally healthy blonde hair and what I probably loved the most were his green eyes. I always wish I had gotten a chance to see Edward with green eyes.

"Marcus," I said under my breath.

"What, love?" Edward leaned closer.

"His name. Marcus. Do you think it bothers her?" All I could picture was the black hair, cloudy burgundy eyes and haunting presence of the Volturi ancient.

Edward looked over thoughtfully. "I can't imagine it hasn't crossed her mind, but she hasn't thought about it so it must not be too much of a bother. She named that stupid cat in Elkins Aro, remember?"

I had to laugh. I almost had a heart attack the day we were at Jacob's and she wanted to show me _Aro _without divulging that he was a stray cat she had adopted.

"Not sure. I kinda may need to go see my- grandma." I heard one of the boys at her table say. It was about the group movie date on Friday.

"Looks like Alice is right," I whispered. "They're all canceling."

Edward looked calm for that type of news, but at the same time irked. "He has decent intentions, but man, those kids have no imagination- they're really pathetic liars," Edward concluded, now smiling. We amused ourselves for the rest of lunch at the expense of Marcus and his friends.

Next period in American History, just as Mr. Doyle was getting excited about the Revolutionary War, Edward broke out in a loud laugh, quickly clasping his hand over his mouth.

"Mr. Cullen, I'm glad you find the wars fought for our freedom so amusing," the teacher said bitterly. "Why don't you step out until you've composed yourself."

My mouth dropped. The perfect-never-in-trouble Edward Cullen just got kicked out of class. I had to use all of my self-control not to break out laughing too, biting my sharp teeth into my impenetrable lip as he got his books and strode out. I was dying to know what he saw.

He was leaning against the lockers when the bell rang after what seemed to be a decade.

"Please tell me what was so funny that you get yourself kicked out of class."

He laughed again at the after thought. "Well in Chemistry Marcus cut himself-"

"You were spying?"

He only shrugged and continued. "Nessie has self control but it was still driving her crazy; she's pretty thirsty." He saw my expression drop. "Don't worry, she feigned an illness and had Jake pick her up. I'll commend her for her maturity this time."

"That was funny?"

"Oh no, what was funny was when she thought _How in the world did Dad manage to kiss that?_" He leaned down then and in front of all of the students in the hallway kissed me like he always did. A forever kiss, I called it. "Ahhh, so much easier."

I laughed too.

Alice twirled down the hallway and jumped in front of us. "I just want to let you know that yes, I saw Nessie leave- well I saw her nonexistence disappear so I'm going to assume she's with Jake. And Marcus is going to come talk to you Edward. He's being very considerate so give him the benefit of the doubt _please._"

Edward nodded but looked annoyed.

Sure enough, after school Marcus came and found us. "Edward!"

Edward turned and looked at Marcus. Very intimidating.

"I know we've never officially met," Marcus extended his hand which Edward did not return, "but I know Renesmee thinks the world of you and you are really close… Uh, I asked her out on a date and I know she'd hate it if she knew I was doing this but I wanted to ask if it was all right."

It pained me to know he had no reason to ask me permission; I was only her sister by adoption.

Edward tried to keep a straight face, but it eventually softened. "Sure Marcus, but you do know if she isn't returned in the pristine condition she leaves in, there will be problems." His cool tone made his words seem even more menacing. I laughed to myself remembering him using that same threat on Jake when I would visit La Push.

The ride home was quiet. I wasn't sure what Edward was thinking, but I was trying to wrap my head around Renesmee dating someone other than Jacob. It never occurred to me that it was even possible, but she was confused about her feelings for her best friend and that should be expected. I can't even imagine what Jake is going to do about this.

At home I immediately breezed through my sad excuse for homework so I could join Jasper at the chess table. This _would _happen. I _would _beat my perfect-at-everything husband.

Hours went by while Jasper patiently gave me all of his tips when it came to the game. "Now what move would you make, Bella?"

I stared at the board long and hard trying to recap everything I had been learning. Edward laughed from upstairs. "Edward Anthony Cullen, you shut your mouth!" I hissed.

"Bella." Jasper calmed me down.

"Bishop! I'd take your bishop!"

Jasper smiled like a proud teacher. "Yes!"

I was in the middle of praising myself when I heard the almost silent approach of a vampire, and within a blink, Nessie was in the house.

"How was hunting?" I asked. With her brown eyes I couldn't tell ever if she was hungry, unlike the rest of us who could be gauged by the color of our eyes.

"Sorry I didn't ask permission, I just really had to go."

"Don't be silly, you did the right thing. Your dad saw it all; he was very impressed."

"Bella, pay attention!" Jasper tapped the table. "If you ever want to play Edward you're going to need to concentrate!"

"Hey guys!" Jake walked in, but fearing Jasper's scolding I could only offer up a quick smile.

"She's dead set on being able to beat Edward one day," Nessie whispered. "I personally don't think it'll be that difficult. My dad cheats so his skill is no where near what Jasper's is."

"I heard that!" Edward called and we all started to laugh.

"Good evening, Jacob." Carlisle appeared out of nowhere.

"Carlisle." Jake greeted with a nod.

"Jacob do you need anything?" Esme would have cooked him a four course meal if he said he was hungry.

"No, actually I'm going to head out. I didn't realize how late it was and I have an early class tomorrow."

"Ahem." Edward was now standing on the stairs staring at Jake's hand that was rubbing my daughter's back. "I appreciate you taking her home and going hunting with her Jake. Thanks."

"Anytime." Jake grinned on his way out the door. I noticed Renesmee's face fall in disappointment.

"Oh Renesmee, _Marcus _called your cell phone earlier," Alice had her cell phone in her hands

"You can be such a busybody Alice!" Nessie stomped her foot, grabbed the phone from her and stormed off.

"Not necessary Alice," Edward growled.

From her bedroom I could hear her call Marcus back. I could tell everyone else was listening too.

"You will stay out of her head!" I glared at my husband and then turned to Alice. "And _you _will stick to the future only pertaining to our safety. And _all of you,_ ears elsewhere! No eavesdropping!"

"Wow, maternal instinct!" Alice giggled taking Jasper's hand and yelling behind her. "Going hunting now!"

My annoyance at the lack of privacy had me retreating to my studio to organize the mess I had left that morning. I was only alone with my thoughts for ten minutes when Edward came in.

"You may want to go talk to your daughter, she's in the living room."

"Renesmee?" She was sitting on the couch with my laptop open. I knew immediately that I hadn't logged out.

"Ssssorry, it was open. I'm sorry," she stammered.

"The e-mail from Angela?" I sighed.

"Y-yeah."

"I don't have any secrets, Renesmee, it's all right."

"Do you miss Angela? And Misty?" Misty. I tried to block out the people I had to leave in Elkins. Misty was one of the kindest, purest souls I had ever met.

"Of course I do, but they are from two different lifetimes. It's sad that I couldn't give Misty any explanation, but she'll be okay."

She returned to the e-mail, dissecting Angela's words, her lips pulled tightly together as if she wanted to ask me something but didn't know how.

"You still wonder why I didn't go to the wedding?"

I only got a nod in reply.

"I had to begin to let go. Keeping in touch like this will eventually taper off and it'll just be one of those long lost friendships. It'll hurt her less that way. Maybe in another ten years you can go visit so she can finally meet my daughter." I paused realizing that was a possibility even if it wasn't for another decade. "Maybe you can see Renee too."

My mom.

I swear when I think of her, I'm sure my human heart is back in my chest, breaking at the thought of what I did to her. I silently thank Alice everyday that she made me have the big wedding. That was the last thing I could give to Renee. I sent cards, always having to get them sent from Europe since that's where she thought we were. I had been sending infrequent e-mails, but I couldn't handle them after a while. The last line of her replies was always, "Please, Isabella, come home to me." I spent too many nights in Edward's arms crying a tearless cry. I now depended on Charlie to give me any updates on her.

"I worry about when we eventually have to leave here. I'll be leaving Grace..." Renesmee whispered bringing me out of my sorrow. I could tell she was editing.

"And Marcus?"

"It's really not a good idea, is it?"

I saddened again and took a seat on the couch next to her. "I will never try and plan out your life for you, Renesmee, but no, probably not. Enjoy it though, it's all right to do that."

"I think I like him." She looked at her hands, biting her lip. "Did you ever like anyone? Besides Dad, obviously."

I felt like a pile of rocks crashed on top of me. I wasn't ready for that question, although I don't think I ever would be ready for it. _I can't tell her no. I can't lie to her like that. _I debated with myself while hazy human memories of my feelings for Jacob came back with a vengeance. I could still stir up the feeling of when he kissed me; the only other man that has ever done that. I loved him. She had to understand that it's okay.

"I did. I loved someone else actually."

"What?" Her jaw dropped.

I took a deep breath. "It was lifetimes ago."

"What happened?"

I remembered after the battle with the newborns. I remember going to Jake while he was bedridden with injuries. I remember what I told him.

"I picked Edward."

My tears. Pulling over on the side of the road until Edward found me. I was about to break down in front of Renesmee and I could not let that happen.

"So it was someone in Forks, then?"

"What it was, was a long time ago. But from it I learned that everything happens for a reason. It all worked out in the end."

"Did he find someone else?" Of course she had to ask that one.

"The day I told him that… that I was picking Edward, I said I would probably never think the girl that ended up with him would be good enough. I said I'd probably be jealous."

I would never have guessed in a million years how odd those words would sound now to my own ears.

"So he did find someone else?"

"Mmhmm," was all I could say. She didn't notice how I was looking at her, but here I was looking at that someone else. "And I was wrong, she is more than good enough for him."

"Are you jealous of her?"

"No, Renesmee. I loved him differently than I love your father, and I couldn't have it both ways; I was immature and selfish to think I could. I always wanted him to find in someone what I found in Edward, so he could understand. He did. He's happy. That's all that matters."

She went back to the e-mail she said she was writing to Audrey, and I went into my bedroom.

"Bella?" Edward was at my side before I heard the door open.

I was gasping for air I didn't need. "I didn't know...what to tell her." I knew I didn't need to tell him what happened; he had heard the whole thing.

"You did fine, love," he was holding me tightly.

"Know what scares me almost as much as the Volturi," I choked.

"What's that?"

"The day she realizes she's in love with him... and the day she realizes I was too..."


	6. Coming to Terms: Renesmee

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N**: Thanks for all of the support everyone! This is a pretty important chapter- for both Nessie and Edward. Read both before commenting! My livejournal has a picture of Renesmee's dress for anyone curious.

**Chapter 3 - Coming to Terms**

"Renesmee!" Alice's bell-like voice chimed across the house. "He's here! Well... he's almost here. He'll be here in three minutes and fifty two seconds!"

"Wow Alice, you don't need to yell," I said flatly, not raising my voice even a decibel. I may have been across the house in my bedroom, but there was no need for yelling, I could hear a whisper if necessary.

I had locked them all out of my room, mainly because I didn't want Alice anywhere near my closet. My mom rarely stood up to Alice; she was rather a pushover when it came to her tiny sister, but tonight she fought Alice tooth and nail to leave me alone tonight.

It had taken me longer than I thought to finally pick out an outfit for my _date. _I had done a decent job pretending I didn't care at all, especially after talking with my mom, but when it came down to it I really did care, which is why it had taken me two hours to get ready. Marcus was taking me to Pier 11, one of the nicer restaurants in Astoria. Looking around my room at the strewn clothes everywhere my main worry, to sound completely egotistical, was that I would look _too good_. I couldn't give Marcus the wrong impression. That wouldn't be fair to him. I finally decided on a simple black dress that wasn't too showy, and not the least bit sexy. I had definitely inherited Alice's taste in couture, but I needed to keep this outfit neutral.

I took a deep breath before facing the firing squad. My dad would be the most pleased with my choice of wardrobe, although he'd probably prefer a potato sack if he had the final say. In the living room my whole family was waiting for me, and I mean my _whole _family.

"Hey Squirt!" Before I even noticed Emmett and Rosalie were there, Emmett had me off the floor in a huge bear hug.

"Emmettttttttttt, my dress!" I squirmed out of his embraced. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"Just visiting." His smile was a total give away. They were snooping, wanting to see their niece go on her first date.

"Emmett is nosy, that's what." Rosalie smiled.

My mom was glowing while looking at me, and although my dad was attempting to look nonchalant, he was secretly smiling too. Esme was in Carlisle's arms, I swear she'd be crying if she could. Jasper looked completely bored by the entire show.

"You look beautiful, Renesmee," my mom whispered.

Alice was standing at the door seconds before Marcus knocked. I felt badly for him, having to walk into a room full of very intimidating creatures. But he looked very handsome in his button down shirt, jacket, and slacks, and smiled the second he saw me.

"Wow," he murmured. I saw my dad tense up.

I quickly introduced him to the rest of the family, barely recognizing the motorcycle engine getting closer to the house. He offered his hand to the men, trying his best not to have a reaction to their cold skin. Esme got overly excited and was about to hug him, but Edward put a hand on her shoulder. A cold hand was one thing, but a freezing cold body was another.

"Hey guys!" Jake barged in practically pushing Marcus down.

The room suddenly felt awkward, the eyes of my family darting between Jacob and me. My heart picked up a little and I could feel my cheeks going flush.

"Umm, hey Jake. You remember Marcus from school?" I realized I was shaking.

Jake looked Marcus up and down, sizing him up. If it wasn't hard enough for Marcus to have to meet my family, Jake was a force all his own with his massive frame and muscular physique. "Yup," was the only thing he said.

"Well," my mom's hand was at my back practically pushing me out the door, "you guys should get going."

As I walked away I felt an intense stare at my back. I glanced behind me only once, and it was my dad whose face was boring into me. He looked... hurt, with his eyes blinking rapidly, a reaction I didn't understand since he didn't need to blink in the first place. When Marcus put his hand on the small of my back I heard the sharp intake of air. Marcus quickly, but casually removed his hand.

He opened the passenger door of his brand new Mustang and I graciously took my seat, still keeping an eye on my nosy family. I didn't say anything until we were down the road, knowing that they would be able to hear us for quite a distance. "Sorry about my family. They're... over protective."

He grinned. "No worries, it must be nice to have so many people that care about you." I felt him reach for my hand, his skin several degrees cooler than mine. He looked down and then glanced over at me. "Are you feeling okay? You feel warm."

"Uh yeah, I have a high body temperature. Completely normal for me." I hadn't considered how noticeable it would be since I was used to either my family's frigid touch or Jake, whose body ran even hotter than mine.

"You sure are something, Renesmee." I could tell he wasn't talking about my temperature anymore. "You really look... just wow."

Marcus really was a nice guy. He came off at school a little more arrogant, but I could tell now that it was mainly for show - a drawback to hanging out with Brandon and Ethan for too long, both of which thought the world and the female population of Astoria High School, revolved around them.

By the time we got into town I felt Marcus' hand sweating, I couldn't imagine how uncomfortable it was to hold onto my hand for that long. I felt badly when I noticed how far out of his way he had to drive just to pick me up - as usual our house was set in the woods at the very outskirts of town. There really was no other option though, unless I wanted someone to drop me off. He had his license and I didn't. _Three weeks_, I cheered to myself.

"Must be nice to be able to drive. I can't wait," I wanted to start a conversation again, feeling badly I had been so lost in thought the entire trip.

"It's got its benefits," he said, surprised at the sudden comment. "Which car are you getting?" It was known, thanks to Grace who was one of the only visitors to our house, that the Cullens had multiple garages with many cars.

"Well, I can use any of the cars, but I got a motorcycle."

Marcus only raised his eyebrows at me as he pulled into a parking spot. Like a gentleman, he went to the passenger door and opened it for me.

Greeting us at the door was the hostess, a senior I recognized from school, but whose name I could recall. She immediately gave us an up and down look, but her eyes were mostly on Marcus.

"Collins. Reservations for two."

We had taken a seat next to one of the large windows that surrounded the steak house over looking the Columbia River. The hostess still had her eyes on my handsome date, and I had to laugh the second she left us.

"What?" Marcus asked.

"You're a lot like my d- brother," I almost slipped.

"I'll take that as a compliment, but in what ways?"

"Edward," I was careful to watch my words, "does things for Bella like open doors. And you're both charming and don't really notice it."

"Charming, huh?" His eyes were smiling at me.

I turned my mouth up in a half smile. "See, you didn't even notice that the hostess was all googily eyed at you."

"Well, I am concentrating on something - someone - much more important right now."

It was only small talk until we ordered. It had been a few days since I last hunted and my appetite for human food was back to normal.

"So, tell me about this motorcycle," he finally said. "It's not everyday you see a girl like you into bikes."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What do you mean a girl like me?"

"Oh, it wasn't an insult," he stammered. "It's just that you're pretty - ugh this is going to probably offend you too - well, you're girlie."

He wasn't wrong there I guess. My clothing obsession, preference for designer labels, and constant fussing with my hair would make me a prime candidate for the "girlie" category.

"My mom rides, Jake rides- they taught me years ago and I'm pretty good."

"Don't take this the wrong way either, but it makes me nervous to know you'll be so vulnerable on a bike. I'm surprised your brother isn't panicked over it."

His concern was really endearing, but totally unnecessary. I couldn't explain that I was indestructible of course, and that he was in much more danger just a half an hour ago standing in my house among several vampires and a werewolf. "I'll be fine, Edward trusts me."

"So... how does Jake fit into your family? He moved here with you guys?" I should have guessed that would be a question on the agenda.

"Yeah, he's a good friend of the family. He's my best friend."

"He didn't seem very friendly before." Marcus rolled his eyes.

"Jake is just... well I'm like his little sister."

"Sure," he said sarcastically. I didn't understand what he meant by it, but our food came and distracted us from the conversation.

I ate my steak carefully. I wanted to order it rare but my mom suggested in front of Marcus I should go with medium. Rare wasn't something most teenage girls had a palate for.

"How's your steak?" Marcus asked between bites.

"Excellent, this place is wonderful." I was mainly enjoying the waterfront view and the colors the setting sun was making against the water.

"I was thinking we could go to Memorial Park afterwards? If you'd like to, that is."

I nodded, speechless at first and finally forced "Sure!" out of my mouth. I was anything but sure.

When the check came, Marcus slipped several bills into the fold and handed it immediately back to the waiter. "No change," he said suavely.

One reason Marcus probably felt more comfortable around me had to do with the fact that both of our families were well off. His father was in charge of all of the hydroelectric dams that were located along the Columbia River. Astoria was generally just a middle class town.

"Aren't you cold?" We had left the restaurant and were walking towards Memorial Park that ran along the river.

It was a cooler evening, but of course I felt fine. "No, I'm okay."

Marcus didn't believe me, taking his jacket off and putting it over my shoulders. I couldn't refuse with the way he was looking at me. By the time we got to the pier, one of the best views at the park, the sun was gone, but there were no clouds in the sky - a rarity around here - and I could actually see the stars. Marcus noticed me looking around.

"What are you looking for up there?" He teased.

"My _brother_," I almost slipped again, "bought Bella a star, but I don't think we can see it without a telescope."

"Edward and Bella have a great relationship. It's hard not to be jealous of them."

Everyone was jealous of them. Alice and Jasper had the same type of relationship, but theirs was so much more private, you couldn't read them like you could my parents. Knowing that I would never be able to be with a human, I wondered looking at Marcus, if I could ever have what they have. If I could ever love someone so much that my life would mean nothing without him. If anything ever happened to one of my parents, the other would surely die -maybe not physically, but love like theirs only comes along once in a lifetime, even if that lifetime is an eternity.

Marcus was moving closer to me now, and I could feel the coolness of him becoming more prominent. His hand found the small of my back again, and without any onlookers, he pulled me closer to him so he could wrap his arm around my waist. The response my body was giving me was confusing. I had butterflies in my stomach but I felt- weird. It was wrong. Something was wrong but my thoughts were all muddled. My heart picked up when I finally figured out what was flashing through my mind. It was Jacob. I didn't want Marcus' arm around me, I wanted Jacob's.

"We better not worry Edward and Carlisle," I pulled away flustered.

Marcus looked disappointed that I wasn't enjoying his company, but agreed. "Yeah, for a first date and all."

I couldn't speak the entire drive home. I wanted Jacob, and not in the way that a best friend should want him. I had been in denial thinking that I only thought of him as a big brother - as a best friend. These were new feelings - or at least it was the first time I openly admitted to them. I liked Marcus because he was interested in me, and the attention he gave me - a different kind of attention - was almost addicting. Staring into the woods we were now driving through, getting closer to my house, I could picture the oversized russet wolf running parallel to us through the forest, watching me, wanting me like I wanted him.

Marcus pulled the car over to the shoulder of the road well before the turn off for my house.

"What are you doing?"

He looked down, embarrassed. "Well, I'm going to guess that there will be several pairs of eyes watching me drop you off. I thought we could have a more private goodbye here."

"Oh, okay." I wasn't sure what this private goodbye was going to include, but I had my guesses.

"I really had a great time tonight, Renesmee. Really great." I noticed he was leaning closer to me with each word he spoke. Without even thinking, my body was doing the same thing.

"I did too. Thank you so much for dinner." _What am I doing? What am I getting myself into?_

I knew he wanted to kiss me, so I let him. At first it was just his lips against mine, no reaction from me. But as his lips parted I could smell the cool mint from his gum and I parted my lips too. His hand found my cheek and his head turned slightly taking in more of my lips. I didn't want this, I didn't want him, but I couldn't stop. My hands wandered without my permission; one on his thigh and the other running through his sandy hair. He was so nice and generous and the things he said to me were wonderful. Why wouldn't I want this? My heart sped up to breakneck speed and I realized this was my first kiss. My very first kissed. It was wrong. I didn't want to - I shouldn't want to - be kissing Marcus Collins.

"We should go," I said breathlessly, forcing myself to pull back.

"Yeah, sure." Marcus' reply was short.

As predicted there were eyes peeking out all over the place, watching me get out of the car. I was practically tripping over myself to escape the awkwardness that our kiss created. Being normally very graceful, it was embarrassing to know that my family - especially Emmett - was watching. I didn't have anything left to say that either would be a lie or come out completely wrong.

"See you in school Monday," he said in a dull voice.

I closed the door and looked down through the open window. "Yeah. Thank you again, it was a great night." That was as safe as I could be.

Marcus only nodded. The wheels of his car spun out and he was gone. My heart dropped in my chest knowing I probably hurt his feelings, and I dragged myself up to the house.

If my dad wasn't reading my thoughts, I'm sure an unaware Marcus had plenty of things going through his own mind. I wasn't looking forward to facing anyone inside.

"I don't want to talk about it," I mumbled as I walked through the door, not looking anyone in the eye. I heard Emmett begin to make a comment about my stumble out of the car, but Rosalie elbowed him in the gut before he could finish.

My heart was burning and my chest felt open and exposed as I rushed passed Jake who was almost blocking the hallway.

"Date with Prince Charming not go so well?" he asked rudely.

I only took a millisecond to glare at him and ran to my room slamming the door. I waited to hear someone chastise him for being mean to me, but the living room was silent.

I locked my door and let myself cry. I wasn't quite sure what I was crying over exactly, but it made me feel better than just keeping it all bottled in. I expected someone, at least my mom, to come knocking on my door to talk to me, but no one did. I ripped the black dress off of my body, not even bothering with the zipper. It was suffocating me - binding me to a night that made me come to terms with feelings I had been hiding for a while. The closest thing to me was a t-shirt left on my bed and I threw that on, the cotton feelings extra soft in comparison to the restrictive dress.

I heard my phone vibrate in my purse across the room but I couldn't bear to leave the safety of my bed. I heard very little from the living room in between my sobs, but I knew Jacob was out there. Even though he wasn't speaking, I could just tell. That made another round of tears well up in my eyes, because there wasn't anything I wanted more than to run to him... except he was rude to me. He was mean. I was obviously upset and instead of grabbing me in one of his big you-have-no-choice-I'm-going-to-make-you-laugh hugs, he snapped at me. I pulled my covers over my head so I was in complete darkness. I needed to sleep. I couldn't handle these emotions in my waking state; they were too dangerous.

_Jane was standing only inches from my face, and even though I knew in the real world I towered over her by several inches, she was taller than me - she was looking down at me with an evil smile dancing on her lips. _Your wolf is gone, _she hissed at me. Her breath was so icy, the vapors of the venom turned into condensation when they met my hot skin and I could feel it dripping down my entire body. It was only the two of us in the same field, the one I didn't know. This is when Jake usually came. This is when Jake saved me. _

_But he didn't come._

_Jane's hand was around my neck now, her teeth bared and leaning in. I could feel her sharp teeth puncture my no longer impenetrable skin. I felt the human blood draining from me. I screamed._

"Renesmee!"

I was soaking wet with sweat. My hair was sticking to my face, the t-shirt I had on was saturated, and the bed sheets were damp. I was in my room, not in the field, and standing over me was every single member of my family, and Jacob, each one looking as terrified as the next. The door behind them was broken straight from the hinges.

I was petrified. My dad was the one who had screamed my name, bringing me out of the horror, but I couldn't tell if he was really there. I thought it had to be another dream because I couldn't seem to completely wake up. I reached up and grabbed my neck where Jane had bitten me, but there was nothing there. I started to shake. My mom - I think - was the one that picked me up, carrying me to the bathroom.

Rosalie was there, running the water in the bathtub and Alice was helping me out of my t-shirt. The water was cool, sending shivers up my body. I couldn't completely wake myself up, and even when I tried to hold myself up, I fell back limply into Alice's arms.

I heard talking outside the door but they weren't real words, just random syllables strung together. My dad? Carlisle? ...Jacob?

"What sweetheart?" I smelled the floral scent of my mom nearby. I hadn't realized I had said anything.

"She's asking for..." I tried to hold onto Alice's words but I couldn't anymore. I had to get out of this dream.

Then I really woke up. The sun was shining directly into my east-facing window. I tried to pull things from last night, but I could only grasp onto the feelings. I noticed I wasn't wearing the same t-shirt I had put on, but a set a pajamas. _So the bath was real. _Besides that, nothing. Just fear.

My dad was sitting solemnly in the chair my mom used to read to me in when I was little. His face showed so much pain I wanted to cry and ask him what hurt him so much, but then I guessed it had to do with me. With last night. With the fear.

"I'm okay," I whispered. My voice was scratchy and stung a little.

I could see the purple circles under his eyes were more defined than usual. His gold eyes were midnight black, and his alabaster skin was more translucent than I ever remember seeing it. My words didn't stir up any reaction. He didn't speak. He didn't move. He wasn't even breathing.

"Daddy?" I called to him again.

In a second he was at my side, his hands shaking when he pulled me to him. "Nessie, I'm so sorry," he croaked. "I'm sorry you have to be a part of any of this. I'm so sorry. I promise nothing will ever happen to you. Nothing will ever happen to Bella. I will _never _let any harm come to you. I swear my life on it."

"Dad, dad, dad," I was soothing him. "I'm okay." I thought I was at least. I didn't even know what happened last night, but if it was on track with my other nightmares, it was about them. About them coming.

"I'm so sorry." He could barely speak now, and I was only guessing that's what he said.

I fell back asleep with my dad sitting in bed with me, my head on his lap. When I opened my eyes again the sun was higher in the sky now, covered in clouds, most likely making it afternoon. I was also alone, tucked back beneath clean, dry, covers.

I walked out to an empty house. Everyone was gone except for Esme, who appeared silently from the backyard.

"Where is everyone?" I stretched and my body ached.

Esme's eyes saying what I figured I'd be getting for a while now: remorseful, sad, scared. I was now breakable to all of them. Whatever happened last night was bad. "They went to Portland to see Emmett and Rosalie's house. I wanted someone to be here when you woke up."

My grandma's compassion was infinite and I loved her dearly for it.

"Hungry?" She held up a plate of brownies. I grinned and reached for one.

I sat on the front porch, taking small bite of the brownie, letting the chocolate melt in my mouth. The cloud cover was even thicker now, the darkness promising a storm. I was out there for a long time, well after the brownie was gone, trying to put together my thoughts before I had to face everyone else who would not let last night slide by with a simple offer of a brownie the way Esme did.

I finally came to the conclusion that there were two things I had come to terms with during the course of the last day: First, I had fallen head over heels for Jacob. Second, I was probably going to die to soon for him to fall for me.

**I suggest you read Edward's POV before you comment- but if you would like to tell me how wonderful the chapter is and can't contain yourself any longer, feel free. Author's note is at the end of Edward's chapter.**


	7. Coming to Terms: Edward

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**Chapter 3 - Coming to Terms**

I heard nothing but Marcus' nervous thoughts after they had gotten into his car. Renesmee wouldn't talk or think, knowing I'd hear whatever she had to say. My fists were still clenched and it wasn't until Bella forcefully opened one to weave her fingers between mine, did they go slack.

My eyes were stuck on Jacob. I couldn't feel his pain, but it must have been more excruciating than I could comprehend right then, because Jasper had to excuse himself.

_I can't be around him, Edward, _he told me and slipped out of the room.

I went to play my piano, the entire time Jake stood at the same window he had been looking out of when they drove off together. I could see only half of him, but every minute he would take a deep shaking breath. He didn't care about me reading his mind, either that or he couldn't control it with the strong emotions going through him.

_Why can't she love me? Why can't she realize she loves me? It isn't supposed to be this way. It's not. _The anguish in his thoughts was torture to me.

I didn't agree with Alice. Jacob did not need competition. He didn't feel like he had a claim to her, not at all. She was his end all be all. My daughter was everything to him and if anything, she held claim to him - and didn't even know it.

My fingers froze on the keys. That's what was bothering me this entire time. As hard as it was for me to accept that Renesmee and Jacob would soon be together, what had been bothering me these past weeks with Marcus was... _he wasn't Jake. _I could be as overprotective of a father as I wanted to, but when it came down to it the only man I ever wanted Nessie to be with was Jacob. Jake was my brother. He was my son. My loyalty fell to him, and it wasn't just my daughter that was bringing out my protective nature - but Jacob as well. This was just as much about his pain and his feelings, as it was about her.

_I'll be back, _Jake said silently, already walking out the door. _I need to run._

Emmett came in and leaned on the piano. "How awkward was _that? _It's one thing when no one knows you have a crush on someone, but we _all _know - well we minus Nessie."

"We agreed when she was born that we were on her time. If Jake wanted to he could profess his love for her, but he won't. He wants her to figure out her feelings on her own."

"Whatever," Emmett shrugged. "It just seems kind of dramatic to prolong this. Can't you just tell her about imprinting and let her figure the rest out on her own?"

"No we cannot," Bella's voice came sharply from the living room. "Do you know how much that would freak her out? She is still only seven, whether she looks eighteen or not. She doesn't have the same life experiences as the rest of us. There's a part of her who is still immature in many ways."

"Emmett, are you coming to hunt with us?" I could see Rosalie sitting on the couch. She hadn't said a word to Jacob; they probably would never really get along.

One by one the rest of the family disappeared out of the window leaving me alone with my wife. She sat down next to me to watch me play, her fingers running along my arm. "What's worrying you so much Edward? Marcus is a good kid, he'll be fine with her."

I stopped playing and took her hand. "It just doesn't feel right."

"I know." Her free hand moved to my face, turning me so her lips could find mine. I closed the top to the keyboard and picked her up, sitting her on top of it.

I brought her in for a desperate kiss. She could feel how badly I needed her and returned the intensity by pulling me into her. My hands went under her shirt, running up and down her soft body and she gasped.

"Bedroom?" she whispered.

I fingered the waist of her pants, finding the button to her jeans. "No."

"Edward, someone could-" I didn't let her finish, my lips were crushing into hers and in one quick motion she was nearly naked, sitting on my piano. We had never been this bold before.

She closed her eyes and leaned her head back as my hands continued to explore her.

"Bella. Bella, look at me. Don't take your eyes off of me." And she didn't, the entire time.

I heard Jacob's thoughts early enough that we were able to get dressed and curl up on the couch together before he came through the front door. Jake only raised his eyebrows, pressing his lips together trying to stifle a smile. I glanced over to the piano room and my boxers were there on the floor. In my haste I had forgotten to put them back on.

_I won't say anything. I know she'd be humiliated. _

Bella was too perceptive and I knew if I nodded or even moved my eyes she'd know he was talking to me. What I really wanted to do was talk to _him_. I wanted to tell him that I was on his side and I wanted him for my daughter... but I didn't know if that would make the situation worse or better.

His amusement with our sexual escapades quickly diminished and he stared out the same window again. _Where is she? What's taking so long? If he tries anything with her I swear. _

The rest of the family was back only minutes before we heard Marcus pull up. I could hear his thoughts before he even put the car in park.

_Stupid kiss. I shouldn't have kissed her. It's that Jacob guy, I know it is. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. She's so amazing though. Man, her family is such a bunch of busybodies._

I noticed then that everyone but Jacob had moved to the windows and were looking at the couple from behind the curtains. Jacob stood across the room, his arms crossed in front of him, and his thoughts were both painful and angry.

"He kissed her," I growled. "Little pest."

Alice rolled her eyes. "Well that's usually what happens at the end of a date, Edward."

_I'm going to kill him, _Jake's mental tone immediately got me worried that he would try something. I always questioned the control he had over his transformation if Renesmee was ever involved.

"Jacob," I warned, "don't even think about it."

_He _touched _her Edward! How are you okay with that? How?_

I wasn't okay with it, but I couldn't give that away, it would only add more fuel to the fire. I shook my head and closed my eyes.

Emmett distracted me by laughing. Renesmee in her urgency to get out of the car, her thoughts frazzled and confused, tripped and almost landed on her face. _I shouldn't have kissed him. This is all wrong. I know I hurt him. Ugh, this is horrible. Oh shoot! Ugh, they're all going to make fun of me for being clumsy._

"The date didn't go so well, let's not pester her about it, okay?" I looked around the room, and stopped on Emmett who was still amused with her close call. "Don't even think about teasing her, Emmett."

Renesmee was worse than she sounded when she walked through the door, looking like she was near tears. "I don't want to talk about it," she muttered avoiding eye contact.

"Nice tri-" Emmett completely disregarded my warning, but Rosalie jabbed him as soon as he opened his mouth.

I held my breath as she walked by Jacob, his thoughts still extremely bitter. I was begging him with my eyes not to say anything, but it was too late. "Date with Prince Charming not go so well?"

The fury in me skyrocketed so quickly that I could barely see. Bella and Emmett both grabbed an arm, even though that probably wouldn't have helped at all. By the time I got back in control of myself Renesmee was slamming the door to her room.

We all stood there silent.

A minute went by, the only noise was Jacob's short, shallow breaths and erratic heartbeats. Then I heard her crying.

"I highly suggest you leave now, Jacob." My words were short and static.

For one of the first times ever, Jacob Black did not argue with me, but left with his head hanging low. He leaned over to Bella and whispered an apology, but she refused to acknowledge him.

"Should I go in?" Bella finally asked.

"I think you need to let her cry it out. She is really confused right now, but it's all right. It won't be long." Alice had her infamous secret smile on her face_._

"Can you see something, Alice?"

"It's almost impossible to be certain of a time frame since I really can only see our reactions and not Jacob or Nessie, but it'll all be out in the open soon enough."

"She's definitely torn right now. I think she realized a lot tonight." I didn't go into specifics with them, but she was openly admitting her feelings for Jake - an odd sense of relief and worry ran through me at the same time.

"Why don't we just tell the mutt? Give him the go ahead." Rosalie finally put in her two cents.

Esme was shaking her head. "No, just because we have Edward and Alice's abilities, doesn't mean we should mettle with the situation. They have to handle this on their own. We can't interfere."

My mother, as always, was right.

It wasn't until I couldn't hear her crying anymore did I relax some. Bella made me sit on the couch with her and watch television with Emmett. Jasper, who hadn't said a word in a very long time, sat on the arm of the chair and leaned over to me.

"Remember when you didn't know how Bella felt about you? Try and remember back to the very beginning how you were miserable over it. Now multiple that by one hundred and that's what is going through Jacob right now. I know this because I could handle your emotions, while his almost knock me over they're so overpowering."

"You don't understand," I said through my teeth.

"I'm not trying to, I'm just giving you another perspective." With that he left. He would have no more to say on the subject.

I was never one for television, but I didn't want to leave Bella's side. Eventually, I could hear Jacob's thoughts from outside, and faintly hear him pacing. I should have figured he wouldn't be able to go far.

It had been over one hundred years since I last had a dream or nightmare, but a second later it was as if the most horrible one I could think of was coming to life. Renesmee was screaming.

Everyone was scrambling to their feet, the nerves overtaking our gracefulness. Jacob was in the house before I reached her bedroom door, Renesmee's blood curdling screams still piercing our ears.

Jane. Blood. Death. I saw her nightmare. I saw her dying.

I didn't bother to knock, but instead ripped the door off of its hinges and threw it aside, crashing against the frame, splintering the wood. I was at her side pulling the comforter that was over her head off. It was drenched in sweat, as was her entire body.

"Renesmee!" I screamed afraid that I would hurt her if I shook her in my current state of panic.

She opened her eyes, but she didn't really seem to be in there completely. Her hand flew up to her neck and held it, her breathing still labored, her eyes darting around trying to gain some sense of consciousness. Her body started to shake so violently it looked like she was having a seizure. Bella picked her up and carried her to the bathroom. It wasn't until then did I see Jake's face and felt a stabbing pain in my heart. One single tear was sliding down his cheek, the voice in his head was so panicked, yet still trying to hold himself back from scooping her away from Bella, his latent instinct being to protect her.

My wife and sisters ran a bath for her while the rest of us paced outside.

"Carlisle, what was that? What's wrong with her?" I had never heard the tone of voice Jake was using, I couldn't even put an emotion to it.

"Night terror," Carlisle sighed. "She probably won't remember any of this, they usually don't completely wake up from it."

"What-what's a night terror?" Jake was losing it.

"It's not really a dream, but the feeling of pure fear," Carlisle sounded depressed speaking the words. "Sufferers can't recall anything about them, but I'm guessing, Edward, you can."

I heard Nessie's voice from instead the bathroom but I couldn't make out her words. "What sweetheart?" Bella asked her.

"She's asking for Jacob," Alice replied.

Rosalie came out of the bathroom to get a pair of pajamas for her and disappeared back inside.

"Jane. Jane was-," my voice broke, "she was killing her."

I wished my body could give into my emotions. I wished I were able to be sick, or at least faint. Something to escape from all of this.

Bella came out carrying my now extremely fragile-looking baby girl. Esme had already changed the sheets on the bed and they rested my still unresponsive daughter's head back on her pillow. Bella came over to me and gripped my hand, her breathing shaky.

"What caused this?" she asked.

"Lack of sleep, serious emotional stress or trauma," Carlisle ticked off reasons on his fingers. "It normally only happens in children, but since Renesmee is technically only seven years old, it's hard to gauge where her mental development, regardless of how advanced she is, compares to her physical development."

We had a clear view of her from the hallway now that there was no door. Jake stood there staring at her, trying incredibly hard not to run to her, trying not to overstep his boundaries.

"Can I- can I sit in there with her? I promise I won't bother her." He was looking at me.

It seemed that days had gone by since she had left on her date, even though it had only been several hours. I had decided then that Jacob is whom I wanted for her, and I should honor that decision. I nodded and he went to the chair in the corner and sat down, his eyes not moving off of her.

The rest of us could stand for an eternity with no need to ever sit again, and so we stood out in the hallway looking between a now peaceful Nessie, and a forlorn Jacob.

"What is she dreaming about?" Bella pulled on my arm.

"Nothing."

"Edward, I'm serious, you can tell me!"

"I am, love. There isn't anything there; her mind is blank."

It was soon only Bella and I standing there, the rest of the family eventually wandering off to do their own nightly activities. Jake didn't moved from his place in the chair.

"How do I protect her from this?" I wasn't talking directly to Bella, but I needed to talk out my thoughts. "She dreams about them too much. Now she dreams that she's going to _die._"

"There isn't anything you can do, Edward." She was rubbing my back, talking smoothly.

"I will never let anything happen to her Bella, I swear. Either of you." I brought her closer to me and kissed her forehead. "You two are my world."

"I know." And we stood there for hours longer, until the sun started to rise and Jacob's head started to nod off in exhaustion.

"Jake, get some sleep," I leaned over and whispered to him. "I'll call you if anything comes up."

"I can't leave her," he shook his head.

"Jake, please, she went through a lot last night. I don't want to overwhelm her when she wakes up."

_Can I? _He looked over at her and back to me. I nodded.

In two strides he was at her bedside, only staring at her at first. Bella must have had her shield up because there were no thoughts to match his expression. Just like the other night, the night I had gotten so mad at him over, he leaned down and kissed her forehead. He didn't say another word to us as he left, just the sound of his motorcycle as he drove off.

I took his place in the chair, and Bella kissed the top of my head before leaving me alone with her. Renesmee's bronze hair was displayed wildly around her pale face and I her lips were parted ever so slightly to allow for a rhythmic intake of air. I had been so mesmerized by her, I didn't notice the sun coming through her window until she began to stir. I froze.

_So the bath was real, _she thought as she noticed her pajamas. She tried to replay the night but all she could hold onto was the fear.

"I'm okay," she tried to speak but her voice was raw from the screaming.

I couldn't speak or move. A part of me felt helpless. Felt dead.

"Daddy?" She called me Daddy. My nonexistent heart started to beat and I woke up from my daze.

I was sitting with her on the bed, holding her with trembling arms. "Nessie, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you have to be a part of any of this. I'm so sorry. I promise nothing will ever happen to you. Nothing will ever happen to Bella. I will _never _let any harm come to you. I swear my life on it."

"Dad, dad, dad," she patted me on the back. "I'm okay." _He must have seen the dream. It must have been about them. _

Her thoughts broke me again. "I'm so sorry."

She laid her head in my lap and we didn't say anymore. It didn't take long before she fell back asleep, looking as angelic as always.

An hour later Carlisle came in. _Son, why don't you get out of the house for a little while?. Rosalie and Emmett want to show everyone their new place. You need to get your mind off of this._

I didn't want to leave her, but a part of me saw Carlisle's point.

_Esme will stay here for when she wakes up, _he added.

I didn't say anything while we ran through the woods, a much quicker mode of transportation than taking a car. My mind was jumbled with so many things, and even with the extra capacity my immortal brain could hold, it was difficult to sort everything out.

It wasn't until we reached the city limits did I find any clarity. There were two things I had to learn to accept: First, Jacob and Renesmee were in love with each other, and that's exactly what I wanted. Second, I was probably going to die fighting to keep them alive.

**I hope that was more intense than angsty. I had to stop writing a few times because *I* was getting all emotional. Not crying, but just really overwhelmed. Please don't go and think I'm going to go all suicidal and start killing everyone off. Reviews like that just ruin my mojo. I really found while I started writing for Renesmee that I was seeing both Bella and Edward in her personality- she's really a mix of them with the things she says and does. I am falling in love with her... I LOVE writing for her :)**

**And yes, the cat is out of the bag that Jake and Nessie finally have feelings for each other - and everyone is so sure of it ex**_**cept for Jake and Nessie. **_**This isn't fifth grade when your friend passes a note to the boy in the next row over to see if he likes you. The rest is up to them.**

**And does everyone love Daddyward? I love him! I think he's the most perfect dad ever! We didn't really know Daddyward before because boo three of Breaking Dawn is Bella's point of view. We all saw Bella's devotion to her daughter, but we didn't get to see Edward's. I hope this represents it well.**

**And night terrors are very real things. Wikipedia has a decent description of them if you're curious.**


	8. Sleep Tight: Renesmee

**Characters © Stephenie Meyers**  
**  
A/N:** I mentioned when I started writing not all chapters would have two POVs, and this is one of them. If I rewrote this one it would be very repetitive. Enter the real drama now!

**Chapter 4 - Sleep Tight**

I immediately knew this wasn't really a dream. My dreams had faded edges to them, my line of vision was always very limited to what was in front of me, and above all I always knew I was dreaming.

This wasn't one of those.

I walked through the sandy stone building I was in, shaded from the incredibly bright sun outside that seemed to waver in the heat. My first fear was that I was in Italy, but the air was sharp and hot and the old, torn, canopies that hung over the sand bricks didn't look like anything you'd find in Europe. I looked down at my clothing- it was what I had worn earlier that day, just jeans and a long sleeve t-shirt that fit in nicely with a cool Oregon September day. Here however, the people passing wore baggy clothing. Some were in robes from head to toe, and all of the woman had their dark hair covered in long fabric; the ones remember seeing in my history books while studying the Muslim religion.

The dialect they were speaking in was completely foreign to me, sounding nothing like the romantic languages I was fluent in. A child ran by the doorless entryway I was hiding in and stopped to look at me for only a moment before running off. His olive pallor reminded me of Benjamin, the leader of Audrey's coven. Where was he from? Egypt?

"It worked," said a thick accented voice hiding in the darkness.

I jumped ten feet in the air, spinning as I went, facing even deeper shadows of the grotto. There against the far wall was a man. He had the same raven hair as the people in the street, but his olive skin had a pale tinge to it. He was barely as tall as I was, and his body was round. He wasn't even in direct light but already could I see the crystals appear on his skin, with the sunshine enhancing his blood-red eyes.

"Who are you?" I knew I could run for it if I needed to. He wouldn't be able to go out into the sun if he knew what was good for him. Exposure was a death sentence if the Volturi found out.

"I apologize, child, I did not mean to frighten you. I am Ramses."

This has to be a dream. It has to be.

"You are sleeping, but this is no dream," he said pulling my thoughts from my mind. A mind reader? No, I had been in my bedroom sleeping. I remember. "The prophet's child. I cannot believe it is really you."

I backed away from the man, my hand behind me searching for the open arch, not taking my eyes off of him. Once I felt the wall end I turned and ran. The streets were crowded now with mumbles of sharp tongues, but my hearing picked up his last words: _able to straddle two worlds_. I dared to turn around just once, seeing the man's shadow still in the building. I knew he wouldn't follow me. When I turned back around my body impacted with a woman walking down the street, and we both flew back to the ground.

Then I was in my bed.

The most reasonable explanation was it was a ridiculously life-like dream, except I could still smell the mixture of heat and sand. Sense of smell is not something I ever had in my dreams before. Then there was an instinct deep inside of me, trying to convince my rational mind that this was something else.

From where the sun sat in my window I knew it was around eight and I might as well get up, even though I felt exhausted. It was as if I hadn't really slept at all. Today was a big day; the day of my over the top, ridiculously expensive, Sweet Sixteen party. I didn't even bother arguing with Alice when she announced her plans. She had taken a break from her winter formal planning to set the entire thing up, and like my mom, it was hard not to give Alice what she wanted.

"Happy Birthday!" Alice bounced on top of me as soon as I walked into the living room.

"My birthday isn't until tomorrow, Alice." I yawned and rubbed my eyes.

My mom was sitting on the couch and looked over her shoulder at me. "Did you not sleep well?"

"Just a really weird dream. For once not about Volturi. I was actually in... _Egypt._ At least I think it was."

I craved coffee and went into the kitchen to hunt some down. As the water percolated in the coffee maker, I leaned on the counter looking out over the front yard. The cognitive part of my brain was fighting with the fanciful imaginative part trying to sort out what happened. Was anything really impossible?

He had called me the prophet's child, a name no one really brought up because the idea of this supposed prophecy of the Chosen Ones was an awkward topic in the Cullen house. My dad was completely against the idea and thought it was a bunch of nonsense, Carlisle tending to agree with him. My mom on the other hand - I think because she was the newest to this life - was more sensitive to the fact that we are supernatural. We are an anomaly to the world that exists outside of our own. That and she believes in destiny and fate. Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper had no opinion whatsoever. Jasper's main worry was the army that the Volturi was building. We didn't know whether or not the ancients believed in the prophecy, but they were at least concerned that it would plant a seed in our heads to follow through with it. Alice was on the fence about the entire thing, and right now her concentration was solely on the Volturi's next move.

By the time my coffee was ready, Alice was pulling Jasper out the door to meet the caterers and florists for my party.

"I'll be back in time for presents!" she called. The family wanted to give me my presents before the party, even though I couldn't imagine what I would be getting. The party was going to be extravagant enough.

Alice had rented out one of the lofts in downtown Portland, she said she needed a "blank slate" to work with-whatever that meant. She went as far as to reserve several hotel rooms across the street so a bunch of teenagers didn't have to drive two hours back to Astoria when the party was over. If there was any doubt in town that we were filthy rich, it was now not even a question.

There was very little push back from the parents about this co-ed sleepover. Between Carlisle and Esme, Rosalie and Emmett (although Emmett should be considered one of the "kids"), and finally Grace's mother, parents felt there was enough adult supervision to keep the boys and girls separate during their stay at the hotel. Grace's mom, I called her Mrs. Conahan but she constantly corrected me, wanting to be referred to as Joanne, was not completely comfortable around my family, but she had gotten to know Carlisle and Esme from picking Grace up at our house and graciously agreed to help out.

I lounged around the house for the rest of the morning until Alice and Jasper came back, Alice carrying a box tied with a big bow. "Presents! And mine is first!"

The rest of the family came into the room to see what Alice's excitement was about.

I lifted out of the box a black strapless cocktail dress with a sweetheart bodice and layers of chiffon accented with two large crystals at the empire waistline.

"Alice, it's...stunning. But, I have a dress." Everyone was supposed to wear white and I had found the perfect dress last time we went shopping in Portland.

"I didn't want to spoil everything for you, but this is a _white _party. White for everyone else but _you, _the guest of honor."

My mom groaned. This would be a complete nightmare if she was in my shoes, just the thought of it would probably give her a panic attack.

"It's custom made for you," Alice grinned.

"Custom by who?" I narrowed my eyes.

"It's by whom. And it was just a friend," Alice rolled her eyes up to the ceiling.

"What's this friend's name?" I was now tapping my foot but at the same time I was holding lovingly on to the dress.

Alice mumbled something incoherent.

"I didn't hear you."

"James Mischka," she repeated more clearly. James Mischka as in Badgley Mischka. I should know by now that Alice probably has most of the major designers on speed dial.

I sighed. The dress was amazing and I just couldn't be anything but happy. "Thank you Alice... and Jasper." I grinned, knowing Jasper really had nothing to do with it.

"Me! Me! Me next!" Emmett jumped up and down with an envelope in his hand.

Inside was just a single piece of paper that read:

AN ESCAPE FROM ASTORIA  
You are graciously invited to the home of Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale for a weekend getaway from the crazy family.  
Happy Birthday Squirt!

The last line was written in Emmett's chicken scratch, but the rest was Rosalie's perfect script.

I couldn't stop laughing as I passed it on to my parents. Soon the entire room was full of giggles. "It's a great present you guys, thank you."

My parents gave me an acoustic guitar and Carlisle and Esme gifted me with an electric piano that would let me record my music. "It's _yours," _Esme emphasized, "although I'm sure you'll be fight with Edward over it." My dad looked absolutely giddy.

I thought by now Jacob would have shown up, but he hadn't. Our relationship had gone back to normal within a week of my date with Marcus, but it wasn't as comfortable as it used to be. I wasn't sure how to act around him anymore, knowing that I did have stronger feelings for him. I had watched my thoughts extra carefully around my dad, and I was under the impression I was doing a decent job since I was positive he would have flipped out if he knew. Sometimes I really thought Jake was looking at me in a different way, the way I wanted him to see me, but I was sure that was only my imagination running away with me.

"Oh, Renesmee," my dad added, "we almost forgot." He tossed something up in the air and they landed easily in my fingers.

The keys to my bike.

"I'm sorry that you won't be able to get your license until Monday, but after that you're free from the horribly bindings of me and your mother."

"This birthday is amazing already!" I skipped around the room jingling the keys.

"If you don't think we can top this, there is really one more surprise..." My mom walked over to open the front door and standing on the porch was Audrey, flanked by Benjamin and Tia.

"Audrey!" We met each other halfway and embraced. "I can't believe this!"

My relationship with Audrey started out rocky. She was a hybrid like I was, but with many more human characteristics. She had wanted to be changed completely, something that truly offended me because I have always been so happy with who I am. After much debate my family agreed, only to find out Audrey had since changed her mind. I'd like to give myself the credit for that, a conversation we had privately that neither of us have ever repeated.

"You're hair is _short!_" I touched her brown hair that was now above her shoulders, quite a departure from her previously long, wavy, hair.

"We don't have access to blow dryers... it's easier this way," she winked.

I looked at her clothes; torn jeans, sneakers, and a long sleeve shirt that had seen better days. If Alice wasn't already thinking about it, I would suggest later that Audrey raid our closets for a new wardrobe. I couldn't imagine being a nomad, but that is the path she wanted. Benjamin and Tia had been living in Colorado when they first met her, and they've since gone back and found a pseudo-house. I had never seen it, but from what Audrey described it was more like a cave that they built a front wall to. It was deep in the mountains and no one ever notice it.

"So Alice," Audrey turned. "Where's my dress?"

"You're coming?" I gasped.

"Of course I am!" Alice was already handing her a white garment bag.

"Benjamin? Tia?"

The tall dark haired boy laughed. "We may be civilized, but we don't have the control that we envy so much in your family. It will be a few too many humans in a confined space for us."

That was understandable. I thought back to how hard it was when Marcus cut himself and I hadn't had human blood, donated human blood, since I was a baby.

"Time to go change!" Alice shuffled us off to my bedroom.

I had started to lay out my outfit on the bed when Audrey stopped me. "I want to give you your present first!" She pulled a box out of her bag.

"Audrey, you really shouldn't have!" Audrey worked at a coffee shop, not making much money, just enough for the essentials.

"It's really nothing, trust me," she handed me the white box. "It's just an overly sappy friendship bracelet. I have one too." She showed me her wrist where a white leather cord attached to a metal plate that had _forever _scripted on it. The one in the box matched except the inscription said _friends._

"Audrey it's perfect!"

"I don't think you're getting dressed!" Alice called from the living room. "I still need to do your hair and makeup!"

The ride to Portland wasn't nearly as long as it would be for the rest of my guests. No one in my family obeyed the speed limit, and with my dad's built in radar detector he had never gotten a single traffic ticket. When we got to the loft and took the elevator to the top floor Alice put her hands over my eyes until we were in the middle of the room.

It was breathtaking. As promised, the entire place was decked out in white, except for the rich wood floors and pale green and yellow floral arrangements. The windows were delicately decorated with white gossamer, and at one end of the room I saw a long table full of sweets and treats, including my cake, and all of them were in fact some shade of white.

"Alice this is remarkable!"

Alice nodded approvingly. "Yes, I would say so."

Grace and Mrs. Conahan-Joanne-were the only ones there so far. Joanne was a very interesting woman. For such a small town resident she sure enjoyed pampering herself. Her dyed blonde hair was always perfectly permed, I was never without a full face of makeup, and her nails were pristinely manicured. She had never been married although Grace's father lived in Tacoma and they were on good terms. She was a teacher at the middle school, but one would first guess she was a typical stay at home upper class suburban housewife. Of course, that would also mean she would cook and clean, neither of which she did.

"Happy birthday darling!" She gave me one of those half-hearted don't-wrinkle-my-dress hugs. She was definitely decked out wearing a long white dress even though everyone else wore cocktail dresses. She had her hair up in a twist with a silver comb holding it in place. My family was pretty sure that the Cullen status in the community was one of her top incentives for putting up with our odd family.

Grace, a miniature copy of her mother, handed me gift bag. I really hated presents from my friends, mainly because I didn't need anything else. For each of my birthdays which Alice and Esme were insistent on celebrating I normally donated the toys and clothing to charity. The worst birthday had to be my "tenth" birthday, and the only year I was actually in middle school for. They held my party at a Build-A-Bear workshop. I had never owned a stuffed animal in my life and my faux friends squealed over their products. I got scolded for pouting in the corner.

Grace and her mom though, already knowing that between our family of nine, owned every material thing sold in the continental United States, gave me a gift certificate for a spa. I immediately decided I would bring Audrey. She deserved it.

"Oh thank you!" I hugged them both again. It was nice to have people outside of my family really know me.

Little by little my friends and friends-by-association filed into the loft, all of their eyes completely overwhelmed with the extravagant decor. I was handed envelops and gift bags, presents wrapped in silver and white keeping with the theme. When the chandeliers came on it really made the entire room glow. My family stood together, as usual, all of them looking like Gods and Goddesses. I looked at Bella, Esme, Alice, and Rosalie noticing the completely different styles they all had with their dresses. We were all so unique.

"Hey Nessie." Marcus gave me a half smile and leaned in for a hug which I gladly returned. We were still trying to get past the awkwardness of the failed date, but it was a work in progress.

I introduced Marcus to Audrey, who had been hovering around me not knowing anyone, while I opened Marcus' present. It was a key chain engraved with my initials.

"Figured you'd use it a lot, even if I think the idea of your bike is absolutely ridiculous and dangerous."

"You'll have to watch me ride sometime; it'll put your worries to rest."

My attention was immediately diverted to the doorway. It was impossible to miss him when he walked in. He was wearing white slacks, white shirt and a white and baby blue tie. The contrast against his dark skin made him just as handsome as my perfect family, who were normally incomparably gorgeous to anyone else in the room. I swallowed hard. Audrey's hand reached for my back letting me know she saw him too. She was the only one who I had talked to about my feelings for Jake.

I saw him stop at me, and look me up and down. He gave me a huge grin and in seconds was picking me up in a hug. "Happy Sweet Sixteen, Nay," he whispered in my ear. "Hope you're getting everything you wished for."

Almost everything.

The room was crowded within the hour and for most of the night everyone was on the dance floor, barely stopping to eat the delicious food-all white of course. Alice had labored over the menu and I could tell it disappointed her a little.

The music slowed and couples broke off to dance. "Do I get to dance with the birthday girl?" My dad extended his hand.

"What about Bella?" I couldn't call her mom here.

He looked over at Bella who waved back at us. "Graceful or not, Bella has _never _liked to dance. But don't worry, she'll be out soon enough."

While he twirled me around the dance floor, a century worth of practice behind his moves, I saw my mom dancing with Jacob, talking quietly. Over the music and other murmurs I couldn't hear what they were saying.

There was a tap on my back and my mom stood there in her chiffon dress, smiling sweetly. "Mind if I cut in? I think I need to stake my claim; too many onlookers," she teased.

"I can take the dance from here." Jacob was taking my hand before I could decide for myself.

He wasn't as skilled as my dad so we slowed down to a simple rock back and forth. "I have a present for you…sorry I couldn't make it to the house before hand."

"That's all right." I couldn't look at him, because I was afraid what my emotions may cause me to do.

"You look absolutely beautiful, by the way, in case no one has told you. All grown up."

Yup, still his little sister, but I blushed anyway. "Thanks."

For the rest of the party I kept a distance from him, my heart burning every time he looked at me. I danced with my friends, and even had a slow danced with Marcus. The evening turned to night and Esme gathered everyone to walk over to the neighboring hotel.

We had the top floor and played music throughout the suites. Staff had brought up extra cots, blankets, and pillows to accommodate the extra guests, while everyone else jumped on the beds and goofed off. There were more sweets and snacks in each of the rooms and the eating and dancing continued.

I went down to the car, realizing I forgot my overnight bag, and Jake followed me out.

"Hey Nessie, wait up!"

His tie was now off and his shirt untucked, with the first few buttons undone. That when Jake looked his best; rugged.

" I didn't get a chance to give you your present earlier." He was looking down, playing with the stones that made up the walkway.

"It's all right," I muttered.

"Well, here." He practically threw the small box at me, but I caught it without blinking.

Inside nestled on a piece of fluff was a silver necklace with a round charm. The charm was etched with a quote: _A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words._

I wanted to cry. Partially because it was a beautiful saying, and the necklace itself was beautiful, but more so because it said friend. My heart was tearing at that word. I never thought I wouldn't _want _to be friends with Jake. I mean, I did, but I wanted more.

"Thank you, Jake, it's wonderful." I smiled, but my words still wavered when I spoke, trying to contain my emotions.

"Yeah, Nay, I-," he stopped and sighed, "-you're welcome." When he leaned into me my heart picked up its paced, but he just hugged me uncomfortably. When he pulled away for a split second I thought he really _saw _me, but then it was gone.

I walked back towards the front doors of the hotel, trying my best to wait until I found Audrey before I broke down, but Jake grabbed my hand and pulled me back to him. "Monday afternoon after your driver's test. We have a date right?"

"A- a date?" My heart raced again.

"I told you _how_ long ago that you would be taking your first ride with _me?_ Remember?"

I remembered, but that was before when we were just us. "Yeah. I'll call you when I get home. Unless I fail of course." Joking around with him made me feel better.

"Very funny." He poked me in the side "Let's go and see what kind of trouble your friends have gotten into already."

"You don't need to stay, Jake. I know we're all kind of young for you."

"I'll go bug Edward and Bella so you young'uns can do your thing." He ruffled my hair like he always does when he thinks I'm being cute.

I had to find Audrey.

"You go ahead, Audrey uh-" _lie, Nessie, lie_ "-text messaged me. She's coming down. Wants girl talk."

"Uh huh…" He didn't sound like he believed me, but left me alone anyway.

It took less than a minute for Audrey to come outside after I called her. She was holding a fruity looking drink in her hand, sipping on the contents. It smelled very sweet, but lacked any alcohol. Brandon and Ethan had tried to be sly and sneak in a bottle of vodka, but unfortunately their plan was spoiled since my entire family could smell the contents of the liquor within moments of it being in the room.

She was bouncing her head from side to side, the music from upstairs still in her ears. Her face dropped when I started to bawl.

"Nessie! Nessie, what is it?"

I couldn't talk, just handed her the necklace. She would understand without me having to explain.

"Nessie, I-," she handed the gift back to me, "-don't know what to say. I don't know how it feels to be in your position. Can't you just _talk _to him about it?"

"And what? Ruin our entire friendship? Seven years of being best friends would go down the drain if he found out that I have a major crush on him! I'm the equivalent to his little sister! My parents wouldn't leave me alone with him for one second!"

There wasn't anything Audrey could do. There wasn't anything anyone could do. Why did this have to happen to me?

"Let's go back upstairs." Audrey's body temperature was only slightly warmer than my family's and it felt good on my hot skin when she took my hand. I pulled away anyway.

"I think I need to sit out here a while longer. Gather my thoughts."

Audrey reluctantly went back inside without me, and I walked down the stone path to the pool. It was illuminated from under the water with florescent lights making the water glow a bright aqua blue. I slipped off my shoes and lowered my legs into the water which was surprisingly warm. Small waves lapped at my legs, the lights making white peaks when it got too close to my fair skin. I knew Alice would have a fit if I did any damage to the dress, but I laid back against the brick ground that surrounded the pool and looked up at the stars. They weren't nearly as bright here with the light pollution from the city.

"Hey Squirt."

Emmett appeared out of nowhere and sat down next to me.

"Don't you want to enjoy your own party?"

"Not really in the mood." I kicked my legs in the water making ripples. The necklace was still in my hand, my fist tightly around it.

"Boy problems?"

I turned bright red. "Why-why would you think that?"

He looked up at the stars for a moment, his mouth turning half up as he thought. "Well, you and Marcus seemed to be all good... and now you're both a little awkward around each other. Just thought boy problems would be it." That was an obvious observation; too obvious for even Emmett to mention.

"I just want this one boy to like me."

"Nessie, I don't know a single guy on this planet that wouldn't be head over heels for you." Emmett and I had never had this type of conversation before, but I felt strangely comforted by it.

_I can name one, _I thought.

"Maybe you need to be more upfront about it. You can either make the first move or wait for him, but let me give you a secret about guys" -he leaned over with a smirk on his face- "we're complete scaredy cats when it comes to admitting we like a girl."

I got the feeling he knew I wasn't talking about Marcus or else he would have most likely had some type of reference to how my dad fell for my mom when she was human.

"Thanks, Em."

"Now let's get back upstairs and start a pillow fight!" He threw me on his back regardless of my protesting and took me back to my party.

It wasn't until after two in the morning did people start to pass out from exhaustion. Audrey and I claimed one of the beds and talked quietly about my failed date with Marcus, about her job and living with Tia and Benjamin. She was practically in mid-sentence when her eyes got heavy and she fell asleep. There was nothing else for me to do, unless I wanted to go hunt down my family, which I didn't feel like doing. I took my mind off of everything Jacob by thinking about my license on Monday and finally getting my bike. The happy thoughts relaxed me and I could feel my anxiety disappear as everything got dark.

One second I was in the hotel bed next to Audrey, the sterile scent of the comforter the only thing I could smell, the next I was again in the same run-down building with the same man-Ramses-standing feet from me. The heat took me by such surprise it flooded my throat and whirled around in my lungs, cutting off my oxygen for a moment.

"Dear Child, please don't leave this time. It isn't safe. Please listen to me. Please." Ramses reached towards me but I stepped back. I was against a wall, the doorway from last night was on the opposite side of the room. I wouldn't be able to out run him.

This was just a dream. I don't need to do anything he says, he can't hurt me.

The Egyptian chuckled and rubbed at the scruff that was growing on his chin. "You don't really think this is a dream, do you?"

_Wake up! Wake up! _I was about to run myself into a wall to see if, like last time, it would wake me up, but I stood in place. "Fine. What am I doing here?"

"I need you to come here!" He waved his hand towards the door. "You _must _come to Alexandria. You _must _bring your parents. You, Renesmee, are the key to our destiny."

Destiny. My mother was so fond of that word while I was beginning to despise it. "I must have this stupid prophecy stuck so far down inside me that I can't do anything but dream about it."

"I wish I could convince you otherwise." Ramses then grinned, a gleam appeared in his burgundy eyes"I am really sorry about what I'm about to have to do..."

The dirt floor of the building blew up dust in all directions as the vampire pounced at me, and I lost sense of which way was up just long enough to feel a stinging pain on my forearm. Out of instinct I clutched it to me and jumped back. Ramses was blocking the doorway, his face not fierce regardless of the attack, but almost ashamed.

"I truly apologize for that, but you have to believe me. You have to." He outstretched his hand again even though he was way too far away to reach and I felt myself falling backwards. I never did hit the ground, but instead the bed was under me once again. The air was cool, the sheets were rough.

Audrey had pulled a blanket and pillow and was sleeping on the ground; I must have been restless. That's when I saw the tall dark figure in the doorway.

"Nay? Are you all right?" Jake's deep voice asked. In only a few long legged strides he was sitting on the bed.

I shook my head trying to regain my place and time. "Ever question how real a dream is?"

We were whispering so low that the only one who had a chance of hearing us was Audrey, but I could hear the steady sound of her sleeping heart. Her pulse made me find my own and I followed it from my heart through my entire body, until it reached my arm. It was so strong there, and I reached with my other hand to touch the soreness that I could now feel, but it met something wet instead.

"Oh my God." Jake was the one speaking. He scooped me up and rushed me into the hallway. I was in shock. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak, I could just stare.

He barely whispered and my family appeared out of their rooms, all of them staring at the same thing I was.

Down the length of my forearm, the exact arm I had clutched in my dream, the exact same place that Ramses had clawed at, was a clean slice of open flesh. Rich red blood beat its way out of my body and was staining both of our shirts. Jake didn't care, he just held me closer.

I was whisked into another room, a towel was being applied to my wound. I could feel the pain now and whimpers were leaving my lips, but nothing else.

"We need to stop the bleeding," Carlisle said calmly. Yes, please make it stop. Please. I could feel everything getting fuzzy, which wasn't a good sign.

"What happened?" My dad lashed out at Jake.

"Seriously? You want to blame this on me?" Jake was still holding me, now we were sitting on one of the beds together. "She was thrashing in bed, woke up looking really spooked and asked me... she asked if I ever questioned how real a dream is."

The dream. Ramses apologized, but he said I needed to believe. I wanted to tell them but the blood loss made me too dizzy to form words.

"She's clotting now. She's fine." Carlisle changed the towel on my arm.

"I don't understand how this could happen? She has vampire skin. The only thing that could break through that is..." It was Rosalie's voice who broke.

My dad finished her thought. "Another vampire."

**Any theories on Ramses? Everyone going crazy about Nessie and Jake being too chicken to come clean about their feelings? I know there isn't a second POV for this chapter but it was over 5300 words, the longest I've ever written by far. I really want to make Nessie seem more assimilated into the real world, proof that she can live in both.**


	9. Lost and Found: Renesmee

All Characters © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Make sure to read both POVs.

**Chapter 5 - Lost and Found**

_Renesmee_

I was groggy the next morning when I woke up. Seeing the bandage around my arm, and remembering what happened made me sick to my stomach. Everyone else was up and packing their bags, hugging me as they went to their cars to finish their Sunday in Astoria.

Sometime while I slept Audrey must have found out about what happened because she didn't question my arm when I put a long sleeve shirt on to hide the evidence. "Sorry I kicked you out of bed," I apologized.

"Ha, no worries," she replied, but I could tell by her expression that she was wary.

No one would let me help with a single thing. Once again I was being treated like Renesmee; the breakable half human. I saw Jake in the parking lot standing at his car, looking at me. I hadn't gotten a chance to thank him, or at least talk to him about last night. His look was one of longing, but he made no effort to call me over so I quietly got into my dad's car instead.

I passed back out almost immediately after getting on the highway, but this time I had no dreams of Ramses. I was now beginning to believe my dream villain - that it wasn't really a dream. You can't get hurt in a dream.

Either my dad or Emmett carried me into my bedroom, but I was too tired to really care. My soft bed was much more comfortable than the one at the hotel. I knew they were talking about me in the living room, but my body gave in and I slept soundly for the first time that weekend. Thankfully, I had no more travels to Egypt.

It was still light when I woke up, but the sun was shining through my window as it does in the mornings.

"Holy crow!" I jumped out of bed. I had slept all day and through the night-it was Monday morning.

I wasn't even sure which clothes I had thrown on because I realized my appointment at the DMV was in a half an hour. I had taken a very trivial motorcycle training course required by Oregon law as soon as I had my driving permit. I couldn't get a permit or license for a motorcycle until I was 16, which was yesterday. Today I would get my license to drive a car, and the endorsement to legally ride a bike.

"Happy belated birthday!" Everyone was in the living room.

"I can't believe I slept through my birthday! Where's Audrey?"

"I'm here," she came out of the kitchen, "I was about to wake you up, we need to head home."

Audrey was the closest thing to a sister that I would ever have. "I don't know what I'd do without you," I whispered.

"Ditto."

The farewell seemed too go by all too quickly, and within minutes there was no trace of Audrey and her coven near our home. My disappointed was soon forgotten when Jake walked through the door.

"Ready?" He held my riding helmet under his arm.

Carlisle was taking me because legally, he was my guardian. Jake drove his bike and my mom followed on mine so I would be able to drive out of the DMV with it. I was pleased that there were no qualms about me leaving the office with Jake.

The sun that had woken me up earlier in the morning hadn't yet hidden behind any clouds and I was nervous as we drove through town seeing Carlisle's skin sparkling through the windshield, that we'd have to turn around.

"Alice had us make the appointment at 10:30 for a reason," Carlisle said out of the blue, catching me staring at his crystal-like face.

I trusted Alice's foresight and looked back out of the tinted window of the Mercedes. I could still feel my pulse strongly in my arm, and every once in a while I was afraid it was bleeding again, but I was panicking over nothing; the wound was healed quickly. I had a theory about Ramses, but I wasn't sure who would take me seriously enough to listen through the entire explanation. My dad would surely cut me off, and Carlisle would probably dissect it to no end. Maybe Bella would know how to present it to the others? I pressed down on my forearm, wincing from the soreness. It was silly, but I had been doing it all morning just to make sure it actually happened.

Sure enough when we pulled up to the DMV at 10:20 the clouds swarmed the sky like a hive of bees and a slow drizzle began to fall. I really didn't know what we would do without Alice. We all ran inside, escaping the raindrops, and sat down in the large waiting area of the office. Bella and Carlisle sat one row over from where Jake took a seat, and I chose to sit next to him.

"Jake, about last night..." I decided we needed to talk about it.

"You scared the hell out of me, you know." He leaned in and I could smell the mixture of leather interior and pine from his clothes. "There was a lot of blood. I don't think I've been so afraid since Bella almost died giving birth to you."

I lowered my voice hoping that Carlisle and Bella wouldn't hear us, but they both looked occupied with magazines, and the commotion of the people around us made it quite noisy. "Can I tell you something? You'll tell me if I'm crazy right?"

"I have no problem telling you if you're crazy," he said, grinning.

"I was attacked in my dream," I blurted out, quickly glancing over to my grandfather and mother to see if they had heard, but they didn't even flinch. "This man, Ramses, he kept calling me the prophet's child-you know, like the Russians said. He said I needed to bring my parents to Egypt. He apologized after he attacked me, and said I needed to believe this wasn't a dream."

Jake just sat there, his face unmoving except for his eyes blinking and a twitch in his cheek.

"Jake? Jacob? Say something!"

"I don't think you're crazy. I... I actually thought something similar."

"Please don't tell anyone, they _will_ think I'm crazy. They already think I'm going to split in two one of these days." I was begging like a child and Jake was looking very amused.

"They won't-well they don't-think you're crazy. I already talked to them about my theory-something similar to yours. Carlisle is trying to reach that vampire in Alaska, the one who worked with the Italian guys." I had to giggle at Jake's vampire references. Eleazar was a member of the Denali clan and his gift let him identify the abilities of other vampires. The "Italian guys" were the Volturi, whom Eleazar worked for until he met his mate Carmen.

"You would think by now you'd have some of their names down," I teased, and subconsciously reached and grabbed his arm, pulling him closer to me. For the first time neither of us pulled away awkwardly, and we let our shoulders staying touching, our arms almost linked around each other.

"You need to talk to Carlisle and your parents about this," he said seriously. "I – well, we - can't stand to see you get hurt like that again. If this man can hurt you, it could have been much worse."

"Let me think about all this _after _I gain some freedom. Can we ride all the way to Portland? We can go see Rose and Emmett and obnoxiously honk outside of their house!"

"I actually have another birthday present for you, so no, we won't be going to Portland today."

Before I could ask what it was, the woman behind the tall counter called me name. I had deducted that no one who worked for any government run agency was ever very nice, and Tina, the woman behind the counter, was no exception. She had dull brown hair-no dimension whatsoever to it-and it looked like she hadn't taken a brush to it in days. Her skin was wrinkled and blotchy even though it was caked with cheap foundation, and her eyes had more eye shadow and mascara on them than I use in a year. The neon yellow and green that blended over her eyelid almost made me laugh; she looked like a clown except for the frown stuck on her face. I handed her the certificate that would allow me to drive a motorcycle, and my paperwork to take my behind the wheel test driving test.

"And what car will you be taking your test in?"

I gulped. I should have borrowed one of Jacob's less flashy cars. The instructors would probably fail me just because I was driving a Mercedes-the only Mercedes in all of Astoria that I was aware of. Carlisle handed her the insurance information on his car, eying me apologetically.

"A Mercedes?" The woman flashed a rude and sarcastic smile at us. I was losing my patience and wanted to point out the smear of bright red lipstick that had rubbed off on her teeth, but I refrained.

"It's not mine," I quickly added. "I wish!" Hoping my semi-teenage whine would make me look less spoiled, but _Tina _didn't buy it. By then I was pretty sure she knew us by our last name already, Carlisle being a well known doctor and our family being one of the wealthiest in town.

"Take a seat, you'll be called up by an instructor when it's your turn to bring your car around," she said curtly and shoved the paperwork back at me.

"How rude!" I huffed and sat down on the seat next to Jake with _thump. _"Jealousy. Hmph!"

"Shouldn't have brought the Mercedes, huh?"

"Is it too late for you to go get one of your cars?" I pleaded.

"Cullen, Renesmee?" A tall lanky man called from the door.

"Too late," Jake smiled. "Good luck... not that you need it but, you know."

I had butterflies in my stomach even though I knew I had nothing to worry about. I played with the car keys between my fingers, trying to think of something to say to the man walking at my side.

"Too bad the sun didn't stay out," I said, brightly.

The blank face of the instructor turned up in a smile and there was a little bit of happiness in his eyes. "Sunshine would have been nice, yes." He stopped in front of the car and looked me up and down, and then to the car. "Mercedes CL?"

"It's my...Dad's," I stuttered. Dad was easier to say than adoptive father, even though it hurt a little to think of anyone else but Edward. "I'll probably be stuck with one of my siblings' old cars."

"I didn't know the Cullens owned any old cars." He was being sarcastic, but still friendly.

_Note to self, change your last name._

"Are you ready to wow me, Ms. Cullen?" He opened the driver's side door for me and I jumped in.

Hank, the instructor, had marveled at my skills behind the wheel and thanked me for a wonderful ride, wishing me luck with one of the _old cars _I'd have to be stuck with_. _It seemed to take years before my license was finalized, again faced with Tina's abrasive attitude.

"And congratulations," she sneered, handing me a temporary license, my real one to come in the mail. "That's your driver's license and this is the endorsement for your motorcycle." She sounded disgusted and turned to Carlisle. "It is none of my business Dr. Cullen, but for a sixteen year old girl to have access to a motorcycle seems extremely inappropriate and reckless."

"You're right-," he looked down at her name tag, "-Tina, it is none of your business." Carlisle put his hand on my back and led me outside to where Jake and my mom were waiting. I didn't believe I'd ever seen Carlisle be so abrupt to someone before.

"Congratulations driver!' Jake picked me up in a big hug. Before I could blink he had my helmet and keys in his hands.

"See you at home," my mom called out the window of the Mercedes as Carlisle got behind the wheel.

I could see Tina through the window of the DMV glaring at me. I grinned widely back at her as I put on the helmet and straddled my bike. The keys almost shook in my hand as they found the ignition and my bike came to life. I had ridden my mom's bike, albeit illegally, but the rule was that this one was to be saved for post-license-. It was the first time I had ever felt the roar of the exhaust under me.

"The garage, okay?" Jake called already kicking his bike into gear. I nodded and did the same, driving off behind him.

I wanted to take off my helmet in the worst way, but if I got a ticket for driving without one, I would surely get my new prize possession taken away from me. The Cullens were law-abiding citizens (besides the occasional falsified documents necessary to blend in). I at least raised my visor, the wind whipping at my face. I glanced down to see the road being eaten out from under my bike, all of it yards behind us before I could count to ten. We turned heads as we raced through town, which was mainly empty because it was noon and people were either at work or school. The tree line jumped in front of us, fantastic blurs of neutral browns and bright fall shades of orange and yellow whirled by us, yet I could still pick out every single leaf.

We both skidding to a stop outside of the garage, Jake's part-time job when he wasn't in class. His boss and the owner, Jamie, came out to see what the noise was all about.

"Oh my God that was amazing!" I pulled my helmet off, my heart pounding in my ears and the adrenaline flowing through my blood. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Who are you thanking?" Jake laughed.

"No idea!"

Jamie greeted Jake with a handshake and waved at me. He was a little older than Jake, who was finally 24 in both years and looks, and a little rough around the edges, but nice enough. Well, anyone would be nice to me once they learned whose Jake's connections were with. Rosalie and my mom were both into vintage cars, and the work they paid Jake and Jamie for immediately softened Jamie up to my constant hanging around during the summer months when I wasn't in school.

"So, you passed?"

"Very funny," I stuck my tongue out at him. "Now you're going to need to deal with me _after school _too."

"Careful, I'll start putting you to work!"

I had what was probably the opposite reaction he thought I would have. "Really?" I shrieked.

"Now you've done it, you just offered her a job without even knowing it!" Jake groaned and put up the kickstand to his bike.

"Why would you even want a job, kid? Ain't your family loaded?"

I narrowed my eyes and growled low in my throat. Jake heard me but Jamie couldn't. "Jamie, enough," Jake grunted.

"We'll see," Jamie brushed the offer off and walked back inside. "And those bikes are behind the garage!"

"Bikes?" I looked at Jacob.

"Thanks a lot for spoiling it!" Jake snapped, but Jamie was already inside. He turned back to me and smirked. "The cat is out of the bag, let's go."

I beat him to the garage and raced around it. There, like twins, were two red off road bikes, all shiny and perfect. "No! Way!" I accented each word. My body hadn't even calmed down from the first ride and it was now in overdrive.

"Paved roads get boring." hHe was grinning from ear to ear, happy with my reaction. "That new bike of yours can't handle the dirt, so I felt these were in order."

I inspected them more closely and frowned. "Jake, these are _way _too expensive. Are you joking? You can't afford these!"

"Shows how much you know about my financial status." I knew he was lying, but I didn't want to call him out and hurt his feelings. "Besides, if you think _I'm _going to stick to the streets then you don't know me very well."

Off roading in the woods was even better than the road. This bike was smaller than my own, but more agile making the ditches and jumps on the broken dirt paths easy to maneuver. The rain had stopped, but left the ground muddy, spraying us with every landing. We had left our helmets behind, no one would see us out here, and it felt ten times better without one on.

Everything was absolutely perfect until Jake had called to me. I was so wrapped up in myself I didn't hear what he had said and for the instant I turned my attention to him my bike hit a ditch hidden under dead leaves and flipped me head over heels. I landed on my feet, completely unharmed, and even brought the bike down next to me, leading it gently with one hand. It barely bounced when the wheels touched.

I bowed theatrically, but by the time Jake got to me his face was fierce and upset. "That is so not funny!"

"What? You didn't like my acrobatics?" I got back on the bike.

"You could have hurt yourself, Nay," he hissed, and then his face fell. "I'm sorry for distracting you, it really is my fault."

"Nothing is anyone's fault, Jake. Me falling off of this bike wouldn't be any different than falling into a feather bed and you know it." He sighed and that's when I saw him looking down at my arm. "That is different. Don't you go on the overprotective crusade also, please?"

"Sorry, instinct," he shrugged. He had leaned his bike against a tree and walked over to me. Both of our faces were covered in mud, and he took the sleeve of his shirt and wiped mine down. I prayed that he would mistake the racing heart for the excitement of the ride.

I was getting lost at the way he was looking at me, but my senses kicked in and I could smell something-_someone. _

"There's someone out here," I whispered.

"I know you can smell humans better than I can, but they must be pretty far away if I can't pick up the scent."

"Did you hear that?" There was what seemed to be crying in the distance. _Someone is hurt!_ I was about to take off running at full speed but Jake was fast enough to stop me.

"We need to take the bikes, we can't just run through the forest with no explanation on how we got there!"

He was right and we both took off, Jake following my lead. The pseudo-path that we had been riding on had long since disappeared, and I was concentrating on the rough terrain under us, trying to find any flat surface to land on when I had to. I couldn't imagine the panic attack Jake must have been having watching me. The area began to get too rocky and we were a good two miles away from where I heard first heard the cry for help.

"We _have _to go on foot, Jake."

He hesitated but ultimately agreed. "Just be _careful, _Nay." I wanted to snap at him again, of all the ridiculous worries he could have, but he said it in such earnest I gave him one nod of understanding.

He must have offered me his hand a dozen times on the climb over the jagged rocks, and I sucked in my breath every time and gave him what he wanted. The cries were getting louder, and the scent getting stronger. I could hear the human's erratic heartbeat and labored breathing.

"Jake!" I pointed to where there was an opening between the rocks. "In there!"

It was one more short climb until we could see down into the cavern and sure enough, there was a twenty foot drop where the rocks had split. "Are you all right down there?"

"Hello?" A man called back. "Hello?"

"Yes, we can hear you! I'm going to come down there, all right?" Jake tested out the stability of the rocks around the opening.

"Jake, let me go, I have more medical knowledge that you do." I had spent endless hours studying Carlisle's medical books since I was very young, yet Jake still looked at me in shock. "Jacob, you know I'll be fine, please just trust me!" I handed him my phone. "Run back until you can get some service and call for help."

"Can't we just go in there and get him out? I'll lift him up, you can pull him."

"And explain the rescue how?" I shook my head. "We don't even know his injuries."

Jake's face was blanch white, and his hand was gripped tightly over mine. "Renesmee?" He rarely ever called me by my full name, and only when he was being serious. "I _know _I'm being overprotective, but I wasn't kidding earlier. I would not be able to stand seeing you hurt again. Do you understand me? Promise me, just for my sake that you'll be careful."

I turned my hand so it was now holding his and squeezed it. "I promise."

He ran off closer to civilization and I lowered myself easily into the hole. My high capacity brain thought for a moment that I was probably going to have to explain how I got down her unscathed, the walls being too smooth to say I climbed down. About ten feet from the ground I relaxed my body so I would at least fall in front of the human. I threw off my riding jacket and ripped the bandage off of my arm, the cut still visible. I squeezed my eyes shut and ran my fingernail down the scabbed over wound. It immediately reopened and once again began to bleed. _Jake and Edward are going to kill me for this. _It would be a good fake injury though.

"Hello?" the man choked.

"Sir, we're going to get help. Please, tell me where you're hurting." He didn't need to tell me. His leg was looking very unleg-like with the way it was turned, and definitely broken. I tore open his shirt and he shivered. I forgot that it was probably cold out. His entire torso was bloody and bruised, and there was a large gash down his side. I ripped his shirt off the rest of the way and held it against his side; he was exposed all the way down to the muscle. I grabbed my jacket and put it over him.

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Nessie. What's yours?"

"Charlie."

"Charlie is my grandpa's name," I said, trying to smile. He looked nothing like Grandpa Charlie though. This Charlie was much younger, and definitely in better shape than my grandpa who preferred beer and fishing to any other type of physical activity. I wished I had something to clean up his face so I could see it better, but the sleeves of my shirt were both dirty and now bloody from my arm.

"You're bleeding…" He lifted a fragile hand. I noticed a few of the fingers looked dislocated.

"It's nothing. I'm a tough kid," I promised. I wasn't sure if his shaking was from the cold or shock, but I knew I had to keep him talking. "So, Charlie, what are you doing in Astoria?"

"From California," he said in halted speech. "Decided to visit up here, take in some hiking. Fell."

I learned over the next half an hour that Charlie was single, but had a ten year old little girl named Katie. He never enjoyed hiking, but he had recently gone on a fitness binge and lost almost seventy pounds. The seconds ticked by in my head as I listened for any sign of help coming our way, my mind going crazy trying to think of things to talk about while to keep Charlie's mind off of the pain.

Eventually my senses were getting weaker and I was becoming confused. "Nessie?" Charlie whispered.

"Hmm?"

"You're still bleeding."

I looked down at my shirt and sure enough, thought I had completely forgotten about my arm, the wound had yet to clot, and the entire sleeve of my light shirt was now rich with red blood. _I'm going to be in so much trouble for this. _"It's all right Charlie, help will be here soon."

Charlie answered me, yet my hearing was becoming fuzzy and I couldn't quite make out his words...


	10. Lost and Found: Bella

All Characters © Stephenie Meyer

**Chapter 5 - Lost and Found  
**_**Bella**_

"She isn't having any nightmares." Edward came quietly into the room followed by Carlisle and Esme. I was grateful that Renesmee slept the entire way home from Portland; none of us would know what to say to her. The entire time she slept, I just glancing back at her, just waiting for her to break. First the night terror and now this - she wasn't as indestructible as I thought.

"Do you think she did that to herself? In her sleep?" Esme was clutching Carlisle's arm.

The shock of seeing so much blood in the hotel made me feel almost human. I swear I could once again smell the rust that made me dizzy back in my mortal life. "It was too severe. The angle the cut was at would make it impossible for her to reach around and make it that deep, especially while sleeping." I demonstrated on myself, my arm having to be twisted awkwardly in order to mimic her injury.

"And Audrey isn't strong enough to break her skin," Carlisle added. "I'm completely at a loss I'm afraid."

Edward looked over at Jacob. "You know, you should start talking out loud, you do have some interesting theories sometimes."

Jake grumbled something about snooping. "_I _was thinking that we're going about this too rationally. She thought her dream was real..."

"So?" Jasper and Alice said in tandem as they joined us in the living room.

"_So _you're the experts on all things supernatural. Is it possible to get hurt in a dream? You all have some crazy powers, don't you?"

We all stood around stunned at Jacob's revelation. Carlisle and Edward were the only ones nodding at the possibility.

"That little menace from Italy-," he was referring to Jane, "-she doesn't really burn your head into a crisp right? It's all mental, but she can still kill you, right?"

Alice squeezed her eyes tightly trying to wrap her head around everything. "Let me get this straight. You're saying that someone is getting into Nessie's dreams and attacking her? That's ludicrous! Someone would be aware of a power like that!"

"Why would they be?" Jake challenged. "Vampires don't sleep."

"I think I need to make a call to Alaska..." Carlisle walked off to his study in a semi-dazed state.

I could tell Audrey was quite bored; Tia and Benjamin had left over the weekend to hunt out of state, something that still made my spine crawl. She wasn't only bored, but concerned for her friend. The rest of the family went to hunt, except for Jacob who sat in Renesmee's room without asking permission this time. None of us stopped him. Audrey couldn't hunt; she got a different toss of genetic pool and was not nearly as strong enough, and her skin wouldn't stand up to any larger animal.

"Why don't you go into our closets and pick out a couple new outfits, Audrey," I suggested.

She grimaced at me. "You know I don't like taking charity from your family."

"Well, that's too bad, because we like giving it. I had to get used to when I became a part of this family."

Audrey couldn't help herself when she saw the huge closets and soon became engrossed in the wardrobe possibilities. It gave me a chance to be a mother again and check in on my daughter. The door was open a crack and Jake had moved the chair that had been in the corner, closer to her bed. I could see the affliction in his body through the dark room, wanting in the worst way to touch her. He turned and looked over at me and I motioned for him to come outside.

"What?" He said in a low voice when he got to the living room and started to pace in front of the wall of windows.

"We need to finish our conversation; the one we started at the party."

"There isn't anything to finish, I'm just stuck," he said with a frown.

"You can't just sit here in limbo feeling sorry for yourself, Jacob."

"What if I ruin it? How can we just move from being practically siblings, to friends, to..." he was going to say lovers, but held his tongue.

"You're breaking her heart, Jake. Edward is a mess over it."

"Well, of course he is. Nay is a daddy's girl."

I shook my head. "Over both of you Jake. I know he seems protective of her, but your torment hurts him just as much. He may not admit it outright, but he does want you two to be together."

"That's a new one for the books," he huffed.

"I'm serious, Jacob."

He began to pace the window again, but every stir from Renesmee's room would freeze him in his tracks. "What will this do to you?"

"I have no idea, but it can't be worse than seeing two of the people I love most in this world in agony."

"I'm afraid."

I was afraid too, but I would never admit it. I loved Jacob, and although it has turned back into the perfect uncomplicated brotherly love that I always wanted, I had no idea what actually seeing them together would do to me. I could tell myself that it wouldn't make an ounce of difference, but I couldn't guarantee that, even after seven years. What I could guarantee is that Jake was no longer in love with me in any other way than being his future mother-in-law. __

That's so weird! I shook the craziness from my head.

"I love her." He was now at a whisper.

"Then tell her!"

He shook his head violently. "It's not the right time, not after what she's been going through. She needs her rest. She does," he said, defiantly.

"You're stalling," I pointed out.

He never answered, just got back up and went into my daughter's room, taking his rightful seat by her side. I wished she would wake up and see how he really felt about her, see how the way he was looking at her-like a blind man who saw the sun for the very first time-but this was up to them. The rest of the family had made a pact: no interference.

It was hours later when the rest of the family got back, and yet Jacob was still at Renesmee's bedsid. She had slept through the entire day and into the night so far. Edward for once didn't look annoyed over Jake's presence, and I was hoping him warming up to their inevitable relationship would make it easier for Jake to take the next step.

"Hello, beautiful." Edward came over and kissed me.

"Mmmm," was my only answer. "I do love it when you dazzle me." He had just fed so his eyes were the most brilliant topaz and they seemed even brighter against his dark hair and fair skin. My personal Adonis I always called him.

"I would hope so, it's only been seven years," he said with a smile, followed by a kiss on my forehead. He then rested his chin on my head and sighed. "He's in pain."

I knew immediately he was referring to Jake. "I talked to him about it, Edward, I there isn't anything we can do."

"Silly teenagers," he scoffed, ending the comment with a _hmph. _

Jake must have heard us because he came into the living room. "Can I crash on the couch tonight? I don't think I'll sleep a wink if I go home."

I was pretty sure Jake would soon enough be moving in with us, the stronger their connection got.

"Take Rose and Emmett's old room," Edward suggested, but Jake turned his face up in distaste. "Don't worry, we got a brand new bed when they left-no residual trace of them will be left over."

That pacified him and he dragged himself up the stairs. I heard him flop down on the bed and within minutes he was snoring. Audrey had already gone to bed, pulling out the sleeper sofa in the library. At least all those who had to sleep were sleeping.

Edward led me to our room and pulled me onto the bed with him. "I'm behaving," he praised himself.

"Yes, you are," I kissed him, "and I'm very proud of you. I do believe though, it isn't as hard for you to see them together as you let on. You want this as much as they do."

He sighed and pulled me into him as I inhaled his sun-honey-and-lilac scent. "Get out of my head," he joked.

"Our daughter will be legally allowed to leave the safety of this house in a few short hours, you know," I murmured.

"Don't remind me," he grumbled in reply.

"We're going to need to set ground rules," I sighed. It wasn't something I was looking forward to. "We can't have her gallivanting around Astoria whenever she wants to."

"We could set a curfew and probably just talk to Jake-she'll follow his example. She listens to him when he speaks, unlike us who I know she sometimes blocks out-or at least pretends to."

"Yeah, that would work."

"I will stand firm on one rule though," Edward voice sounded harsher. "_No sleepovers at Jake's place._"

I lifted myself up to his face. "That seems reasonable, but it probably won't be necessary until they both get over themselves."

We stopped talking about our daughter's love life then. It was almost impossible to think about anything else with Edward slowly taking off his clothes...

~~~

No one could bring themselves to wake Renesmee up on Monday morning even though her appointment at the DMV was slowly approaching. Jake had left early that morning to change and come back. He had asked permission months ago to take Nessie out on her first ride, and of course I agreed immediately, but Edward took a little more convincing. Jake also let us know he was getting off-road bikes for them, another thing Edward stiffened over, but no fall would hurt her and he knew it.

Frantically, Renesmee finally scurried from her room, anxious and excited about her test.

"Happy belated birthday!" we all yelled.

"I can't believe I slept through my birthday! Where's Audrey?"

"I'm here!" Audrey appeared in the room. "I was about to wake you up, we need to head home."

They hugged and I heard Nessie say under her breath, "I don't know what I'd do without you." I had cursed Audrey's entry into our lives at first, but now I see that she is one of the best things that could have happened.

As we all said our goodbyes to Benjamin, Audrey, and Tia, Jake walked through the door with Nessie's helmet under his arm.

"Ready?"

Nessie rode in the car with Carlisle, who was unfortunately her legal guardian. That was probably one of the things that would always burn me and Edward; we would never really be her parents to anyone but our family. I got to follow on her brand new bike, with Jake bringing up the rear on his. It had been ages since I had ridden, mainly because it was something special I shared with Jake, and I decided a while ago when I first saw things progressing, that I'd take a small step back from our close friendship. I forgot how much different riding was than just driving in a stupid car.

_Maybe I could start again..._

Luckily for the helmet, jacket, and gloves as we rode through town, my skin that would be crystallizing in the sunlight wasn't visible to the patrons we passed in the streets. Pulling up to the DMV the clouds were already moving in and I could smell the rain drifting our direction. I had differing opinions on my heightened sense of smell. The super amazing eyesight was one thing, but although I basked in the scents of Edward and Nessie, of flowers and rain, I also hated the stinging pain of disinfectant, hairspray, and above all-paint. If I could get nauseous that would do me in every time.

The office was no exception to the horrible smells. The padding on the seats in the waiting area was old and stale. I could smell mildew and mold that was probably hidden within the walls. Good thing we didn't get sick or else I'd probably be carrying around a bottle of hand sanitizer wherever we went.

Jake didn't sit with me and Carlisle. Nessie, who I could tell wanted to talk to him about Saturday night, sat next to him one row away. I busied myself with a magazine and between the talking of customers on their cell phones (even though the sign clearly stated for them to be turned off) and the employees behind the desks explaining tedious directions over and over again, I couldn't really hear their whispers anyway.

"Cullen, Renesmee," said an abrupt voice from the counter. I couldn't even imagine how Nessie was dissecting the woman. She had taken after Alice when it came to criticizing the style of others.

I saw them exchanging papers and caught the woman making reference to the Mercedes she would be taking her test in. None of us had even thought about the envious eyes that would be on a sixteen year old driving a hundred thousand dollar car.

After the paperwork with the woman was done, Renesmee stormed back over to Jake. _"How rude!"_ I heard her say. Before she could continue her rant though, the instructor called her name.

It wasn't a surprise when she returned not too much later, a smile on her face. Even though the woman at the counter was once again rude, she handed Renesmee her freedom finally, causing my daughter's brown eyes to light up. Jake was standing next to me and we both heard the last comment the employee spat at Carlisle. "_It is none of my business Dr. Cullen, but for a sixteen year old girl to have access to a motorcycle seems extremely inappropriate and reckless."_

Jake put his hand on my arm, knowing that I was beyond fuming at that moment. She was ultimately calling _me_ a poor parent, not Carlisle. But as always Carlisle calmly, yet firmly put her back in her place. _"You're right, Tina, it is none of your business."_

"Congratulations driver!' Jake hugged Nessie as we walked out the door and handed over her helmet and keys.

I got into the car with Carlisle and waved them off. "See you at home!"

We were quite a way home before either of us spoke. "You seemed to let her go pretty easily," Carlisle said. "I thought I would at least hear a _be safe._"

Carlisle got a kick out of my maternal instinct, probably because I was still a child myself to him. He may be a perpetual twenty three year old, but he had centuries of knowledge behind those golden eyes. "If you remember correctly, I pulled some idiotic stunts back in the day and at the time I wasn't invincible. I have no room to talk and I'm sure Jake would rat me out if I did."

My explanation entertained him and he laughed a bell-like laugh. "Good point, good point."

The afternoon went by quickly for not having much to do. We had all stay home from school not only because of Nessie's license but because the sun couldn't decide whether or not to stay behind the clouds. I mainly lounged around with Edward, only taking a short break to do some painting. It was odd that I hated the smell of paint, but when I was completely absorbed with my artwork I couldn't smell it at all.

"BELLA!" Alice screamed at the top of her lungs. No one ever screamed in this house which meant it was bad.

Alice was panting, Jasper rubbing her back trying to calm her down. "Carlisle, phone." Sure enough Carlisle's cell phone rang.

"Alice what did you see?" Edward was frantic. She must not have been thinking clearly so he couldn't read her thoughts. My first worry was that the Volturi had made another decision.

"I couldn't see Nessie because-well she was with Jake and I can't see him at all. I can see the absence of her if she's away from him and she is now. She is but she's with another man, but she's getting fainter. Something is wrong. I can't even see where she _isn't _anymore!"

Panic strangled me and I reached back in a desperate search for Edward's hand.

"That was Chief Mackabee," Carlisle came back in. "They got a call from Jacob, from Renesmee's phone, they found a hiker in trouble and Renesmee went to help him while Jake tried to make a call. The phone went dead but they think they have an idea where they are."

Carlisle wouldn't allow us to track them on foot, not with the entire police force of Astoria out there to see us. Emmett had left his ATV behind and Edward and I both ran to it before saying a word. I saw Alice and Jasper get onto Jasper's bike-the one Edward gave him way back in the days of Forks-and we all sped off hoping to catch scent of one of them or for Alice to have a vision on the way.

We had gone miles with no luck until Jake's wolfy scent stung my noise. Edward smelled it too and veered off in the direction. "Jacob! Nessie!" We all alternated calling out their names, knowing they would be able to hear us over a great distance.

I saw Jake appear out of the woods just as the side road we were on ended. He only looked at us for a second before taking off running; we were supposed to follow him. "Screw this damn machine!" It just wouldn't go fast enough and the terrain he was leading us into was getting impossible to ride on.

"Carlisle?" Edward held a walkie talkie to his mouth. "We're going on foot. If the police call we're about two miles east of the two-oh-two. We left the bikes at the Pipline and Scandinavian intersection."

Carlisle's voice crackled on the other end. "Not too fast, we have to stay under radar."

_But this is my daughter! _I wanted to scream at him.

It didn't take long before we got there, the search and rescue party was already calling out in the distance.

"Nay!" Jacob was leaning over the cavern. "Renesmee, what did you do? Is that _your _blood?"

The word almost made me faint, even though I knew I couldn't. I climbed up seeing the wound of her arm slit open, Edward right next to me frozen in anger. "Renesmee Carlie Cullen, are you crazy?"

"Yell at me later…" She sounded groggy with blood loss. "He lost consciousness about fifteen minutes ago. His leg is mangled and the gash in his side is pretty deep-I can see muscle. I packed it with his shirt, but it's still bleeding."

"And so are you!" Edward hissed.

I could tell he was going to jump in there himself if the police hadn't shown up when when they did, with Chief Mackabee leading the way. "You Cullen kids sure know these woods!" He looked shocked to see us, and who wouldn't be? They had a half an hour head start and we still beat them there.

Renesmee called up, repeating the man's injuries, and one of the paramedics lowered himself and a backboard down to lift the hiker back up on. The man did look seriously injured, and I could now see the blood sputtering on his lips-internal bleeding. Next they brought Renesmee up. I doubted she could jump back out even if she wanted to with her injured arm.

I grabbed her from the paramedic and embraced her, Edward holding both of us. We probably looked extremely odd to the rest of the onlookers, but I didn't care. This was my baby girl whether they knew it or not. Jake stood to the side looking absolutely sick, his eyes stuck on Renesmee's arm which now covered all of us in blood.

Nessie didn't let us hug her long before she pulled away and fell into Jake's arms, perhaps the first true sign of their opening feelings. "I thought I told you to be careful," he scolded.

"I did this on purpose," she said so none of the humans could hear. "I'm okay." She wasn't though, because when Jake loosened his grip on her she started to wobble back and forth.

And then I saw her fall.

Carlisle met us all at the hospital, insistent on taking over Renesmee's care even though doctors aren't supposed to treat their family. Because of his status in the medical field he usually got what he wanted. It was important that he had full control of her chart, especially when they wanted to give her blood. He had tried to test her blood type when she was born, but although it ran through her body like any other human, the typing always came back inconclusive, probably because of her diet. He promised us that O negative wouldn't hurt her, and wrote down on the chart that that's what she was. The staff also worried at first when she was reading a body temperature of one-oh-four, which was pretty average for her. Of course, we couldn't tell them that.

Charlie, I found out the hiker's name, had been rushed into surgery for both his leg and the internal injuries he sustained in the fall. Carlisle updated us frequently on his status; he was holding stable for now.

Alice couldn't see any future involving Renesmee-or at least anything to do with a future reaction of the family-because Jake refused to leave. He pulled the chair up to the bed and held her hand. A few times I saw him crying. He mumbled apology after apology to the sleeping girl. He told us on the way to the hospital that he wanted to go into the hole, but she convinced him that her medical knowledge would be of more help. He swore he had no idea she would do something so stupid as to open her arm back up.

"She's just like her mother." Edward put his arm around Jake's shoulders trying to comfort him. "Neither of them ever do what we expect of them to. We should just start expecting the opposite of whatever we assume."

It wasn't long before Renesmee came too, the blood helping to revive her. Of course, now my worry, once she opened her eyes, was that they were turning burgundy from the pure human blood being put into her system. That wasn't something we could explain.

"What did I do?" she asked looking a little punch-drunk, taking in the hospital room and a fresh bandage wrapped around her arm.

"Something stupid." Jacob had relief in his voice, but he was still upset. "What did I tell you?"

"Yeah, yeah," she said, and waved him off. "How is Charlie?"

"He's going to be fine." Edward was over at the opposite side of the bed holding her other hand. "Carlisle said you did a fantastic job with stopping the bleeding from his side. He would have bled out otherwise."

"Mmm, that's good. When can I go home?"

Carlisle entered the room silently behind us and closed to door. "As soon as possible," he said before we could answer. My reply would have been_ never, _but I was going to be overruled on that. "The news already has word of this and they're calling Nessie a hero. That's fine, she is, but in her current state," he lifted her chin and inspected her eyes, "she can't be seen by anyone. I've had to change her chart quite a bit. My superiors would have a fit if I took her home with a temperature as high as hers."

Carlisle made us wait until the nurses changed shift before he quickly discharged Nessie. The relief of the departing nurses and the groans of those coming on shift made for good distractions. By the time we had taken her off of the blood transfusion her eyes were a terrifyingly bright red. It made it hard for even me to look at her, but it didn't bother Jake a bit. On the way home she even fell asleep leaning on him.

He carried her inside and into her room when we got back, relief flooding everyone when they walked in. Esme looked like she could have been in tears, and even Rosalie and Emmett who had come from Portland looked unnerved.

"I swear, she is going to give me a heart attack. A completely impossible heart attack." Edward ran his hands through his messed hair.

"You're telling me!" Jake came into the room looking only a little bit better. "And I really _can _have a heart attack."

Edward went in to watch over her dreams, afraid that another nightmare about the Egyptian or Volturi would really send her over the edge, and the rest of the family dispersed to who knows where. Once again, I was alone with Jacob.

"I'm going to tell her," he said out of the blue.

My eyes brightened. "You are?"

"I don't know who I am without her, Bella, I don't. Until she was out of that damn cave and in my arms I wasn't whole. I was lost in some alternate world, but when I'm with her it's like she pulls me out of it. I can't explain it."

"You don't have to. I know." I pictured my wonderful husband sitting by our daughter's side. I definitely knew.


	11. Reality: Renesmee

Characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Sorry this has taken so long and sorry there is only one POV. I lost my job and haven't really been in a good mindset to write. There is a tiny something from Bella's POV after this though.

There was a question about Nessie's wound: Ramses attacked her in her "dream" (more about that later)... reasonable deduction is that only a vampire (or possibly a werewolf but not likely) could break her vampire skin. She thought of a brilliant albeit stupid idea of reopening that wound that wasn't fully healed so the rescue party wouldn't be suspicious that she jumped down 20 feet unhurt. Of course, she is half human, unlike her family who would not bleed out, and she lost enough blood to need a transfusion.

More about Ramses and a lot of fluff!

**Chapter 6 - Reality**

I felt fine the next morning, knowing already that I had slept yet again for an entire twenty-four hours straight by the placement of the sun in the sky, but my sleeping habits were soon overshadowed by the throbbing pain in my arm. _They are never going to let me live this down._

Jake's scent was incredibly strong in my room and I thought back to a few times when I woke to only a semi-conscious state, thinking that I saw him there at my bedside. I could only imagine what I looked like after my latest adventure and decided to face the music and got up to looked in the mirror.

Once again I screamed.

I knew I had to stop screaming like that and scaring everyone to death-at least figuratively speaking-but my eyes were blood red. I couldn't help but to compare myself to Jane. I was soon completely preoccupied with my new look, and couldn't answer my family who was frantically crowding into my room.

"Sorry. My eyes... they surprised me." My hair was darker than Jane's, and I was obviously older, but we both had soft features. It was definitely the eyes that made Jane so terrifying to me. Her eyes to me represented death. "I thought they would-always be brown. I didn't think I had vampire eyes."

Jasper calmed everyone down, especially Jacob who looked like he hadn't slept in days, and was now hovering directly over me.

"It was from the blood they gave you on Monday. I don't know why it affected you this time when it didn't as a baby. Perhaps because you ingested it when you were younger, but this time it was given intravenously? I'm really not sure. Don't you remember talking about this on Monday?" Carlisle asked concern.

"Mmm, it's kind of fuzzy."

"Dumbest thing you've ever done," Jake mumbled.

"Yeah, _thanks Jake, _I know that," I hissed. I forgot about my arm for a second and winced when I leaned against my dresser to get a better look at my face.

"Careful, Nessie!" Jake led me by the elbow back to sit on my bed. "You're so much smarter than this, what's with your sudden recklessness? I would say act your age, but you would probably have a smart comeback to that."

Back to being the big brother. "Get out of my room, Jacob," I said between a clenched jaw, and Jake looked absolutely torn at my words.

"Jake, please wait in the living room," my dad asked calmly. When Edward spoke like that, you listened.

"I want to be alone," I demanded. Everyone filed out, my mom lingering a little bit longer than the rest.

"Jake didn't mean anything by what he said," she promised, giving me a sly smile. "And I'm sorry that you take after me when it comes to great-bad ideas." She was referring to the story I had heard about a dozen times when she decided to distract two blood thirsty vampires by doing the same thing as I did; opening an old cut. The entire situation almost ended is disaster because of it.

I climbed back into bed, more embarrassed over my actions than anything. Then there was the confusion racking my mind. How could Jake could act like my brother one moment, but would show so much more affection the next? It was making my head spin.

I couldn't imagine that I could sleep anymore than I already had, but as a natural escape from the real world I did finally drift back off... and into Egypt.

Almost immediately the hot air choked me and I could taste the raw sand in my mouth as an arid gust of wind blew through the door. Ramses was there, but this time I was prepared. He was wearing the same garments he had been the last time I had seen him, and the sun was in precisely the same place in the sky. The same boy from the first dream ran by the doorway again, peeked in and ran off.

"Where are we?" I asked.

"So you believe me now, child?" He walked towards me, this time I didn't move away. I was back by the door anyway, and could run again if necessary.

"Please don't call me child, and I'll ask it again, where are we?"

"Have you figured out what I am?" He raised his eyebrows in curiosity.

"You can get into people's dreams... you can take them over."

"Close." He didn't seem as menacing as he had before, but the trust still wasn't there. "Only yours. I'm here for only one purpose, and that is to get you to come to Egypt."

"Are we really in Alexandria?" Everything was so real, but almost seemed almost staged.

"No. I just had to show you where you needed to be. It is only an illusion, but unlike dreams which are built from your memories, I am in your mind, creating this-hence why you can be physically harmed." He looked down at my bandaged arm. "I do not think you know how sorry I am for doing that to you... but there was no other way I could prove the reality of this."

"Why do I need to come to Alexandria? Does this have anything to do with that silly prophecy?" I had my hands on my hips; Ramses no longer scared me. "I am _no _prophet's child or whatever gibberish someone made up."

"That is why you _must _come here. You _all _must believe or you will fail."

"Fail at what?"

"Your destiny. Our destiny. You must-"

Ramses was gone. The bright sun was replaced with the cloudy evening sky of Oregon, and the sandy building for my bedroom. My father was standing over me.

"Please tell me you saw that," I said seriously. "Please tell me you believe him."

"I...I don't know. We really need to get in touch with Eleazar." Without another word he spun around and walked out of the room. I heard him talking to Carlisle upstairs, and the musical tones of the phone were dialing.

I could smell Esme's cooking in the kitchen which lured me from the confines of my room and out to face everyone. Jake was sitting on a stool, but instead of stuffing his face, he was only playing with the casserole on his plate. When he noticed me he shot up.

Before he could open his mouth I put my finger up silencing him. "I don't want to _talk _to you right now," I snapped, and walked out to the garage.

I could tell he was following me, afraid to say anything at first. When I finally turned around to look at him I was surprised to see how close he was, and spun back the other direction when my face went flush.

"Nessie? Nessie what's wrong?" I could feel the heat radiating off of him. He called me Nessie, the name he called me when I was a little girl. When he thought of me as a child.

"Can you just go away?" I couldn't bear to be near him and feel this way. I didn't know how to turn it off.

"Please tell me what's wrong? I'm sure I can help."

I pressed my lips together and faced him. "You're the problem, Jacob Black."

His face distorted as if I struck him, his hands were stiff at his side, not sure what they should be doing. "Nay..."

"No, let me finish! You asked!" I couldn't let him interrupt again or I'd never get any of this off of my chest. "I can't tell what you want from me Jake. You get so close, but then you talk to me like I'm your little sister. You call me your friend. You give me a friendship necklace, but the next second you don't seem to see me in that way at all. It's weird and it's confusing. I don't know what you want from me!"

His big strong hands found my shoulders and then they slid down my arms and rested there. "Do you honestly think I still look at you like you're my little sister?"

I finally looked up at him, way up. No, he wasn't looking at me like that right now, but in the way I dreamed that he would. I felt his hands carefully move down to my waist, pulling me in slowly as if I may break. I couldn't remember in my adult life ever being this close to him; this aware. I would have sworn I was in the middle of cardiac arrest at the rate my heart was beating. He leaned his tall frame down so our lips were only inches apart. I closed my eyes afraid I was about to wake up from one of my ridiculously realistic dreams, but when his lips met mine I had never felt so awake before in my life. His lips parted and his warm hand moved to my cheek, the other tightened around my waist even more. His lips left mine and he kissed down my neck and back up again, sending electric shocks through my spine. He ended with one last soft kiss. When he stopped I opened my eyes to his smiling face.

"Satisfied?" But he didn't let me answer, his lips silencing me once again.

This was what my first kiss was supposed to be. It was supposed to make me feel like I was going to explode inside. Make me feel like I would drown if it ever stopped. It was supposed to be with Jake, his lips warm, not cool, against mine. Some part of me that I had never recognized before was telling me this was the _only _way. It was that part of me that had felt so detached in his absence. That part was now alive. I was finally whole.

"I'm sorry," he hummed in my ear. "I didn't know how-how to tell you how I felt. I was afraid. I didn't want it to come out this way-I didn't want you to ever be this upset. I'm so sorry."

I felt tears stinging my eyes. "How do you feel?" I had to hear him say it or it wouldn't be real.

"I never stop thinking about you, Renesmee. You're there in my thoughts every second of every day. If I could, I would never leave your side. I am absolutely. Completely. Head over heels for you."

"That's good," I reached up and ran my hand down his face because it was something I had wanted to do for the longest time, "because I feel the same way."

He pulled me to him again, this time wrapping his arms completely around me and holding me so tightly against his chest I could feel the thud every time his heart beat. I rested my head there, over his heart, feeling mine grow ten times the size it had been for seven years. It was no longer big enough to hold my feelings anymore; it had no choice but to grow. He rested his chin on my head as he had done on Monday after the accident in the cave, but this time there were no boundaries like there had been only two days ago. There was nothing in between us.

"I wonder what the reactions are going to be when we go into the house," I said into his shirt.

He laughed and lifted my chin, kissing me on the nose. "We're pretty transparent; they all are very much aware that this was coming."

"They know?" I gasped. "Even my dad?"

"I know they seem nosy at times, but they are very respectful, _especially _Edward who always knows what's on everyone's mind. Give them some credit."

We stood out in the garage tangled in each other, but it was over too soon when I heard our names being called in the house. "Guess it's time to face reality." I frowned.

He stopped me before I could walk out and hooked my hand in his, intermingling our fingers. _This is the best feeling in the world, _I thought to myself.

_I agree, _Jake replied silently. We were meant to be, _that _is why he was the only one that could hear my thoughts.

We were at the bottom of the back porch, I could hear everyone in the living room, and my stomach began doing somersaults. "Do we have to?" I looked up at him with doe eyes.

"I think so," he said and winked. "But first..." I didn't need to ask what he meant by that because he grabbed my face and kissed me again with more confidence this time, not holding back. It didn't last long as we both noticed several figures in the window watching us. "That's just in case you chicken out later," he teased.

Alice was jumping up and down when we walked in, giggling as she hugged me. There was no hiding anything; both Jake and I couldn't stop smiling and wouldn't move more than a few inches away from each other. Esme and Carlisle were glowing, my dad even looking happy. My mom was the only one that held an odd expression. I could tell she was happy and even proud, but there was _something _else there...

"Finally!" Alice cheered. "Oh this is so wonderful! I should call Rose and Emmett!"

"Why don't you just call the local newspaper," I sassed.

Jasper came behind Alice and wrapped his arm around her waist. "Let's not go _too _overboard. Besides, I'm quite sure this relationship isn't legal in the state of Oregon."

I hadn't even thought of that. I was only sixteen, technically, and Jake was twenty-four. "Secret is fine with me." I still hadn't stopped smiling.

I had wanted to ride my bike, but that was quickly shot down by my parents and Jake. I thought Jake was about to suggest something, but he stopped mid-sentence, nodding slightly to my dad.

"How about a movie night?" Esme suggested. She had purchased one of the stove top popcorn kettles and enjoyed making it the old fashion way, testing out different combinations of flavors on us.

I thought for a moment and realized that it _would _give us a reason to sit on the couch together-very closely on the couch together-and although I was pretty new to all of this, from watching my family it seemed as though movies were appropriate times to do that. As far as I knew Jake was new to all of this also, which is why when we first sat down it took us an awkward minute before we figured out how to sit as close as possible while remaining both comfortable yet proper. I was sitting only feet away from my parents after all.

No one really paid much attention to the movie. I felt all eyes on us but, my eyes were on Jake's hands. I was fascinated with them, running the tips of my fingers up and down each one of his and then circling his palm. Every once in a while he'd close his fist and squeeze me. That minute gesture meant so much more than words. My mom winked at us, allowing relief to wash over me because her original reaction made me a little nervous. I figured that meant her shield is up, and when I yelled _Daddy! _in my head and there was no reaction from Edward, I felt much more comfortable. My dad on the other hand, although he was trying his best not to make a fuss about it, was obviously not a fan of his temporary mental deafness.

_You're beautiful, _Jake told me. _I would wait until we're alone to tell you out loud, but I just can't wait. I've wanted to tell you for so long._

I wish we were alone, now, I answered. For the first time I thought about Jake in yet another way, a way I subconsciously must have blocked myself from thinking about. I pictured us in his apartment with my snooping family miles away, in his room...in his bed... He shuttered at my mental images.

_You're going to be trouble, _he accused.

I didn't answer, but turned my body away from the television and laid down on his chest. This, I had decided, was my favorite place in the world.

"Phone!" Alice said out of nowhere, and as usual, the phone rang only seconds later.

Carlisle was murmuring into the phone, but walked far enough away that I couldn't hear who was on the other end. My dad got up, walking closer and away from my mom's shield.

"No, thank you anyway, we really appreciate it," Carlisle hung up the phone turning back to us. "That was Eleazar. He knows nothing about any vampire who can enter dreams as this one does."

"He told me he could only do it to me," I insisted. "He said we have to go to Alexandria."

Jasper fiercely shook his head. "No way, it is way too dangerous if Alice hasn't seen anything yet. We cannot allow it. If the Volturi find out that you are so close to them they may come for you."

"I'm going to have to agree with Jasper." Carlisle sat back down with Esme. "Until we have some proof of what is waiting for us, we cannot make a move."

"But what if this is what we've been looking for? Ramses said that's where the truth behind the prophecy is!" I slumped back down on the couch and crossed my arms.

For an entire second I forgot I was sitting next to Jacob until he began to stroke my cheek with the back of his hand. "If it's meant to be it will happen," he whispered.

The rest of the movie was dreadful now that my mood was ruined. No matter what Jacob showed me in our own special way, it wouldn't pull me out of my silent tantrum. I just couldn't bring myself to believe that Ramses wasn't telling the truth. How could I explain my arm? How could I explain the heat and sand and smells? It was all too real to blame on a silly dream.

For the first time I wished myself to sleep. I laid my head back down on Jake's chest, concentrating on his heartbeat and slowly let myself drift back to Egypt...

I wasn't in the room, but a staircase made out of the same sandy blocks the grotto was built from. There were lanterns hanging on the walls, with only a few lit, allowing saving my eyes from dealing with complete darkness. Behind me, at the top of the stairs, I could see what looked like daylight barely making its way downwards. In front of me the stairs disappeared into shadows, but my eyes picked up the faintest possible glow at the very end.

The sand crumbled from the wall as I dragged my fingers down the wall of the spiral staircase, carefully placing one foot in front of the other, unsure of the structure's stability. The glow was getting brighter as I moved more quickly down the stairs, my nose beginning to pick up scents. Vampire. Wood. Linen. Leather. I now was sure that the light source was made from candles because of the way they danced in the shadows. When I finally reached the end, Ramses stood with his back towards me, looking down at a desk against a far wall.

The room was enormous. The ceiling reached as high as Carlisle's library walls, and the shelves made from ancient wood lined each one from top to bottom. Old parchment and scrolls were stacked haphazardly on each one, some journals with broken leather bindings helped to keep them in place. Several desks, their matching wooden bodies were dark from years of rot, were lined up against the walls with yet more paper covering their surface.

"What...what _is _this place?" I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that a place this large could be found so far deep under the earth.

Ramses turned, delighted at my new found interest in his story. "This is what is left of the Royal Library of Alexandria."

The name didn't ring any bells for me.

"One of the greatest libraries ever built, child. Julius Caesar himself burnt it to the ground, by accident of course, and along with it many precious documents of the early eastern world... or at least they thought they were gone." As if he forgot he was in the middle of an explanation, Ramses walked across the room in silence, fingering through the books on one particular wall. "Mmhmm," he said to himself. "They were saved by our kind, unbeknown to the humans, and kept here since before the supposed birth of Christ."

Now it was my turn to look at the timeworn paper strewn over the desks. They were all in languages I did not know, some were not even in the modern day alphabet, but in symbols and signs. Finally, I found one scroll that almost fell apart in my hands. It was not quite one language, but a mixture of several romantic languages combined. I could pick out certain words, stringing them along in broken sentences, but not able to figure out the meaning.

"What language is this in?" I asked, still attempting to make sense out of it.

"A dead language from back when the world spoke only one."

"Wait, are you telling me that there is truth to the Tower of Babel?" We obviously were not religious per se, but Carlisle and my mom both believed in an afterlife that our souls would journey to. I knew the stories of the bible, including the Tower of Babel that tells the tale of mankind building a tower up to the Heavens to reach God. To punish them and make sure nothing like that happened again, God made them all speak different languages.

"Child, please, look at me," Ramses pleaded, still standing several feet across the room. "Look here, this table-this is where you must go. This is what you must show your family."

"Can't you just show me now...?"

I fell back into an empty space; the one between sleep and awake. The library was gone, Ramses was gone, and I could once again feel Jacob's warm body under mine.

"Renesmee? Nay, wake up!"

_No, no I have to get back there. I didn't see enough!_

I was in Astoria, in a room full of vampires and a werewolf. No Egypt, no library, no prophecy. "_Why _in the world would you do that?" I sat up glaring at my family.

"Maybe I should be the one asking you what on earth you were dreaming about," Jake retorted. He must have seen my dreams through our touch.

I looked up at my dad, hoping he had been watching too, and from the expression on his face I was sure he had seen it all. "We are still not doing anything until Alice sees _something _tangible." I was about to interrupt but he cut me off before I could. "No, your dreams are _not _tangible!"

"They aren't dreams!" I snapped. "How do you explain my injury? You saw my dream this morning! Just because Eleazar has never heard of one, that doesn't mean it isn't possible! What about Benjamin? Can I e-mail Audrey? Can I see if they remember anyone from Egypt that fits the description?"

"Renesmee, you're just having a difficult time separating reality and fantasy. I used to have extremely real dreams also. Ask your Dad." My mom was now sitting with us on the couch and her tone, as if I was still a child, was patronizing and insulting.

In one last attempt to lash back at my parents, I turned to Jake and kissed him hard on the lips. I didn't even bother looking at any of their faces; the absence of breathing was enough to know I had given them a hypothetical slap across the face. I flounced off into my room, not hearing another word out of any of them. I would show them reality.


	12. Reality: Bella

**A/N**: Okay, this came to mind…it's not really a chapter though…

**Chapter 6 - Reality  
Bella**

Seven years ago I knew this day would come… at least a part of me knew it…yet there was the other half that truly believed I would be able to keep Jacob all to myself for an eternity.

I was still sitting on the couch when Renesmee got up and kissed him before storming off, and the feeling that went down into my bones was indescribable. All I had ever wanted was for him to have the same Happily Ever After as I had, but now the part of my heart that had grown in order to fit both him and Edward, was suddenly hollow inside.

It seemed like it was only yesterday when I pulled my old truck to the side of the road and cried. I cried until Edward came to comfort me, like he was comforting me now, sitting besides me with his arms around my body so tightly that I knew if I asked, he'd never let go.

For seven years I was sure we had moved on, but for the first time ever I realized Jake was the one that had. I, I had been sitting by the side of the road in my truck suffering through that last goodbye still. I was still suffering from my choice. It was the right choice, of course, but the fact that I had to make it… that never went away. There was a reality that I had to come to grips with:

Jake had saved me.

Jake had loved me.

Jake had suffered for me.

Jake was not mine any longer, and would never be again.


	13. Winter Wonderland: Renesmee

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**Chapter 7 - Winter Wonderland**

I didn't think school could be anymore dreadful until later that fall. From early morning until late afternoon I was stuck listening to teachers drone on about subjects I had learned years ago, while I was busy looking out the window wondering what Jake was doing at that very moment.

It had been months since we came clean to each other, but still every time I looked at him, he left me speechless all over again. Jake's presence in the house was nothing new to anyone, he had been around since I was born, but the manner in which he was there definitely took the rest of the family a while to get used to. Not so surprisingly, my dad was the worst. He hovered over us like a hummingbird to a flower, giving us barely any time to ourselves. If Jake would kiss me, even if it was an ever so polite kiss on the lips, Edward would take in a quick gasp of air to let us know he was watching.

Thank heavens for my mom who constantly kept her shield up when Jake and I were together, at least allowing us to talk to each other through our unexplainable telepathic connection without my dad listening in. It was a full-time job for her since Jake spent almost every waking moment with me, but to me it seemed as though she felt like she owed it to us. I heard her chastise my dad comparing their relationship before they were married to ours now. We were across the house at the time and I couldn't hear, nor did I want to hear, the grumble of his reply.

The autumn turned to winter and all too soon the slush that was Oregon's sad excuse for snow covered the ground, icing it over at night and making the weekends impossible to enjoy our bikes. Durable or not, riding on ice and having the bike slip out from under me every few minutes was not my idea of a good time. Besides that, my weekends, along with my mom's, had been claimed by Alice who had an entire agenda ready in preparation for the winter formal which was only one week away.

"Like this?" I showed off an arrangement of flowers in one of the many vases that had taken over the dining room.

Alice scrunched her tiny nose and squinted - what I wouldn't do to know her unedited thoughts sometimes. "A little less green and a lot more white. And oh! You forgot the stones!" She handed me a bag of smooth white stones to drop in the bottom, giving an almost silver reflection from the lighting.

My mom's bouquet looked more like a lawn mower had gone through Esme's garden. She threw down the flowers and leaned back on the chair.

"I would think by now you would know this really isn't my strong suit," she whined.

Anyone else would have been kind enough to give Bella encouragement, but Alice being a perfectionist was only nodding at the pathetic excuse for decor and her sister's lack of talent. "Go ahead and paint or whatever you do," she said, and hurried Bella out of the room before turning her attention back to me. "So, who is your date for the dance? I can't seem to see anything... or in your case _not _see anything."

I had tried to put that question off as long as possible. "No one. I can't take Jake, school rules, and I don't really want to go with anyone else." Alice was about to object but I continued before she could get another word in. "I figured I'd help you run the show."

My aunt was so easily pleased.

I looked through the sketches on the table noticing how many of the ideas that had been rejected, including Alice's fantastic rendition of a crystal chandelier. Then there was the incredible hissy fit Alice had made when the principal told her that it had to be held in the gymnasium. This supposedly foiled all of her plans, or at least that's what she blubbered into Jasper's shirt with faux tears. She was stuck either way; no space in Astoria could fit all 800 some odd students, and leaving town was out of the question according to the administration. So we were making due with what we had, which happened to be almost an unlimited budget. I was positive this was the last time the faculty would allow Alice in on a project.

"Where's Jake?" My mom carefully peeked her head back into the room.

I sighed. "The one night we can go out and he has a late class." I wondered if it would be too overbearing of me to request that he not have Friday night classes from now on.

"Yes, it would be," my dad said, appearing from behind my mom.

"Nosy," I snorted.

I hadn't been sleeping well the past few weeks, my nightly visits from Ramses never let me actually fall into what Carlisle called the REM cycle, and although it was only eight o'clock I still found myself yawning.

"Why don't you at least attempt to get some sleep tonight?" Alice suggested, putting away her crafts for the evening.

I really was exhausted so I dragged myself up to my room. Ramses and I only spoke lately, and not much about the prophecy. I told him more about the Volturi and the confrontation in Forks, which he found fascinating. Then there was the truce with the werewolves and Jacob. And finally, about me, which oddly enough he found to be the most fascinating part of all of this.

"You have to understand child," he had told me once in his calm but haunting voice, "when you are here for one purpose and one purpose only, you become rather excited after two thousand years to finally see it - or in my case, see you."

I promised him I was trying to convince my family to take the trip to Egypt, but they based most of their decisions on Alice's visions - and she hadn't had any yet.

At least half an hour had passed and I realized I didn't hear much talking from outside my room - almost none actually. I tried to figure out where everyone was in the house, a skill that was not as finely tuned at my full-blooded family: Esme was humming from the study; I had seen her with her scrapbooks earlier. The television was on very low, and I could just pick up the giggles of Alice; Jasper must have been there too, but he was normally quiet so it would be impossible to know. For the life of me as my senses searched the house, I had no idea where my parents were. I even took a chance to listen in the direction of their room, but there were no inappropriate signs in there.

Listening to the sounds outside my door was comforting and I hoped it would help bring me sleep. More time had gone by, the sounds changed but I could tell I was having a harder time recognizing them as I was finally drifting off.

That's when I felt his presence before my keen eyesight noticed his face above me, even in the pitch darkness of the winter night.

"Jake!" I hissed. "Are you crazy? My dad will kill you if he finds you in here!"

He shook his head and pulled the sheet back on my bed, trying not to have a reaction to the boy shorts I was wearing. "Your mom and dad are hunting. All night."

"How do you know they won't be be back?" I tried to fight him for the sheets as he slipped under them, but I heard the clear _ripppppp _of the sheets as I lost that battle. He threw them off of the bed, grinning, and even though I was still protesting he pulled me under his arm and I felt my entire body go warm and tingly.

He kissed the top of my forehead and played with my hair. "He's distracted," he winked.

"Is my mom in on this?" I gasped.

"She feels as though that your dad is being quite hypocritical since they got to spend almost every night together. He'll be kept busy one way or another."

I turned my face up in disgust. "You are so referring to their sex life aren't you? Ugh, ew!" I turned my face into the pillow banishing the mental images.

"Hey now, you have your boyfriend in bed with you. Let's concentrate on that." He pulled me even closer into his body and intertwined our legs together. "Please?"

The word he used finally registered. "B-boyfriend?"

"Well, I know I hadn't talked to you about it, but I was hoping you'd be all right with that."

I took his face in my hands, running my fingers through his black short hair, and kissed him hard. I realized then how much of our bare skin was actually touching - more than ever had before. I raked my fingers down his bare back and felt goosebumps raise up on his arms. He returned the gesture by wrapping his arms around me and pressing our bodies against each other, eventually moving his fingers to my long mane of hair. When my hands finally slipped lower on his back, he stopped.

"Wait, wait, Nay."

"Hmmm?" I was trying to keep his lips on mine but he kept pulling away.

"I did promise your mom there would be no funny business. That was the deal."

I rolled off of him and crossed my arms, pouting. "Hmph!"

"If I behave then there's the possibility of this being a more regular thing, you know." He was grinning now, having proven his point, and pulled the covers over us. It really wasn't necessary, but the thought of being completely closed off from everyone but him made me shiver in a very good way.

I don't know how long we were silent for. I found myself lost in his steady heartbeat and slow breathing. Every time he exhaled through his mouth it would blow across my neck and I'd stiffen trying as hard as I could to not jump him again and ruin the chances of more alone time. I had never gotten to be with him like this - not with a mind reading father, an aunt who can see the future, and a household occupied by super sensitive vampires.

"Renesmee," his voice came out of nowhere, so mature and calm, so not the Jacob I used to know. "I'm going to say something to you and I don't want you to say anything. At all. Understand?"

I nodded hesitantly. He loosened his grip on me and repositioned himself so we were each laying on the pillows face to face, only inches a part.

"I love you."

My world was rocked at the sound of those words. The dark room seemed to light up and everything in it, including him, became even clearer than I could possibly imagine.

"I-," but that was all I got out before he raised a finger to my lips.

"No," he whispered. Before I could protest he started to kiss me again.

I fell in and out of sleep all night, not sure where my dreams ended and reality began. Ramses did not bother me at all; my real dreams were in charge now. I would get flashes of the last few months and every once in a while they took me even farther away to Forks where I was surrounded by Grandpa Charlie, and Sue, and La Push. Those dreams weren't of the past though, but of the future. A future where we were back where we belonged. I was basking in these dreams, but they never lasted long before I would be sucked back into the real world - although reality seemed just as much a dream. I was still in Jake's arms, still surrounded by his deep woodsy scent. I had to stir in his embrace to make sure I could feel him there... to make sure he was real.

"Nay, are you still awake?" he murmured.

"Mmhmm," I curled myself closer to him, turning into his chest. "I just have to keep making sure this is all real."

"You need your sleep." I felt him kissing my head and sighing.

"I need you," I corrected.

"I'm not going anywhere." He squeezed me tighter.

I finally couldn't help but to give into sleep again, knowing that he would keep his word. My Jacob would be there when I woke up.

I thought I woke up again, but I was in a sleeping bag and I felt cold - really cold. I had never known what it felt like to _be _cold, and it took a while before I connected the feeling of my parents skin to the biting pain that was radiating throughout my body. There were murmurs that I couldn't make out; arguing. Finally one voice became clearer: _"I'll have you sweating in no time,"_ said a playful but gruff voice. It was Jake, unzipping the sleeping bag and climbing in with me. He was so hot I thought I would melt at first, but as my body defrosted I felt better. It was all so confusing when I heard my dad and Jake talking, making references that didn't seem to be about me, but the words were so muddled I couldn't grasp the entire topic. There was a horrible storm outside of the small tent we all seemed to be confined in. I stirred in the sleeping bag, Jake giving me room. His skin was still so hot! The conversation turned back to a jumble of noise, the last thing I heard before falling completely into the cold darkness was my dad's voice _"...and that you're also trying to steal away the reason for my existence, I might actually like you."_ What existence?

I didn't get to wonder any longer for the sun came in from my window, sparkling across the room through the space the blinds made. I turned onto my back, my arm hitting something solid and warm.

"Jake!" I threw both my arms and legs around him. He was there. It wasn't all a dream.

"Good morning, beautiful," he kissed me.

The entire night flooded back to me and I soaked up every memory, especially what he said to me. He said I love you. Then I began to recall the dreams. Some were memories, some were what I hoped the future would be, but then there was the one that didn't fit. For the life of me I don't know why I would dream of being cold. I tried to bring back up the words that Jake and Edward had been saying, but the longer Jake kissed me the fainter they became.

Jake and I welcomed the omelets that Esme had ready when we finally got up. My dad was in the corner of the room looking like Satan himself, but he faked a smile anyway, my mom patting his hand in approval.

"Sleep well?" Alice skipped into the room giving us both grins. I blushed and Jake ran his hand across my cheek.

"Yes, Alice, thanks so much for asking." I scowled popping a forkful of eggs into my mouth. "I had the strangest dream though. I was in a tent...and in a sleeping bag. I was cold - really crazy because I don't know what being cold feels like. Dad and Jake were there. It was so weird." I left out the part that Jake was in the sleeping bag with me of course, knowing that wouldn't go over very well.

I hadn't even finished my thought when Jake's fork dropped from his hand, hit the counter, and bounced to the floor. He didn't use his fast reflexes to catch it, although I knew he easily could have. It jingled as the ends tapped back and forth on the tile until it lay there, unmoving. Both of my parents' faces were blank.

"I wish I could dream," Alice sighed, but her eyes were still darting around the room. "I don't even get to remember dreaming from when I was human." Alice's life was a big black space before she was turned into a vampire. They found out years later that James, the vampire who hunted my mom and whose mate tried for years to avenge his death, had been after Alice who was locked up in an asylum. To keep her safe, the vampire who was protecting her changed her instead. She woke up, saw my family and Jasper in her future, and life for her was set.

I scanned the room again, not understanding everyone's initial reaction, but by the time I refocused, their faces were calm and Jake was helping himself to a second plate of eggs, a new fork in his hand.

Later on, to Alice's horror, she found out that I still didn't have a dress for the dance and demanded that we make a trip to Portland. I didn't even bother to ask my mom to make the drive with us; fashion held no interest for her. She promised Alice she had a dress and that it would get the Alice seal of approval and it frustrated Alice to no end that she couldn't get a grip of the future and which dress she would be wearing.

"What are you wearing?" Alice gasped in horror. I turned around to see my gorgeous mother in a very classic black chiffon cocktail dress. It was plain, yes, but she still would be one of the most gorgeous girls at the dance.

"You picked it out for me, Alice. You of all people should approve." I noticed then my mom's sly smile; there was an inside joke that I was obviously on the outside for."

"How did you get this passed me?" Alice was fuming mad, but I knew it wasn't so much over the dress but that her ability was thwarted for the past week since we had gone dress shopping.

Now my dad was laughing. "She pulled a Victoria; didn't make a decision until you got back." That phrase was coined in memory of the red-haired vampire who tried to kill my mother on several occasions. She got through Alice's foresight by not making a decision and therefore keeping the future in limbo.

"Seriously though Alice, this is a three thousand dollar dress, it isn't made to be worn only once." My mom had her arm around her sister. "Now why don't you do my hair?"

My aunt was easily consolable, although easily amused may be a better description. At the same time she was dragging my mom down the hallway, she was shoving me off into my room to change and warning me I would be next in line. After all, _she _had to get to the dance early to "coordinate."

By the time we were all ready and of course, passed Alice's approval before she left with Jasper, Jake had arrived to see us off. I had been excited all day to show him my dress; a ruby red, strapless, taffeta cocktail dress. I couldn't help but admire myself as Alice had put the finishing touches on me in the bathroom. It brought out the red highlights of my hair and added a little more pink to my normally.

Jake's expression was not one I was expecting to see though: Horror. Pain. Sadness.

Immediately I felt sick to my stomach before even registering entirely what was going on. Any color that had been in my face must have been washed white because my mom came over and put her arm around my waist.

"Doesn't she look amazing, Jacob?" she prodded.

For the life of me I couldn't understand what was wrong that made Jake give such an instinctive reaction of dread. Even with my mom's words breaking the ice, Jake barely nodded and gave me a forced smile.

"I have to go get my bag," I said in a tiny voice, afraid I would cry if I stood there any longer.

I took in deep breaths trying to compose myself as I fumbled with my purse; I refused to go to the dance with puffy eyes.

I could hear the sharp snap of my dad going into father-mode from the living room. "I understand, but she can't read your mind from across the room. Go make this right, _now._"

I heard him walk towards my room although he was almost inhumanly quiet. "Nay?" He didn't even knock.

"What?" My reply was short and angry but my heart still raced.

He was right behind me now, his arms around my waist and his face in the crook of my neck, whispering into my ear. "I'm sorry for that. It's not what you think at all." I could see in his mind, now that we were touching, his first impression of me when I walked out. Then, like a broken movie, his mental images began to flicker from Marcus Collins, to other random boys that went to my school.

"Jacob Black," I turned and faced him, "are you... jealous?"

He grinned. "I wouldn't call it jealous...you just don't understand how hard it is for me to let you go _like that,_" he eyed me up and down, "to somewhere that I won't be."

"I don't think you need to worry about that; my dad and Jasper are plenty scary and will frighten all the boys away." I tried to joke around, but it wasn't working.

"Not what I'm talking about, Nay." He shook his head and studied me over again. "I know this sounds horrible but I want them to know that... that you're _mine._" I had a comeback for that comment, but he stopped me to correct himself before I could say it. "And I'm not trying to be chauvinistically possessive or anything, please don't think I think of you as an object I-"

I clamped my hand over his mouth. "I know exactly what you mean."

"Can I try this again?"

I pretended to think about it for a second and finally nodded.

"Renesmee, you look beautiful. You are the most stunning woman I've ever seen before in my life. I love you and I am _so _very glad you are mine."

It was so sappy, but I ate it all up anyway. "Well, thank you. And I _do _wish you were coming to the dance, but you're too _old._" I only half-teased; it was a school rule that attendees had to be high school students.

I had figured by the time we walked back to the living room holding hands, that my Dad had heard Jake's thoughts when he walked in, which is the only explanation as to why he didn't throw Jake out for upsetting me. He looked completely content, as did the rest of my family... except for my mom. Again. It was the absence of something that was bugging me, and I couldn't for the life of me figure it out.

It was nothing, I decided. Edward may be the more vocal about his parental protectiveness, but Bella was probably just extremely good at hiding it.

Over the last several years, very few things Alice did surprised me anymore, and the dance was no exception.

The gym did not even _look _like the same gym I spent so many horrible hours in during class. The ceiling was draped with tulle in silver and blue, which met at a point in the middle and a disco ball hung from the center. The flower arrangements we had worked on made up a good portion of the high top tables, all of which were covered in either a light blue or white tablecloth that reached the floor. Bowls of delicate blue and white ornaments were on the side tables among the hors d'oeuvres and drinks. Fake white trees lined the walkway onto the dance floor, each wrapped in lights with crystal-looking snowflakes hanging from their branches.

"Well, this place definitely screams _winter wonderland,_" Edward chuckled.

"Thank you!" Alice came from behind and bowed. "I did what I could," she sighed. When my dad laughed I guessed she had been picturing what the room _could _have looked like. She stuck out her tiny tongue and flounced off, dragging Jasper behind her. "Oh and Nessie, I won't forget your promise!"

"What promise?" my mom questioned.

"I told her I'd help her out - it was either that or be hounded for not having a date."

"Well at least you're learning to pick your battles," she joked.

I did my part and welcomed people as they filed into the dance, all of their eyes growing ten times their size at the magnificent room. Grace walked in, arm and arm with Marcus. I had told her about Jacob, which she claimed was obvious from the beginning, but of course she immediately went and told Marcus so his attention on me would be shifted to her. If anyone was obvious, it was Grace.

"Alice sure knows how to go all the way," Grace bounced into the room, handing Marcus her coat. He only gave me a weak smile, still a little bit burned by our failed date, or so said my dad.

"Make sure to get your picture taken," I pointed over to the winter backdrop, all of the two-somes lining up for the photographer to take their picture.

I looked around for my family; Alice was barking orders at the rest of the dance committee who I was positive by now hated the little pixie dictator. Jasper was calming them all down in his magical way. My parents took the dance floor, probably Edward's doing since my mom hated being the center of attention, and other couples joined in.

I wished with all of my might that I could be with Jacob, whether he was here with me or I was somewhere with him. Maybe I should have found someone to take with me, so at least I'd have someone to dance with; I had no aversion to being the center of attention.

I saw Bella streak off to where Alice was fixing some lights that had started to droop, and the next thing I knew my dad had me twirling around him and we were among the others in the midst of a slow song.

"Did you read my mind?" I accused.

"Perhaps," he said with a wink. "I do wish Jake could have come to keep you company."

"Sometimes I think you hate him."

My dad sighed deeply as if he had been holding it in for a long time. "My relationship with Jake has been rocky from the beginning, long before you were born."

"Because of the whole vampire versus werewolf thing?"

"Pretty much," he agreed and nodded, but I was sure there was more he wasn't saying.

I was kept busy by Alice and whisked away twice more to dance; once by Marcus, and another by his best friend Brandon who had the unfortunate luck to get asked by one of the more obnoxious girls in our class, Miranda. He was too nice to say no.

"I know you have that boyfriend or whatever, but we should have thought of this earlier and gone together. Just as friends, of course."

"Probably would be better than being Alice's slave." I laughed for the first time that night.

The dance couldn't have gone fast enough for my liking, but as the gym doors opened we were all secretly surprised by the snowfall that had covered everything from the ground to the treetops. It was like Alice's decor had taken over the rest of Astoria.

"You knew this would happen, didn't you?" Jasper nudged Alice while helping her into her jacket - something that was completely for show - and kissing her cheek ever so gently.

"Edward knew too," she tattled.

"It's beautiful." I saw my mom reach for my dad's hand and squeeze it.

"You're beautiful," he whispered.

I could never wrap my head around all the hundreds of thousands of people who are constantly looking for love and here was my entire family, each with their soul mates. Jake and I were too new to all of this for me to even consider that possibility. Maybe it could be... one day...

When we walked into the house my dad's immediate reaction was "hmph!" but my mom quickly rushed him off to their bedroom. It took me a half second longer to know what he was annoyed with and I sprinted to my room only to find Jacob sprawled out on my bed.

"You are too perfect for words," he breathed.

I threw myself on the bed with him, our lips finding each other like magnets. I felt the passion begin to rise but the dress was constricting.

"I need to change," I forced myself to pull away. "Could you possibly unzip me?" I smirked. "I'll _never _reach it."

I felt my torso become free of the dress, the zipper ending just above my tailbone. Before I could turn around I jumped at Jake's lips kissing down my bare back.

"What happened to no funny business?"

"Well," he turned me around, "stop being so irresistible."

I motioned him to turn around and I pulled out pajamas from a drawer, slipping out of the dress. A part of me so desperately wanted him to look at me as I changed, but I knew he was too loyal to my mom to go back on his word to her.

My attempt to sneak up on him failed of course, and he swung me around so I was now lying under him on the bed. He scooped me up so I was tucked in his arms and kissed up and down my neck a dozen times before resting his chin above my head and breathing in my hair.

"The snow is so pretty," I looked towards the window, the frozen crystals mesmerizing me. I wished then that everyone could hear what the flakes sounded like when they hit the ground; like the patter of a kitten's footsteps.

I tried not to yawn, knowing he would order me to bed, but I couldn't hold it in.

"Sleep angel," he whispered, and I couldn't find it in me to argue.


	14. Winter Wonderland: Bella

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**Chapter 7 - Winter Wonderland**

**Bella**

_Edward is my life. My eternity. My reason for being._

That's what I kept telling myself, all of which is true of course, but I could not figure out for the life of me why it pained me to see Jacob with Renesmee. For the last seven years I was always wary about what it would do to me, but never did I think I would feel... this. I wasn't even sure what _this _was.

The worst of all was that I knew Edward could read my confusion and uncertainty – not in my mind, but in my body and emotions - so he was becoming more paranoid when Jake and Nessie were together. I found myself constantly putting down my shield to mentally yell at him to calm down. Then there was my constant use of it to shield my loving husband _out _of their heads. Renesmee's ability worked both ways with only Jacob for a reason, I was sure of that, and they deserved to be able to use it to their advantage.

All of these attempts to make it easier for the new couple made my feelings seem even blurrier. I needed to talk to someone about it, other than Edward, but there was the small detail of his telepathy working on everyone else in the world, except for me. There was only one second best choice, and she knew it before I did.

"Bella!" Alice called from across the house after the boys had left to go hunt.

I peaked into her room where she sat on her bed, legs crossed and her tiny head cocked to one side.

"Well?" She urged.

"You can watch your thoughts around him better than anyone," I explained, realizing she already knew what we were going to talk about.

"You have me stumped, to be honest." She patted the bed and I took a seat next to her.

"I have nothing against their relationship. If anything I think I've been rather unparental and pushing Edward's boundaries."

"Edward has and always been a teeny bit prone to overreaction and overprotection when it comes to you and Renesmee."

She was right there. Edward had "kidnapped" me to keep me from going to visit Jacob. That was another lifetime ago...

"I guess I just see Renesmee as my equal now, which isn't really the problem..." Why couldn't I put my finger on it?

"It doesn't matter what the problem is, you just keep fighting for their relationship. I'm sure you already know that Edward has picked up on your mood, so things may get tense with Jacob around."

"Sometimes I think he just pretends to not be able to read my mind," I muttered.

"You are both just very attuned to each other, that's all."

My dead heart was beginning to sting and I had to get my mind on something else. I picked up the papers on Alice's bed.

"Formal?"

"Yup. Stupid Principal Stevens nixed half of my ideas, but these are what have been approved."

"Can't you see what the dance is going to look like already? What's with all of the samples?"

With the face Alice gave me you would think I just admitted to murder. "Do you not know how my power works by now?"

She was excellent at making me feel ashamed of myself, something that always made Edward angry.

"I haven't made the decision so how would I know what it looks like if I don't even know what I want to do yet?"

I shook my head at the clutter of words Alice threw at me. "Gotcha." I didn't, but it was easier to just pretend I did.

I found it easier over the next three months to be around Jake and Renesmee, hoping whatever had been bothering my subconscious had left for good. They were actually perfect for each other; much more perfect than Jake and I could have _ever _been. I remember Renee explaining to me during a visit Edward and I took to Florida that the way we moved around each other was comparable to magnets; an energy field. It wasn't until now did I understand what she meant.

On one of the few days Jacob was not gracing us with his presence, Alice had volunteered Renesmee and me to help with the finishing touches of the winter formal.

"Like this?" Nessie held up a perfectly arranged bouquet.

Alice squinted her eyes, an expression that should normally be reserved for important decisions, not over a floral arrangement. "A little less green and a lot more white. And oh! You forgot the stones!"

I looked back and forth between my daughter's project and mine, throwing down the sad excuse for flowers on the table. "I would think by now you would know this really isn't my strong suit."

"Go ahead and paint or whatever you do." She waved me off without a second thought and turned back to pester Renesmee with questions.

I went into my studio, which for some reason held no appeal for me at the moment. Edward teased that I was going to go through hobbies as often as Esme does. I instead organized the blank canvas and my paints and took down a picture I had hung on the wall, deciding it would look good in the hallway by our bedroom.

He didn't even need to breath or say a word when he walked in. I could smell his honey-lilac-and-sun scent from a mile away.

I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, his arms slipping easily around me. "What are you doing in here?"

"Hiding from Alice."

He laughed. "Understandable. Not up for painting tonight?"

I actually had been brewing a plan, one that I couldn't tell anyone or else they would have accidentally spilled the beans to my mind reading husband, and he had just left that door wide open.

"I'm kind of thirsty. Do you think we could hunt tonight?"

Edward had turned me around facing him. "I think I could manage getting away from here with my wife for a little while."

"I was thinking," I hoped my hesitation wouldn't give me away, "there was that national forest in Washington that Emmett was talking about. We could go there. Wenatchee?"

For a quarter of a second I was worried that he saw right through me, but he kissed me on the forehead and smiled. "Whatever you want."

"Let's not say anything to Renesmee, she's exhausted and I want her to sleep tonight."

"Deal."

I lead the way back to the living room as Alice was cleaning up her mess. "Where's Jake?"

Nessie pouted, something she was still very good at. "The one night we can go out and he has a late class."

"Yes, it would be," I heard Edward say from behind me. I had obviously missed a thought.

"Nosy," Renesmee snapped.

"Why don't you at least attempt to get some sleep tonight?" Alice suggested.

For once without an argument, Renesmee went off to her room. Edward had been spying on her dreams, getting to know Ramses better. I was pretty sure he was warming up to Jake's theory; he could enter her mind through her dreams. These dreams worried me after Carlisle explained she hadn't been really _sleeping _while she had them, so it cut her night's sleep in half.

We waited a while before taking off through the darkness towards Washington. I didn't want to seem too eager, but at the same time I was praying my plan wasn't going to be foiled by bad timing. I knew we had to go as soon as Alice looked over at me, her eyes wide as if to say _are you crazy? _I probably was.

I was pleased at my idea for hunting grounds; Emmett was right about the plentiful bears and few cougars we found. I actually saw a grizzly, but ever since I found out they were on the threatened species list, I refused to eat them. Edward scoffed at my stance.

If the night was going to work at all I knew had to begin the distractions as soon as possible, or... well I wasn't sure what would happen.

Running through the woods, hand in hand, I stopped short pulling Edward back to me, pinning me against a tree.

"We're alone," I whispered, and ran my fingers down his cheek.

"Seriously?" He raised an eyebrow.

Okay, so I was seducing my husband with ulterior motives, but it wasn't for myself that I was doing it for.

I pulled his head to mine, our lips molding to each other. I felt his hands wander with more intenseness and mine followed.

It was a while before we both got up, laughing when we noticed the muddy ground had given us both a very naturalistic look. "Shucks, looks like we'll need a shower." I brought my lips close to his but refused to kiss him.

I had become pretty knowledgeable when it came to reading the stars, and could at least estimate what time it was, which should be _plenty _of time.

We weren't even in the house yet when Edward stopped dead in his tracks.

"Edward?" I looked up at him innocently.

"Isabella Cullen, please tell me you didn't have a hand in this?"

"I didn't?" I tried to hide my smile.

I could tell he was about to bolt off into her room which only gave me about thirty seconds to explain myself.

"You're ridiculous Edward! Hypocritical! You snuck up to my bedroom every night for years."

He rolled his eyes at me and was about to say something but I cut him off.

"Not only _that, _but on many occasions we feigned a sleepover so I could be at _your _house. So don't even start, I don't want to hear it!"

I hadn't noticed how many octaves my voice went up during my rant until I saw our parents and siblings on the porch.

Edward had gone silent, trying to read the thoughts of the couple in the room. For once I didn't block him, hoping endlessly that they were both _sleeping _as I had instructed Jacob to do.

"Hmph." I knew I wouldn't get anything out of him for the rest of the night and went to shower, leaving him to mope around the house.

By the next morning Edward had come around a little to my point of view, especially after he spent most of the night speaking to his father. If there was anyone's opinion Edward took seriously, it was Carlisle's.

I felt him tense up as soon as we heard Renesmee's door open. When they walked out, Nessie was glowing, something I hadn't seen in her in a while. Edward took one sharp breath.

_Edward, calm,_ I told him, patting his hand to ease him.

"Sleep well?" My sister came into the room, more excited than the rest of us to see them. She questioned me all night on how I kept this a secret for so long, something I refused to reveal.

"Yes, Alice, thanks so much for asking," Renesmee snapped at her. "I had the strangest dream though. I was in a tent... and in a sleeping bag. I was cold - really crazy because I don't know what being cold feels like. Dad and Jake were there. It was so weird."

In the background I heard Jake drop his fork. As it rang on the floor I had flashbacks to the night in the tent. The cold. Jake forcing his way into my sleeping bag before I froze to death. The conversation they had while I was in my semi-dream state. They both loved me. They were going to fight for me.

Edward's hand clamped down on mine.

"I wish I could dream. I don't even get to remember dreaming from when I was human." Alice attempted to change the topic, but she couldn't completely hide her concern. I still saw the suspicious in Renesmee's eyes.

Edward furiously left the house once Renesmee was distracted and went out to the garage. I followed him, hearing Alice demand a shopping trip to get Nessie a dress for the dance. When they were well on their way to the mall Jake finally came out to us, carefully, his eyes never leaving Edward's face.

"I'm...I'm sorry." He looked like a puppy that had just been scolded. "It must have been the situation that conjured it...the memory was in my dream, even though I don't remember it."

"Just another reason why you shouldn't be in close confines with my daughter!" Edward raged. For a split second I thought he could possibly have color to his alabaster features.

"You know you can't keep us a part, Edward," Jake growled. I could see his body pulsing, the inner wolf in him becoming prominent. I constantly worried that he would lose his control if there was a threat against Renesmee.

"What if it had been a...different memory?" I couldn't say it. I couldn't bring myself to even speak about our kiss, but both men knew what I meant.

"What do you want from me?" Jake sounded pained. "I love her. I love her and you know it. Do you want to tell her? Do you _want _to get it out in the open? Make _her _decide if she will hate me afterwards?"

_That will destroy them both, Edward, _I told him.

He knew it would and with that we would be destroyed as well. The imprinting connected

Renesmee and Jacob in a way we could barely comprehend, but the kinship between all of us went beyond that. We were bound by something other worldly; something unexplainable.

"Of course I don't want that," Edward lowered his head. "I'm just..."

He didn't need to finish. "We all are," I squeezed his hand.

"I'll back off, I promise," Jacob whispered, his voice cracking.

Edward closed his eyes. "Just let me think about it, okay? Just give me some time."

I was so excited while I got dressed for the formal that I had actually gotten around Alice's foresight. I was well aware she would not be so happy about it.

I smoothed out my black dress in the full-length mirror. My hair, still undone, was something I would need Alice's help with.

"You are..." I heard Edward behind me. "Well, there are no words."

I was in his arms before I could reply, his hands cupping my face. He began to kiss me in earnest, telling me he never wanted to stop.

"How about we skip this dance?" He was now hitting the spot on my neck making me moan.

I pulled back, taking all of my willpower. "If you want to skip it, _you _can face Alice."

Without another word he walked me out to the living room. Alice was one little one you didn't want to challenge.

"What are you wearing?" Alice looked like she was about to have a heart attack.

"You picked it out for me, Alice. You of all people should approve." I could not stop smiling. This was the second time in a week I had gotten something by her.

"How did you get this passed me?"

Edward wrapped his arms around me and gave a big barrel laugh. "She pulled a Victoria; didn't make a decision until you got back."

Her name - even years after I had been turned into a powerful vampire – used to send shivers up my spine. Then one day when we were confronted by a lookalike Russian vampire, something clicked; some kind of matriarchal instinct. Since then, my human memories of the redheaded evil were a joke.

"Seriously though Alice, this is a three thousand dollar dress, it isn't made to be worn only once. Now why don't you do my hair?"

While Renesmee got ready, a now content Alice was putting my long dark hair up in a sophisticated twist. I allowed her to make the choice this time, hoping she would forgive me for earlier.

Alice and Jasper left early to help set up for the dance while we waited for Jake to come see Renesmee before we left, per her request. I wish she understood why we hadn't let him stay over the rest of the week; I could tell every morning she was more miserable than the next. I could barely grasp onto the now faint nights that Edward would leave to go hunting, waking up to only find his love notes to me. I always woke up feeling a bit empty.

When Jacob walked in he had a mixture of negative emotions on his face the second he saw Nessie. I felt Edward tighten his arm around me. My daughter looked like she was about to cry, and the room was silent.

"Doesn't she look amazing, Jacob?" I broke the thickness, but no one else was speaking.

"I have to go get my bag," Renesmee choked.

When she was in her room Edward stood directly in front of Jacob, and even though he was several inches shorter than him, he made himself very intimidating. "I understand but she can't read your mind from across the room. Go make this right, _now._"

Jake walked off following her, and I looked at Edward asking with my eyes for an explanation.

"He doesn't want her to leave the house like that when he can't be with her."

"Hmmm, definitely sounds like someone I know." I kissed him, relieved he was slowly becoming more understanding.

I shouldn't have done it but I listened into the rest of their conversation.

_"Renesmee, you look beautiful. You are the most stunning woman I've ever seen before in my life. I love you and I am so very glad you are mine."_

Something ripped in me again. There were flashbacks from the night in the tent when I had been talking in my sleep. I had said _Jacob, my Jacob. _My Jacob.

When they walked back to the front room as I was always a horrible liar, and my daughter was no fool. Jake was standing behind her and he saw me. He knew me. I was quite the entire way to the dance, trying to sort out my thoughts.

"Well, this place definitely screams _winter wonderland,_" Edward said as we took in the huge blue and silver room.

"Thank you!" Alice squealed. Even with her hyper personality she was gorgeous in her silver couture gown. "I did what I could." I knew she was disappointed that she didn't get the dream dance she had hoped for and that was confirmed when Edward laughed. "Oh and Nessie, I won't forget your promise!" she added as my daughter tried to sneak away.

"What promise?"

"I told her I'd help her out - it was either that or be hounded for not having a date."

"Well at least you're learning to pick your battles." It had taken me way to long and I learned that lesson the hard way.

For a while I stood with Edward and Jasper off to the side watching the students admire Alice's creation and crowd the table of food.

"Jasper," Edward leaned over. "You may want to go save Alice's volunteers before they being a riot."

Jasper sighed, he never was one for many words, and walked over to Alice to calm everyone down.

I was scanning the rest of the room, seeing Renesmee over by the door looking only semi-amused while speaking with Grace and Marcus. Without warning Edward pulled me onto the dance floor, not giving me any chance to pull away. At least I didn't step on his feet anymore.

He was so impossibly perfect, he could talk me into almost anything he wanted.

"I think I'm going to have to send you in Alice's direction and go console our daughter." Edward whispered.

"Is she pouting being away from Jacob?"

"Mmmhmm." He kissed me lovingly on the lips.

While I listened to Alice commanding me to fix the trees, he pulled an unexpected Renesmee onto the dance floor.

Again I shouldn't have been eavesdropping on their conversation, but my curiosity got the best of me.

_"My relationship with Jake has been rocky from the beginning, long before you were born." _Edward replied to a comment I hadn't heard.

_"Because of the whole vampire versus werewolf thing?"_

_"Pretty much."_

Edward was editing. It went beyond a species. A part of me so wanted to tell her that their relationship was rocky because of me. Because they both loved me. Because I loved both of them.

I was eager to get home, but couldn't help but be awed by the snow that had fallen during the few hours of the dance.

"You knew this would happen, didn't you?" Jasper asked.

"Edward knew too," she tattled.

"It's beautiful." I reached for Edward's hand.

"You're beautiful," he said in my ear.

I couldn't help but notice Renesmee looking at us. I hoped Edward would tell me later what she was thinking.

Edward noticed that I was jumpy on our way home, but didn't say anything aloud. Jacob's scent was normally so prominent in the house it wasn't until we reached the front door did Edward realize my third trick of the week.

"Hmph!" He glared at me even though I pushed him towards our room. Renesmee had noticed only moments later what her father's problem was and she was in her bedroom before I could close our door.

"Isabella," Edward's back was to me. "I told you and Jacob I wanted some time."

"And you took time, except I think it was too much time."

"Do you really want to start?"

I was terrified of this conversation, and I wanted to hide.

"No." I was burying my head in his back. "I love you."

No matter what problems had been tormenting me, there was no escaping the pure and simple fact that I loved Edward more than anything. There was no arguing that.

When Edward turned towards me he looked angry, but instead of chewing me out, which is what I was prepared for, he kissed me with a need I hadn't felt from him in a long time. He picked me up so my legs were around him, my hands working his tie off of his neck and the button from his starched white shirt. Before we found the bed, which was only two seconds later, our bare bodies were wrapped together, our breathing heavy and quick.

"Bella..." Edward began to say something but his lips found mine again and there was no more talking.


	15. Home Again: Bella & Renesmee

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**Chapter 8 - Home Again**

**Renesmee**

Jacob was the only one that had been back to Washington since we moved to Oregon. The last time I had been back was for the funeral of Jake's dad, Billy. My memories of Billy are very clear, even though we had never spent much time together. Sometimes Jake will make a facial expression and in it I can see Billy. I pointed it out once, but Jake's face fell and his eyes glazed over. That was the last time I ever brought up his father.

Grandpa Charlie had been bugging my parents for the last year since we returned to the cloudy northwest for a visit, but they were stalling for as long as possible. The reason for putting off the visit was, as usual, me. I was full grown at eighteen years old, yet I was born only seven years ago. Grandpa Charlie could only handle so much, even with Sue there to give him support.

I don't know what changed their minds, but as soon as school ended my dad announced that we were going to visit Forks. All I heard was we were going home.

"We won't actually be in Forks, Renesmee," my mom reminded me while I ran quickly to pack. "You may not be recognized, but the rest of us will be. It hasn't been long enough."

"What about La Push?"

"We've decided that you and Jacob will make the trip up there. Again, the entire tribe is not in on the Quileute secret."

There had been no more Quileute children changing into werewolves once we left Washington, but in those few years after the confrontation with the Volturi the number of the packs, two packs actually, had risen to twenty-three.

Jake had gone back several times over the years to oversee his pack, since technically he was still the Alpha male. Leah, who had been his Beta, decided soon after we moved to leave La Push and go to college. She hadn't phased since, and the only contact she ever made was with Sue. She never even spoke to Seth anymore. I had a feeling there was something else there that haunted her, perhaps the death of her father, to run her off so far from her family.

With Jake and Leah both away, Seth became his Beta. Although Seth was younger than Quil, Embry, and some of the other boys, he had been loyal to Jacob from the beginning and that loyalty meant a lot to Jake.

To attempt to come off as humanly normal as possible, we took Emmett's new SUV for the four hour -- two because my dad was driving -- ride to Port Angeles.

"You really won't come?" I begged Carlisle and Esme.

"I'm afraid I could be recognized even in Port Angeles," Carlisle put his arm around my shoulders. "Besides, you four need some time with your families."

Esme squeezed me tightly, telling me to mind my parents while away. She pulled back from me and looked directly at me. "Don't stay too long, I'm going to need help in the garden." Her eyes may match the rest of my family, but I swear there was a kindness and compassion in them that one could never find anywhere else.

Jasper shook Jake and Edward's hands after loading up the rest of the suitcases, and Alice whimpered dramatically as she held on to her sister.

"What am I doing to do?" She wailed.

"Go and visit Rosalie in Portland?" Bella suggested. "We're not even going to be gone for two weeks you know."

Alice sighed again and shrugged, "Not the same."

"Alright, we need to get on the road!" Edward took Bella by the elbow as Jasper pried Alice off of her.

I climbed into the back seat and slid next to Jake. "Are you excited?"

"Yup," he said shortly. He was clearly not excited.

"Liar."

"I love you."

Damn him. "Don't change the subject," I scolded yet my heart was obviously beating much more rapidly than only moments before.

"Ahem," Edward got behind the wheel.

Jake rolled his eyes and took my hand. _I love you._

I could see my dad's glaring eyes in the rearview mirror, but I only grinned back.

My mom turned back and looked at me for only a millisecond, but I knew what she meant.

_We're alone_, I told Jake.

Testing out my theory Jake nodded his head, my dad jerked up and looked at us again knowing he had missed a telepathic conversation.

"Bella," he said curtly.

"Yes, Edward?"

"Hmph." And that was all we would get for the first hour of the trip.

"Do you think we could maybe see the house?" I pleaded. "Carlisle said no one lives in the main house and I want to see the cottage! Please, can we see the cottage?"

I could tell my mom was pondering it, knowing she probably wanted to go back as badly as I did. "We'll see."

"Are you going to show me around La Push, Jake? I barely got to see any of it. Please?"

"I told you we would. Don't I always keep my word?" As he replied he moved in closer and kissed behind my ear.

"For Christmas sakes!" Edward swerved the car across the highway. Several cars barely missed us and each other, tires began to screech in all directions and horns were blaring. All the while the chaos on the road was going on we were safely on the shoulder of the road.

"Edward!" My mom smacked him. "Don't you ever put human lives in that kind of danger again!"

He ignored my mom, something he never did, and turned his attention back to us. "Did you ever see me kissing Bella in front of Charlie?"

"Uh, well no?" I was confused.

"It's rude! We. Are. Your. Parents. Be respectful!"

"Edward," my mom put her hand on his arm.

"Don't," he hissed. One of the scariest things to me was when my parents argued.

Jake pulled a few inches away from me and leaned against the window. Now it was my turn to glare at my dad and I pulled myself back to Jake's side and wedged myself under his arm.

"Hmph!" I mimicked. It was my turn to be silent for the rest of the trip.

I hadn't realized I had fallen asleep until an oddly familiar smell filled my nose.

"Do you smell that?" I accidentally knocked my head into Jake's elbow from my sudden movement. "Ow." I had definitely learned over the years that I was quite as immune to pain as Jake and my family.

"Nay, watch yourself!" Jake kissed the top of my head.

I rubbed it ignoring him. "Am I crazy or does it have a smell?"

"We all smell it, Nessie." I guess my dad and I were speaking again.

"Home!" I grinned, leaning over Jake to look out the window. Okay, it wasn't quite home, but close enough.

We had rented a large house for the weeks we were visiting, conveniently one that backed up to the woods. Grandpa Charlie and Sue were meeting us there.

"Sue has told Charlie as much as she could to prepare him," my mom turned to Jake and me. Sue was allowed to be in on our secret world being a mother of two werewolves and holding a seat on the Quileute counsel. Grandpa on the other hand, couldn't know. There were two and only two outcomes if the Volturi found out; be changed or be killed.

"Renesmee, we need you to stand back until we tell you to. Charlie may have a heart attack if an eighteen year old runs up and calls him Grandpa."

"And," Edward interjected, "for his sake the two of you are not together. Understood?"

I was shaking when Jake took my hand helping me out of the truck. In front of me was a beautiful blue house with a white roof and matching shutters. A wrap around porch was complete with a swing that one would find in a turn of the century colonial. While I took in the view I could hear the footsteps coming from the second story and Sue's light and happy voice call, "They're here!"

"Dad!" My mom took the steps leading up to the porch by two. She was at the screen door before Grandpa had even stepped out.

"Hey Bells," he replied as they embraced, he flinched at her cold skin but still wouldn't let go. I could tell by his voice he was holding back tears. "You look... well you look good." That would be code for_ she looks the same_. "Edward, how are you?"

My dad walked up and shook his hand. "Very well Charlie, thank you."

"Jake!" Charlie grabbed Jacob and pulled him in for a hug, again, the abnormal body temperature drew out a minute reaction. "It's too good to see you. I cannot believe how much you look like your father, really, you do."

"Thanks Charlie," he smiled. I was probably the only one that could see the pain behind it.

"Where's Nessie? Where is my granddaughter?" I was still standing near the truck, terrified to leave.

Sue had been hugging my mom and left to stand by Charlie and took his hand.

My dad nodded at me. "Hi Grandpa," I said quietly.

Charlie cocked his head to the side and squinted his eyes. "Renesmee?"

I could hear his heart beating faster, Sue moving closer to him and now gripping his arm.

"Yeah, it's me." I looked over at my parents and Jake, all of them just as nervous as I was.

"Well," he cleared his throat, "you definitely have some crazy growth spurts."

And that was it.

He awkwardly walked down the steps and took me into his arms. "I've missed you kid."

"Missed you too, Grandpa."

Sue already had dinner cooking, my mom helping to set the table while the rest of us sat down in the living room.

"So, tell me," Charlie sat down, "how is Oregon Nessie? Can it really be better than Forks?" I think he was teasing me, but I couldn't be sure.

"It's good," I shrugged, praying he wouldn't ask me what grade I was in. I sat down next to Jake, close enough for our legs to touch but no more than that. I could see my dad glance our way every few minutes.

"And are you both enjoying graduate school?" He asked turning to Edward.

Poor Grandpa, he really would have heart failure if he knew they were in high school -- again.

"Straight A's Dad." My mom came into the living room and sat on the arm of the couch next to him.

"That's my girl," he put his hand on her leg. I could tell he was uncomfortable with her stone skin and casually slid it back into his lap. "And you Jake?"

"Just finished my second year of college," he grinned.

"Your dad would be proud of you, son."

Jake only nodded.

"Dinner's on the table!" Sue poked her head into the room.

Dutifully, my parents filled their plates with food, moving it around as they were so accustom to in human company. Sue knew exactly why they were not eating, and I couldn't be sure, but I thought I had caught Grandpa on a few occasions looking at their uneaten yet messy plates. Even if he had seen through the farce, he was probably to afraid to even ask. Need to know basis, he always said.

"Are you visiting La Push at all?" Sue asked.

My mom winced, almost as if the question hurt her. "Nessie and Jake are going to visit."

"Seth is dying to see all of you," Charlie mentioned with a mouthful of food. "Are you two sure you won't go? Seth thinks the world of you, Edward."

Now it was my dad's turn to look sad. Seth had an unusual reverence towards my dad from the very beginning, looking up to him as a hero, never an enemy.

"Maybe we will," Bella nodded, but I knew they wouldn't.

I was thrilled with the idea of going to La Push, but there was one place I wanted to see even more.

Charlie and Sue had gone to run some errands leaving us to speak freely for the first time since we arrived.

"I want to go see our house," I stood confidently in front of my parents. "Tonight, while they're asleep, can we?"

It didn't matter that my dad's mind reading only went one way, or that my mom was gifted with a shield. They needed no special abilities to read each other.

"I'd like to go," my mom said, almost whispering.

My dad sighed and nodded. He had a hard time saying no to my mom.

We all sat by the fire that night, catching up on what was going on in Forks. Grandpa had seen Mrs. Newton at the sporting goods store they still owned. She told him how Mike had moved out east and was going to law school.

"Seems like they see him less than I get to see you," he added. All I knew about Mike Newton was that he was relentless when it came to dating my mom.

I wondered if that was the other love she had been talking about?

It took all of thirty minutes for Charlie to go through what felt like every single event in Forks since our last visit years ago.

"Are you going to see Angela?" Charlie inquired.

I remembered the e-mail I read from my mom's old friend and the sorrow I had seen when she had to explain to me why she was slowly cutting off contact with her. Bella's eye grew wide at the unexpected question, not quite sure how to answer it.

"Dad," she said carefully, "who did you tell that we were coming into town?"

"It was kind of short notice, so really only my new deputy. I hadn't really seen anyone -- been working late hours. Why?"

"According to my friends from high school, we are in Europe for graduate school, not in Oregon."

My grandpa's eyes looked frightened for the first time since we had arrived. This would be one of those need to know basis things.

"And your parents?" He turned to Edward.

"They're in Astoria; Carlisle is working there."

Charlie was nodding, but it looked more like he was rocking back in forth, trying to get a grasp on his thoughts. Sue began to rub his back, I had a feeling she did that a lot whenever he got news about his daughter and the family she married into.

"Well then," he changed the topic. "How is Alice? Does she live in Europe also?"

"If someone asks, which I doubt they will, she lives in Virginia with Jasper."

"I'll ask you again, Bella, how is Alice?" He had heard enough supernatural excuses for now and Alice was always his favorite Cullen sibling.

"Alice is... Alice," Bella smiled, thinking about her sister. "Happy and hyper as always."

"Good. Good."

The small talk droned on until I began to yawn. The fire was down to smoldering ashes and I could feel the cool gusts of the early Washington summer through the screened door.

"You should head to bed, Renesmee," my mom suggested, which really meant _get a couple hours of sleep before we take our trip._

"Goodnight Grandpa. Goodnight Sue." I kissed them both on the cheek. I saw Jake looking at me longingly, wishing he could follow me upstairs. I wished so too. It would be first the night in a long time that we wouldn't be sharing a bed.

I hadn't taken a chance to actually inspect the room I had tossed my bag into until I flipped the switch. The walls were a rich burgundy and went well with the jade bedding and dark cherry furniture -- not my style at all. It made me frown. The trip itself was something I was dying to do, but a part of me -- perhaps the inner seven year old -- was frustrated that pretenses needed to be up kept and I couldn't enjoy this fully having to pretend not to be with Jake. _It's only two weeks, it's only two weeks._

I decided not to change into pajamas, knowing I'd only need to scrounge around looking for clothes in a few hours time. Jeans weren't all that comfortable to sleep in, but I just dealt with it.

Having heightened senses was definitely not on Grandpa Charlie's list of possible traits for me because I could hear him speaking to my parents downstairs. I was trying to listen in when the door creaked opened.

I knew I couldn't say a word or my father would be upstairs in a half second, not caring if he exposed his super speed to Charlie. Of course, the moment Jake found me in the darkness there were no need for words.

_My dad?_

_Your mom is all over that._

So I let him kiss me then, leaning back onto the bed, his massive body towering over mine.

_I didn't think this would be so hard to fake._ I shuttered as he brush my hair out of my eyes.

_Believe me, I know._

There was a hidden meaning in his words but I was too wrapped up in him to dwell on it.

He rolled over next to me and we listened to Charlie drill my parents about my education, my maturity level, and any other parental direction he believed they needed.

"She's got an incredible IQ, Charlie," my dad promised. "Beyond mine for sure."

"I just don't understand why you would be rushing her into high school!" I was grateful that topic didn't come up while I was in the room.

"Dad, be real, does she look like she belongs in middle school?"

Then there was silence. I wondered how much they could confront Charlie with before he wanted out; how long he could stand the secrets.

_I better go back into my room before we get caught_, Jake got up off of the bed.

I sprang up throwing my arms around him. _No, please stay!_

_You need at least a few hours of sleep before you leave._

I was frantic. _You aren't coming?_

_No, this is something you need to do as a family. _

Jake kissed me on the forehead and was out the door before I could blink.

I'm not sure when I fell asleep or for how long, but my mom was standing over me when I opened my eyes.

"It's 3am," she whispered. "I left a note for Charlie in case he wakes up, telling him we wanted to see the sunrise."

Lame excuse, but he'd probably buy it -- or at least be too afraid to question it.

We traveled on foot through the woods at lightening fast speed, leaving all traces of our human facade behind us. It took us practically no time before the scent of Port Angeles changed to something even more familiar. Something I had known since the second I was born.

It was still the same faded white color as we had left it and the tall cedars still stood as body guards around the perimeter. We all stood there for a while taking it all in. The lawn and landscape were a little overgrown, but someone had obviously been doing an occasional pruning during our absence.

"Well?" My dad stretched out his hand and my mom placed hers inside.

The house was more for them, most of my memories were of the cottage. I saw my mom run her fingers down the front door lovingly, like she was saying hello to a dear friend.

The great house was even larger when it was empty. I cleared my throat and the echo between the walls seemed to go on forever. I casually walked around, remembering the antics I used to get into, mainly laughing to myself.

I soaked in the past and finally found myself outside on the porch again, looking out over the yard where Jacob used to play with me for endless hours.

It had been only a few years since we left, yet a different lifetime all at the same time.

I heard them come silently down the stairs and out the front door. "Renesmee? Are you ready to go see your home?" My mom put her hands on my shoulders.

Yes, I was so ready, because as Bella had mentioned, it was my home. Their lives may be split, but the essence of my life in Forks was not here in this house.

I could have been blindfolded for all I cared, I still knew exactly where to go. In comparison to anywhere else I've lived it was tiny, but beyond it's stone walls and wild vines was the most perfect place in the world.

The door opened silently; to my surprise the hinges showed no signs of rust. I believe I touched every wall, every surface. I closed my eyes picturing where everything use to be... and will be, one day.

"Maybe," my dad said in reply to my thoughts.

"But not for a long time though," I added sullenly.

He squeezed my shoulder. "If you compare it to forever, it doesn't seem all that long."

I sat in my room for a while, on the floor leaning on the wall my bed used to be against. I must have gotten lost in thought because my dad peeked his head in.

"Where's your mom?"

I shrugged, realizing I hadn't seen her in quite sometime.

"I'll be back, I'm going to go track her down."

Chances were that she went to go find our meadow -- well technically their meadow, but I was included being their daughter.

After ten minutes and realizing that no one was coming back, I followed both of their scents deeper into the woods. The farther I got from the house, the clearer the destination of the path became to me. It didn't matter that I hadn't been there since I was four months old; the memories were burnt into my mind and had taken center stage in my nightmares my entire life.

If there was anything that would haunt us forever, this would be it.

The field.

**Bella**

It seemed to take forever before Charlie and Sue finally decided to turn in for the night. My mind was on overload trying to take in exactly what had happened over the last twelve hours.

Charlie had taken to the change in Renesmee like a champ. Edward did let me know that his mental voice was going a mile a minute, mainly repeating his famous words _don't know, don't care_. On top of his granddaughter's new look, he even seemed more opened to Jacob, who in an attempt to keep us in Forks longer after Renesmee's birth, transformed to wolf form in front of Charlie to try and hint as to what else was out there.

Edward climbed onto the bed, hovering over me with a devious smile. He leaned down but just before he reached my lips I blocked him with my finger.

"Not with Charlie down the hall."

My husband sighed. "What if we were really quiet?"

Saying no to Edward, the most gorgeous man to walk the earth, took every ounce of self control that I had.

"I'll make it up to you," I pulled him back towards me and whispered.

"Please?" Edward turned my head and began to kiss behind my ear making me shutter.

He won this time.

We were kept, um busy, the next few hours and I had to eventually tear myself away from Edward's embrace when I noticed the red digital numbers on the alarm clock.

"I'm going to go wake Nessie up." I had to physically push him back on the bed and fight him for my shirt before he gave in.

I almost didn't want to wake her when I saw her sleeping soundly with her soft angelic features, but her eyes flew open before I could sneak back out.

"It's 3am. I left a note for Charlie in case he wakes up, telling him we wanted to see the sunrise."

I tried to ready myself to see it on the run towards Forks, but I don't think any amount of time could prepare me. It was still there, plucked right from my day dreams, standing as it did the first day I ever walked up the front stairs when Edward brought me over to meet his family... nine years ago.

"Well?" Edward looked at me with nostalgia, probably the same look I had in my eyes. I gave him my hand and we walked up to the porch, the front door facing us. I ran my hand down the white washed frame before finding the brass knob.

All at once a million memories rushed at me in the form of sights, sounds, and smells. I organized them all in my head, allowing me to feel them one at a time.

Edward followed me, but didn't say a word. He let me walk into the dining room where the ultimate vote of my mortal fate was decided.

_I looked towards Edward this time; it would be better to get his opinion out of the way."Do you want me to join your family?"_

_"Not in that way, you're staying human."_

_"Alice?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Jasper?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Rosalie?"_

_"No."_

I grabbed for his hand when we reached the library where the black and red pain of Renesmee's birth and my transformation had taken place.

_"Get him OUT!" I screamed. "He can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"_

As we walked up the stairs I saw Renesmee wandering around aimlessly; I knew this place held far fewer memories for her than it did for me and Edward.

Faded rectangles were proof that works of art once hung there, a few pieces of furniture that did not travel with us were covered in sheets that held a thin layer of dust.

Edward was now leading me up the third story to the very end of the hallway to his bedroom. I could picture the giant wrought iron bed with it's delicate, impermeable roses.

_"Not to bring on the ire prematurely, but do you mind telling me what it is about this bed that you object to?"_

The shelves, now empty, which once held Edward's massive music collection were still there. The giant windowed wall looking south over the Sol Duc river and Olympic mountain range allowed me to see the sun to the east beginning to kiss the tops of the trees.

"It seems like such a long time ago," I whispered, touching the glass as if I was reaching out into our past. I was certain I didn't need to qualify my thoughts to my husband; I was positive he knew what I was thinking.

"You know," Edward's lips were practically touching my ear, and his arms around my waist, "I have been immortal for ninety-six years and until you came into my life, I had no measure of time. Now every year, every month, every day... every single moment means something... thank you for making eternity mean something."

I turned and looked at him, the man I had given my life for and the man that had given it right back. I tried to concentrate on his golden eyes, his perfect features, his bronze hair... but my head was being clouded with other memories of the past.

"Let's go find our daughter," I smiled as strongly as I could, thankful he couldn't read my mind.

Deep in thought, Renesmee sat on the porch. Edward smiled gently, a hint as to the calmness of her thoughts.

"Renesmee? Are you ready to go see your home?" I put my hand on her hot shoulder.

Her eyes brightened and she raced towards the cottage. I was not in such a rush, keeping a slower pace with Edward, but once the smell of the honeysuckle reached me I became just as excited.

And there it was, as it should always have been and will be--my little fairytale. The new daylight was almost reaching through the trees, sending the faintest glow to danced off of the lavender-grey stones. The honeysuckle had taken over most of the walls, and the flower boxes were bare, but it was still home.

_"Esme thought we might like a place of our own for a while..."_

_"You're giving me a house for my birthday?"_

_"Us. And it's no more than a cottage. I think the word house implies more legroom."_

_"No knocking my house."_

I watched Renesmee run through the house, taking in the first years of her life, as I did the same; the first years of my immortal life.

I'm not sure how I snuck away from my ever alert Edward, but he was deeply involved in a few old pieces of art that had oddly enough been forgotten. I could hear Renesmee in her old room, silent in thought. Neither of them noticed my absence.

I knew I should not go where I was headed, but memories of pain acted like a hangnail; I couldn't help but pick at it. I had to go. I had to see it as badly as I had to see our house.

I did not run, but walked at a quick human pace, and as I did, the pure fear of inevitability I remember so well began to rise up inside of me and burn my freezing cold body. My spacious mind could no longer hold on to time; I had no idea how long I had been walking for. The terror had overtaken me. I tried to remember why this was my home. I tried to think back through the muddied human memories of our meadow and of our triumph against the newborns. I tried to remember Edward climbing in my window every night unbeknownst to Charlie. I tried to remember my wedding. I tried to remember our little stone cottage with it's lavender walkway.

Then the forest ended and I was faced with both the past and our possible future all at once.

The field.

Every tree still stood as it should. The boulders that Benjamin had moved hadn't left their new resting places. I could hear the same river, the same birds, the same wind. Then my mind was clouded over and I could see the grey. The mist of black and grey cloaks floating towards us through freshly fallen January snow. An army with only two motives: acquire and destroy. Their expressions had been emotionless, their eyes a blood thirsty red.

I could sense Edward besides me, I could feel my family and friends flanking us. Behind me I could hear the panting of the pack.

Out of my memories I could pick each of them out: Jane, Alec, Cauis, Marcus, Demetri... Aro. I could see the guard and their witnesses. Those that were there only to witness our trial... and our death.

_I love you_, Renesmee had said to me.

_I love you too. More than my own life_, I replied before putting her on Jacob's back and telling them to run.

We had survived then, but would we the second time around? There would be no peace the next time I would look into Aro's clouded crimson eyes. There would be no need for witnesses, there would be no accusations or trial. There will be a battle, and there will be death.

The empty vortex in my chest whirl with shaky breaths. My eyes, absent of tears, were twitching.

It would either be the end of the Volturi.

Or the end of us.

"Bella? Bella, love, what's wrong?"

I let myself fall back into reality straight into Edward's arms. Somewhere across the way I could have sworn I could almost hear Jane's shrieking scream...

Even at our lightning pace I could feel Edward's worried eyes on me. Worried because he had never seen me react like that in a very long time. Where had the matriarchal courage I had found in Elkins gone? Where was this fear coming from now?

The sun was up now and very few clouds dotted the sky allowing the light to shine diamonds down upon me and Edward. Luckily when we approached the Port Angeles house I heard no signs of Charlie downstairs and Sue was in the kitchen at the other end of the first floor (not that it matter if she saw us).

"How was the sun rise?" Charlie came down the stairs loudly.

It took me longer that usual for my white lie to click in my head so Renesmee had to speak for me. "It was beautiful, Grandpa!" Her enthusiasm was extremely believable; she definitely did not inherit my bad acting skills.

"Breakfast!" Sue called. I could smell the eggs, bacon, and even the orange juice.

"I'll... I'll be right back," I stammered, another unusual immortal trait. Edward gave me another look of concern but I urged him to go "eat" with the family.

Jacob was still in his room; I could smell him as I walked up the stairs.

"Jake?" I knocked.

"Hiya Bells," he grinned while putting a shirt over his extremely muscular torso. He took a second look at my face and frowned. "What's wrong?"

"I just needed to gather my thoughts away from my dad for a second."

I sat down on his bed cross-legged, realizing I hadn't just sat and talked with him in... years.

"You know Edward can hear you through me, right? Not all of us have a quirky secret brain like you do."

"Yeah." I stared at my hands, not even being able to smile at his joke. I felt guilty using my shield to hide conversations from Edward and tried to rarely do so. "He could hear us anyway... and it's nothing he hasn't picked up on."

"Wanna fill me in?"

"I feel like I'm falling a part over this whole the-Volturi-are-building-an-army-to-kill-us deal."

"Don't forget about the you're-queen-of-a-prophecy deal also," he kidded again, this time a smile slipped through my lips.

"I was so much more sure of myself in Elkins, what happened? I feel like an insignificant mortal again."

"The unknown always makes ya question things," Jake said matter-of-factly, sitting on the bed with me. "It'll be okay though, Bells."

"Will it?"

It was a rhetorical question but Jacob answered anyway in true Jacob fashion. "Yes, 'cause it has to."

_It has to be_. I wished I could have such an outlook on the future as Jake did.

"Now let's go eat!" He jumped off of the bed, his face freezing in a crooked smile. "Well, I guess you just watch, but you know what I mean."

I already knew what would await me in the kitchen before we stepped foot downstairs; Edward's eyes.

I lowered my shield. _There isn't anything else to talk about it._

His face turned up in a bit of annoyance. Charlie and Sue didn't pick up on it, but Renesmee did and she looked between us with questioning glances.

"So," Sue broke the silence, "when are you going up to La Push?"

"I talked to the guys," Jake said in between bites. "We were all going to do something tomorrow, but they're having a bonfire tonight. If it's alright--," he looked hesitant to finish his sentence,"--Nay and I may stay at Rachel's overnight."

Edward was over by the counter, pretending to drink some orange juice and I know I wasn't the only one who heard the glass in his had crack. Renesmee winced. I'll give Jake credit for being smart enough to ask in front of Charlie and Sue; Edward would seem irrational to say no.

"I don't see why not!" Charlie interjected before Edward could have his say. "How about you two?"

"We have over a week left, Dad, we'll get up there." I was lying, but that was just a part of my relationship with Charlie now.

My answer didn't seem to bother him one bit. Edward still hadn't relaxed.

_Please Edward,_ I begged. _For me? Jacob wouldn't go against our wishes, you know that._

He closed his eyes, taking a deep unnecessary breath and dumped the juice out in the sink, slipping the broken glass carefully into the trash without being seen.

"Sure," Edward finally said in a monotone voice with only a hint of distain.

"I'll go pack!" Renesmee jumped from her seat leaving her breakfast almost completely untouched. She was thirsty, not hungry; they were going today because she wanted to hunt.

The Renesmee-Jacob debacle only distracted Edward for a few minutes, his melancholy expression told me he was focusing back to the conversation he overheard with Jake.

I searched for something to say to him; something to make him feel better. Only one thing came to mind.

_Je t'aime de tout mon coeur._


	16. Footprints: Edward & Renesmee

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N: Make sure you read the note at the end of the chapter. Thanks! Oh and the last line in chapter 8 was something Edward said to Bella in LAF. It means I love you with all my heart.**

**Chapter 9 - Footprints**

**Renesmee**

My dad had avoided us while we got ready to leave for La Push. I was surprised how much his silence hurt me, and both my mom and Jacob could tell because I overheard each of them push Edward to come talk to me.

He refused.

"You're being a _child, _Edward," my mom lectured him. "You're going to have to accept their relationship and deal with it."

"Oh, because you have?"

But my mom was the one fighting for us. How could my dad say that to her? She's accepted us completely. Hasn't she? The tone of accusation in his voice made it sound like more than that.

"We'll talk about this later." I'm sure they knew I was listening.

Jacob then tried with another approach.

"We won't stay overnight, Edward, if it makes you uncomfortable. Nothing will happen to her though, and I _will _keep my promise to you and Bella."

_No funny business, bah. _

Edward mumbled something to the extent of _now I know how Charlie felt, _but sighed and gave in anyway. "No, it's fine, Jake. Promise."

So it was out of fatherly worry that my dad was upset, not because it was Jake, or me, or La Push. This made it easier for me to jump up and hug him before we left.

"Love you, Daddy."

He kissed my forehead and smiled. "Have fun."

My mom looked a little sad as we drove off. I know there was a part of her life of all of their lives before I was born, that they were hesitant to talk to me about and I was sure La Push had something to do with it.

I could smell the ocean by the time we got to the old Quileute-Cullen boundary line. I only knew we were there because Jake told me so. The line no longer existed by the time I was born.

"Your dad use to drop Bella off right here," he pointed to a particular spot on the road. "I'd wait in my car a few yards back. Your mom _hated _it."

"I'm glad you all became friends," I said looking out the window. "I wonder what would have happened if we had met and there was still the conflict. What would have happened to us?"

"Who knows." Jake's face held no emotion which I felt was an odd reaction I didn't even get a smile or comforting word that we would be together no matter what.

We parked the truck outside of Jake's old house which Rachel and Paul now live in and Jake seemed fine until we were only feet from the front door.

"I still think he's going to meet me at the door. Every time." He meant Billy.

"He loved you." I ran my hand down his arm and intertwined our fingers.

_And I left him. _

I had used reasonable deduction to figure out years ago that he felt guilty over leaving his dad. Jake moved with us to Elkins and then Billy got sick. He didn't even get to say goodbye before Billy fell into a coma.

"You guys made it!" Rachel opened the door with us at a stand still in front of it. She hugged her huge brother and then surprisingly, hugged me.

I always knew the history between my family and the Quileute tribe with the whole werewolf-versus-vampire conflict that had long since been dissolved, but even when we were back for Billy's funeral I felt like everyone was a wary around me.

Paul came up from behind his wife and shook Jake's hand and then turned to me.

"Good to see you, Nessie," he said. "I see you've grown." I saw him look me up and down I was probably a foot taller than when I was here last and well several years older.

Paul and Jake grabbed our overnight bags and I followed Rachel inside the Black house.

A little boy walked up on chubby legs, his dark complexion made me wonder if I was looking at a miniature Jacob. I knelt down to the floor and smiled at him, "Hi, I'm Nessie." Renesmee would be quite a mouthful for him.

"Billy!" The little boy exclaimed and I could see my faded memories of his grandfather there in his eyes, smiling at me. "I dis many!" He held up two little fingers, using his other hand to make sure the rest of his fingers stayed down. "You how many?"

I wasn't quite sure how to answer that, but Jake stepped in to save the awkward moment. "She's way too old for you buddy!" He scooped up the boy and hoisted him onto his back. Little Billy broke out in hysterical giggles bouncing up and down on the tall man's shoulders, egging him on.

"Hey Jake, you won't believe it," Paul called from the couch, "Seth imprinted! It was just a couple days ago. Finally he can shut up. That makes everyone but Leah. Can you believe they thought it was a rarity? Psh."

"What's imprinting?" I knew I was immediately out of the loop when the room went silent.

"It's long story, I'll explain it later so we don't need to bore Paul and Rachel," Jake said putting little Billy down and giving me a kiss on the cheek. He said it a little too quickly and the looks I was getting from his sister and brother-in-law were making me cautious of his words.

"Are you guys hungry?" Rachel was pulling out ingredients from the cabinets.

I grew uncomfortable, praying that Jake knew what to say. Friends or not, vampire dieting preferences were not completely excepted by the tribe, even though in wolf form they hunted as well. I attempted a debate with Jacob over it once. He explained that they just see it more as something a parasite does; not feeding from the animal, but off of it. I tried to argue my point but he said he doesn't see it that way anymore.

"We ate just before we hit the road so we're good for now." I guessed Jake would be hunting with me tonight because I could hear his stomach growl already.

I was instinctively going to take his hand but I hadn't even considered until my dad pointed out that Charlie couldn't know we were together, what the tribe knew.

My thoughts were interrupted by the loud entrance of another giant of a man. He moved so quickly that I was in the air before I could catch his face.

"Hi Seth," I said through laughs.

"Saw the truck and figured it must be a Cullen car. Where's Bella and Edward?"

"They weren't sure if it was a good idea to come here..."

Seth wasn't catching on and cocked his head. "Why not?"

"Well Seth, they are kind of still seventeen and eighteen years old."

"Oh, yeah." Seth shook his head and then took a good look at me. "And what are you now? Eighteen?"

"Sixteen," I winked.

"Robbin' the cradle, Bro?" He punched Jake's shoulder. I guess they did know.

I blushed and Jake pulled me by the waist closer to him. "Watch your mouth, Seth."

"Hey Seth?" I figured if I could get information out of anyone it would be him. "Jake won't tell me what impr -"

"Shoot, I gotta go!" He cut me off before I could finish my sentence. Perhaps they all still thought I was some little girl but I saw the look he gave Jake and Paul. "See you tonight!"

I took a step sideways out of Jake's arm, but he pulled me back. _What's wrong?_

I clenched my teeth. _Oh please, like you don't know. I'm not oblivious._

Ignorant to our silent conversation, Paul had started rambling again, this time over something Jared had done. Completely unamused, I went and sat on the floor next to little Billy.

"My tuck!" He held up a little toy pick up truck to me.

"I like it a lot."

"Here," he shoved a blue car at me and I began rolling it along the floor.

Billy chattered on making up a story about our cars and I just followed his every command. Sitting on the ground I was eye-level with the side table next to the couch and on it saw a framed picture of Jake and his father that was taken when Jake was very young. Billy couldn't be older than in his thirties when the picture was taken, and when I looked up at Jake I saw the incredible similarities between them that Grandpa Charlie had seen the other day.

"I'm going to go for a walk, Nay..." Jake was standing over us which was extremely intimidating.

"Okay."

"Do you want to come?"

"Are you going to tell me what you're hiding from me?"

"Renesmee..." That was a no.

"I'm fine here, thanks."

I turned my attention back to little Billy's world of fantasy, not even recognizing Jake's deep sigh and the front door open and close.

Only fifteen minutes had gone by when I began to feel horrible about my attitude towards Jake.

"I'm going to find Jake," I told Rachel and Paul.

Jared closed one eye and squinted the other one. "Not sure where he went, kid."

"Uh, that's okay I can kinda... follow him."

"Oh yeah, I guess you can." Insert awkward silence.

I left without saying anything else and picked up Jake's scent immediately. La Push was pretty unknown to me, and I could tell by the looks I was getting from the residents, I was or at least my family was unknown to them as well. I probably looked like a tennis ball in a pile of golf balls.

"Are you lost?" An older woman came up to me.

"No, just catching up to my friend."

She looked at me sideways. "And who is your friend?"

"Uh, Jacob Black?" Would she know Jake?

"Billy's boy? He's home? Please tell him to come by Helena's house while he's here?"

"Sure, no problem."

I kept walking once it was appropriate to break off my conversation with Helena, heading straight across La Push and up a hill. The ocean I could smell was stronger than ever now, and the crashing waves were much louder. When I reached the top I realized I was standing over First Beach.

Jake was standing still looking down at the ground. It took a few steps before I really realized where I was Quileute burial grounds.

"Jake?"

He lifted his head only a fraction of an inch, but said nothing.

I came up from behind and put my arm around him. At our feet was bronze plaque.

William "Billy Black"

1950-2011

_Death is not the extinguishing of a light, but the putting out of the lamp because the dawn has come._

Jake didn't say anything. I didn't say anything. We just stood there. Whatever Jake was thinking I left to the privacy of his own mind.

"Let's go hunt," he said out of no where.

"Should we go tell Rachel and Paul?"

"No." That's all I got out of him.

When we reached the woods I turned so he could undress. He hadn't shapeshifted since before we were together and it gave me butterflies in my stomach knowing he was naked behind me.

I felt a cold, wet, nose press against my arm. _Let's go. _

The small heard of elk we found was sufficient, but I got greedy when I came across the scent of mountain lion and strayed away from Jacob's line of sight.

I was running on such instinct the second another familiar yet odd scent hit me I stopped short and fell into a defensive crouch.

Five feet from me was a large blue-grey wolf. There were so many shapeshifters now, and the only ones I could recognize were Jake, Sam, Leah, and Seth this wolf was not any of them.

"It's okay," I put my hands up in peace. "I'm Renesmee. Renesmee Cullen."

The horse-sized beast growled at me, his eyes furious. My name meant nothing to him.

"I'm with Jacob Black. He's here. Just please wait."

I could fight the wolf, I knew that, but I wasn't sure how long I'd last. It all depended if this wolf was out for blood or just to incapacitate me. I could also run, but putting my back towards a possible attacker went against my latent instinct.

I considered all of this in a few seconds, but before I had to make a choice, my gigantic russet wolf was between us, snarling.

I couldn't understand why the other wolf hadn't backed down, but then of course I forgot if he was one of Sam's pack, they couldn't talk to each other.

In the distance I could hear a howl, the blue-grey stopped and look towards the sound. The hair on his back relaxed, and Jacob calmed, rubbing up against me.

_Get on my back, please._

I climbed his side and sat in between his shoulder blades.

_Is that Sam? _I asked.

_Yeah, he's on his way. The whole two pack thing makes it ridiculously difficult to communicate._

Minutes later the enormous black leader jumped through the greenery. He bowed his head to Jake, who bowed back. He looked at me, and nodded in recognition.

"I'm sorry if I caused any problems, Sam," I apologized.

_Sam says it isn't your fault. Tanner was out without permission and didn't recognize your hybrid scent. He associates the Cullens with vampires._

I remembered the young boy from years ago at the last bonfire in La Push after Billy's funeral. "I'm sorry Tanner," I turned to the blue-grey. I noticed now standing between Sam and Jake he was much smaller in size.

_Stop apologizing!_

Tanner snorted and motioned towards me.

_Tanner wants to know if you're the mind reader._

"My dad reads minds. I can show you what I can do, if you'd like?"

_He said okay._

I reached over and touched him showing him the bonfire, and in the background his human form. He backed away, a little uncertain.

"I kind of grow quickly," I explained. There was no response from any of them. "Hello?_"_

_Sorry, it takes a second to repeat everything. I had to explain that the two way telepathy only works with me._

"So let's go back and get rid of the middle man."

_Aren't you still hungry?_

_Later._

We ran back towards the town well I rode on Jake's back because he wouldn't let me any farther away from him Tanner always keeping one eye on us.

By the time Jake got his clothes and shifted back, almost the entire pack was outside of the Black residence.

There were a lot of hugs and handshakes between Jake and his brothers. Embry and Quil, after getting over the shock of seeing me as an adult, sandwiched me in between them in a big hug. When I finally squirmed away I ran to Jake who kissed me on the lips. All eyes were on us.

The awkwardness was getting old, but the welcoming committee soon dispersed to go ready for the bonfire, allowing us to get ready ourselves.

It was strange to sit around the fire that night in between Rachel and Jake. I was introduced to a dozen boys-turned-wolves that I had never met before, several of them asking to see my ability and an endless string of questions about vampires.

Jake could sense my discomfort and distracted them with the stories of Victoria and the newborn army. I took the chance to I walk over to Tanner to attempt a person-to-person conversation.

He wasn't quite as tall as Jake, but most of his features matched his brothers; dark hair, tanned skin. His eyes though were not a dark brown as Jake's and the others and I knew then where his blue-grey fur came from; his eyes matched perfectly.

"Hey Tanner, sorry about earlier." I sat down on the fallen log next to him.

He grinned wryly. "No, _I'm _sorry. I really am. I could have ruined everything for everyone. I could have broken one of the most detrimental laws if I had hurt you. I could have ."

"Hey Nay," Jake grabbed me a little too tightly by the arm and pulled me to my feet. "You want to go see what's cooking?"

I jerked away from him. "I was in the middle of a conversation, Jacob, that was rather rude." I looked down at Tanner who was avoiding Jake's eyes.

"It's all good," Tanner promised, now staring at the ground. "I just wanted to let you know I'm sorry and ."

"Great, see you later, Tanner," Jake interrupted him for the second time.

I was sure by the end of the night that Jake was purposely keeping me away from the younger boys. If he wasn't by my side either Quil, Embry, or Seth was, fending the others off.

I was aggravated to no end by the time the fire had died out and we walked back with Paul, Rachel, and a sleeping Billy.

_What's wrong? _Jake asked with his hand on the small of my back.

_You're keeping secrets and until you start explaining yourself... _I stepped away from his touch letting him know I was not interested in speaking to him in any way, shape, or form.

was in the bathroom changing when I heard him on the other side of the door. "I'm going to sleep on the couch. Just wanted to let you know..."

I didn't reply. If he wasn't keeping something from me he would have tried to prove his innocence. He was taking his punishment because I was right.

That night I ended up back in Alexandria, Ramses waiting for me as always. I had developed the oddest type of friendship with the man, something my dad was not pleased about.

"You look sad," he said as he meandered through the scrolls.

"My boyfriend is keeping secrets from me." I kicked up the sandy floor. I was so used to my non-dream, it came naturally to me now.

"The dog?"

"He is a _shapeshifter,_" I articulated. "Where did the whole guard dog part come from anyway?"

Ramses laughed to himself. "The problem with prophecies are that they have a tendency to be very unspecific. The prophet saw your wolves and that was how he interpreted it."

"So my mom isn't _really _a royal queen, right?"

"No, I do not believe that part was literal either."

I stood over the prophecy blank as it always was. Ramses said he couldn't make something so detailed using his power.

"Do you mind if I get some sleep tonight?" I asked. "I promise I'll let you know if anything changes."

Ramses nodded and I fell out of his world and back into the empty bed. I opened the door and saw Jake's long body trying to fit on the small couch. I walked out there and stood over him.

He opened his eyes and I gave him my hand. He followed me back into the room without question and I went back to sleep for real, this time wrapped in his arms.

I woke up alone in bed, but could hear Jake in the kitchen with his sister.

"Everyone is pitching in a little, not sure what Kim and Emily are bringing," she replied to a question I hadn't heard.

I showered and dressed, emerging to a bustling house. Kim, Jared's wife, was helping to organize massive amounts of food. I saw out the window the men were carrying full-sized picnic tables like they were feathers.

"Hi, Nessie!" Kim hugged me. I had never actually had a conversation with her before, but she seemed very sweet.

Jake, Paul, and Jared came back to help us carry the food outside. Jake and I still hadn't spoken.

We were blessed by a clear and sunny day; a treat for the Olympic peninsula. The men had pulled the picnic tables together finding room for eleven adults and four children. I tried to think of Jacob and his friends being boys as my mom described them, but I just couldn't picture a scrawny little Seth Clearwater. Seth now sat next to a very pretty dark haired girl, Laura was her name, and he was looking at her as though she was the reincarnation of Venus herself.

"What's up with Seth?" I whispered to Jake, the first thing I had said to him all day. "Does it have something to do with that imprinting thing you won't tell me?"

He got a solemn look on his face for a moment but leaned over and kissed me. "I told you I will tell you about it, but let's enjoy the company of our friends for now." I didn't like his tone but when he took my hand in his it sent goosebumps up and down my body and I forgot what I was even annoyed about.

There was enough food to feed an army but with original seven boys of the Quileute pack there, it was easily polished off. I tried to make small talk with the five women but they all seemed... paranoid.

Rachel introduced me to Embry's girlfriend, Crystal, who seemed almost frightened of me. I thought I fit in pretty well as a human, but her expression said otherwise.

"Hey, why aren't you eating your food?" It was Sam and Emily's son Kaleb pointing to the missing plate in front of me. "You have to eat!"

I had been so upset after the bonfire that I hadn't gone to hunt and when I was this thirsty, human food tasted horrible to me.

"Kaleb, shush," Emily chided. "I'm sorry Renesmee, that was inappropriate, it's just not something we can talk about with them."

"No apology necessary," I promised and managed to eat a few bites of chicken. I smiled looking still at Emily as she smoothed out her son's hair. Maybe I had been around Rosalie for too long, but I wondered why Emily didn't get the scars that marred her face fixed. They did wonderful things with plastic surgery now. Maybe when you have someone like Sam that loves you so unconditionally, it doesn't matter. I wondered if I looked like that if Jake...

I shook the idea out of my head. We had just scraped the surface of our feelings for each other. I was going to become one of those air-headed girls doodling his name all over my notebook if I kept this up.

The rest of the day passed by all too quickly. I lost count of the stories they told, the antics they had gotten into when they were younger. The entire time Jake held my hand so tightly it was as though he thought I'd float away if he released me. Everyone once in a while he'd insert his own witty comments, whispering them in my ear just so I'd lean closer and he could kiss me. I felt my face go flush when he held one kiss for longer than the others and all eyes were on us. I would have bet my bike that they were all thinking the exact same thing because their facial expressions were identical, but what, I wasn't sure.

While we were cleaning up I realized Jacob was no where in sight. I wandered around the house and finally found him in his old garage, the one he used to hang out in with my mom during their "rebellious" days. He stood in the far corner, speaking into his phone in whispers.

My sensitive hearing only picked up from the other side of the line, "I agree," before Jake eyed me and flipped the phone closed. It was my dad on the other line.

"What was that about? Was that my dad?"

"Yup, just asking if your mom should get dragged out here against her will or not. I think she should and your dad agrees."

It was the most ridiculous lie I had ever heard and I was now even more frustrated than earlier.

"Jacob Black, tell me what's going on! It feels like everyone is walking around on pins and needles! It makes me feel like a leper!"

Within a few strides of his very long legs he was standing next to me, his hands around my waist "You are the farthest thing from a leper. Maybe they're jealous?"

"Not likely," I was trying my best to keep on an angry face.

"You are so beautiful, Renesmee, did you know that?" His face was leaning down and next to mine, his extra warm breath tickled my neck and sent electricity through my body.

"You sound like my dad when he talks to my mom," I was losing control of the anger.

"Let's not bring your parents into this, please."

"Well if " I had no idea what my objection was going to be because when Jacob's lips met mine I lost all sense of time and space.

"Uncle Jake, Uncle Jake!" Kaleb, along with Jared's boy, Tommy, and little Billy all ran into the garage, our moment dissolving into nothing. "You ride motorcycles right? Can you ask Dad to lemme have a motorcycle?"

Jake looked more disappointed than I did, but he put on a smile for the kids. "Maybe when you're this big," he raised his hand a good 6 feet in the air.

"Aw man!" He was about to object again but Tommy threw something at him and they ran out as quickly as they ran in.

"Where were we," Jake backed me up against the work table and leaned down to kiss me again but he met my hand instead which I placed in between our faces. "Hey, what's that for?"

"You're not telling me something."

"Walk on the beach with me?" he asked. I nodded because for some reason I couldn't say no.

We had taken our shoes off and rolled up our pants to walk in the tide. We walked silently for a while, watching one of the few sunsets First Beach sees a year. I was too memorized by the brilliant shades of orange and yellow to notice Jake who snuck around me, pulling me down besides him in the sand. It was getting windy and I could see the beginning of the grey clouds that would soon once again grace the skies of La Push.

"Do you know the poem... the one about footprints?" He pointed at the footprints we had left in the sand; some held firmly, others were being gently washed away by the surf.

"Are you serious?"

"Humor me?" he asked earnestly.

"The one that says something like some people leave footprints on our hearts and we are never the same?" I was paraphrasing trying to play along with the game I was obviously in the middle of.

"Yup, that's the one."

He was silent again, poking at the sand beneath us. I couldn't imagine what was so difficult for him to say and it was killing me inside.

"You asked about imprinting," he said after what seemed like an hour even though the sun still hadn't set. "Think about it like.... footprints. Specific footprints. Like, if there was just one person in the world whose footprints couldn't get washed away," he gestured to the direction we had come from, all traces of our path were now back to smooth sand. "That's imprinting."

"I'm still confused. You mean like love?"

"True love. It goes beyond all reason and rationale. It's what happens to... us."

There it was, the kicker. Us. The Quileute boys, the Quileute werewolves.

"We can't help it. We see her and that's it, she's the one for us... forever."

I was trying to wrap my head around a small part that made sense to me. "So Seth imprinted on that girl, that means he got no choice? Does she have a choice?"

"It's beyond any type of choice, Nay. She is Seth's true love, he didn't need to figure it out in the human sense. They are meant to be together. He will never want anyone else and she has no reason to. It is an unexplainable pull of the heart."

I was steering my mind away from where I was terrified it would go, probing carefully for more safe answers. "Paul and Rachel? Sam and Emily? Jared and Kim? Embry and Crystal?"

"Yup."

"Paul said... everyone, but what about Quil?" I again avoided the question I was burning to know.

"Imprinting can happen at any age. It's about companionship, friendship and eventually love, but it's so much more than that."

"Jacob, what about Quil?"

"Claire, Emily's niece," he looked down at his hands.

"What!? She's what? Twelve?" I was on my feet now, my skin felt like it was searing off of my body.

"It actually happened when she was two," Jake's eyes wouldn't move from his hands.

I had to ask it. I wasn't ready for my world to fall to pieces but I had to know. I prepared myself before speaking. I prepared myself for an answer that would end up killing me. I wanted to remember everything about us that had happened before it came crashing down around me. I had no idea what heartbreak was, but I was sure I was about to find out.

"So if everyone has, then what about you? What am I to you then? Who is this girl? Are you just going to up and leave me?" Flashes of hot and cold were pulsing through my body as if the beats of my heart alternated my vampire half and human half.

Now Jake was standing too, his eyes held an urgency I'd never seen before. "Renesmee, are you kidding me? Stop for a second and think! God, please think!"

_Since Claire was two._

_Any age._

_Magnetic pull._

_Best friends. _

_Destiny._

_Fate._

He reached out but I jumped away. "No," I shook my head so hard I thought I would pass out, tears running uncontrollably down my face. I had to choke through my hysteria in order to speak. "Are you saying you didn't have a choice? You've been... stuck with me since . No. No, Jake what are you talking about? This is ridiculous. This isn't real."

"Renesmee do you not get it? Do you not understand?" Jacob's cries were of both love and pain. "I exist because of you. You are my everything. You envy the love your parents have but here I am! I am that love!"

He reached out to me again and I couldn't will myself to move away this time. His hands found my face and he brushed the tears off of my red puffy cheeks with his thumb. I looked up at his dark eyes and fell in love with him right then and there. Or had I already fallen? Had I even needed to fall in the first place?

"Renesmee Cullen, you have been my whole world since the day you were born. When I told you it was destiny that we were friends, I meant more than that, I just couldn't tell you until you were ready. You are my soul mate. I, Jacob Black, am in love with you. I always have been, and you have always known it."

The curtains of anger and confusion closed with his words. I was lost in his gaze as tears welled up in his eyes and fell down his cheeks. I reached up and wiped one away.

"I love you," I whispered, because there was nothing else left to say.

**Edward**

_"I wasn't even thinking about it when we decided to make the trip up here, Edward. I don't know what to do."_ I could hear the panic in Jake's voice over the phone. Bella followed me upstairs away from Charlie and Sue's hearing range.

"Does she know?" Bella asked into the phone, sitting next to me.

_"No, but she's extremely upset. No one meant to put us in this position, Paul wasn't thinking and "_

"It's no ones fault, Jake." I tried to calm him down but I was just as panicked, I just didn't let it show.

_"I'm... I'm just going to have to tell her. I am."_

"Wait until you get back here so you have support."

_"No."_ Jake sounded fierce...fiercely afraid. _"This is something I've always known I'd have to do. I'll do it. I have to do this on my own."_

"I agree " I began, but the line went dead.

We had no phone calls from either Jacob or Renesmee the rest of the day which was either an extremely good sign or an extremely bad one.

Bella had already show signs of a nervous breakdown yesterday after seeing the clearing, and not knowing exactly how this would all turn out was taking even more of a told on her psyche.

I managed subtle hints to Sue that she and Charlie needed to go into town this evening before Renesmee and Jake got home, and she picked up on it quickly.

"Charlie," she walked casually into the living room handing him a glass of lemonade. "I was thinking while we're in town we could go to the winery that Deputy Thomas' wife was telling us about last week."

Wine was not something one would normally pair up with the rugged man, but he scratched his chin and give a slight nod. "Sure. Kids, what do you think?"

"We don't drink." Before Bella was even finished with the sentence Charlie straightened up in his chair.

"Alcohol," I quickly added. "Thank you for the offer though, Charlie."

I saw the police chief relax a little bit, but being that his automatic reaction to Bella's answer was one of nerves and not curiosity gave away the inner workings of his mind. I was certain that Charlie Swan knew we didn't drink or eat.

Sue and Charlie were almost out the door when I heard Bella's cell phone chirp from upstairs; a text message from our daughter.

WE'LL BE HOME IN THIRTY. I NEED ANSWERS.

"She's going to hate us," Bella sigh into my chest.

I kissed the top of her head and ran my fingers through her hair. "Renesmee is very rational, she'll understand."

I hope.

Bella told me how sometimes her mind talked her indestructible body into believing either her head hurt, or her stomach was actually upset. I didn't truly believe her until the sound of the SUV's engine met my ears. I honestly thought I was going to be sick.

I was standing in the living room, but Bella was glued to the window.

"They're holding hands!" She was glowing, a smile finally on her face.

Jake opened the screen door allowing Renesmee to walk through first, then wrapped his arm around her waist and nudged her towards us.

_I told her I didn't want to talk about the details until we were with you._

"I'm guessing Grandpa and Sue aren't here?" Renesmee sat down on the couch signally the rest of us to do the same.

"They're out for the night," I said quietly. The tone of my own voice took me by surprise; I was nervous around my own daughter.

Renesmee licked her lips. "How long have you known?"

Bella leaned forward, but Renesmee leaned away. Before anyone answered her question she asked another one.

"That's why Jake was on the phone with you right? To let you know that he was going to tell me? To get your permission?"

Bella and Jake had odd expressions on their faces; part relief that the big bad secret was out, but also a hint of dread. I'm sure mine was the same.

"Truth time?" Bella looked between the three of us.

Renesmee huffed in response. _As if I wanted anything else._

"Since the day you were born. Well, three days for me. I was... you know."

"What did you do?"

I had been silent but broke out into laughter pulling Bella to me. "She attacked him," I said after composing myself a bit. "Well, Seth jumped in the way, but she tried. I believe her words were _'you stupid mutt.'_"

There was no blush to her face but I could tell she was embarrassed. "I was a newborn and that was the only time I lost control. Thank you very much!" She threw me a dark look, but a bit of humor played on her lips.

"And you were okay with it?"

Bella looked at me for the answer. "It took a while..." Jake and Bella looked at me amusingly. "Okay, okay, it took me until about a year ago."

"You let him stay around for this long?"

"Renesmee," Bella sat down next to her. "We knew how imprinting worked. It was difficult, but it wasn't something Jacob could control. I felt it the feeling you have when you were inside of me. You were pulled to each other even before you were born."

"It was utterly impossible to keep you a part when he made you so happy, even as a child." I added.

"So so you've _always _known?"

"Yes," Bella and I said simultaneously.

"_Everyone _has always known?" I saw the images of our family and the pack go through her mind.

"Yes."

"Well, it explains a lot," she said calmly. A part of me shocked at how mature she was being, but I was the one that told Bella she would look at it rationally.

"Does it?" Jake spoke for the first time.

"Why you moved with us, why most of the Quileutes acted so tense around me, why a twenty-something year old guy had a little kid as a best friend." She looked up and winked at him, then down at her lap. "If I have questions later can I... ask?"

"Of course you can," Jake sat on her other side. "I _want _you to know everything."

As soon as the word left Jake's lips a dense cloud of tension fell on us. There was one exception to that _everything. _The one piece of _everything _that may be just a little to much for her to take. The piece of _everything _that made Renesmee Jake's second love_. _

"Alright," she nodded. "When are Sue and Grandpa getting back?"

"Uhh," Bella looked perplexed, "that's it? No other questions? No yelling or crying?"

Renesmee furrowed her eyebrows. "Why would I yell or cry?"

"We kept a secret from you!" Bella was outraged at the lack of drama. "A big huge supernatural secret!"

Pushing her hair behind her ears, my daughter thought hard for a second. "I guess it just makes sense? The whole magnetic connection part and it really _isn't_ something you can just blurt out and tell a kid... or whatever I was. So yeah... I get why I couldn't know before." She shrugged.

And that's how the conversation ended. Jake and Renesmee went to get their bags out of the truck and I sat next to my very stunned wife.

"She's just like you," I laughed.

Bella's forehead wrinkled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Your reactions have always surprised me from the very first day I met you."

She went to open her mouth but I kissed her before she could come back with any sort of reply.

From outside I could here Renesmee and Jake talking by the car.

"I'm glad I know everything now," she said to him.

_No, my dear daughter, _I thought to myself. _You know almost everything._

And I prayed that she would never need to find that out.

**A/N: So one of the big bad secrets is out and much like her mother, Renesmee took it much better than anyone else expected her to.**

**There is going to be a bit of a lapse between this chapter and the next. I need to do some serious plot work and it may be necessary for change the plot around meaning changing the chapters... so I won't be able to write chapter by chapter for a bit. If you haven't already put me on author alert do that; I may post an outtake in the mean time! Thank you for reading!**


	17. Clarity: Bella & Renesmee

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

**A/N: **Yeah I lied about how long until my next chapter  this wrote itself. It's kind of scary when that happens. Not nearly as long as some of the earlier chapters... I can tell it's getting more difficult to write from two POVs much since Nessie, Edward, and Bella will be together for pretty much the rest of the story, but we'll see.

I'm still up for out takes... if there's anything anyone wants to see (before, during, or between LAF or TPC) feel free to give me suggestions.

**Chapter 10 - Clarity**

**Renesmee**

The last five days in Port Angeles were even more difficult now that I knew the truth; Jacob was the true love of my life. The feelings I had, especially the pain I always felt when we were apart, all meant something.

"You okay kid?" Grandpa Charlie nudged me from my thoughts. I realized I had been staring rather intensely at Jake, who unfortunately sat on the other couch.

"Hmmm?" It was almost painful to pull my eyes away from Jake and look up. "Oh yeah, just daydreaming I guess."

"I'm really going to miss you guys. Promise it won't be such a long gap next time between visits?" He was speaking to my parents now.

"Sure Dad, we'll do our best. It's tough with school and everything." My mom was nodding, but that's not what she was thinking, and I knew that because it wasn't what any of us were thinking.

I was thinking that we wouldn't know when we'd go to Alexandria. We wouldn't know when the Volturi would finally make their decision. We wouldn't know after we faced them who would be alive.

There was one way we would know more, and that's why I decided if the rest of my family wouldn't help me, I would go alone. Thank goodness my mom kept her shield around me lately to spare my dad from all the gooey teenage love; no one would know until I knew how I was going to pull it off -- that's when Alice would see it.

The next few days were sunny and bright out, forcing my parents to stay inside. My mom feigned illness and my dad, the ever caring husband, said he wanted to stay with her. So Jake and I were in charge of doing all things "normal" with Sue and Charlie. It's not that I wasn't happy to be around him and Sue, but the pretenses were just becoming tiring.

"Renesmee, think of it this way," my mom cornered me before we left for the pier to take my dad's boat (which my parents bought for him) out into the sound. "We don't know what's going to happen. We need to give him this now."

Surprisingly, regardless of my eagerness to get back to Astoria, when we said goodbye I cried in Grandpa Charlie's arms.

"I'm going to miss you," I whimpered into his trademark plaid shirt.

"Next chance I get I'll make my way out to Astoria." He pulled me back so he could look at me. "How does that sound?"

I nodded, moving on to say goodbye to Sue, my mom now sobbing tearlessly as her father held her head between his hands.

"I think about you everyday, Bells. You take care of yourself, alright?" He kissed her forehead.

The ride home was silent. The goodbyes we had given were more emotionally draining than we had thought they would be, and little did we know how significant they would be until we pulled up to the house hours later.

I could hear Emmett and Rosalie inside when we pulled up, along with several other frantic conversations I couldn't separate in my head. I looked over at my dad. If he knew what was going on, he didn't let it show.

I took in the entire scene the second I walked through the door: Jasper had his arms around a very frazzled Alice, Esme was cleaning -- something she does when she's upset, Carlisle was pacing, Emmett and Rosalie were stone faced against the far wall of the living room.

"What happen?" my mom asked, her voice ringing of apprehension.

Jake moved over to me and held onto me tightly. "You all look like you've seen a ghost. What's going on?"

I stared at Alice hard and she stared right back. No, it was no ghost.

"You saw it, didn't you?" I asked, my eyes still fixated on my aunt.

Alice chewed on her bottom lip before opening her mouth, but no words came out.

"Saw what?" Jake asked, exasperated.

"The prophecy," my dad replied calmly.

Our meeting room, known in most households as a dining room, was filled to the brim with worry topped off with a bit of fear. I still didn't even know what Alice had see.

"I saw the room, the one with the old books and scrolls. You were there, Nessie. There were others -- I _think _Bella and Edward -- but I can't be sure."

"Why would she be there?" My mom's words were halted. "We would never let her go there."

I shook my head at her, accidentally allowing a single laugh to escape making everyone turn to me. "Don't you get it? I _have_ to be there."

Everyone pondered that for a moment, and in the end, no one disagreed with me, allowing Alice to continue.

"You were reading the prophecy. I saw Amun for a split second. Everything got hazy after that."

"But why now?" Rosalie spoke up. "After all of these months, why did you suddenly see this?"

Alice looked over at me. "Do you want to tell them, or should I?"

I scrunched my nose up, disappointed I couldn't seem to keep any secrets around my family. "I might have decided to go there alone, since none of you were making any progress."

I cringed when I heard Esme gasp, and winced seeing the glare my dad was giving me -- daggers could have probably shot out of his eyes.

"When she decided she was going to go whether or not we agreed, I saw her there as a definite," Alice explained. "Once we decide who else will go, then it'll be more clear."

"Go where?" Jake narrowed his eyes.

I smiled at him matter-of-factly. "Alexandria, of course."

***

"This _cannot _be happening!" My dad had lost the composure he had held onto and was huffing and puffing in Carlisle's study early the next morning. I was downstairs, but could still hear everything.

"I thought you believed in the prophecy?" Carlisle challenged him.

I could only guess my dad's facial expression, but I would choose defeat if I had to pick one. "Maybe I didn't believe it as much as I thought I did..."

"It doesn't really matter what you do or do not believe, son. There is only the reality of what's in front of us. We have decisions to make."

"I'm going. If my daughter is going then I'm going as well."

"So am I." My mom was still walking up the stairs when she spoke. I quickly followed her.

Alice skipped down the hallway meeting me at the door to the study. "It's so much more clear now. I'm much less anxious when things are clear."

"So we'll go," I joined the conversation. "Next week?"

"The sooner the better," Carlisle agreed.

My dad scowled at us. "I don't see why we need to go right now."

"_Because_," I pointed out, "we need to know as much as possible before we find out anything about the Volturi's plan, and who knows when Alice will see something about them."

"She's right Edward," my mom said quietly. "It needs to be soon."

The conversation turned into travel plans and I left as soon as I heard Jake pull up on his bike.

"Please get me out of this house," I begged before he pulled me to him, greeting me with a long drawn out kiss.

My parents were standing on the balcony, my dad clearing his throat -- his usual response for any public displays of affection. "Where are you going?"

"Not sure," I shrugged. "I'd just like to be normal for an hour or two if that's alright?" I didn't mean to sound so bitter, but it was too late. Both of my parents looked like they had just been stung; normalcy was one thing they wanted so badly for me, and it was the one thing that they couldn't give me.

Jake and I took turns leading the way on our bikes, neither of us talking about where we wanted to go. When a direction called to me I turned, when Jake wanted to get on a beaten gravel path, I followed.

I saw signs for Tongue Point, a peninsula that stuck right out in the middle of the Columbia River, and followed the arrows until the road ended in a dense forest of trees.

"Well, this was random," Jake said pulling his helmet off.

I put the kickstand of my bike up, my helmet falling from my hand to the ground. I didn't care. "I just needed this. I needed you to myself."

I heard my phone in my pocket chime, but didn't bother to answer it, walking towards the river that was only a few yards from the road.

The clouds were rolling in making visibility impossible passed a quarter mile, but I pretended I could actually see the state of Washington from where we stood. Without even thinking I pointed at it.

"What are you doing?"

"Washington is that way," I told him.

"Yes..." he lingered on his word, urging me to continue.

I sighed and took his hand. "It's just... well, it's somewhere we could be in our future. I want to stand there on the other side one day and look back over here. I want this to be the past."

"We have to live in the present first," Jake reminded me. "Let's just worry about that." He stopped and looked up; the rain clouds had rushed in from the west, much more quickly than either of us would have expected. "Nay, we really need to go or else we're going to get caught in this storm."

#

Not even a few minutes on the road had passed before the skies opened over us, pelting us with huge rain drops. We slowed our speed, regardless of how badly we wanted to get out of the rain; the last thing we wanted was to crash our precious bikes. We may be practically invincible, but they weren't.

Even though the rain had let up, we were drenched by the time we walked our bikes into the garage. I heard nothing from the house and then I remembered the text message I hadn't read before.

_YOU LEFT BEFORE ALICE COULD MENTION THE RAIN. WE ARE GOING HUNTING. HOPE YOU DIDN'T GET TOO WET!_

I'm sure my mom was laughing when she sent it. I showed it to Jake and he grinned deviously.

"What's with the smile?" I asked as he moved my wet hair away from my face -- even the helmet had been useless against the rain, although that probably had more to do with my refusal to put the visor down rather than a defect in the equipment.

"They're all hunting," he whispered, kissing my neck.

I swallowed hard. "Yes they are--." I didn't get to finish because Jake had picked me up so my leg were wrapped around him, and was kissing me intensely. I felt the difference in his kisses the moment his lips met mine. Urgent. Needy. He carried me all the way to the house and into my room -- how he didn't run into anything I didn't know, because his eyes never left me for a second.

His hands began to wander, something they never had done before. I felt them gently pulling on my wet clothes, like he was trying to hold back from tearing them off my body. His hot hands, only warm on my skin, moved underneath my shirt instead, stopping at the small of my back. His fingers played carefully with the waist of my jeans, not sure how much farther he could go. We had somehow kissed our way closer to the bed and he laid me down, never letting our lips part. My heart was racing as frantically, as his was, and our labored breathing was a consistent rhythm.

"Jake..." It was almost impossible for me to think straight the way his body was laying on mine, pressing us together so I could feel every inch of him. I tried to gather my thoughts but he was kissing my ear, my throat, my chest... "Jake, wait!"

"Is this too much?" Most men would be frustrated, sexually frustrated that is, to be stopped like that. Not Jacob. His face only showed concern for me, his hand left the rim of my jeans and reached up to my cheek.

No, it wasn't too much. It was never going to be too much. "I want this, I do. I just... well, my mom told me about her first time..."

He tried not to change his facial expression but I could see the hint of disappointment on his face. "They were married."

"I'm not asking for that. I'm just... I don't know. They waited, Jake. Waited for years. It's just... well, is it too fast?"

He sat me up and kissed my forehead. "It doesn't matter what I think, Nay. It's what you want."

"Damn you and your imprinting! Stop giving me whatever I want! I want to know what you want!"

He tried to stop a smile, but it still managed to tickle the corner of his mouth. He ignored my demands. "I have to say, you and Edward with all your virtue. It's impressive alright."

"My dad?"

He chuckled and pulled me onto the bed, holding me and breathing in the scent of my hair, our equally drench bodies weaving into each other. "From what I understand, Bella was quite the little minx. Your dad was the one who insisted on waiting."

I had never known that before. I knew they waited, but I was never told it was a one-sided decision. "You don't mind waiting?"

He turned me so I faced him and kissed me gently several times over. I thought he either didn't hear me or was ignoring the question, so I pulled back. "Jake?"

"You're silly. 'Course I don't mind waiting. But if that's the case, I'd really like to practice kissing you... if that's alright?"

My giggles were smothered by his lips as he parted my own and carefully took them in his mouth. He was putting on a good show, but I still felt the tension in his body -- all of his body. I wanted to give him a chance to calm down so I nuzzled my head in the crook of his neck, taking in his deep woodsy scent.

"Can we get you into a change of dry clothes, please?" He whispered but I was already half asleep and could barely agree. I hadn't realized how mentally exhausted I was from all that had been happening, and then there were the continued conversations with Ramses, which never let me completely sleep at night either.

Months ago Jake would have left the room or called for someone in the house to help me change, but I heard him go to my dresser and pull out clothes. He laughed when I weakly put my hands over my head, trying to help him take my shirt off. I tried to will myself conscious again, knowing I must be a horrible tease.

"I'll do it," I said barely coherent. There was no way he was taking off my underwear. "Turn around please."

He did like the gentleman he is and I squirmed out of my wet clothes and into soft, warm, pajamas. I was at the wrong end of the bed but I laid my head down there anyway.

"I'll be right back," he said, now seeming very far off. I hadn't even heard him come back in, he was just suddenly picking me up so he could put me right side up in my bed. As always, he climbed in next to me.

"I love you," he kissed me, but my eyes wouldn't have been able to open for God himself I was so far gone. "I can wait for you forever. We have forever, Renesmee."

Somewhere in my half-conscious mind I realized that we did have forever. He would never leave me... except he wasn't immortal. He could age if he wanted to, but he was stuck with me. I wanted to ask him about that, yet there was no way I could do it now. Not when I could already begin to see the stars of my dreams.

The stars against the blackness were slowly morphing into a dark grey sky. I recognized La Push immediately and could see Jake there with me. He was speaking, but it was like he was on mute. I picked up random words and phrases.

"...because I recently decided that I'm not giving up... Now you're just going to have to deal with the consequences of that choice -- me... All the more reason to fight -- fight harder now, while I can."

The impenetrable pull that normally existed between us wasn't there, but I could still feel the love. Then he pulled me to him in a forceful kiss. It was as if my body and mind were separate entities because regardless of how much I urned for his kiss, my body responded in protest. It was pulling away from him and finally just shut down. He finally stopped kissing but and had a stupid grin on his face. My feelings were those of pure anger. I was angry that Jake kissed me.

It may have been through my eyes but I felt like a spectator as I wound up and sent a right hook straight to Jake's jaw. The pain radiated from my hand while Jake was unharmed.

A frenzy of words began to flow between us and again the sound was broken like a bad radio.

"...I hate you Jacob Black."

"That's good," Dream-Jacob replied. "Hate is a passionate emotion."

We were in his car -- a car I barely recognized -- and I was furious. Looking into the reflection of the side view mirror I did not see myself, but my mother instead...

I fell out of the horrible dream, but not back to my bed and reality. I was in Egypt -- I could pick up the scent of sand and clay immediately -- but it was night. Ramses was standing next to me, looking up at the moon, saying nothing.

"This is different," I finally said.

He chuckled, walking down the street without replying. I followed although his lack of explanation was beginning to wear on me.

"I won't tell you what I know," I blurted out.

This got his attention, but only minimally. "We have time for that later, this is important."

We walked farther from the scenery that I was use to and the buildings got almost blurry. "Ramses, what's going on?"

"I can only create what I know. I'm not familiar with this area of Alexandria."

"Familiar? But isn't that where you live?"

"No."

I stopped in my tracks, but he ignored me and kept walking. I noticed then that there were no people, no noises, there weren't even any lights from the undefined buildings.

"So you're going to have me drag my family to Alexandria and you won't even be there to help us?"

"I am helping you now child," he said, already a few yards ahead of me. "Please hurry."

I caught up with him and didn't ask anymore questions.

Eventually I saw where he was heading; a massive castle that seemed to be sitting in the middle of the harbor we were looking out over.

"Wow."

"Renesmee," he finally looked directly at me, "it is of dire importance you remember how we got here."

"You aren't making _any _sense!"

"The Alexandria you have been seeing is how _I _remember it. I have not been back in a century. It is too dangerous."

"Dangerous? Why?"

He once again ignored me and continued. "This is the Qaitbay Citadel. It is a landmark and still stands. I do not know what is built on top of the library but you must find a way to get to it. Your best chance of finding it is using structures that still exist. It's the best you can do."

"The best _I _can do? This is what _you're _here for! _You _need to do better."

"I am not the only one that is here for the reason of the prophecy. You are the prophet's child. This is why _you're _here."

He turned around spouting out directions and distances: walk a half mile and take a left, walk five yards and take a right. He pointed out things that may still be there that I could use as better reference points. My mind easily filed them away; I always had perfect recall.

We reached the familiar building that I had been in dozens of times by now.

"Do you know about Alice's vision?" I realized it was too coincidental that Alice has her vision only a day before Ramses gave me more information about my quest.

"We will continue to practice this path until you arrive."

"So I really won't get to meet you?"

I thought I saw him smirk, but he reached his arm out and I left his world and returned to my own.

"Nay, you okay?" Jake was propped up on one elbow, looking down at me. "You were talking an awful lot."

I couldn't tell him about my actual dream; how I felt about him kissing me, how I punched him. That would break his heart. "Ramses was just giving some more details about our trip, that's all."

The dream was bothering me, but Ramses had given me a lot to digest; I was just as involved as he was. This prophecy was as much my destiny as it was his. He was here to contact me, I was here to tell my family. The past, present, and future became very clear to me then, but it only took a few more minutes of Jake crooning soft words to me before I fell back into a dreamless sleep.

The hunting party didn't come back until dawn the next morning. Alice and my mom both had devilish smiles on their faces each time they caught my eye. I was sure Alice had seen what almost went on between me and Jake the night before, and I was also sure my dad had no idea, or else Aro himself wouldn't be able to hold him back from attacking Jake.

Jake had gone to his apartment for the first time in a few days; I didn't understand why he didn't just move in, but I was too nervous to ask. He came back that afternoon just as Esme called me to the kitchen.

"Here you go," she handed me a big wicker basket.

"What's this?" I lifted the top and saw an abundance of food.

Jake kissed my forehead and grabbed the keys to my mom's camaro off the long rack that hung on the wall. "A picnic of course."

Our picnic had been rather perfect, and I desperately needed it after the disturbing feelings I had dealt with in my dream. After we were done eating Jake laid down on the blanket, motioning for me to come to him. He held me there for a long time in silence, both of us basking in the warm sun that was actually gracing us with its presence, but oddest question had been swirling around in my mind since I had woken up.

"Jake, you were sixteen when I was born?"

"Around that, yeah, why?" He turned my body in his arms so I was laying on his shoulder looking up at him.

"I was just wondering if you ever had a girlfriend or anything... before me."

Jake thought long and hard. I didn't want him to edit, but I also didn't want to make accusations that he was going to. It wasn't that I needed to know the extent of his love life, it didn't matter all that much now that we were together, but curiosity got the best of me.

"There was one girl, but it just wasn't right."

"Did you love her?"

"Like I said, it wasn't right. I thought I loved her, but it was the wrong kind of love. I didn't really understand that though, not until you were born."

"So you loved her and then left her when I was born?"

I could tell he was getting more nervous as the conversation continued. "No, things were over by then, and would you believe it if I told you that everyone ended up living happily ever after?"

I snuggled in closer to him, trying to fully absorb the meaning of his words. "So she found love too?"

"She did," he whispered. Before I could pester him with any more questions he rolled on top of me and kissed me hard. "I love you."

"I love you," I replied between breaths. That girl didn't matter anymore, and it was a question I should never even asked in the first place.

* * *

**Bella**

I couldn't take my eyes off of my dad as Edward pulled the truck out of the driveway. It took everything I had not to have a complete breakdown when I said goodbye. I wanted to say a _real _goodbye. I wanted to tell him how much he meant to me and that he was the best father in the world. Maybe I would have to write another letter. Who would I give it to this time? Would I leave it in the house for the police to find when the entire Cullen family suddenly goes missing? Do I go to J Jenks and tell him to only send out the letters if he doesn't hear from me?

I knew Edward was looking at me out of the corner of his eye, frustrated that he didn't know the thoughts behind my blatant worry. I took his hand without saying anything and squeezed it.

A sixth sense told me when arrived home that something else was wrong, and from the looks of my family waiting for us, I knew I was right.

"What happen?"

Jake's voice was shaky and he instinctively went to Renesmee's side. "You all look like you've seen a ghost. What's going on?"

"You saw it, didn't you?" Renesmee asked confidently, staring at Alice.

"Saw what?" Jake pushed.

I felt Edward behind me, his hand gently reaching for me. I heard him take a deep breath, the kind he takes before he states a fact. A simple fact. "The prophecy."

We all moved into the dining room as Alice rambled off her vision, her nerves definitely on edge. "I saw the room, the one with the old books and scrolls. You were there, Nessie. There were others -- I _think _Bella and Edward -- but I can't be sure."

My daughter? In Egypt? "Why would she be there? We would never let her go there."

An inappropriate laugh came from Renesmee's direction. "Don't you get it? I _have_ to be there."

No one had a rebuttal for that and Alice had no problem filling the pause. "You were reading the prophecy. Then I saw Amun for a split second. Everything got hazy after that."

Rosalie shook her head and got out of her seat. "But why now? After all of these months, why did you suddenly see this?"

I could tell by how Alice was looking at Nessie we had all missed something. "Do you want to tell them, or should I?"

Renesmee looked annoyed. "I might have decided to go there alone, since none of you were making any progress."

Alice quickly nodded her head. "When she decided she was going to go whether or not we agreed, I saw her there as a definite. Once we decide who else will go, then it'll be more clear."

We had lost Jake somewhere in the conversation. "Go where?"

My daughter had an expression of pure delight on her face. "Alexandria, of course."

I was downstairs the next morning and could hear Edward rant to Carlisle over the vision. As soon as I heard him volunteer himself for the trip, I was certain of my course.

"So am I," I said walking up the stairs, Renesmee at my heels. Alice said something to her, but I was concentrating so hard on the thoughts racing through my head, I didn't hear her.

"So we'll go. Next week," Renesmee decided.

Carlisle agreed but Edward was not so receptive. "I don't see why we need to go right now."

"Because we need to know as much as possible before we find out anything about the Volturi's plan, and who knows when Alice will see something about them." My daughter was right, as she so often was.

"She's right Edward. It needs to be soon." I reached out to him but he remained stiff.

Renesmee quickly left the room hearing Jake pull up to the house. I followed Carlisle to his computer where he was pulling up flights to Egypt, but heard Nessie's request to Jake and followed Edward to the balcony. We walked out just as they ended a kiss.

"Where are you going?" Edward interrupted their moment.

"Not sure. I'd just like to be normal for an hour or two if that's alright?"

I could tell she immediately felt badly for using the dreaded "N" word, but it was too late and I felt the pain in my chest. Maybe one day.

Renesmee and Jake hadn't been gone very long before Alice skipped into the room. "They should have asked me what the weather was going to be today."

"Rain?" Edward laughed.

"Yup!" she giggled. "I want to go hunting, anyone else up for it?"

I agreed, meaning Edward was also going. His eyes were narrow when Alice went off to find the rest of the family.

"What?"

"When Alice sings to herself then she's usually trying to hide something."

"When is Alice _not _trying to hide something from you?"

"Very true," he gave me a quick kiss and lead me downstairs.

We were already halfway to the national park we had decided on when I realized I needed to let Renesmee and Jake know where we were. Knowing my daughter, she'd probably think we went to Alexandria without her. After I sent the text message Alice came up behind me.

"Figure it out yet?"

I thought for exactly five eighths of a second before answering. "I'm going to be shielding them from Edward quite a bit for the next day or so won't I?"

"Well, they are in love..." she began leaning in closer to tell me more, her words only barely audible puffs of air leaving her lips.

Edward and Jasper had gone in a separate direction but circled around to find us, putting our conversation on hold. Alice bound off, grabbing Jasper as she went.

I was okay. I was okay with what was happening with them. I was. Really.

I saw Edward look bitterly in Alice's direction and then turned to me. "You won't tell me either, will you?" he asked, trying to look somewhat menacing.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I stifle a laugh and ran off following Alice and Jasper.

We were done hunting well before the sun rose, and I gave the rest of the family a head start. My main concern was what Alice had told me. Even though Jake was very skilled at watching his thoughts, Renesmee was the worst out of the bunch and I knew it was better to talk to Edward about it before hand.

"You told everyone to head home," he pointed out.

I took his hang, swinging it as we walked. "I did."

He stopped me and swung me around so I was caught in his arms. "That means you didn't want me to make a scene in front of them."

"You? Make a scene? _Never!" _I taunted.

"I have to say, sometimes I liked you better as the innocent, quiet, human," he retorted.

I was ready to retaliate but he began to kiss me instead.

"Just spit it out, Bella," he said, finally releasing me.

"Remember how you were all about virtue?" I was trying to remember the last time I was _this _nervous around Edward.

"Uh huh..."

"Well, you'll be happy to know that Nessie and Jacob feel the same way."

I was counting down in my head before the bomb went off. Edward may accuse me of having completely unexpected and inappropriate responses, much like our daughter, but he was easily marked.

"_What?" _

"I'm telling you so you can be _rational _later on."

"_What happened?" _The tension in his voice didn't dissipate.

"They had a talk about waiting, that's all." I was rubbing his shoulder while we walked but his back was hunched over. "I wanted to let you know in case you heard them thinking about it. I wanted you to be happy about their decision."

"They shouldn't be making that decision in the first place."

"Oh please, get off of your high horse, we were no different."

"She's technically only _seven, _Isabella."

He walked right into my trap. "And you were almost one hundred and I was what? Seventeen? If you're trying to bring age into it, it's not going to fly."

Edward lost the battle, and he knew it. As paternal as he was, he was also quite analytical if in the right state of mine, and everything I said was just that. It of course didn't stop him from avoiding Jake and Renesmee when we got home early that morning, while Alice and I did nothing to hide our delight. I wanted to pat myself on the back for the lack of emotion I felt when I first set eyes on them.

_I really didn't care_.

Before the happy couple left on a picnic, Alice grabbed Jake by the arm. Her minus five foot frame had to be on its tip toes to even reach anywhere near his ear, I could hear clear as a bell, "you're lucky that vision I had was hazy... or you'd be dead right now."

Jake turned his face up in a half smile, almost daring Alice to tell Edward more. He was turning to walk away before, to both our surprise, she stopped him again.

"She's going to ask you today... whether or not you've had other girlfriends."

My eyes met his in a long stare.

"Just thought I'd prepare you." Alice release him and he walked off, not bothering to look back.

Edward came up as my camaro drove off and Alice danced away. "I missed something again, didn't I?"

His overprotective nature made me so careful sometimes, but this, this could ruin everything, so I told him what Alice warned Jake about.

"Will we be able to survive that?" I looked up at him, praying he had more confidence than I did.

Edward, my pillar of strength, said nothing. He didn't know either.


	18. Itinerary: Edward & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Kind of a pivotal conversation between Edward and Bella in this chapter. Let me know if it makes sense--I know Bella and Jacob's relationship is a touchy thing. Oh and I forgot to answer the question people asked a few chapters ago. _Je t'aime de tout mon coeur _means I love you with all my heart. And I apologize for any strange formatting issues... it seems as though FF has been having some formatting errors after the chapter is published.

* * *

**Chapter 11 - Itinerary**

**Renesmee**

"I can't wait to see Egypt in person. I mean, I know I technically am there in those visions--"

"Nay..."

"But it's not what Alexandria looks like now and I--"

"Renesmee!"

My mind quickly played back the last few minutes of my rambling, realizing that Jake had been extremely quiet, and held a blank expression.

"Oh sorry, was I talking too much?"

He sighed and shook his head. "No, of course not. I was just thinking and... well I've decided that..."

His tendency to drag on uncomfortable conversations was definitely one of his less appealing qualities.

"Jake, spit it out."

"Imgoingtoalexandria."

I couldn't decipher the string of consonants and vowels and looked at him quizzically. "Huh?"

"I'm. Going. To. Alexandria." he repeated, emphasizing each word.

"Did you talk to my parents about that?"

"Well, no. But I don't see why not."

I couldn't think of any reason either, but I was positive my parents would.

And I was right.

"No, Jacob," my mom shook her head, running her hands through her hair. "Absolutely not."

My dad hadn't said anything yet, which was usually worse than his ranting.

"Why not?" I took my place at Jake's side.

My mom's eyes shifted in my dad's direction. "Edward?"

"Because," he was choosing his words carefully, "we have no idea what we'll be running into over there and Alice can barely see around you as is."

"Alice has to see around Jake constantly and she's gotten pretty damn good at it!" I argued.

A tiny voice from upstairs rang clearly. "She's right!"

"So what are you going to do between sunrise and sunset? Nay will be the only one that can go out and like you said, you have no idea what you'll need to do over there. You need someone else that _can _be seen in sunlight."

"He's right!" Again the third party voice from upstairs chimed in.

My dad growled deep in his throat. "Shut it, Alice."

My mom was nodding very slightly. I knew when she had been sold on an idea, her face was always very tell-tale.

"I'll think about it," my dad mumbled and walked towards Carlisle's study.

The second he was out of the room, Alice came down stairs, dancing around the railing like a ballerina. She dramatically swooped down the last step and practically into my arms.

"I see him buying four tickets," she whispered, her topaz eyes were sparkling with a silent laughter.

Carlisle came home from work that night with a large map of Alexandria. I took it from him and spread it out over the dining room table without a word. My parents, Jake, and Jasper followed after us.

The street names were all in the foreign Arabic script, but several landmarks were written in English, highlighted in bold print.

Quaitbay Citadel stood out immediately and I pointed at it. "That's what Ramses showed me."

"How far did you walk to get to the library?"

I bit down on my lip, my razor sharp teeth doing little to puncture my skin. "Ten miles maybe? But we were taking streets that may not even be there anymore. There were a few other landmarks he pointed out, but I think I need to find alternate routes just in case."

"Find them?" Jasper asked.

"I expect to see Ramses at least once more before we get there. At least I hope so..."

Carlisle had a thick permanent marker and began circling areas without explanation at first. "These," he gestured to the graffiti, "are some hotels that you can stay at. None of the larger ones, since I'd prefer to stay inconspicuous in such a foreign country."

"We walked west around the harbor to get to the citadel." I took the marker and crossed out several options that were much farther west from where he had taken me. "I know that doesn't help all that much."

Jake wrapped a secure arm around me. "You're doing fine, honey," he whispered to me and kissed behind my ear.

From my peripheral vision I could have sworn I saw my mom flinch. My dad was too engrossed in strategic planning of our mission to make a scene.

From across the large house I could hear my cell phone ring in my bedroom, but I ignored it, hoping everyone else would too.

I wasn't that lucky.

"It was Grace," Alice came in holding my phone. "You've been avoiding her."

I grimaced at her accusation, but she was right. "There are a lot more pressing matters I have to deal with right now, don't you think?"

"You love to throw the normalcy card in our face, Renesmee." My dad's attention had been turned back to me. "I will not allow you to just pick and choose which parts of it you can gripe about if you aren't going to do your part."

I glowered at him. "Let me know when you're done defacing the map so I can attempt to memorize it. Maybe it'll help."

I took my phone from Alice and went into my room, not that it would give me much privacy.

"Hi!" Grace answered on the first ring.

I tried to lightened my voice so the conversation wouldn't sound like the chore it felt like. "Hey."

"What happened to you?" she questioned. "I was about to drive to your place and see if your family was still alive. I mean, I knew they _were _alive, but I haven't heard from you and--"

I had to laugh at her enthusiasm. "I went to Washington, remember?"

I hadn't gone into details with her, since I couldn't really tell her how I went to visit my grandpa. It was inevitable that the question of why Edward (my "brother") and I didn't live with him would come up, and whatever horrible explanation I threw out would add just yet another lie to the tangled web I live in already.

"Oh, yeah, Washington." She paused on the other end of the line. I knew Grace got good grades in school, but she wasn't the quickest when it came to simple conversation unless it involved clothes, makeup, or boys. "Do you want to do something this weekend?"

Well, at least I had an excuse. "Actually, we're going on another vacation." This would just be a tiny lie. "Europe." Egypt was just way too random.

"Europe!" she proclaimed. "Oh Renesmee, I am _so _jealous! You're going to need to take a thousand pictures!"

"Sure," I promised. Wouldn't it be tragic if my camera broke?

I heard a ruckus coming from the library. "Hey Grace, I have to go, but I'll call you when I get home."

"I miss you, Renesmee! Please call as as soon as you get back!"

I nodded even though that meant nothing over the phone. "Bye, Grace." I flipped the phone closed and was already racing into the library in time to see a very upset Jacob march across the room.

"I'm _not _going then," he spat in Edward's direction.

My mom had a frown plastered on her face, and my dad's brows were furrowed in anger.

"What is going on?" I demanded.

Jake's breathing was quick, and I could hear his heart racing. "Edward was buying our plane tickets."

I rolled my eyes at my handsome boyfriend. "Let me guess, this is about money?"

He huffed at me and paced back to the opposite side where Carlisle sat in front of his computer. "Twelve _thousand _dollars per person, Renesmee. _Twelve. Thousand._"

"We're not going to Virginia, Jake," Bella pointed out. "Egypt is halfway across the world."

He pointed at the screen. "First class? Why first class?"

"Jake," I walked over to him calmly and slipped my hand in his his and I looked over at the computer monitor. "The flight from New York to Egypt is twelve hours, Jake. Do you _really _want to sit in coach for that long?"

He didn't reply, but I could hear him grinding his teeth.

"I need to you there, Jake." So, maybe I had promised myself not to use my new found ability of being his imprintee, but this was important. Money should not be an issue. My family had -- well, more money than I even cared to know about.

I could see the imprinting compulsion fighting Jake's stubbornness. "Damnit, Renesmee," he said in a deep, low, voice.

"Please?" I crooned.

He leaned down to kiss me hard and walked out of the room. I heard the front door open and close and even farther away I heard his footsteps. The two steps in an even rhythm halted suddenly and were then quickly replaced with four quick, soft, patters.

I wanted to follow him but my dad put up his hand, reading my thoughts before I could act on them. "Let him argue this one out with himself, Nessie."

"Alice?" I called upstairs.

"He's still going," she answered my unasked question. "Just let him tell you that, okay?"

We were planning on only being gone for five days, although two of those days would be taken up completely by traveling -- a flight to New York City and then a connection onto Egypt, and vice versa on the way home.

Jake showed up with a packed bag on Saturday morning -- he had given in just as Alice promised me he would. My mom met him in the living room and handed him an envelope.

"What's that?" I looked over her shoulder. Out of the package slipped a passport for one Jacob Wolfe. The picture was almost seven years old, but the man in it was unchanged.

"Jake wouldn't be leaving the country without one of these," she reminded me.

_"...she has what you need to get you in the air."_ The memory of her voice rang in my head, sending a shiver down my spine. I reflexively touched my chest, but there was nothing there. An empty feeling overtook me and I knew there was only one fix for it.

I didn't bother to turn the light on in my room, hoping to get back before anyone noticed I had left. I went straight for the cherry wood dresser that took up almost an entire wall, pulling out a small white box that held the only jewelry I owned -- it was one thing that never appealed to me.

The light coming through the window was dimmed by the clouds, but it reflected off of the locket I held in the palm of my hand. My thumb brushed across the inscription: _plus que ma propre vie._

"More than my own life," I whispered to the darkness.

I popped the locket's clasp, a picture of me and my parents smiled back at me.

"Renesmee?" Jake called from the living room.

I shoved the locket into my pocket and dashed out to meet the farewell party.

"Alice!" My mom's voice rang through the house.

My aunt was kneeling by our luggage, rummaging through Bella's bag in dismay. "_What _is this?" She held up a burgundy head scarf.

My mom grabbed it from her and stuffed it back in the bag. "We're trying to not stand out _too _much, even if we'll only be out after sunset."

Alice flounced off without another word, allowing us to finish our goodbyes.

Carlisle had just turned the ignition of the car on -- he was driving us to the airport -- when Alice popped her head through the open window.

"Here!" She threw a bag into my lap and was back on the porch at Jasper's side before anyone could answer her.

The large house quickly got lost in the dense forest as Carlisle wound the SUV towards civilization. I opened the bag, pulling out two beautiful silk headscarves. The first was an intricate mosaic of burnt oranges and browns, trimmed in a terra cotta lace. The second was a dark rose pink with the most subtle floral embroidery cascading down one side -- I fell in love with it immediately.

My dad looked over his shoulder and chuckled. "Only Alice."

The flight to New York City was six hours long, and I unfortunately did not inherit the immortal ability of being comfortable sitting like a statue for all eternity. Poor Jake at nearly seven feet tall, didn't complain at all. I, on the other hand twisted and turned the entire time.

The pilot's voice came on over the sound system. "Just an update folks. We are currently coasting over Lake Michigan and at the halfway mark of our trip today." I groaned at how cheery he sounded.

"Renesmee," my mom said from one row up, "enough of the sound affects."

"You're crabby," Jake determined. "What's wrong?"

I had lifted the center arm rest so there was no barrier between our seats, and pulled my legs up under me. "I need to sleep."

"Then sleep, beautiful."

I squeezed my way underneath his arm and closer to his warm body even though I was already hot in the stuffy airplane. I didn't care.

"I need to talk to Ramses. I wish I could contact _him." _

"You're stressing yourself out over it. You have time before we get there."

I sighed. "Yeah another seventeen hours."

Jake buried his face in my hair and mumbled something about frequent flier miles.

I didn't dream at all on the way to New York. When I woke up it was dark in "The City That Never Sleeps"_, _but it was still so alive. We barely had time to catch out connecting flight -- not a bad thing because the waiting was killing me.

An hour or two into what was becoming a seemingly endless journey, I drifted off to ancient Alexandria and my familiar friend.

"I need better landmarks." I said the second Ramses' face came into focus. It was daylight out, and although I didn't understand why Ramses would create a world that he couldn't walk into, I didn't care to ask. I began walking the opposite direction from our last trip before he could reply, desperate to narrow down the goose chase that was waiting for me.

A running odometer in my head kept track of how far I was going, while part of my mind held a running image of the large modern day map Carlisle had shown me. I had walked a mile or so through empty streets and blurry buildings until I was faced with a large massive monument. My eyes were crossing as I tried to put it into better focus, a part of me confused because it seemed out of place where it was. It looked like it could be found in Europe, and not in a land of ancient Pharaohs and Pyramids.

I pulled up the map in my head, slowly recalling one of the bolded words highlighting areas of interest. **The Amphitheatre, **it read. It was difficult to get a grip on its details, but it had to still be somewhat intact if it was to make it onto a map.

I walked back towards the hidden library where I knew Ramses would be waiting, making sure to burn everything into my mind. I had never relied much on my high capacity brain before, but I hoped my subconscious would pick up even more than what I was soaking in. The closer I got to the library the clearer everything was in Ramses' mind, as were the people. I was so absorbed with details I didn't even notice when I ran straight into two men pulling a wooden cart. A giant bell sat on it. Both men gave me a blank look and continued on.

Ramses wasn't in the abandoned room, so I made my way down the spiral stairs into the barely lit hideaway.

"What's with the daylight?" I demanded. "Did you not feel like helping me today?"

Ramses rolled his eyes at me and smiled. "Thought it would be better for your senses to see it in daylight also. Those are things I remember from my last day in the city."

"The amphitheatre will help me." I felt badly for snapping at him and changed the subject.

He nodded, organizing imaginary scrolls and books. "It will be hard to miss."

"It's construction is different than the other buildings. Why is that?"

"Romans built it. Long time ago."

I was dragging my foot through the sandy floor aimlessly, when I rather important question came to mind. "What do we do after we find the library? After we find the prophecy?" I don't know why it had taken me so long to even think about it.

"Ask your mother," he said mildly.

I looked at him crossed-eyed, completely taken back by his answer.

"Good luck." And with that, Ramses waved his hand at me kicked me right out of his world.

For a split second I felt myself in Jacob's arms, the altitude uncomfortable in my ears, and I knew we were still in the plane. It was too quick for me to grasp anything as I fell back into a semi-conscious sleep.

_"I probably won't think she's good enough for you. I wonder how jealous I'll be." _I had heard those words before in a story, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

I tried to figure out where I was, and why the voice sounded so incredibly familiar, but the real life sounds of Jake's light snoring and the jet's engines were obscuring my thoughts. I held tightly onto the fantasy, trying to piece together the hazy setting. It was a bedroom, with someone in bed. I wasn't staring in this dream as I did in so many others. I was a spectator now.

_"That part might be kind of fun." _Was that Jake? I couldn't see his face, and the voice sounded like it was speaking through a tunnel.

I could tell I said his name out loud by the vibrations in my throat, and without warning I was jarred out of my daze.

It was Jake who had woken me up, shooting up from his seat like a jack rabbit. I thought I had startled him when I had said his name, but he looked at me much with much too much concern.

"What's wrong?" I asked nervously.

"Uh--" Whatever had happened, he was left disoriented. I thought he glanced back at my parents, but my awkward position in the seat didn't allow me to turn my head completely around. "Nothing, just didn't know where I was for a second."

I was still wary. I rarely saw Jake as keyed up as he was then, but I could see how it was possible.

"I saw Ramses. I think I have a better idea how to get there now."

"That's good." He kissed me softly but his heart was racing still, keeping up with my abnormally quick heart rate. "Now you can stop stressing." His lips found mine again. And again. It wasn't helping the speed of either of our hearts.

I pulled him closer to me, scooting myself up against the window seat so my parents couldn't see us, and kissed him harder. It was so utterly inappropriate that I should have been embarrassed, but when it came to kissing Jake, it was more like an addiction. We calmed down and I eventually fell back to sleep for the rest of the flight.

My ears popped when we descended into Cairo's airport, and I was abruptly tossed when the wheels bounced on the blacktop. Jake was kissing me the second I opened my eyes.

"I didn't know someone could sleep for that long," he teased.

I was robotic leaving the plane, my legs only a little sore, probably much less so than Jacob's. He thought I hadn't noticed, but he was wincing as he bent his knees back and forth. We got our luggage and found a van to get us to the train station, the final two hour leg of our trip.

My dad went to stand in line to buy tickets, and Jake excused himself to find something to eat and to stretch his legs. I was left alone with my mom, with the strangest question was ringing in my head.

"Mom, you know that other boy you like?" My child-like mother raised her eyebrows, waiting for me to finish my question. "How did you love him and Dad at the same time? It seems impossible to me."

She sat down in the chair next to me. "Well, I told you it wasn't the same kind of love, right? It's just... in the absence of someone, sometimes you have to rely on others and that makes you grow closer."

"Jacob told me."

Extreme panic crossed her pale face. "_He what?_" She was trying to stay composed, and at the same time was looking at me, like she was confused with my reaction -- or lack there of.

"How Dad left for a while. That he was trying to protect you."

"Damn imprinting," she muttered, her voice back to a normal octave. Something had seriously spooked her but that wasn't it. "He used to do that when you were little too -- tell you and give you anything you wanted -- didn't make it easy on us as parents. But yes, Edward did leave for several months, and Jake was right, he did it because he loved me and thought I would be better off without a vampire as a boyfriend."

Jake told me those were dark times for my mom, but I wouldn't repeat that to her. I could see the haunted look cross her face as she pulled up the old memories, and I was sorry that I had asked her about it in the first place.

"So you never loved that other guy?"

"I told you, Renesmee, I did love him, but Edward was always it for me. From the first day we met, I never had a choice."

"So kind of like vampire imprinting?"

"Actually, that's exactly how I describe it."

Jake was it for me too, and I was thankful for that.

***

**Edward**

I looked up from my book -- a book of Bella's actually. One that was completely in French, which she insisted I read -- and looked over at my wife. I was so attuned to her that even the slightest out of place action never failed to grab my attention.

She was staring four rows up at our daughter and Jake. Renesmee's head was on Jake's shoulder, and his head leaned on hers. His thoughts were void of dreams, while I saw my daughter wandering around Egypt in hers. I was sick of the entire prophecy ordeal and quickly blocked her out.

I focused back on Bella, her eyes were glazed over with the look I had seen so many times over the years -- one that fit no description in particular.

"I'm sorry," I said gravely.

Her head was still turned away but I could tell her eyes were closed. "Edward."

We sat there wordlessly at first, my head filled with the low hum of the jet engine and the calm dreams of the sleeping passengers surrounding us. Sitting completely still was as natural for us as blinking was for a mortal, and we did just that for another hour.

"You need to stop," Bella said flatly, breaking the silence.

I swallowed hard. "It's my fault that you have that hole in your heart. And now it's empty again."

"You are my heart."

I shook my head, taking deep breaths. "Not all of it."

"Edward, I love _you_."

I put my finger under her chin, turning it so she'd have to look at me. "I know that, love, and it is something I will never question. But I broke you, and he put you back together."

"It's not like that." Her breathing was shaky and she looked away again.

"Isabella." My voice was straining to continue, but I couldn't.

Even when I returned to her there was one piece of her heart I was not allowed to have back. Her heart gave that part to Jacob for safe-keeping, so even if I hurt her again she would not be completely destroyed. He would be able to rebuild her.

It's not that she is still in love with Jake, nor does it have anything to do with jealousy towards Nessie. Her heart lost the only other person who she trusted to protect it. I know she can feel it whether she is aware of what _it _is. That's the look I catch on her face. That fragment is empty again, and it shows.

"Maybe," she said out of nowhere, "it would help if you could forgive yourself."

I didn't know what to say to that. She was asking me to do something completely inconceivable.

The french novel no longer held any interest for me, and I reclined my seat, taking Bella's hand in mine. Out of pure habit, I picked up Jake and Renesmee's thoughts again. Alarmingly, I realized they were awfully similar.

_That part may be kind of fun._

Frozen wasn't even a term to describe how solid my body went.

"Edward?" My hand was pinning my wife's to the arm rest. "Edward, what is it?"

She couldn't know about this. She couldn't know it happened again. "Nothing, love." I forced myself to relax. "Just some obnoxious thoughts in this place."

She couldn't see him from where she was sitting, but Jake's eyes flashed in my direction.

_I'm sorry, Edward. I'm so sorry._

"Would you mind...?" I squeezed her hand. She squeezed back and suddenly my head was null of all voices.

_***_

At the train station, after I purchased our tickets, receiving very cautious thoughts and looks from the people around me, I didn't immediately go back to where Bella and Renesmee were waiting, but followed Jake across the busy terminal to a snack cart. Although I was definitely angry at him, I had to laugh when I saw his blank face and heard his forlorn thoughts.

"Here," I handed him the correct currency. He narrowed his eyes, his thoughts questioning my kindness.

I laughed darkly, eyeing the bag of chips he picked out. "I may be ticked off, but I'm not going to let you starve."

"She just thought it was a dream," he said softly. "She hasn't--"

"Yet. She hasn't put anything together _yet._"

"Does Bella know?" I was positive that Bella scared him more than I did most of the time.

I shook my head. "No, I thought it best not to tell her."

Jake opened his bag of chips, shoving a handful into his mouth. Immediately, his face twisted up in disgust before swallowing painfully.

"What the--!"

I broke into such a loud laugh, almost everyone in the station turned around and looked at us. "You should have asked me to translate, kid."

Jake pursed his lips together and studied the bag. "Cheese. It says cheese, right there! Like Cheetos!"

I pointed at a little cartoon sea creature floating across the bad. "Cheese and cuttlefish."

He turned five shades of green and then finally stark white. "Cut--cuttlefish?" he stammered.

"Yes. Same family as the squid and octopus. Cuttlefish." He glared at me, his thoughts far from kind, but I only grinned. "I said I wouldn't let you starve. I'm still ticked off."

Jake excused himself to go back to the bathroom, and both Nessie and Bella were giving me dirty looks when I returned.

"Oh please," I stopped Bella before she could say anything. "It's all in good fun."

Nessie huffed and crossed her arms. "Sure, at Jake's expense. Why did you say you were mad at him?"

I managed to keep a completely serene expression and even smiled. "Don't you worry about that."

It was after sunset by the time we finally reached Alexandria. We had been traveling for twenty-two hours straight and I could see the wear and tear it took on Jake and Renesmee. There would be no searching for the lost library tonight.

"I still don't think they should have their own room," I grumbled, trying to get the wrinkles out of a shirt and finally just hanging it in the closet of our hotel room.

"They sleep together every night, Edward," Bella said, exasperated. "Deal with it."

"We should attempt to hunt tonight," I said off subject.

"Yeah, that should be interesting. You know Emmett will want a play by play."

It was true that Emmett's excitement over our trip centered around the unusual feeding possibilities here in Africa, and I know upon our return he would be sorely disappointed.

"I think we're going to be stuck will wildebeest and gazelles." Bella had done her research when the topic first came up, and found that most of the larger animals and predators on the continent were endangered. There was no way she would allow us to hunt lions, leopards, or elephants. Only my vegetarian vampire wife would also be an animal activist.

I would never admit it to her, but venom filled my mouth at just the thought of catching a lion. It had to be ten times better than any of the mountain lions back home.

"This is it, you know," I said as we danced across the sand, hours later after all of Alexandria had gone to sleep.

"What is?" Bella slowed down.

"The last night before our fate is sealed. Nothing will ever be the same after tomorrow."

Bella only looked reached for my hand and I allowed her to pull me into the dark, strange desert.


	19. Alexandria: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **.

**Chapter 12 - Alexandria**

**Renesmee**

From the light color of my parents' topaz eyes the next morning, I figured they went off hunting last night while Jacob and I took full advantage of being able to sleep in a real bed.

I had a dreamless sleep, void of both odd Jake-involved dreams or any visit from Ramses. Although a part of me wished I could have seen Ramses once more, the plus was that I slept soundly and when the sun came through the thin curtains of the hotel room the next morning, I found excitement had replaced my nerves.

"So we're off to look around," I told my parents as they sat in their darkened room.

My mom was absent-mindlessly flipping through the television channels and nodded without looking at us. My dad sat in the corner reading a book.

"Please be careful you two," Edward said sternly. "And take this."

Jake reached out and took a book of common English-Arabic translations. He opened to a random page and snickered. "Are you serious? Hal ta-ta-call-a-moo -- oh nevermind!"

"What were you trying to say?" My mom turned the TV off and joined the conversation.

"The only one I'll be using. 'Do you speak English?'"

"Hal tatakallamu alloghah alenjleziah," my father said easily.

We all stopped and stared at him.

"Edward, you speak Arabic?" My mom raised an eyebrow, clearly amused.

"Sure," he shrugged.

"I didn't know that," she said.

He walked over to her and kissed her. "I have to stay somewhat interesting, don't I? It's only been a decade, I need to keep you guessing." He leaned down and kissed her again before she could come back with any kind of retort.

"Alright, we'll make due some how," I interrupted.

I pulled Jake, who had a dumb smile on his face, by the shirt out their door.

"You know what they'll be doing all day while we _work," _he taunted. I only groaned and shook the images out of my head.

I must have been so worn out from traveling that I hadn't really taken in any of the surroundings when we got in the evening before, because the scene of the street in front of me stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Nay? What is it?"

"I thought -- well, I don't know what I thought, but I didn't think this."

No sandy streets, no clay-stone buildings with low cloth overhangs. Builings that were stories high stretched the length of the paved road in front of us. Cars drove by, their fumes stinging my nose. One honked at a woman who ran across the street.

The pedestrians were all dressed in modern, but loose fitted clothing, the women all wearing head scarves. I immediately put mine on, using the reflection in the hotel window to make it look somewhat decent.

I saw Jake eyeing me ardently. "You look really cute in that," he said in a low voice, running his fingers down the silk scarf and onto my cheek.

I gave him a half-hearted smile; I had too much on my mind to appreciate the compliment fully. I reached into my backpack and pulled out a brochure I had gotten from the hotel concierge. "We need to go that way," I pointed. "Citadel first, and then the amphitheater."

"Whatever you say boss," Jake said, taking the backpack from me and flinging it over one shoulder.

I could pick out the other tourists as we walked the streets, but I by far stood out the most. My skin didn't sparkle in the sun like the rest of my family, but the glow to it was unmistakable in the bright African sunshine. Jake could almost fit in with his darker complexion if it wasn't for the fact that he was so freakishly tall and muscular.

I tried to only concentrate on the map in my hands in order to get to the Citadel, not wanting the directions from ancient Alexandria to skew my perspective. The woman at the front desk suggested we take a taxi, but once I saw the traffic I knew that was out of the question.

The farther we got from the hotel, and the stronger the scent of the ocean became, the more similarities between the scenery and Ramses' visions I began to notice. The structures closer to the harbor were older and the construction much more ornate and artistic in comparison to the noisy urban life we had came from. We walked through a bazaar, and although a part of me was itching to keep moving, I couldn't help but admire the quaintness of the tables of handmade items and fresh produce that was set up.

An interesting smell came from a food stand that was built into the first floor of one of the buildings.

"You hungry?" a short, chubby man asked in halted English.

I could hear the sizzling of deep frying oil behind him and my stomach growled. I looked over at Jake who was always hungry, and he nodded his head eagerly.

"What is that?" I said slowly, unsure of the extent of his English skills. He was placing a deep fried patty into a thick pita and handing it to a patron next to us.

"T'aamiyya," he said quickly and began to explain what it was before I could ask. "Much close to falafel. You know falafel?"

I nodded even though I had never tasted a falafel before. Chickpeas were not something I cared for.

"Tomato, onion, parsely, tahina, fava bean." The man ticked the ingredients off on his fingers. He had obviously practiced that for the tourists. "All in pita. Good, yes?"

"Sure! Two, please," Jake said before I could mull over my decision any longer.

I took out the money my dad had given me; their paper currency was much prettier than the American dollar. I was planning on keeping a few of them. Even the coins were much more detailed than ours.

"Twenty pounds," I was told, and handed him a ten pound "note" as they call them.

As we walked away I saw Jake had only taken one bite of his pita.

"Do you not like it?" I asked, disappointed.

He grunted. "That was a little bit of a rip off, don't you think?"

"A rip off?"

"_Expensive._"

I laughed loudly and pulled him to me. "Twenty Egyptian pounds is like four dollars in American money, Jake."

He pursed his lips for a moment and without saying another word he scarfed down his meal.

We walked quite a bit farther until the harbor was straight out in front of us. I could see the thing stretch of road that looked like it lead right out into the blue sea, if it weren't for the monstrosity of a castle at the very end.

"Wow." Jake's mouth dropped.

"You're telling me. It looks identical to the visions."

"So, where to?" He pulled out another map, one I had marked up with possible paths I had taken with Ramses. I didn't really need it -- one of the benefits of perfect recall.

"This way," I pointed at the road that hugged the harbor.

I pulled memories from our walk, along with anything I could have seen that may still be around. Unfortunately, the direction we were heading in was turning into yet another area of modern day Alexandria. There was not a single sign that the world Ramses' lived in had ever existed. When I knew we had walked too far in one direction, Jake would note the perimeter on the map, and we'd back track and go another direction.

By afternoon we had a rough sketch of possible places, but it wasn't all that much help -- it still spanned several blocks in all directions.

"How 'bout we go to the amphitheater?" Jake suggested, noticing my frustration.

I sighed, and nodded, defeat coloring my attitude. "We need to figure this out by the time it gets dark out. It will be too suspicious to wander around at night."

"We'll fine it, honey," Jake took my hand, "I promise."

"It's not your job to find it," I muttered. "This is _my _destiny. _My _fate."

"My point is proven then. Your fate, my fate -- same thing."

I wanted to kiss him right then and there, but knew it would be improper in such a conservative culture.

The energy the strong sun was taking out of me must have been obvious to Jake, because he managed to flag down a taxi to take us the rest of the way to the ruins before I could object. I hadn't realized how worn I was until I sat down in the stuffy car.

It had been a bit blurry in the visions, but the leftover ruins of the amphitheater were impossible to miss, as Ramses promised.

"Alright," I sighed again, "let's get this over with."

It was depressing to walk back the direction we had just come from. It didn't help that the cab hadn't pulled away yet and I could feel the eyes of the driver on us as we walked the opposite direction of the tourist attraction.

The only positive thing was that the search area was getting smaller thanks to having two landmarks. The several hundred negatives were knowing we would have to search every inch of it.

"This. Is. Impossible." I sat down on a bench, huffing.

"We'll find it, Nay, we will. Trust Ramses, okay?"

Jake knew me well enough to know what to say. I had come to trust Ramses over the last year and I had to keep doing so. I knew I did.

Then I heard bells. They chimed a wordless tune as they rang from somewhere high up. Bells.

Romans built the amphitheater.

Romans built churches.

Churches have bells.

The last thing that happened when I saw Ramses was I ran into the men carrying... a bell.

I sprang to my feet before I had even finished my internal conversation.

"The church, Jake. The church!"

I ran as fast as possible through the streets of Alexandria without drawing any inhuman attention towards myself. The sun was low in the sky now, and dropping out of sight more quickly by the minute. Jake hadn't caught up to me yet; my sudden epiphany had caught him off guard, but there was no time to waste.

The ringing had stopped and I was lost in a maze of small side streets. A man was standing in another one of the food stands from earlier and he smiled at me.

"English?" I asked in haste. "Do you speak English?"

He squinted one eye at me. No, of course not.

"Church?" I prayed the word would mean something to him.

He only shrugged and shook his head.

Where was Jacob with that damn book when I needed it?

I mentally ran through all of the maps of the city I had been looking at, trying to come up with something he could understand. What was the name of that church?

My mind found it on the huge map Carlisle had brought home.

"Saint Catherine's?" I asked again.

His eyes brightened in understanding. He pointed down another street. "Salah el-Din," he said. I took that as being a street name.

It was almost twilight by the time I saw the street sign I was looking for, and I had slowed down a bit so Jake could find me. I could see how frantic he seemed when he finally came into focus.

"What the heck, Nay!"

"Yell at me later. It's here. It's got to be here somewhere." I could see the bell tower from the intersection we were standing on.

We hurried towards the cathedral, the street bringing us up from behind. Small buildings lined both sides of it. They looked old.

"Are you sure, Nay?" he asked skeptically.

I thought for exactly a quarter of a second. _My_ destiny. _My_ fate. "Yes."

"Well, let's go get your folks then."

Everyone begged me to sleep for a few hours before we went back out, but I couldn't. I paced our hotel room in front of the window, watching the lights of the city slowly dim as Alexandria fell asleep.

"You're making me anxious," Jake said, wrapping his arms around me. "Are you going to make me calm you down?"

I rolled my eyes at him, but still leaned back against his huge chest as he kissed from my ear down my throat. He was so tall that he was able to continue on and reach all the way around and find my lips. Once he had those, I was putty in his hands. I let him turn me around, his hands now holding my face, and smother my mouth with his own.

I knew my dad was going to overhear this. "Jaaaaake," I breathed, but the attempt to sound stern didn't work. I didn't stop his hands as they went up and down my body, even though my mind was screaming at me to stop him.

"My-- my-- parents..." I tried again.

It was no coincidence that just as the words left my now very busy lips, there was a knock on the door and it opened revealing Bella and Edward standing on the other side. My mom was trying to hide a smile, my dad was plenty annoyed.

"Let's go," he said sharply.

While I blushed all shades of red and couldn't bare to make eye contact, Jake only smiled at them sheepishly, like he had been caught stealing a cookie.

The church ended up being not far from the hotel. I laughed to myself thinking at all of the miles we had walked when it had been only blocks away instead. My dad who had kept a straight face since walking in on us, couldn't help but let a chuckle loose.

"At least it wasn't _in _the hotel," he joked. Both my mom and Jake looked over at us, knowing they had missed the first part of the conversation.

We were now standing at the front of the church, a tall staircase and stone columns greeting us on either side.

"So... you guys won't burn or nothing when you go in there. Right?" Jake asked. I think part of him was being sarcastic, but the other part -- the part when he grabbed my hand -- was honestly worried.

My mom just shook her head, smiling comically at him, and walked up the steps with my dad in tow.

In any other frame of mind, I may have actually appreciated the sight of the cathedral with his ancient stone carvings and intricate stained-glass windows, but I was on a mission and all I could think about how very many places we were going to have the search through.

"This is going to be impossible!" I hid my face in my hands, sitting down on a bench.

Out of the darkness we could all hear footsteps coming towards us. Jake and my dad instinctively, while also unnecessary, stood in front of us.

"Excusez-moi?" A light and airy voice said, appearing from the shadows. I raised my head and saw a round little woman in a black and white nuns habit rushing down the aisle towards us. "Puis-je vous aider?" The accent to her French words was one I had never heard before.

I knew Jake didn't speak French, so I took his hand to translate.

_She wants to know if she can help us, _I told him.

_Why is she speaking French? _

_Not sure. It's just probably the language of choice for this church._

The woman was obviously nervous at first, but my dad's fluid and eloquent French immediately put her at ease.

_He's telling her we just arrived and our schedule is all off. That --_ I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from laughing.

_What?_

_He's just really good at lying. Make sure I don't forget this._

The nun left us after my dad's extremely long and detailed fabrication.

"You could have just said we came to pray," my mom hissed at him too low for the woman to hear as she rushed back down the aisle.

"We don't pray, love," he said. "That would be lying."

She narrowed her eyes at him but didn't speak out loud.

"Shall we get on with this witch hunt?" I stood up and began to walk out of the church.

"Renesmee, where are you going?"

"Well it's the bell that made me think of the church. That means the church was already _here _or at least it was being built. The library entrance wouldn't be in it. It has to be in one of the buildings surrounding it."

All three of them looked at me, incredulous.

"Did I not mention that?"

"No, no you didn't," my mom said tamely. "We'll check the buildings to the left. You two check on the right."

"It was a doorway with stairs," I added before we parted. "But I'm thinking now we need to look for something built into the floor."

The first two buildings we went into were abandoned, and had been for sometime. I could hear the impossibly soft sounds of bugs and mice scurrying up the yellow stone walls. The floors were stone also -- completely solid. We checked every square foot from top to bottom but there was no hidden library in either of them.

I glanced down at my watch -- three in the morning -- if we were going to get anything done we needed to get it done soon.

"It'll be okay, Nay," Jake said, trying to comfort me for the millionth time.

The third building, the last one before we hit the corner of the street, had a light on inside. We stole looks in the windows, seeing an elderly man sitting by a glowing lamp, a book in his hand. We went around the entire house, looking where we could. I saw nothing that could possibly be a secret passage, but we wouldn't be able to know yet.

"We'll have to come back when he's either gone or asleep," I whispered.

"Look what time it is. You sure he's not a vampire?"

I punched his arm. "You would be able to tell sooner than I could." Jake's sensitivity to the scent of vampire was a hundred times stronger than mine was.

As we walked back towards the church I was trying to hold onto the hope that my parents had found something, but I knew that if they had they would have come and found us immediately.

"I'm not leaving here until we find it," I mentioned, trying to sound aloof.

Jake held his hands up in front of him stopping my rant. "You can take _that _up with your parents. I'm just here as your personal tour guide and body guard."

"Tour guide?"

Jake grinned, the moon reflecting off of his teeth making them seem ten times brighter next to his dark skin.

I could make out the murmurs of my parents at the other end of the block. Just as I was about to rush to find them, something stopped me.

It was a flash...a memory...a scene. I looked down the narrow ally between the church and the building directly to it's side and I could see through to the street that crossed behind it. And there again was the flash of...sky...of stars.

I cocked my head to one side and started down the uninviting narrow, Jake following without asking for an explanation. It was so small that we could barely fit walking next to each other, and had to walk in single file instead.

I stood silently at the other end and looked up. They were the stars I had seen the night Ramses had taken me to the citadel. These were the exact same stars I could see looking through the entrance to the library.

"It's here. It has to be _right here._" I started feeling along the walls, knocking to listen for any signs of that the other side was hollow. My dad must have heard our thoughts because they appeared out of no where and began looking too.

I was slowly taking steps backwards, trying to match the exact memory of the vision to what was in front of me now.

Then my foot hit something.

The metal made a dull echo, but it rang in my ears ten times louder than the church bells.

I fell to my knees, following the hinge that I had hit, moving several inches of dirt and sand that had piled up. It was flush against the wall, but that part of the wall was wood, not stone. I easily pulled the wood from it's nails and felt around underneath. My fingers hit stone -- stone that the old buildings were made of -- and I felt the crevice of a slab.

My already fast-paced heart picked up faster than I ever thought possible. The four of us were now tearing down the wooden wall at inhuman speed until it was clear what was behind it; a door built right into the ground.

My dad lifted the heavy stone with ease. It was obvious that even if a human had come across it, it would have taken at least three very strong men to open it. The air that blew from it was stale, but smelled like parchment and old leather.

This was it.

I could see stairs, but it was about a five foot drop into the darkness before we could reach them. I began to lower myself into the hole when both Jake and my dad grabbed my shoulders.

"One of us should go first," Jake demanded.

I shook my head. "No. This is mine."

I was ready for more push back from them but got none, and continued my decent into the cavern.

The candles that were lit in my visions were there, but there was obviously no flame to them. The wicks were burnt down but long enough to stay lit for a reasonable length of time.

I looked back at my family following me down the stairs. "How do I do this without matches?"

My dad pulled out a lighter from his pocket. "Alice called."

"Do you need that?" Jake asked.

"My sight isn't as strong as yours. I can't see in pitch black." My vampire senses were dumbed down by my human half.

I lit the candles as we followed the spiraling staircase -- the one I had been down so many times.

The air was cooler being so far underground, and the lack of all sound was eerie. The stairs ended and I stood at the opening of the room. The soft glow of my single candle danced on the walls, on the massive bookshelves, on the wooden tables covered in scrolls.

Jake passed me with another candle, lighting others that were scattered across the room. My parents walked by me also. They all turned and stared at me.

"What do we do now?" Jake asked.

The now brightly lit space numbed me into silence.

"Renesmee?" my father urged.

"Just... just hold on. Let me take this all in." It hadn't be _real _before now_. _A part of me had always wondered if it would ever _be _real; if we'd ever find it. But here I was, standing in my destiny.

The table Ramses had shown me sat covered in centuries of dust, just where it had in his time. It called to me in the strangest way. I forced my feet to move one in front of the other, my hand reaching out long before I got there.

"Renesmee?"

"Nay?"

I was probably making them nervous but I couldn't stop.

My hand finally reached the table and the scroll sitting on top of the pile. My fingers found the edges as I pulled it apart. If this were a movie, this would have been a cue for dramatic lighting and a choir of song to begin. But here in my life, the only lights were the few candles, and the only sounds were our hearts and lungs.

I felt my eyes well up with tears of pure emotion as I looked down at the Arabic script. "Here Dad, you'll need to read it."

***

**Bella**

"What if we can't find it?" I whispered to Edward, reaching for his hand. "You know she'll never be the same if she fails at this -- she really thinks this is the reason for her entire existence."

Edward ran along the walls, listening for any hint of a possible secret passage way. "I don't know," he answered, his voice flat.

"Alice didn't see anything?"

He pulled a lighter out of his pocket. "She said we'd need it."

It wasn't like Alice to be so vague, especially when so much was riding on this trip -- and by so much I meant our lives. "That's it?"

"She said she can't see anything here, like she's blocked from it."

"That's kind of strange, don't you think?"

Edward ran his fingers through his messy bronze hair and sighed. "I honestly don't know what to think anymore. Sometimes I question what we're even doing here, but other times I believe it -- or at least I believe our daughter."

My mouth opened to speak but Edward lifted his head listening to voices I could not hear. He motioned for me to follow him; he must have heard their thoughts.

"What is it?" I asked quickly.

"Renesmee thinks she found it."

I saw Jake and Renesmee in a narrow ally, feeling around for anything that shouldn't be there. The determination on her face was almost frightening. All I've ever wanted to do was protect her from the horrors of life in both the mortal and immortal world, but here she was, dead smack in the middle, wanting nothing to do with being protected.

Much like Edward, I couldn't decide whether or not to take the prophecy and our "destiny" seriously -- especially the part about me being a queen. If anything I wanted it to be real for her. I remember --even though they are muddy and becoming more and more distant the longer I'm immortal -- feeling helpless once too.

I was hesitant to look along with the rest of them, until I heard the resonating sound of metal. I froze.

I watched Renesmee and Jake desperately pull wooden boards from the wall before I comprehended exactly what was happening -- more like comprehending that this was _actually _happening. I hadn't finished my thought Edward had lifted a stone door from the sandy ground.

Jake tried to stop Renesmee from dropping into the darkness. "One of us should go first." I knew he meant either him or Edward. I had given into the possibility that the two most important men in my life would always try and be my knights in shining armor, regardless of how unnecessary.

"No. This is mine." I couldn't bare to disagree with her.

I dropped myself into the hole and landed on the top of a flight of clay and stone stairs, Edward's hands guiding me down.

"How do I do this without matches?" Renesmee asked holding a candle.

"Alice called." Edward tossed her the lighter.

"Do you need that?" Jake asked.

"My sight isn't as strong as yours. I can't see in pitch black." Just another example of Renesmee feeling more useless around us.

I could see it all before the flame from the candles reached the room. The ceilings were at least twenty feet tall and bookshelves stuffed with ancient history reached all the way to the top. Several tables were splayed about, each one covered in more journals and papers.

Jake walked into the room. "What do we do now?"

"Renesmee?" my father urged. Her silence was unnerving.

"Just... just hold on. Let me take this all in."

Minutes passed as her eyes flickered from one end to the next. They stopped at one specific table and in halted movements she made her way towards it. I could see her hand shaking as she reached out in front of her, like she was grabbing for something only she could see. She looked like she was in a trance.

"Renesmee?"

"Nay?"

I had stopped breathing, and could hear both her fluttering heart, and Jake's steady beat pick up pace. Renesmee's eyes filled and she handed the scroll she had picked up to Edward.

"Here Dad, you'll need to read it."

I had never seen such hesitation in Edward before. This was making it all _very _real. His eyes scanned the Arabic writing and I could see all of his preconceived notions go out the window. He believed.

"Uh, the language is rather outdated..." he stuttered, something he just doesn't do. His breathing labored, his eyes blinking rapidly. "I'll have to... paraphrase."

He paused for a long while, reading through the illegible, faded writing. "The end of the royalty has been foreseen." He stopped and swallowed hard. "It says the Prophet's Child will be born and she will be able to straddle two worlds. That it is in her power and her power alone to find the Chosen Ones -- the Golden Eyes." I wasn't sure if he was going to be able to continue, the way his pale skin looked drained of all life. "The Chosen Ones and their guard dogs will confront The Corrupt in the last battle of the worlds, which can only be ended by the Queen. They will see Heaven, and then Hell. That is when it will end."

Renesmee took one long gasp after another, each one I could tell was getting more difficult. Her hands flailed behind her trying to reach for something. Jake's arms were around her, helping her to the ground, and stayed there with her as she regained control of her breathing.

I was frozen in place. Edward's words from the night before were echoing through my head. _Nothing will ever be the same after tomorrow._

"Now what?" Jake, always the one that took everything in stride, was looking at us.

I could tell my daughter was withholding something by the nervous expression on her face. "Well Ramses said..."

"What?"

She bit her lip and looked directly at me. "He said to ask you."

I shook my head like I had misunderstood her, but I knew I had heard correctly. "Me? Why the heck would I know?"

Renesmee shrugged.

"What's with the Heaven and Hell bit?" Jake scratched his head, looking over Edward's shoulders as if the chicken scratch meant something to him.

"Ramses said that the prophecy isn't to be taken literally. He explained that the prophet who saw the vision saw the wolves and interrupted them as guard dogs." She turned and looked at me, her eyes softer than before. "You aren't _really _royalty. I don't know what was meant by that."

"Good to know," I muttered.

"Maybe you'll get some kinda epiphany?" Jake suggested. It was probably the closest explanation any of us could come up with.

"We have to go." Edward was facing the spiral staircase and the faintest light was peeking down.

Edward and I had to duck in and out of the shadows, even though the streets at dawn were still practically empty. I saw the worry creasing Edward's forehead, yet Renesmee looked relaxed and borderline delighted.

I caught wind of a familiar but old scent only a second after Edward did. He was frozen, listening mental voices. We were now in the lobby of the small hotel, the woman behind the front desk eyeing us suspiciously.

"Is that?" I started to ask but Edward shushed me with his hand.

Jake and Renesmee came in right behind us, Jake smelling the strange vampire presence well before my daughter did. He gave me a concerned look; his brain did not have the same capacity as ours and he wouldn't know who to attach the scent to.

Alice had seen this when she finally saw us in Alexandria, but it had been pushed to the back of my mind until now. Was it a friendly visit? Was he working for the Volturi?

Edward stood outside our hotel room for a moment, taking in any thoughts he could before facing what was on the other side.

We opened the door to our hotel room and standing by the window, the sunrise causing his face to sparkle, was Amun.

"Amun," Edward nodded cooly as he turned towards the door.

Beneath the crystal skin I could see his olive tone, off set by his blood-red eyes. His face was not unfriendly, but it was hard and almost...sad.

"I am sure you can see the reason I'm here," he spoke slowly towards Edward.

"Bits and pieces. Your thoughts are quite jumbled."

"How did you know we were here?" Jake practically barked. He was not at ease, the instincts of his ancestors still prominent.

"Do I know you?" Amun looked amused rather than frightened at the beast of a man standing over him. He took one deep breath, his face twisting in discomfort. "Ahh, my apologies. One of the wolves, yes?"

Jake's jaw clenched and I saw Renesmee pull him back towards her.

"Where is Kebi?" I asked, realizing his mate was no where to be seen.

"In hiding."

"Why don't you explain to us what you're doing here," Edward suggested as the tension in the room rose.

Amun sighed, again sadness taking over his face. "Two months ago I came across a nomad from Russia. He had been a part of a coven, but it had been--" Amun paused and Edward gasped "--decimated by the Volturi."

"Wait, what?" I asked, alarmed.

"The only reason he escaped was because he had the ability to cloak himself. The Volturi came looking for abilities. They were looking to build their guard -- an army, actually."

"Anatoli..." I whispered.

Amun looked surprised. "That was their leader. You know of him?"

I nodded my head thinking of the tall, silver-haired man who had met us in Virginia. My mind wandered to the memory of Élisabeth, my French angel, and her family, who had left Anatoli's coven once she realized he was playing both our side and the Volturi's. I was glad she was safe in Quebec.

"Anatoli came to us because of a rumor he had heard -- that we would take down the Volturi. He said he'd be on our side, but we found out later he was telling the Volturi the same thing." Edward explained, staring off into space.

"If it is any consolation, which I am sure it is not, they refused to join the guard. The Russian, Ivan is name is, told me that Aro thanked them for their time and told them they were free to leave. Once they turned their backs the little blonde one began to attack them with her ability to inflict pain. Their larger guards took the rest down one by one. He escaped because their tracker cannot find him when he is cloaked."

"Where is Ivan now?" said a quiet voice behind me. I had almost forgotten Renesmee was in the room with us. She had her back against a wall, hiding in the shadows.

"That I do not know. What I do know is that the Volturi have overstepped their ruling." Coming from the vampire who wouldn't even touch Renesmee, and would barely stay to witness against the Volturi, such a statement truly meant something.

"What do you want from us?" I asked.

He looked at me again and I realized the sadness I saw was from centuries of trusting a system put in place to protect the immortal world, only to have it turn against him.

"The Russian told me about the _prophecy_." I noticed the emphasis on the word, as if calling Edward's bluff from earlier. "I just happened to catch your scent here, but I would have eventually come to you."

"Come to us for what?" Jake was growling deep in his throat.

"To warn you. You must be ready for when they come. They will come. They have...others already."

"Please, Amun," Edward begged. "Tell us everything you know."

And so the morning hours dragged on, Amun giving whatever sparse details Ivan had been able to pass on to him. I knew we'd never find the lone Russian. Not with his cloaking ability.

"They introduced to them new members. They had these new members explain how _happy_ they were serving under the Volturi." The bitterness in Amun's voice was unmistakable. "The one woman could absorb any physical energy thrown at her and convert it into her own physical strength."

So that means our brawny fighters like Emmett or the wolves would be useless against her. Jasper though, he was skilled enough to know how to fight without such force. That may work.

"There is a man who can manipulate memories; change them as he wishes for positive or negative reactions. Ivan watched him test it out on Anatoli, and within seconds he was positive their entire coven had been killed. The man did that."

That was dangerous, but ineffective against my shield. And still the best it would do is confuse someone.

Amun interrupted my lost thought. "Then he spoke of a young boy--" I could tell immediately by the break in his voice that this was the line that pushed Amun over the edge. "The Russian said he could not have been older than the twins and obviously _very _new to this life. His young immortal age may be your only advantage."

"Telekinesis," Edward murmured, picking the thoughts from Amun's mind.

"Tele-what?" Jake whispered in my ear.

"Telekinesis. He can move things...with his...mind." It was a terrifying thought and probably more powerful than Jane or Alec's gift if used the right way.

"But he is so young that his emotions and instincts will be above those of skill and reason," Edward explained and then turned and winked at me. "Not even Aro can magically make a vampire skip it's newborn stage."

"Do you think that Aro created him?" Renesmee was closer to me now.

"I do," Amun said, sighing. "He must have seen a powerful latent ability in him, much like they saw in your mother before she was turned."

I heard Jake's stomach growling and it wasn't until then did I notice how high the sun was in the sky. Neither him nor Renesmee had eaten breakfast. "Jake, Nessie, why don't you get something to eat."

"Nay?" Jake looked over at her. She nodded and they left, Jake's arm protectively around her.

Edward turned back to Amun. "You may have saved us all, Amun, I don't know how we can ever thank you."

"Just finish what the prophecy began. Please."

The power hungry vampire I remember from seven years ago was no longer the one standing in front of me. He hadn't even asked if we had come across Benjamin since they parted ways. He was humbled by what he had learned.

"We see Benjamin and Tia from time to time," I volunteered. Edward nudged me.

_He's fine, _I promised.

Amun's face brightened only a fraction. "How are they? Where do they live now?"

"In western America. They actually care for another hybrid child, Audrey. She and Renesmee have become friends."

"Well I look forward to seeing them all."

This struck me by surprise. "Seeing them?"

Amun gave me a huge grin, as if something I said amused him greatly. "The battle. I know I am not much of a fighter, but I would think the larger the number on your side the more Aro may take notice. He must understand the enemies he has made. And I am quite positive my ever-confident creation would be by your side at a moment's notice."

Amun would...fight with us. And Benjamin. Benjamin had an offensive power; control over the elements. We would need to fine tune his usefulness, there was not much time during the last confrontation, but we knew more now.

I had again lost my focus and didn't notice Edward's silent disagreement as Amun made his pledge. "We don't want a battle. We won't go into this thinking such ways."

"Edward," I said seriously. "It doesn't matter what we want anymore. It's been sealed, remember?"

My husband only closed his eyes.

Amun stayed until dark, curious about the life Benjamin and Tia had made with their new addition. We didn't mention the Volturi or their new acquisitions -- there would be plenty of time to worry about that.

Before he left he shook Edward's hand. "Send for me and I will be there. I will bring along anyone I can find. I will make sure others know of the Volturi's betrayal."

I thanked him again for the hundredth time, but he stopped me. "You stopped them the first time, we all know that, and you will be the one to stop them again."

"Don't be silly," I laughed. "We need many more offensive powers than we have now. A defensive shield won't do much good."

The Egyptian looked from me to Edward and back again. "How oddly you deny it. You are very strange." I took that to be some type of compliment, but he was gone before I could say anymore.

Renesmee and Jake got to explore the rest of the city as tourists the next day, and went back to board up the wall to the library, keeping the secret once again. I on the other hand, spent even more alone time with Edward. I was getting spoiled at this rate.

"When do you think we can have our own place again?" I asked, with one leg and arm across his body.

"Hmmm, maybe we should wait until we don't have the small issue of evil vampires ready to kill us."

I leaned up on my elbow and kissed him. "I'd actually be more afraid of Alice and Esme than the Volturi."

Edward laughed and for the first time in a long while it sounded real. "We'll see," he promised.

"What did Amun mean when he said I was odd? What am I denying?"

In one quick flip Edward had me on my back and was holding himself over me. "Who knows."

I was about to accuse him of lying to me, but I became otherwise distracted -- very much a part of his plan.

***

I was running battle scenarios through my head during the twenty-odd hour trip back to Oregon. The most important players would be Benjamin and Élisabeth's brother, Gabriel, who could freeze objects in mid-air. He is another one we needed to test out and find the extent of his ability. Then there was Zafrina, who was our version of Alec, and able to blind anyone she wants. It would be up to her to defend me, and for me to block well...everyone. We would have Jasper and other skilled fighters like Peter go for--

"Isabella!" Edward snapped in my ear.

"What?"

He huffed in frustration. "Where have you been? I've been trying to talk to you for the past five minutes."

"Just thinking. Sorry."

He face softened and leaned over to kiss my forehead. "No, I apologize. I know it's a lot to take in."

I knew he was worried, and that is why I kept my mouth shut. I couldn't let him know I was already putting together a strategy to fight the Volturi. I couldn't tell him. Not yet, anyways.


	20. Recruits: Edward & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Sorry sorry sorry for such a long break. I had a lot of things going on and every time I sat down to write I found myself writing other sections of the story! I couldn't stop! This was a hard chapter to write because it was transitional. There is obviously a lot of foreshadowing and the next chapter is going to be hella emotional in more ways than one, so although it won't be as long of break, it's going to probably take some serious writing and rewriting.

**Chapter 13 - Recruits**

**Renesmee**

My mom looked extremely content the entire way home, while my dad had that look to him -- the one that I think is only obvious to me. The one that made him go straight to his piano when we finally got home, and play his dark melodies.

I was overwhelmed.

"It's real," I whispered to Jake through the darkness of my room that night. "I...I don't know why I didn't think it would be."

"I don't think any of us did completely. We were all in some form of denial."

"Bella seems pretty confident, don't you think?"

He didn't say anything but I could feel him nod behind me, pulling me in closer and kissing my hair. I know he was trying to get me to sleep, but with the rest of the family awake, I didn't want to miss anything. I tossed and turned in his arms for another ten minutes before pulling away.

"I can't sleep," I huffed.

"So I've noticed," Jake answered in the middle of a yawn. "Let's go get this over with."

There was no one in the living room when I got to the spiral staircase.

"Can we do it now?" I asked the empty room, knowing all vampire ears would hear me anyway.

One by one my family filtered in from various places and took their seats at the dining room table. Somber was the general mood in the room, and not even Jasper tried to change it. Sometimes we needed our feelings, and this was one of them.

"I can't bring myself to commit our family to a death wish," Carlisle said softly. Our almighty leader was not confident at all, which was very frightening.

"We don't have a choice, Carlisle," my mom replied. She still was the only person who looked at all positive about the situation. "If we don't take them out, they will take us."

Carlisle closed his eyes and looked down at his hands; he was defeated. "People will die."

"Yes."

Bella's answer startled us all. My dad's eyes got wide and sad at how matter-of-fact she sounded.

Alice's face was void of all emotion. Whether she was blocking it all out on purpose, or Jasper was protecting the love of his life, I wasn't sure. She didn't look like Alice at all.

Jasper and Emmett looked thoughtful, probably thinking of a battle plan. Rosalie and Esme both looked like they were going to be sick -- if that was possible. Jake's expression was calm, but he was holding my hand so tightly I knew that his face was only a facade.

Then I looked across the room to the mirror that hung on the wall and studied myself. I could see the concern there -- a little in my eyes -- but at the same time I could see the excitement.

"The prophecy has been right so far," I pointed out. "We will win this."

My mom smiled at me, most likely happy to see not everyone felt as if we were signing over our lives.

"I've already talked to Audrey," I added, ignoring the face my dad was giving me. "She's on her way with Benjamin and Tia."

"And I've called Élisabeth. She and Gabriel will arrive later this week."

"Bella," my dad growled. "Both of you should have talked this over with us first."

"No, Edward," my mom snapped back. "This is going to happen."

"It will..." Alice's faint voice came from no where. "It will happen."

My dad winced as he saw whatever Alice's vision had told her. That is why she lacked emotion -- she was on overload.

"School starts next week," Esme mentioned. "I guess we'll be pulling you all out."

I briefly thought back to almost a year ago when all my day consisted of was dragging my way through juvenile classes and gossiping with Grace during lunch. But that was before Ramses, before the Prophecy, before all of this. Nothing would ever be the same; we were all changed now.

"We'll start Friday," Carlisle sighed. "I will make my way around Europe with Esme, Emmett and Rosalie will go to Africa. The rest of you will have to take care of the Americas. Covens, the nomads... we will need all of them."

"I'll call up to La Push." It was the first time Jake had spoken all night.

"Jake..." My mom was about to interrupt but saw the look in his eyes and stopped herself.

"Don't think of it as us fighting for you," he half-teased. "They already met us once. If--," his voice broke off, "--they'd come for us anyway." I knew what part he left out. If we lose here, they would move onto La Push. They would take out the tribe next. "If" being the key word, because _if_ we lost, we would be dead.

No one spoke after that. The only noise was Esme, who was now clinging to Carlisle, sobbing tearlessly into his chest.

"But it's alright," my mom reassured everyone. "I've got some ideas that I'm going to run by Jasper. We've got a lot going for us."

"You have...ideas?" My dad sounded horrified at the thought of my mom planning out the war.

"Well," she said delicately, "I figured already that Benjamin and Gabriel are our best offense, depending who else shows up of course. Zafrina can protect me and my shield, which can stop Jane and Alec. The biggest problem will be that new boy that has telekinesis, but that's where our offense comes in--"

The clattering of my dad's chair stopped Bella mid-sentence. "Enough!"

He was seething mad. I don't think I've ever seen him this angry before in my seven -- almost eight -- years of life.

"Edward..."

"What is going on?" He was practically crying. "My _wife _is talking about battle strategy? Offense? Defense? Protecting you? No! We can't! I can't allow this to happen!"

"You don't have a choice, Dad."

All eyes turned to me, and for once being the center of attention didn't seem so appealing. I thought from Rosalie I saw a hint of...blame. Like this was in some way, my fault. I shouldn't really be surprised, of course. Like mother, like daughter, I suppose.

_Do not even think that, _Jake said. Everything we thought was readable now to each other, so there was no filtering as long as we were touching. Wasn't sure yet if I liked that or not.

_Nay._

Drat. _Sorry, _I looked sheepishly at him.

I had forgotten for a moment I had been the last person to speak, and the room was still waiting for an explanation.

"Haven't we been trying to fight this long enough? Can't you finally accept it? Well, you _have _to accept it, or let it drive you mad...because it's coming."

Silence again. I felt a wave of calm pass over me -- a cue from Jasper that the room was getting too weighed down with emotions.

Alice eventually up and walked out of the room, something very uncharacteristic of her. Jasper followed her without question. Carlisle and Esme were soon gone too, and Emmett and Rosalie not far behind them.

"I'm going to call Sam," Jake said softly, and walked out.

I was left facing my parents, in an awkwardness I had never felt before.

"I'm supposed to protect you...both of you..." My dad's voice was fading.

My mom smiled gently at him and pulled his chair closer to her, lovingly combing her fingers through his hair. "Not always. You must have learned that by now."

Jake came back in and kissed me on the top of my head. "Can we please get you to bed now, honey?"

There it was again -- my mom's face. I know it was something, and whatever it was I could tell my subconscious knew it, yet I couldn't put my finger on it.

_***_

Two days later Audrey arrived with Benjamin and Tia in tow. I was actually still sleeping when my bed began to bounce up and down, and I woke up to Audrey's uncontrollable giggles of excitement.

"What the hell?" Jake sprang up from besides me, half growling.

"Oh crap!" Audrey fell off the edge of the bed and onto the wooden floor in shock.

I scrambled to help her up, laughing at both of their expressions.

"You could have mentioned this," Audrey gestured at Jacob, "in your e-mails!"

I smirked but then took in her in for a ridiculously long hug. "It's been too long," I whispered in her ear. She didn't reply, but nodded into my embrace.

Jake rubbed his hands over his face and got out of bed, mumbling something about breakfast. I saw Audrey's eyes go wide when he got out from underneath the blanket without a shirt on. Once he was out of the room we broke out in hysterical giggles again.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen! Seriously?"

I was blushing ten shades of red by then. "How am I supposed to write about that in an e-mail?"

"Pictures work!"

I don't know how long we talked for, only that by the time our names were being called from the living room it was well into morning.

"Ben! Tia!" I hugged each of the Egyptians. It was strange that only in seeing their olive pallor did I realize I hadn't seen Ramses since before Alexandria...

"We hear you've gotten to visit our home?" Benjamin asked, pushing my own thoughts aside.

"Yes, Alexandria was beautiful!" I lifted myself onto the kitchen table and grabbed a fresh muffin from the assortment Esme had put out. My mom cleared her throat, pointing out my inappropriate use of furniture, and I slid down giving her an apologetic look. "Did they tell you about Amun?"

"Yes, your parents gave us the details," Benjamin said carefully. I wondered if he still had hard feelings when it came to his former coven leader. "It is nice to hear that he has changed his views."

"Are you going to help us fight the Volturi?" I asked anxiously.

"Renesmee!" both of my parents scolded at the same time.

Benjamin raised his hands to calm them down. "It's fine," he promised. "Her eagerness is reassuring. She is after all, the Prophet's Child." This time he turned to me and winked.

I had hated that title for so long, but now it just sounded..._right_.

Audrey joined me and Jake for breakfast while everyone else went into the adjoining living room to fill Benjamin and Tia in on the search party plans.

I know Jake was awfully bored listening to us chatter on like school girls, especially because we would give each other sideways glances when there would be an inside joke referring to him and break out laughing.

"I have class," he said, kissing me as he got up from the table. "I'll be over after I do some work at the shop tonight?"

He always formed sentences that should be statements, as questions. Did he think I would say no?

"Mmmhmm," I said into his lips, allowing him to kiss me again. "Miss you..."

He smiled and kissed me on the forehead. "Ditto."

We went back to giggling once he was out of the room, and I could hear an annoyed growl come from his direction.

"You're so lucky! He's amazing! Both of you together are amazing!"

I grinned and looked towards the front windows where I could hear his bike grind to a start. "Yeah..." There wasn't much else I could say on the subject. I was lucky...so insanely and incredibly lucky.

"That imprinting impulse is so strange, but I guess it worked out for you."

I wondered then if Audrey would ever find someone. I guess one day she may come across another vampire? There was always the question though, whether or not she would be strong enough to _be _with a full blooded vampire, since she was so much more human than I was.

_Note to self: Tell Jake how lucky I am to have found him._

My dad was standing at the open door frame of the kitchen, definitely reading my thoughts.

_It's true! I am lucky! _I repeated purposely for him to hear.

He barely nodded in agreement so Audrey couldn't tell, but then noticeably gestured for us to follow him as he turned and walked back into the living room.

"...Élisabeth and Gabriel are already taking the long route and will be covering Canada on their way here," my mom was explaining.

"Is Adrianna not with them?" Carlisle asked. Adrianna was Gabriel's mate and could make humans younger or older.

Bella shook her head. "She doesn't have the skill to be of help here, and Gabriel fears for her life."

I was disappointed that we had our first person back out, but I couldn't really blame her... or Gabriel for that matter.

"It's for the best," my dad said to me.

"Edward is right," Jasper looked over in my direction. He must have felt my mood go sour. "And we will need to make that clear to those we come across. Although large numbers may be more intimidating, it actually does more harm to have inefficient fighters on our side. We'll end up fighting to defend them, and get off goal."

It made me smile, albeit inappropriately for the position we were in, to hear Jasper talk military. It probably didn't hurt that he was radiating confidence off of himself and onto us.

"We will begin at dusk," Carlisle said with a sort of finality to his tone.

"What do we do?" I asked.

"You, Audrey, and Jacob need to stay here," Jasper ordered. "We'll have guests arriving at all times."

My mom was standing in front of my dad and slumped back into his arms. "This all sounds way too familiar," she groaned.

Of course it did, only last time they were asking our friends to be witnesses, not soldiers.

"Now, Benjamin," Jasper sat on the ottoman opposite the Egyptian, "what can you tell me about your ability..."

They began talking offensive strategy, and the only other person clearly interested in it was my mom who had her own "ideas" as she stated earlier. My dad's face turned to stone and he walked out.

"Let's go!" I tugged on Audrey's arm.

"But I want to listen!" she retorted.

If Adrianna was unskilled and couldn't fight, then Audrey _definitely _couldn't fight.

_Wait, can _I _fight?_

I decided to let Audrey be and headed outside to the garage, where I always went to be alone.

"Me too," said a dark voice from inside the building.

"Daddy?"

Edward stepped out of the door and smiled awkwardly. "For some reason I come out here when I get overloaded. I guess you got that from me."

"Mmmm," I pondered. I wondered what he had overheard me thinking. _Damn it, Nay, he can hear you now. Damn it!_

Maybe he was really good at faking it, or maybe he really was so overwhelmed that he couldn't process my thoughts, but my dad had no reaction to my rant.

"Why does it upset you so much that Mom wants to be involved?" I asked, sitting on the hood of her Camaro.

"Deep seeded problems of mine, Nessie." He came over to me and ran his fingers through my hair and stared into my eyes. "I'm overprotective, you know that."

"Yeah..."

He closed his eyes and kissed my forehead. "But we're all going to be okay, right?" He was smiling and his voice sounded positive, but it was fake and forced.

"Yes," I nodded, raising my chin to make him look me in the eyes again.

He did, and this time his smile was softer. His head tinted to the side and he pursed his lips, as if he was about to say something, but his attention turned toward the house instead. "Looks like it's time to get ready to go."

I looked behind me and saw the sun begin to take it's final descent down the cloud covered sky.

An hour later Jake walked in with two large duffle bags in hand, just as the search parties were gathering the last of their necessities.

"Moving in?" I teased.

He raised one eyebrow and looked down at me, the side of his mouth turning up in a controlled grin.

"Seriously?" I looked from him to my parents.

My dad winked, but gave no comment, but my mom's eyes were calm, but she nodded. "For logistical purposes only," she added.

"Logistical?" Audrey furrowed her brow, confused.

Everyone but my dad burst out laughing. Poor Audrey had been so sheltered by her aunt (who was absolutely terrified of her) that she still was slow on things like subtlety and sarcasm.

Jasper handed Benjamin a tiny black cell phone. "I take it you know how to use this?"

The young man rolled his eyes and playfully jabbed Jasper's arm. "We're not _that_ feral."

"So try and call Jacob when possible for updates, and--"

"Jacob? Why can't they call me?" I huffed.

"Mmmmmkay," Jasper lingered, "call Jacob _or Renesmee, _when possible. We're going to do what we can in three weeks, and regroup."

Saying goodbye to my parents made me feel like I was the little girl my birth date said I was. The only times I had been separated from them in the last few years was if we didn't hunt together, and that was only for a day or two.

My lip started to quiver, and at the same time I blushed pink because my emotions were embarrassing me to no end.

"It's good to know that my baby girl is in there _somewhere_." My dad tapped my chest where my heart is. "It makes me feel more wanted."

"Dad..."

He hugged me instead of saying anything else. "See you in a few weeks. Be good."

It was much harder for my mom to let go of me. "Mom, we'll be fine, I promise. I have Jake with me, what can go wrong?"

Her smile was distant, but it was still there. "Please try and keep any antics or great ideas," she glanced quickly down at the scar that ran the length of my forearm, "to a minimum."

"I know, I know," I sighed. "Like mother, like daughter." I hugged her again, as Alice pulled her free arm.

My entire family, along with Benjamin and Tia, disappeared into the forest which was now only lit by pale shades of purple and orange, as the sun blessed us with the last bits of daylight.

The huge Cullen mansion was eerily silent, being void of so many of it's usual residents.

"Are you hungry, Nay?" Jake came up from behind me, wrapping his arms around my middle.

I leaned backwards into him and shook my head_. No._

_Are you okay? _he asked making me face him.

_It's a lot to handle._

As Jake was nodding I saw Audrey's eyes narrow. "Uh, hello?" She waved her hands in front of us. "Can we have a rule that says things need to either be spoken out loud, or made so I don't know you're talking in the first place?"

I muffled a giggled. "Sure, sounds like a rule."

"I don't know how people live with the two of you. Or Alice. Or Edward."

"We're easy to love, of course!" Jake was smile was contagious and Audrey's face soon matched his.

The rest of the night passed slowly, our thoughts solely fixated on what was heading our way. I couldn't even recall the movie we watched, my thoughts were so far off.

"I'm going to turn in," Audrey said, stretching. "Wake me up in the morning?"

I repositioned myself in Jake's arms and nodded, hiding a yawn of my own.

_Let's get you to bed,_ Jake said lifting me up.

"No, no, not yet!" I tried to squirm away, but he was too strong.

"I didn't say you had to _sleep." _His serious expression turned into a mischievous smile, as he carried me the rest of the way to my room.

"Jake?" I asked, attempting to sound indifferent as I picked up the mess I had made in my room.

"Hmmmm?" He was laying on my bed, his hands behind his head, looking very handsome.

I was afraid to ask, mainly because I knew it would hurt my feelings and I'd get all emotional; he hated when I did that. My back was turned to him, but I could see his reflection in my dresser mirror.

"Nay...?"

"I was just wondering... with that," I pointed to the duffle bags in the corner, "if this is _your _room too now?"

"Come here," he demanded.

I still had a shirt in my hand and I was twisting it nervously when I sat on the bed with him. He took it from my hands and threw it into my hamper. "You can be so silly, sometimes, Renesmee."

My head was down, but I was looking up at him through my eyelashes. "What's that suppose to me?"

"Well, you're nervous for no reason. But to answer your question, I don't know."

My heart dropped, and my face must have also because he was cupping my cheek and lifting it up.

"Let me finish before you start pouting, please," he pleaded. "I don't know because I don't want to give your parents a heart attack. You still don't seem to understand how hard it is for them to be okay with me even sleeping in here with you. You're seven, Renesmee."

"Almost eight," I sighed. It sounded so horrible when said out loud.

"Exactly. They never got to raise their daughter. Can you please give them a tiny bit of leeway on this?"

I didn't answer, but crawled under the covers next to him. _They're probably going to pull this for another decade, until I actually turn eighteen. Is that when it'll be okay for me to have sex? Will I be able to get married then?_

Jake's arms tightened around me. I had to get better with the hole mind reading thing.

"Yes you do... we both do. We can't seem to control it anymore." He hopped out of bed and opened one of my windows, allowing for the late summer air to fill the room.

I was about to ask what he meant by that he has to too; he_ never_ let any of his thoughts slip, but he was back beside me and I decided to leave the topic be for now.

I crawled on top of him and took his bottom lip in my mouth, and then trailed kissing across his prominent jawline and down his neck.

"You... and... your... mother..." he said in halted, airy, words. "Two little vixens."

"Shhh," I said, silencing him with my lips. "Stop bringing up my mom while I'm trying to seduce you." I ran my hands over his bare torso, and followed the lines down his hips and to his thighs.

"Renesmee..." he said sternly, reaching for my wrists, and pulling them back up into a safer area. "No."

"Yes!" I huffed.

"I thought you wanted to wait?" he challenged.

"I changed my mind!"

Jake covered his face with his hands and groaned. "You _know _how hard it is for me to say no to you! Please don't let me disappoint your parents."

"My parents, my problem."

"They're also two of my best friends! You seem to forget this isn't just about you and me... they are _my _family too!"

I had never given much thought to the dwindling line of the Black family. Jake had never been close to his sisters, and both his parents were gone. He loved his pack brothers, but his loyalty always has fallen to our family first...even before I was born.

"Fine," I relented. I understood, but was much to stubborn to admit to it.

"I love you," he said as I took my proper place in the crook of his neck.

"Ditto."

*******

**Edward**

"You have...ideas?" I had to force my voice to work, because my lungs had become null of all oxygen.

My wife had ideas on not only how to fight, but how to fight against the Volturi. I felt hollow inside, as I had when I had left her all those years ago. I had lost her then and I had now resigned to the fact I may lose her now.

"Well," Bella began, eyeing me the entire time, fearing my reaction before her words had even been said. "I figured already that Benjamin and Gabriel are our best offense, depending who else shows up of course. Zafrina can protect me and my shield, which can stop Jane and Alec. The biggest problem will be that new boy that has telekinesis, but that's where our offense comes in--"

I was on my feet, yanking at my hair. "Enough!"

"Edward..."

"What is going on?" The hollowness was overpowering. It was painful. "My _wife _is talking about battle strategy? Offense? Defense? Protecting you? No! We can't! I can't allow this to happen!"

"You don't have a choice, Dad," said a small voice, so calm and wise, it was difficult to find a reply. "Haven't we been trying to fight this long enough? Can't you finally accept it? Well, you _have _to accept it, or let it drive you mad...because it's coming."

Jasper calmed the room down finally, and one by one each member of my family left the dining room except for myself, my wife, and my daughter.

"I'm supposed to protect you...both of you..."

"Not always. You must have learned that by now." Bella moved closer to me, brushing my hair from my face and placing the other hand over my fist that was clenched tightly in my lap. I dared to look at her, because I knew already the determination she had. I was lost in her topaz eyes, and the ferocity in them.

"Can we please get you to bed now, honey?" I heard Jake say. He must have come back into the room while I was being enamored by my wife.

I picked up three things at the same time: Bella indescribable expression of pain, Renesmee's curiosity when she noticed it, and the guilty, forlorn look in Jake's eyes when he looked between the two of them.

It was later that night, after Renesmee was safely in her dream world, when Jacob came out to the living room to confront Bella.

"I don't know what it is," he said in monotone. "I mean, I do, but it has to stop. You need to learn how to cover it up."

"What are you talking about?" Bella snapped.

"She's going to figure it out, Bella. I know the dreams I send to her aren't helping, but she can see it in you; we _all _can see it. She can't put her finger on what it is yet, but she will and it's going to be soon."

I was angry with Jake for confronting Bella as he was, but at the same time, as much as I knew her feelings were beyond her control, she had been wearing them a little too much on her sleeve. I didn't have the guts to confront her about it; when it came to Bella's feelings I could never bare to hurt her. Jake, on the other hand, never held anything back.

"This is so none of your business!"

Jake shook his head, and a low growl rumbled in his throat. "This has just as much to do with me as it does with you. Don't even try that card. You two are the ones that are just hoping she never finds out. Newsflash, she has an _eternity _to figure it out. But don't worry, I know her thoughts as well as Edward does, and her guesses are getting closer. You won't have to wait nearly that long."

The sarcasm in his voice was getting too bitter for my liking. "You've said what you came to say, Jake."

_It would be better if we told her, Edward, before it gets out of hand. _

Perhaps it would be, but Bella would never allow it.

"Goodnight, Jacob," I said, ending the conversation.

We sat in the living room in silence after he left. I waited an hour, when Jake's thoughts became hazy with dreams, before I spoke.

"Bella, love? Are you alright?"

She scoffed at me and stormed off to our room. That was a no.

I followed her, catching the door before she could slam it shut. "Bella..."

"You could have stood up for me, you know! You're my husband, aren't you supposed to be on my side?"

"This isn't a black and white situation, Bella, there aren't any sides..."

Her harsh words were unnerving, a part of me shivering with the anger behind them. "To hell with that! He wants us to tell her. He's practically threatening us!"

"Isabella Cullen," I said sternly, taking her by both shoulders. "You cannot try and tell me that you honestly think Jacob Black, _your best friend_, would do that to you, do you?"

Her face went blank, except her eyes which were no longer gold, but a dark and frightening onyx. "I'm going hunting."

"Bella, stop--" It was useless, because I was talking to thin air now. I heard her talking to Alice and Rosalie across the house, and then there was silence.

I walked back into the living room, the hair on the back of my neck standing on end. Emmett and Jasper were eyeing me, pity coloring their faces.

"That's rough, man," Emmett said, turning on a video game. It sprung to life, chirping and buzzing.

"Keep the volume down," I hissed, but my anger quickly dissipated. I looked over at Jasper.

"Just trying to do my part," he said. "I wish I had some good advice for you."

"Don't worry about it," I sighed, slumping down on the couch.

_***_

Although Renesmee didn't seem to notice at all, the tension between Bella and Jacob stuck around for a couple of days. Jake actually acted like nothing was wrong, which got under Bella's skin even more than if he had been bitter towards her.

I was afraid to even bring up my next idea, but at the same time we had to talk about it before Renesmee was awake and aware. It was odd how the tables had turned, being that I had been the one pushing against Nessie and Jake's relationship.

I felt pathetic for bringing Carlisle as a reenforcement when I finally got the nerve to talk to Bella, but I didn't want to fall to the power she had over me.

"You think he should do what?" she shrieked.

"Move in," I repeated, although I knew the question was rhetorical.

Carlisle patted her on the shoulder. "Bella, I believe it is the best thing for now. It doesn't have to be permanent."

Shouldn't he be calming _me _down right now?

"I've already spoken to Jake about it, he's bringing his stuff over tonight."

Her eyes had lightened after hunting, but they were boring into me like daggers at that moment. "Fine, whatever."

"And Bella, can you please make up with Jake? Please?"

"Fine!"

I wasn't sure if she was just appeasing me to get out of talking about it, but our conversation was cut short when we smelled approaching visitors.

"They're here!" Alice said, dancing towards the front door, opening it before the three vampires on the other side had a chance to knock.

"Audrey!" she squealed, jumping into the surprised girl's arms.

We exchanged hellos with Audrey, Benjamin, and Tia. While we quickly caught them up on the details of our trip to Egypt, Audrey ran off to wake up Renesmee.

_Probably should have warned her that Jake will be in the bed! _Alice pointed out, but I ignored her.

Jake emerged from upstairs, looking disheveled and groggy.

_Stupid girls. I was sleeping. _

I chuckled to myself, and Jake looked over at me. _She still ticked off?_ he asked, referring to Bella.

I shrugged as he walked into the kitchen.

An hour later, Renesmee and Audrey joined us, and my ever enthusiastic daughter couldn't help but be inappropriate.

"Are you going to help us fight the Volturi?"

"Renesmee!" I snarled, hearing Bella's voice echo mine.

"It's fine," Benjamin said with a kind smile. "Her eagerness is reassuring. She is after all, the Prophet's Child."

That title was becoming the bane of my existence.

I was of no help while Jasper began to hash out details with Benjamin. And my wife, who was once upon a time so naive and delicate, was in the middle of the conversation. Eventually my emotions were too much, and Jasper was too involved to notice the aura of my mood.

I walked out of the house, unnoticed by everyone but Nessie, and found my way to the garage which had oddly become my solace the last several years.

_If Adrianna was unskilled and couldn't fight, then Audrey definitely can't fight. Wait, can I fight? I need to think. The garage works. I like the garage._

I heard Renesmee walking from the house towards me, her one sided conversation extremely amusing.

"Me too," I said from the darkness of the garage, commenting on her last thought.

"Daddy?" My heart melted whenever she said that.

"For some reason I come out here when I get overloaded. I guess you got that from me."

"Mmmm." _What did he overhear me thinking? Damn it, Nay, he can hear you now! Damn it!_

She was horrible at watching her thoughts around me, so I didn't push it.

"Why does it upset you so much that Mom wants to be involved?"

My melted heart began to break. "Deep seeded problems of mine, Nessie." I stood in front of her and touched her curly hair and found my Bella in her eyes. "I'm protective, you know that."

"Yeah..."

"But we're all going to be okay, right?" I kissed her forehead, smelling the strange sweet scent that was original to her, and only her.

"Yes," she said firmly, forcing me to look at her. It was difficult to find her eyes, but when I did, I couldn't help but smile. I wanted to tell her that it would be okay because I had a plan of my own, but it was only when I heard Alice's thoughts from inside did I realize what time it was.

"Looks like it's time to get ready to go."

I found Bella in our room, switching out her every day clothes for sturdy traveling clothes.

"This stuff makes me look frumpy," she frowned into the mirror, fixing the jacket she was wearing.

I slipped my arms through hers and kissed her nose. "You always look beautiful. And did you just use the word frumpy?Is Alice finally rubbing off on you?"

Outside a motorcycle turned onto our long road. "We better go meet him," Bella said, giving up on her outfit.

We walked into the foyer just in time to meet Jake.

"Moving in?" Renesmee asked sarcastically, eyeing the duffle bags.

I couldn't help but enjoy the surprise, something I never thought I would.

"Seriously?" she said in shock, looking at us.

"For logistical purposes," Bella pointed out.

"Logistical?" Audrey cocked her head to the side. She took the cake for naiveté for sure.

"I take it you know how to use this?" Jasper handed Benjamin a phone.

"We're not _that _feral," Benjamin laughed and punched him.

"So, try and call Jacob when possible for updates, and--"

"Jacob? Why can't they call me?" Sometimes Renesmee's eight year old emotions really came through.

"Mmmmkay, call Jake _or Nessie,_ when possible. We're going to do what we can in three weeks and regroup."

Renesmee tried her best not to cry when we said our goodbyes.

"It's good to know that my baby girl is in there somewhere. Makes me feel more wanted."

"Dad..." she rolled her eyes.

"See you in a few weeks," I said, hugging her. "Be good."

I thought Bella would actually find someway to cry as she said her goodbyes.

"Mom, we'll be fine, I promise. I have Jake with me, what can go wrong?"

"Please try and keep any antics or great ideas to a minimum," she ordered. Bella knew as well as I did, Jake or no Jake, if Nessie wanted to do something bad enough, it would happen.

"I know, I know. Like mother, like daughter."

Bella hugged her again, Alice having to pull her out the door, blowing kisses until we met the woods.

_***_

We traveled for four days before coming across anyone. Jasper and Alice had gone south, and Tia and Benjamin came with us. I was surprised when it was Peter and Charlotte's whose scents we picked up. The old friends of Jasper's from his days in the southern newborn army were just as startled when we crossed paths.

"Edward," Peter shook my hand strongly, but at the same time there was a hint of apprehension. "I'm going to guess that this isn't a casual visit."

"No, friend, I'm sorry to say it isn't."

My throat closed up; I didn't think it would be so difficult to ask this of our friends. Then the words flowed from my lips, my mind recalling them on autopilot, trying to keep my feelings at bay. Charlotte's tiny stature became more and more stiff, and she was nervously twisting her white-blond hair.

Peter closed his eyes. "I had a feeling this would one day be a part of our future."

"We have a plan," Bella blurted out. "We have others with us already who will be able to build upon our strength. We need you. Both of you."

Benjamin and Tia who had stayed silent so far, walked forward towards the nomads. "What they say it true," Benjamin said confidently. "And we are all asking. This is a battle that goes beyond the Volturi's jealousy of the Cullens. We must do what is right."

Peter glanced down at his tiny mate, exchanging a look I knew all too well. Do they sign their lives over on our request alone?

"We owe Jasper our lives, and I would be honored to fight by his side once again."

Plus two.

We parted ways as Peter and Charlotte headed back towards Astoria, promising to be on the look out for any other possible recruits.

We checked in regularly with Jake and Nessie, hoping our other family members were having better luck than we were. The worse news came from Jasper and Alice's travels in Mexico; Maria and her small coven who had visited us back in West Virginia had joined the Volturi. Not surprising, but it still put a pit in my stomach.

As luck would have it, only days before we were to return home, we came across Makenna and Charles, two of the nomads who had come to witness _against _us.

"We are no longer loyal to the Volturi after that incident," Charles said, the anger in his voice unmistakable. "It is unacceptable to abuse powers as they had, and if it wasn't for your mate, I am sure they would have taken your lives." Similar to Maggie, our friend in the Irish coven, Charles knew when someone was telling the truth, and believed our story immediately.

I had been promising Bella for years that it was her ability that stopped the Volturi, and I it was only recently that she began to believe it.

"We will stand with you," Makenna chimed in.

Two more eternal lives to be sent to a possible damnation.

We parted with them, sending Benjamin and Tia along, while we decided to take a short trip up the east coast in hopes of finding at least one more addition.

Once we reached Vermont, finding a plentiful number of moose. "I've never had moose before!" Bella said with a tinge of excitement. It sometimes rang odd to me still to hear her speak as a blood thirsty predator.

I allowed my instincts to take over as we sought out our meal. I let go of all of the horrors waiting in a near future. For an entire thirty minutes the only thing that existed was the hunter and the prey. I was not a son, or a father, or a husband. I was not brave, or powerful, or strong. I could not hear people's thoughts. I could not plan attacks that would condemn my family's fate. I sunk my teeth into the beast, who attempted one last loud bell call before it choked out. I could only fake it for so long though.

I sat against a tree trunk when I was done, my kill lying cold at my feet.

"Edward?" Bella came from behind several trees.

Looking up at her I wished I could read her thoughts before she said my name in that way.

"Do you think Jake is right? Do I wear my problem out there? Will it be my fault?"

I could not pick between my wife and the truth.

"Edward?" she repeated, vehemently this time.

"She will find out one day, Isabella," I said solemnly. "I don't think there is blame to be held onto any one person."

"No one could blame you--" she began to say but stopped herself.

"_Hmph." _It was my fault more than Jake's and Bella's combined. I was the one that left.

"Don't start," Bella said as if she could read my mind.

I heard the hissing from far off before the unfamiliar scents carried through the wind. Both Bella and I crouched defensively, but in the back of my mind I kept reminding myself that we _needed _allies.

Swift and agile as any vampire, four beings appeared from the woods. Two males and two females, all of tall stature with the same russet skin tone as Jacob's, only theirs was sheeted over with the chalky paleness, unique to our species.

"State your business," the one male said, his tone uninviting.

"Please, we come as friends. We mean you no harm." Bella said firmly.

The one woman scoffed. "Friends!"

"My name is Edward Cullen, and this is my wife, Bella. We've been traveling across the country to find help for our cause."

The second male pushed the woman behind him. "Cullen. I know that name. You had trouble with the Italians several years back, didn't you?" It was said more as a accusation than a question.

"We did, and that is why we seek help again. They are returning for us and our friends; this time they want our blood for no reason."

"They came to us," the first woman said, gesturing to the men to stand down. "They wanted us to witness for them, that you indeed had an immortal child. What was the result of that meeting?"

"The child was not immortal," I said, trying to curb the anger that was seething in my bones. "She was carried to term by my wife before she was changed. I am her biological father. She is now eighteen years old, and will remain that age."

"And the Volturi still want you dead? What have you done to upset them?"

"Could you at least tell us your names?" Bella asked.

"I am Kye," the first man, obviously their leader, said with his hand over his heart. "This is my mate, Chenoa." He glanced over at the other female who had not spoken yet.

"I am Aidan."

"Hazel," the second female followed. She was definitely not as timid as Chenoa, and her tenacity reminded me of Rosalie.

"Our only crime is that we stood up to the Volturi," I explained. "My wife has a great power; she is a shield that can deflect those of their twins. They had never been confronted with a fair fight before, and they retreated. We were afraid it was only due time before they would try again, and that time has come."

"And you know they are coming, how?"

"My sister, another member of our coven, has the power of precognition. The future is very clear to her."

"And how large is your coven?"

"Including our daughter their are nine of us. We already have several very powerful friends on our side as well."

"Are you Native America?" Bella asked randomly. She chastised Renesmee for inappropriate comments, yet she was no better.

Kye looked at her, amused with her bluntness. "Yes, yes we are. Iroquois from the Seneca nation. I'm surprised you noticed."

I could tell my brilliant wife was immediately putting them at ease. "My best friend is Quileute, from La Push, Washington. We are very close with their entire tribe."

"Vampires? Friends with humans?" Hazel looked at us suspiciously.

"We do not feed as you do, but stick to a diet of animals. It makes it easier for us to assimilate. We live among them, attend school, hold jobs."

"Interesting," Aidan said, putting his hand on Hazel's shoulder.

"The Quileutes are also rather special with their own...abilities. It's hard to explain, you would need to meet them." Bella was trying to appeal to their curiosity.

_They seem trust worthy. But to go against the Volturi? Would that be suicide?_

"I know it is a lot to ask," I said to Kye, picking his thoughts out of his head. "But do not think of it as suicide. We are not as helpless as the Volturi would lead others to believe."

"Edward, that's not polite," Bella corrected. "Sorry, he is a mind reader."

All four Seneca looked even more interested.

"I am sorry to say that we do not hold such powers as it seems your family does."

"Abilities are not necessary," Bella promised. "We need warriors on our side." She was now using their heritage to her advantage.

"Would we be able to talk among ourselves? I cannot promise a duty this great without speaking with my coven in private."

I nodded. "We are heading back west, but if you do decide to come, head towards Oregon. There will be a massive gathering; you will be able to track us easily."

Kye and Aidan shook my hand, but Hazel and Chenoa stood like statues. We had not gained _their _trust just yet.

I felt lighter on the trip home. I had spoken to Jake who had passed on the news of all of the covens agreeing to join us, as well as additions of others we had yet to meet. The Denali coven, Charles and Makenna, and Charlotte and Peter were our only guests, but the others would be joining us soon enough.

"Do you want to hear my plan yet?" Bella asked, taking me hand as we ran through the darkness.

"I think I'm ready for it."


	21. Crash Course: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Wow. Okay. This was a really really hard chapter to write--it was PAINFUL-- especially since I went and saw New Moon while in the middle of writing it. I'm sure PLENTY of people will disagree with me on the outcome, but this is my story and my opinion. There is no right or wrong answer.

Please note that instead of only two "sections" it goes Renesmee, Bella, Renesmee, Bella. I don't think I'll have to do this format again, but it was necessary for this chapter.

**Chapter 14 - Crash Course**

**Renesmee**

"Ramses!" I cried in my dream world as the stocky Egyptian vampire came into focus.

He was grinning from ear to ear and his laughter rang through the rafters of the odd building we were in. Had he donned a full grey beard and mustache, he could have passed for Santa Clause -- minus the red eyes, of course.

A part of mind took in where I was, which was definitely not Alexandria. It was a large room made entirely out of wood. Sparse furniture and a lack of any bed made me wonder if this is where Ramses lives. The rest of my mind though, was concentrating on telling him _everything._

_"I did it!"_ The words left my lips triumphantly, and I was jumping up and down, squealing like a little kid.

"I know, I know," he said, his voice lower. "And I am so very proud of you. You have helped to finish my life's work."

"We have friends and they are coming. They're all coming to help us! We're going to face the Volturi and defeat them! We will right? We'll win?"

"I know only what the prophet wrote."

"We'll win," I decided gravely. "The whole Queen thing is freaking my mom out a little. That Heaven and Hell bit is kind of weird too, but it sounds like we're going to win!"

He sat down in a rocking chair that was positioned in front of the fire place, which held no flame. I sat on the floor, my legs crossed, and began to talk a mile a minute about our entire trip.

"Alexandria is beautiful! It has changed so much since you were last there. You should go back one day!"

"Oh I will, child," he promised. "Once this is all over, I'll be able to return."

I chewed my lip, unsure if I should ask the question I had been lamenting over. "Ramses, are you hiding from them -- from the Volturi?"

"I am," he said solemnly.

"They'll kill you if they find you."

"They will."

I nodded. "Well, I won't let that happen, 'kay? You just let me know and we'll find you and protect you."

"All unnecessary, child, but thank you for your kindness."

I was wondered my tale of our trip would be construed as childish banter, but Ramses seemed deeply enthralled by it.

"I think it's about time you return to sleep," he said, once my story had reached it's conclusion.

"Will I see you again soon?"

He smiled like he was keeping a really good secret to himself. "You will see me soon, but I cannot promise when exactly."

That would suffice, I guess.

He chuckled and sent me straight into my dreams..

It was definitely a dream, because nothing short of reality could compare to Ramses' visions, but for some reason part of my conscious was questioning it still.

I wandered through a moss covered forest, climbing over fallen trees and narrowing missing low hanging branches. I wasn't looking for anything in particular, and was actually enjoying the calmness around me.

"Jake?" I saw him standing a few yards from me staring straight ahead, not even turning when I called his name.

It was my mother he was staring at. They stood, face to face, in complete and utter silence.

I walked towards them, but still not a single reaction from either side, as if they were stone likenesses. It make me so curious that I went and I touched Jake's skin and it was hot and soft, as always. But when I reached to touch my mother's, I pulled back in shocked, unprepared for what I felt: human skin, and not that of her vampire self. I looked into her eyes, still unmoving, and they were my eyes; rich chocolate brown.

"Are you human, Mom?" It was silly since I knew I was dreaming, and neither Dream-Jacob nor Dream-Bella seemed to have any interest in speaking to me.

This dream was confusing and boring, but no matter what I did, I couldn't wake myself up. I eventually sat down on a tree stump that wasn't even real and watched my mom and my boyfriend battle out in some strange staring contest.

"Bella?" my father's voice echoed in the distance. It was only then did her head turn towards the sound. "Bella, please, I love you."

Dream-Jacob's face frowned. "Bella, don't," he begged. "Please."

She looked back at him, and then in the direction she had heard my dad's voice. But before I could see her make a decision, the fringe of this fantasy world began to glow, and I was jolted awake.

Jake wasn't in bed with me, but with the door cracked opened, I was guessing his absence was what had woken me up.

"_Tell her!" _I could barely hear Jake's rasping whisper.

The only reply was one firm "No" in my mom's voice.

"Jake?" I called.

Within two seconds he was back in bed with me, but he seemed hesitant to even touch me.

"Tell her what?" I questioned, suspiciously.

"Audrey," he said smoothly -- a little _too _smoothly. "She keeps talking about the battle, and she really needs to be told she can't fight with us." He really didn't lie well at all.

He was sitting up, leaning against my headboard, his eyes popping out of their sockets. I wiggled my way under his arm and rested my head in his lap, but he did not pull me close as he usually does, instead just let his arm rest stiffly on my back.

"Honey, I really am wide awake. Why don't you sleep for a few more hours and I'll move some more of my things over from the apartment?" He sure knew how to keep me from protesting. I wanted all of his things here, with me, where they belong. He was already climbing out of bed, and tucking me back in before I gave my answer.

"Hmmmm, okay," I agreed, a little to late to matter.

"And Nay?" He sat on the side of the bed, brushing my hair from my face. "Happy birthday." He leaned over and kissed me softly.

I tried to pull him on top of me but he was firmly planted where he was. "Mmmm, how about you stay a little longer?" I suggested.

"Sleep, angel."

I turned to the alarm clock, four in the morning. "Fine." It wasn't long after he left that the red numbers went blurry and finally faded out.

The ruckus from the house was unmistakeable a few hours later. More guests had arrived.

I dressed and hurried to the living room, which was already quite crowded, to see Élisabeth and Gabriel being bombarded by my mom.

"Je suis si heureux de vous voir!" My mom broke out into her fluent French.

"Tu me manquais!" Élisabeth answered, her accent fluid and beautiful.

I wasn't even two steps into the room before Emmett picked me up and swung me around. "Happy birthday, Squirt!"

For the next hour I got a dozen congratulatory hugs. Audrey gave me a present, which I never felt comfortable with because she only had a part time job at a coffee shop.

"It's really nothing," she insisted. It was a silver frame with a picture of us from my Sweet Sixteen. Engraved on the bottom was only one word: _Sisters._

"No, Audrey," I took her into me and squeezed her tightly, "it's everything."

Esme had made enough food to feed everyone in the house, the only problem was only three of us even ate. By the time it was ready, Jake was back with a more boxes, so at least I knew whatever secret he was keeping, he wasn't lying when he said he was moving in.

Jacob was obviously uncomfortable being around so many "traditional" vampires, their crimson eyes giving away their recent activities, but he had worked with them once and just tried his best to stick near me and Audrey.

I wasn't much more interested in becoming friends with any of our visitors either. They still all looked at me as though I was some type of rare animal, and not one of them. They didn't treat Audrey much better either, especially since she smelled more human than I did.

I did enjoy Carmen's company though, as I had when I was a baby. The Denali resident had come to live with Tanya and her sisters, along with her mate Eleazar. Eleazar was a former member of the Volturi guard, and I believe this entire ordeal was harder on him than on the others.

"I cannot wait to get my hands on Jane this time," I heard Kate from across the room. Kate and Tanya seemed to both be looking forward to another confrontation since the death of their sister, Irina. She had been the one to go to the Volturi and claim I was an immortal child. When the Volturi learned she had been mistaken, they killed her right in front of all of us.

I feign memory loss for events such as those for my parents' sake.

"There will be time for revenge," Carmen patted the beautiful blonde's hand.

Garrett, the former nomad who had taken up life with the Denali Coven, kissed Kate's head. His long blonde hair fell next to hers and I realized they were almost exactly the same shade. "They will pay for what they've done."

"Hey," Jake said, pulling me onto his lap. "I'm stealing you away tonight, just so you know. Already cleared it with your parents. Don't make other plans."

I was about to probe deeper into what he meant, but Eleazar joined our conversation abruptly.

"Fascinating," the dark haired Spanish man said under his breath. "Your family never ceases to absolutely amaze me."

"What is it Eleazar?" My dad came over, obviously unhappy that my mom was involved with the planning that was going on across the room.

"Jacob here seems to -- I don't know -- it's just fascinating."

"What is it, mi amour?" Carmen asked.

"My gift allows me to see vampire abilities, as well as latent human abilities," he explained as he eyed both me and Jake up and down. "And it seems to be that you both share Renesmee's ability. See, no power manifests in the exact same way, so each has it's own fingerprint, if you will. Yours are identical. And _he's _not even a vampire!"

"Well, my power does go both ways with us. But only Jacob can send me his thoughts, no one else."

"Remarkable. This imprinting must go much farther into the depths than I ever expected."

I enjoyed that observation. We shared something so rare and special, that even a thousand year old vampire had never seen it before.

I eventually wandered out to the front yard with Audrey to watch Benjamin and Gabriel begin to test their abilities with the aid of Jasper and Peter.

"I'm not going to fight," Audrey said to me, leaning on the porch railing.

There wasn't really anything to say to that, since we were all thinking the same thing. "It's probably for the best," I encouraged.

"Are you going to fight?"

"I'm going to have to talk to my dad and Jake about it," I sighed.

"Great minds think alike," my dad said, walking out the door with Jacob. "And I'd like to compromise before shooting you down completely."

"Uh huh..."

"We're going to train you," Jake started. "Well, not us, but we're going to have others train you and see how you do against them. Then we'll decide."

"Mom would let me."

"I don't doubt that, she's turned into a regular Joan of Arc." Edward sounded bitter and annoyed. "But the two men that love you the most are asking this of you. Please?"

I could never argue against a rational point. "Fine, when do we start?"

My dad looked over at Jake, who had obviously thought something amusing because they both began laughing. "How about you have a non-violent birthday, and we'll start tomorrow?"

"Speaking of," Jacob smiled. "I have a few things to do regarding a certain birthday. Nay, meet me in the garage in an hour, 'kay?"

His devious planning was making me wary but I nodded.

"Fantastic." He kissed me quickly and ran off. I heard him calling for Esme somewhere in the house.

Time passed and Jacob was no where to be seen, so I did as I was told and went to the garage. There was no sign of him in there either, although his scent was strong. Balanced on the handle bar of my bike was a folded piece of paper:

_Catch me if you can._

I was hoping it wasn't some sort of scavenger hunt -- I wasn't wearing the right shoes -- but played along anyway. His scent wasn't hard to pick up, and I left the large crowded house behind me and followed him into the woods.

It was already dark out, but there were plenty of stars and a full moon to light the way. I picked up the pace the stronger Jake's scent got until I began to notice the white starlight being outshone by a orange glow behind the trees.

Set up in a small clearing was a white mesh canopy, the breeze of fall making it billow up around the edges. White candles were set out from tree-line to tree-line, their tiny flames combining to make the entire area light up brilliantly.

But no Jake.

I walked towards the canopy, and laid out across a large white sheet were small pieces of white and pink linen paper, each one marked with Jake's unique black scrawl.

I picked up the first one: _That you inspire me to be a better man._

I stood in the middle of the cabana and began to collect them: The way you twist your hair when you're thinking. Your confidence and strength. The way you blush. How you trace my palm with your fingers. The look in your eyes when you first wake up. Your smile after you say I love you. How you always laugh at my jokes. How I can be myself when I'm with you.

I knew he was there before I saw him, because my heart, which I swear was magnetically connected to his, skipped a beat in alert. In white linen pants and matching shirt, he stood barefoot at the entrance.

"I could have gone on forever," he said softly.

"What--what are these?" I was clutching the papers to my chest.

"Reasons why I love you, Renesmee."

"There must be hundreds of them..."

"I stopped counting after one fifty," he teased.

My eyes were brimming over with tears when he finally reached me. I threw my arms around his neck which were still holding his love letters.

When I reached up to his lips I could taste the salt water of my tears, and then realized he was crying too.

"I love you," I said against his mouth, unable to pull away for even a split second.

"I love you," he repeated.

We fell onto the soft white ground, and Jake whispered to me even more of his reasons. "I ran out of paper," he admitted. "Or else I'd have had to bring a dump truck with me to haul them up here."

My parents had allowed him a bottle of champagne, but I didn't care for the taste of it. I still held the delicate flute, copying Jake, and pretended to sip on it so I didn't hurt his feelings.

"I have one more thing for you."

"Jake, this," I waved dramatically at the set up, "is more than enough." I knew he had cut back his hours at the shop because of everything that had been going on. I wondered if that's another reason he was moving in.

"It's not much. Just something to keep the wolf company."

I tried to read his eyes as to what wolf he was referring to as he handed me the small black box, but he gave nothing away.

I was instantly confused. It was a little silver figure eight.

I pursed my lips, trying to figure out how to _not _sound stupid, but Jake was already laughing. He took the box and turned it 90 degrees.

"Oh!" I gasped. It was a charm for my bracelet, it was the infinity symbol.

He carefully took it from it's box and held up my wrist, the silver bracelet dangling from it. He attached it right next to the wolf that he had hand carved for me. My mom had one that matched.

"Infinity, eternity...same thing, right?" His eyes were so mature, but there was an eagerness of a boy there too.

"Yes," I breathed, and pulled him into a long kiss that we repeated over and over again.

My first yawn signaled Jake that it was time to go, although I begged to stay longer.

"If you want to start training tomorrow, you need to sleep." He got up and began to blow out the remaining candles that the evening wind hadn't extinguished yet.

"We can sleep here."

"Sure, that would go over well with your parents." Without giving me time for a come back he picked me up in his arms and took off back to the house.

We came in through the backyard, the room that opened up to Esme's garden. I could see to the side some of my family and our guests still practicing.

"We can still go back," I tempted.

Jake smiled and sighed. "What am I going to do with you?" Again, he didn't allow me time to answer and began to kiss me, and differently than he ever had before.

*******

**Bella**

Jake's presence in the living room was so abrupt that morning of Renesmee's birthday, it took me eight tenths of a second to wrap my mind around the words that were spitting from his mouth.

"We need to tell Renesmee. _Now._"

"Jacob..." Edward's velvet voice was calm and rational.

"Have you checked on her dream tonight, Edward? Because it's so subconsciously dead on it's not even funny."

I saw Edward's eyes wander towards Renesmee's bedroom and widen as he eavesdropped into her mind.

"See," Jake sneered. "We need to tell her _now._ I can't keep lying to her and now she can read _everything _I think."

"It's fine, Jake," I said, but my voice wavered giving away my lie. Edward always said I was a horrible liar.

"Sure, sure," he said cynically. "You keep telling yourself that. Do you even have a real reason for _not _telling her?"

Throughout the confrontation I had been conscious of the fact that we were surrounded by several other vampires, most of which had not the slightest clue about the vague conversation going on between a vampire and a werewolf.

"She's awake," Edward said quickly.

"_Tell her!_" Jake's voice lowered to a jarring whisper.

"No." I didn't know what else to say. I couldn't even answer the last question he had asked me, not even to myself.

"Jake?" Renesmee called from her room, forcing Jacob to flee back to her side.

I heard him come up with some weak lie about Audrey to cover up our actual conversation. I couldn't help but feel defeated every time I looked at Edward. He was not happy.

I retreated into my art studio to escape from the disapproving looks from my family, and critical eyes of our visitors. I knew Edward was following me and that I wouldn't like what he had to say.

"Jake left." His voice was still so calm and beautiful, even if his mood seemed otherwise. "He was too afraid to even lay with her, Bella. You are putting him in an impossible situation."

I picked up a blank canvas and balanced it on the easel. I never knew what I was going to paint until I started, and it always went with my mood. Not surprising that the first color to grace its threads was black.

"You are both making way too big a deal over this," I said, trying to keep my voice monotone.

Edward moved around to the back of the easel so he could see my face. His forehead creased as he studied me. "Then tell her."

I blinked away tears that didn't exist. It came down to the fact that I was terrified to even say it aloud, let alone have a civilized conversation about it to anyone, especially Renesmee.

The gapping hole in my chest that owned me for so long was burning suddenly; an old wound that hadn't even been caused by Jacob, but one that I correlated with the time in my life that I had gotten so close to him.

But this was now, and that was then. Wasn't that what I constantly told Edward? I should be able to just lay it out there for Renesmee. Shouldn't I?

I dropped the paintbrush on the side table, reaching for the hole but only finding my cold, dead chest.

"Why can't I do this?" I pleaded. I was looking at Edward, whose arms were around my waist now, but I wasn't speaking to him.

He must have known because he didn't reply. Instead, his hand reached my cheek and lead my face to meet his lips. Then his lips met my neck. My ear. My shoulder. We walked backwards towards the door and I heard the faintest "click" of the lock as he pulled me down to the floor.

Hours had flown by when we finally scrounged around for our clothes; we did have a tendency to lose track of time when we were alone.

I fixed myself so it hadn't look like I had been rolling around on the floor, using the reflection of the window. "How do you put up with this?" I asked, pointing at myself.

He gave me his heart melting crooked smile. "For how many decades will I need to repeat myself before you truly comprehend my words? Without this," he mimicked my gesture, "I would be nothing. I am because of you, Isabella Cullen. You are my raison d'être."

His reason for being.

"I love when you speak French," I said, pulling him in for another kiss.

"Thought I should practice..." He winked, but it took me a moment longer before I realized the hidden meaning.

I practically bulldozed people out of the way to reach the door where I jumped up and hugged Élisabeth and Gabriel. I quickly switched to French, so proud to show her how fluent I was.

"Happy birthday, Squirt!" I heard from behind us. Renesmee had come into the room and Emmett was tossing her around like a rag doll.

My baby was eight years old. Amazing.

Her birthday present was a trip with Alice to New York City to do some "real" shopping (opposed to what I guess is fake shopping we had in the Northwest) once everything calmed down. Not a single person questioned "what if" regarding the future planning of said trip. They were trying so hard to be optomistic. Edward relented and got her one of the new touch screen phones she wanted, mainly because all of the "kids" had them and he still was desperately trying to give her a normal life.

With Gabriel present we now had our two main offensive players, and Jasper called a meeting to set up how we would practice. Edward paced the entire conversation, except when I'd chime in at which time he'd sigh, until a look from his brother sent him to the other side of the room.

Where this would all take place was still unknown, but a field much like the one in Forks would probably be the only possible location. Jasper had agreed with my plan thus far:

Zafrina, who was currently on her way from the Amazon with her coven, would protect me, while I held my shield around our friends and family (something I was desperate to practice). That would immediately disable Jane, Alec, and any other mental power they had, like the vampire from Maria's coven. Emmett, Garrett, and the other fighters would go after Felix and especially Demetri. To give _any _remaining survivors a chance, Demetri would need to be taken out.

Jasper and Peter, the most agile and skilled fighters, would take out the new acquisition that can turn any physical energy used against into her own physical strength -- Eleazar called it kinetic absorption.

The ancients -- Aro, Cauis, and Marcus -- would be protected by Aro's personal shield, Renata, and we would save them for the end. They were nothing without their guard.

The topic of conversation at hand though was the little boy with telekinetic powers.

"Why don't we just have Gabriel freeze each of the guard as we take them out?" Garrett countered to Jasper's current plan.

"This boy is young; not quite a newborn, but still strong. Although his instincts will control him more so than a mature vampire, his ability will also be heightened," Eleazar explained. "He will easily be able to move entire cliffs if he can find the concentration." He was finished saying his piece and walked over towards Renesmee and Jacob, looking at them curiously.

"This is why we need Gabriel to focus on him and freeze anything he sends our way." Jasper took back over the conversation. "We'll also be working with Benjamin to practice upsetting fault lines and pulling in the elements to our advantage. One good quake on their side of the battle field _should _shake those who are untrained or newly changed."

"Where do the rest of us come in?" Charles asked, his red eyes so intense it was almost reassuring. The last time he stood on the other side, but not anymore.

"We have only matched our abilities up with their big players. The rest will be involved in hand to hand combat."

"And let's not forget the wolves," I added.

"Yes," Jasper said carefully as the nervous energy rose in the room. "Everyone will be paired up with a shape-shifter," he spoke through the grumbles of resistance. "The pack psyche is another one of our best offenses. There are two packs now, but Jacob and Sam can communicate. That means two minds will be able to be twenty places at once. It is something that even if the Volturi know, they can't change it."

The bellyaching didn't stop. Charles, Mackenna, and even Peter were wary about the Quileutes still.

"This is their battle as much as it is ours," I said firmly. "If you cannot work with them, then you aren't going to be of any use here."

The words leaving my mouth even startled me -- I was literally giving any of them an out. Yet no one said a word more on the topic as we went into the yard to practice with Benjamin and Gabriel.

A part of me was at all times conscious of Edward and Renesmee. Although momentarily I was focusing on Gabriel freeze boulders that Emmett was throwing at him, I was well aware that my husband and daughter were standing on the porch above me.

"Speaking of," I caught the tail end of Jake's sentence. "I have a few things to do regarding a certain birthday. Nay, meet me in the garage in an hour, 'kay?"

Jacob had made sure to get our permission before setting up this romantic rendez-vous with Nessie. Well, actually he asked Edward, even though I was in the room also. Our interactions after our first encounter were tense and forced, and now after this morning, we weren't even making eye contact. I found myself constantly shaking my head in failed attempts to relieve the burning that flared up every time I thought about it.

_*******_

Edward heard their thoughts as they came back from their date well before I could smell or hear them. We were all busy in the yard, perfecting Gabriel's ability, but when they finally did come within range, I went into house to just _happen _to be there when they got in. They weren't in the front of the house as I expected them to be, so I wandered to the end of the long hallway to the back room which led to both Esme's garden and the side yard I had just be in.

The way he was kissing her made that burning come back with a vengeance, but why I couldn't place it. I was swimming in humanity, fighting through memories that were pulling and pushing me in all directions. I wasn't even looking at them anymore, really. I would get close to the muddy memories I was trying to hard to find, but the second the burning hole appeared I retreated back into reality.

And at that moment, reality was my daughter's eyes staring at me wide... and knowing.

*******

**Renesmee**

I heard her footsteps but I was lost in the wonder of Jacob's kisses and couldn't bring myself to pull away from him. When I finally did, my mom was there leaning against the door frame with _the look. _ Yes, she was looking at us, but her eyes were washed over like she was reliving something. Like she was searching for something that had already happened.

And then the floodgates opened.

_...the reason for my existence..._

I had heard someone use that word before. My dad. My dad called my mom his existence.

_...now you're just going to have to deal with the consequences of that choice -- me. _

What choice? _The_ choice.

_There was one girl, but she wasn't right...it was the wrong kind of love._

Who else would Jake ever be close to that I would have never met? I _have _met her.

_In the absence of someone, sometimes you have to rely on others..._

There was only one person who had been there for my mom when my dad left. Only one.

_My _mother's _reflection in the mirror._

The dreams...they were memories. His memories.

She wasn't right because she loved someone else.

She fell in love with him while Edward was gone.

Stories of the past started to rattle in my brain. The dark times when my parents weren't together, when Jacob saved her and when they became best friends. Then they fought to bring the werewolves and vampires together after my dad returned.

Best friends.

I looked up at Jacob, his eyes were fixated on her with an expression I could not completely read, but he seemed _angry_. Maybe furious would be a better word. Like someone had just betrayed his trust and told his darkest secret.

Best friends?

It was all crashing like waves against the rocks at First Beach. Memories I didn't have but ones my mind was now piecing together flashed in front of my eyes. They had both loved before. They had told me. Truthfully.

_I told him I probably wouldn't think she's good enough for him. I wondered how jealous I would be._

_I picked Edward._

My mom's eyes were on me now but her expression remained the same.

"Renesmee," Jacob whispered, jolting me out of the nightmare that had come to life. He had been watching my visions the entire sixty seconds it took me to run through them.

"Your other lo--" my tongue wasn't forming words as I looked back and forth between them. My heart wasn't breaking, but it was being crushed. "Your other loves. You and you!" I jumped back from Jake's arms, shaking at the reality falling down around me. "You were in love!" Tears of pure confusion were burning my eyes, and my throat was choking on the words I could only think and not say. I wanted them to start denying it. I wanted Jake to take me in his arms and tell me the girl's real name. That she wasn't my mother. But I didn't get to hear any of that.

"Nessie, it's not like that," my mom crooned. "Please, let's just talk about this."

"Uh, wow. No. No, we're not going to talk about this." I was backing away from them about to make a run for the garden door but instead I turned face first into my father's cold body. I started pounding on his chest screaming at him. "Why did you leave her? This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't left her!"

The small part of my sanity which I still held on to in the very back of my mind knew this wasn't his fault, or my mom's, or Jake's. But the insane trumped the sane right then and I cried. The next thing I knew I was in his arms and he sat on a wicker bench with me in his lap like when I was little. I sobbed into his shirt, hiding in the darkness behind my eyes for a long time. I knew Bella and Jake had left the room, I knew it was evening when I heard Carlisle come through the front door. Inaudible whispers came from the living room, but I couldn't make out words, only voices. I heard Jacob's tone and although I felt broken, my heart still swelled in response.

"How can you..." I stared into space now. I couldn't look at him, I couldn't even say the words aloud, but I knew he could see what I was thinking anyway.

"How can I love your mom after what happened? How could I stand Jacob being around afterwards?" His voice sounded hurt, but not by me. "You were right, it was my fault. I made a mistake. And do you know what? That mistake still haunts me. I wasn't there to see her, but Jake was--," I cringed at his name but he ignored it and continued, "--and he's shown me. I've seen what Sam saw the day he found her collapsed in the woods after I told her--" His voice was cracking now, his perfect composure was shattered. "I told her that she wasn't good for me. I told your mother--" and he couldn't go any further. I don't think I'd ever know what else he said. "I plan on being with Bella for an eternity which is how long I will blame myself for what I did to her." I always loved the way he said her name; as if she was an angel sent straight from Heaven for him and only him.

He pulled me up so I was no longer cradled like a baby but sitting upright on is lap. I know it may seem very awkward for someone looking at us because we were technically the same age, but he's the only father I'd ever known. I didn't know any other way.

"What am I going to do?"

"You are going to love Jacob," he said, but it sounded more like an order. "Do not let him go. Do not let something that happened over a decade ago, regardless of who it involves or what the circumstances were, change anything." He turned me so we were looking at each other eye to eye.

_They still love each other_, I thought.

"But not the way she loves me. Not in the way he loves you."

"Okay, enough talking about love with my father." I pulled myself up off of the couch. "I'm going to just think for a while, 'kay?" He leaned down and kissed the top of my head, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The look in my mom's eyes this past year time wasn't about what was _there, _but that something wasn't. Jake wasn't there anymore.

I could feel the bile rise my throat the longer I thought of it. They kissed. They _loved _each other. They could have been together.

Everyone had kept this secret from me, but for some reason I blamed her more than the rest. She was my _mother. _Jake had moved on and stuck around even after she not only married my dad, but while she was pregnant with me. My dad had moved on, although he still obviously can't forgive himself for leaving her, allowing Jake to be with me and love him. He allowed him to stay a part of our family. My mom was the only one that seemed to still be in limbo.

I curled up on the bench, albeit uncomfortable, clutching a throw pillow and burying my head in the cushion.

"Maybe I could talk to her?" I heard Audrey offer from the living room.

The pain in my mom's voice was excruciating. "No words will help her right now."

I could tell Jake's pacing footsteps over the others, his mumbling barely about a whisper. "I should go in there. I have to say something."

"Just give her time, son," my dad said.

Son. Jake had told me _they _were his best friends. The respect I had for both him and my father grew ten times once I realized what they had endured all those years ago.

The emotional exhaustion caught up to me, but every time I would fall asleep replays of my dreams -- of Jake's memories -- would come back to haunt me. Twice I had to race to the trash can to throw up.

It was just dawn when I opened my eyes. Sometime during the night my subconscious had silence itself long enough for me to sleep dreamlessly. I saw Jake sitting on a trunk that was pressed up against the wall, his arms crossed in front of him and his legs kicked out far in front. He was sleeping too. That couldn't be comfortable.

I studied him for a while. I realized that it wasn't making me sick to think about him as it was last night. He was still the same Jacob I was in love with eight hours ago before the world as I knew it crashed.

He opened his eyes and went to speak, but I raised my hand to stop him.

"There isn't anything you can say right now," I said more harshly than I had meant to.

"Can't I say I'm sorry?"

"You could have told me."

"I promised..." he began, but his voice wavered off.

I laughed sarcastically. "She made you promise, didn't she?"

He lowered his eyes to the floor and didn't reply.

"Knew it."

I sat up and stretched. A tiny jingle came from above me, and I looked up to see my bracelet.

The wolf.

The one my mom had.

"Seriously?" I hissed. All the emotions from last night were back in full force. I was shaking my wrist in front of him. "So is this what you give all of the girls you fall in love with?"

He was speechless. My mom and dad were at the door, horror colored both of their faces.

With one easy tug the bracelet, wolf, and infinity charm split apart and showered down on the room.

"Audrey!" I yelled. My best friend showed up behind my parents and pushed her way through. Without asking she followed me out the back door towards the garden and took off into the woods. I heard Jake outside calling my name, but I couldn't stop. I wasn't sure when I'd stop.

"Nessie. I can't. Run like. You." I slowed down for Audrey to catch up. Okay, so maybe I'd have to stop.

*******

**Bella**

The desperation in his voice was absolutely painful as he called after Renesmee.

"Please, Nay! Renesmee, please! I love you!"

I followed him outside, passed Esme's flowers and into the side yard. The way he turned towards me made my spine crawl.

It was Jake's eyes that made me nervous. I could see his teeth clenched and his breathing rough and labored.

"Ja--"

"Don't." He was glaring at me. It took a quarter of a second to fight through the fog of my human memories, but I connected that tone to something I recalled from a long time ago. The time when he first became a werewolf. When being easily angered could have cost me my life.

I couldn't think of anything to say regardless. Fragments of emotions bounced around as words in my mind, which, although was filled with so much knowledge, felt so empty.

"Don't turn this all on me," I huffed.

"On you?" Jake's laugh was dark and angry. "This is the one thing you'll _never _take responsibility for, isn't it?"

"I have apologized to you for the past eight years! What else would you want from me?"

"I'm taking about _this _right _now,_" he said through his teeth, "and not a lifetime worth of apologies! Whatever happens because of this is your responsibility, because for all of your talk about moving on, you so do _not _mean it."

I wanted to cry. "Of course I mean it!"

"Then why can't you let it go?" He was talking with his teeth clamped shut still, as if upon opening his jaw the world may end -- or he'd turn into a giant wolf -- whichever came first.

"I have Edward, and you have Renesmee and this is how it's suppose to be!"

"That isn't what I asked."

He cautiously backed away from me, his face and arm giving off little twitches. "Give it up Jasper," he hissed. He was fighting Jasper's gift. I was very aware of the hidden eyes that came from the house.

I knew Edward was close by, but I quickly realized that this was most likely something he would not get in between, unless it turned violent.

"You chose him! You looked me in the eyes and _still _chose him over me! And so what did I do? I punished myself for loving you. I stuck by you and your family anyway. And then I was rewarded by _her._

"The funniest thing is that all this time I have never understood what you and Edward have, yet I have learned to accept it and most of all, respect it. But I know what I have with her. I wanted to let her know everything, but _you...you..._I don't even know what to say!" He was trembling now and it had nothing to do with the cold winter air. I could see the pulsing up his spine and the tiny hairs on his arms standing on edge, waiting to phase.

"Were you too scared? Too scared to have to admit those things out loud yet again? You wanted to keep them bottled up behind you so badly, but that is _selfish, _Bella. It's been over eight _years, _but no, you just could not even admit it to your own daughter. She would have understood if we had told her the right way! I don't know if it's the choice itself or the fact you had to make one to begin with...but it _haunts you. _It's in your eyes. It's in your words. You don't need to be a genius to figure it out. So now I'm yet again being punished by _your choice. _I respected your wishes and didn't tell her because you're my best friend and I trusted your judgement. But Bella, I swear, if I lose her, I will _never _forgive you."

The hole in my chest was getting bigger, and I couldn't escape, memories were cascading out...

_He was my best friend. I would always love him, and it would never, ever be enough. _

_Kiss me, Jacob. Kiss me, and then come back._

They fell through the hole that was exposed for everyone to see. I was bleeding out. I could feel the ghost of my human pulse beating out iron and rust.

_Jacob was right. He'd been right all along. He was more than just my friend. That's why it was so impossible to tell him goodbye — because I was in love with him. Too. I loved him, much more than I should, and yet, still nowhere near enough. I was in love with him, but it was not enough to change anything; it was only enough to hurt us both more. To hurt him worse than I ever had._

And then one very last one...

_Two futures, two soul mates… too much for any one person._

Jake wasn't the only one outside with us anymore; I could smell Nessie and Audrey. I'm sure he knew, but obviously didn't care what she heard.

"Everyone else has been over it for a _long _time, except for you. Are you still throwing yourself a little pity party?"

My jaw opened and closed mechanically, but no sound escaped. I didn't have an explnation for him. For Renesmee. For Edward.

Snow was beginning to fall. Unseasonably early for September, but still it fell, turning to frost once they hit my stone skin, yet sizzling when they would land on Jacob.

It was in this moment of deafening silence, with only the faint patters of the flakes falling to the ground, that I did something I had never had the courage to do before: I reached into the hole. Not when Edward left, not when he returned, not when I realized I loved them both. I had been afraid of it, I had cried over it, but I had never faced it dead on... and when I did only one thing came out.

_"But you know that, right? That I would never, ever hurt you?"_

But he hadn't hurt me. It couldn't be what this is about. I had made a choice and Renesmee was the result of that choice. And when it came to her, Jake didn't have a choice in that matter at all.

Even though I normally had very quick reasoning skills, much more time had gone by than I had realized; there was a soft grey film of snow already on the ground. Jake was still trembling, and still horribly upset.

"Jake?" I could pick her soprano voice from a crowd of a million. "Can we talk?"

I begged myself not to look at her, but I did anyway, and the little bit of self control was drained from me when I met her cold stare.

Jake glanced at me once more, and then his eyes up to the porch where I figured by now Edward was standing, and ran off to the woods to follow her.

I closed my eyes and fell to my knees in the snowy, wet, ground, searching for anything I may have had left in me.

"Bella?" Edward's velvet voice was behind me. "Let's get you inside."

I shook my head.

"Bella, please," he begged.

This time I couldn't even manage a gesture, and he left me where I had fallen from grace. I needed to figure out where this all went wrong, and I couldn't do that with him near me.

The best present I had on my wedding night was seeing Jake -- before we got into a fight of course. Then he was back to protect me and Renesmee while I was pregnant. The pull between us was not _ours, _but even after she was born and I feared we may lose to the Volturi, I was prepared to give her to Jacob. Those first years of her life were amazing because it was how it should have always been with me and Jake.

And then they grew feelings for each other. Then I had to share him--

The gapping hole was burning again, and I clutched my chest. My instinct to retreat from it was strong, but I forced myself through it.

_I'd thought Jake had been healing the hole in me -- or at least plugging it up, keeping it from hurting me so much. I'd been wrong. He'd just been carving out his own hole, so that I was now riddled through like Swiss cheese. I wondered why I didn't crumble into pieces._

My shield was down and I could feel my husband's presence not far from me.

"Yes," he answered to my memory, but it sounded more like the wind.

"Why couldn't you just tell me if you knew why I felt this way?"

I rose from the earth and at the same time Edward was suddenly in front of me.

"I tried." His hands were cradling my face, his thumb brushing down my cheek bone.

He had, in the plane ride back from Alexandria, but it hadn't even registered a fraction. I had been completely in denial.

"I guess that isn't just something you can ask for back, huh?"

Edward gave me a critical eye. "Be honest now, would you really want it back?"

"Well," I said pouting. "It's not his anymore."

Edward's crooked smile weaseled its way through his stern expression. "Yes, Bella, it is."

I wanted to argue my point -- Edward was the love of my entire existence and no one but him should ever, or will ever have my heart or any other part of me -- but he was already kissing me. He seemed content with this revelation, but it wouldn't be good enough for our daughter.

I tried to close my eyes and enjoy Edward's lips on mine, but whenever I did I only saw the icy look Renesmee shot me before running off with Jacob.

It wasn't going to be a good enough answer for her at all.

------------

And there it is. Bella's body was broken into so many pieces and she was near death when she was changed, but there was one thing even immortality couldn't heal. Edward understood, because isn't that what he does? Our all knowing, incredibly insightful favorite vampire always knows these things. She only saw that burning hole as something left by Edward, when in fact Jacob had left one as well.

Side note: The French translation between Elisabeth and Bella is "I'm so happy to see you" and "I've missed you"


	22. Coming and Going: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **This was another chapter that was difficult to put into words -- especially the last part. You may want tissues, or maybe I'm just a huge sap lol. I hope everyone understands why a blow out last chapter was necessary, and that they can see the healing, albeit slowly, that is on its way.

**Chapter 15 - Coming and Going**

**Renesmee**

I tried to think of adjectives to describe the emotions that contorted Jake's every move, but I couldn't.

I could see the seething, raw anger that was causing the pulse-like twitches go up and down his spine. In my eight years I had never once questioned his control over phasing, and although I wasn't scared, the fact that he was so far gone made the pit that had taken over my stomach grow.

Then there was his face that looked to be twisted up in pain, betrayal, and fear. Pain because I was in pain, and we shared everything. Betrayal because whatever was really going on with my mom -- the thought of her made me want to throw up -- went deeper than I knew, and the fear...well he looked scared to death but I couldn't imagine why.

Finally though, somewhere in the corner of his deep brown eyes I saw the slightest glimmer of love when the sun managed its ways through the trees. He loved _me._

We had been walking quite a ways in uncomfortable silence until I realized we were back in the tiny clearing, the canopy the only proof that last night -- the amazing, wonderful part -- ever happened.

He stood next to it, his back towards me, the wind blowing the mesh around him, contrasting his dark skin.

"I'm... I'm so..." He attempted to speak but it came out in failed whisperers. I cringed hearing the torture in his voice. "I will never be able make it up to you...and...I understand if...you want me to go..."

The blood drained from my face.

"Go?" I said alarmed.

He turned around and I saw why his sentences were so weak. He was crying.

"Because what I did -- keeping something like that from you -- it's unforgivable, Nay. But, I can't change the past...and I won't pretend. I can tell you I'm sorry for keeping the secret, but I can't take back the rest."

Translation: He use to love her and isn't going to try to deny it to win me back.

"All I've ever asked for was the truth," I said, but it didn't come out as confidently as I had thought it through in my head.

"I know." He looked down at the ground, his huge frame broken and beaten. "I know you better than anyone, I should have just -- done it. So...Sam and Seth...they're on their way here...talk about the battle...I can...go back with them..."

"Why do you keep saying that?" I said, stomping my foot. "Why would you leave me?"

He blinked, forcing a few last fat tears down his red, puffy, cheeks. I wished I could have cried with him, but I had cried it all out last night and again with Audrey that morning.

"Why would you want me to stay?" he challenged.

I frowned and furrowed my brows, not understanding for the life of me where his rationale was coming from. Then I remembered the fear. He was afraid he was losing me.

"Because... I love you, Jake."

"Even after what I did?"

I sighed. "Yes. That doesn't make everything fine, but yes. It just doesn't turn off...what we have." I knew it _couldn't _turn off for him.

"It's as much my fault, and Edward's fault, as it is hers. None of us told you." He knew I was blaming Bella the most.

"She's my mother." That held no explanations whatsoever, and I could tell by Jake's look that it wasn't a good reason.

"You're mad at her," I pointed out.

Immediately, I saw the pulsing come back. He took a deep breath and slowed his breathing down. "Not the same. At all."

I hadn't even noticed how close we were getting to each other. Our undeniable magnetic pull was so deep in our subconscious that it was an automatic response. He reached out, his warm hand carefully brushing down my arm. I shivered and the pit in my stomach felt like it was going to up back up my throat.

I stepped back, and that was a slap in his face.

"Just...not...yet..." I was ashamed.

He stepped forward again, taking me in his arms against my will. I got flashes of my dreams -- of his memories -- and managed to free myself before running to the trees and throwing up.

"Please, Jake." I had my head leaned against a tree, the bark not the most comfortable head rest.

I felt him behind me for a few minutes longer, and then he left silently like the hunter he was. I pushed my head into the trunk as hard as I could, wanting the pain to come from somewhere other than inside of me, but my impermeable skin wouldn't allow it.

I wasn't familiar with the area I was in, and didn't know what other trails intersected nearby, but the sweet scent of human blood barreled towards me. I hadn't hunted in a very long time and the flavor -- memories of my infancy -- made my mouth salivate.

I heard the faintest crackle in the leaves behind the tree and looked down to see a very brave little grey rabbit hopping feet from me.

"You shouldn't be here," I said to the animal. "I'm a monster, you know," I stopped, thoughtfully, "although, you probably taste awful. No offense."

Talking to little tiny animals was probably not a good sign.

The bunny took one brave hop towards me, and scrunched his noise in the air, his body freezing when he realized the alarming scent was coming from me. He looked at me with one eye and then darted off into silent forest.

"Told you so," I muttered, punching the tree as hard as I could. It shook furiously, leaves and branches raining down around me. The trunk snapped like a twig and it began to fall forward, landing right on the canopy.

I was so pleased with myself, I hadn't immediately noticed the strengthening human scent, or the commotion humans make by just simply walking in a straight line.

That all changed when a body impacted against mine and I fell onto the ground.

I sprang to my feet in a defensive hiss, my body crouched so low, my finger tips were brushing the grass and dirt.

"Are you alright?" asked a frantic voice. The red haze of instinct left my eyes and I fixated on a man, maybe in his mid-twenties, in woodsman's clothing. An oversized hiker's backpack was left haphazardly a few yards away.

"I _was _fine until you assaulted me."

I saw him stop and take me in before replying. _Yeah, yeah, I'm pretty/gorgeous/beautiful. Blah blah blah. Speak already!_

"Normally," he said still composing himself, "young women such as yourself don't fair too well in these...conditions."

I scoffed. "These are _my _woods. I've lived around woods my entire life." Suddenly the wind blew his scent in my direction -- so delicious that the red haze came back -- and I realized what was also not far from here: several blood-thirsty vampires with much less self control than myself. "You really should leave this area."

"Why?" he asked, grinning.

"Well, it's our land," I lied. "And besides that, there was a rare wolf sighting nearby. Hiking alone is a dumb to begin with."

"You're feisty. I'm Adam, by the way." He smiled again and I only shook my head.

"_Adam_, you need to leave this area, or I'm going to call a ranger."

"You're here alone."

"_I live here_," I emphasized again. "I know this forest better than you know your own backyard."

"What's your name?"

Only a moment had passed by before I picked up a familiar scent, and I had to fight not to smile.

"Renesmee?" said a booming voice. The human's face dropped.

Emmett came trampling through the trees, purposely creating a ruckus and a path of destruction.

"Hi, Emmett!"

"Who's your friend?"

Adam had enough common sense to take a step back from where he was. His natural adversity towards Emmett -- towards vampires -- over took his arrogance.

"Just a lost hiker. Told him he should go -- with the wolf sighting and all."

"Yeah," the human said with a shaky breath. "Thanks for the...warning..."

We waited a minute, until the rustling of leaves was far enough away to talk in low voices.

"What'd you do to the poor tree?" Emmett teased.

"I was mad," I glared, stopping to debate whether I should interrogate everyone. "Hey Emmett, did you know?"

He didn't have to ask what I was referring to. "Eh, kind of. I heard their arguments and all, but I never knew the details. It was between your parents and Jacob. None of my business."

"Did Alice see me here?" We had already began to walk back towards the house.

"Yeah. Edward was pissed because you two walked too far away to hear your thoughts, and then you were with Jake and Alice can't see either of you...but then Jake ran off and..."

"I got it Emmett. Wait, Jake ran off?"

"Didn't come back to the house." He shrugged, unworried.

I frowned. "I hurt his feelings."

"He hurt yours."

One thing I loved about Emmett was he was so no nonsense. His entire world was very black and white; something everyone envied.

I wasn't looking forward to going into the house, but Emmett gave me no choice. He said he needed me as proof to his human scaring skills.

Our guests for the most part avoided my eye contact. I didn't know where my mom was, but I couldn't bare to ask since the sole reason for asking would to avoid her like the plague.

"You need to hunt," Jasper whispered to me. My eyes didn't give away my thirst like everyone else's, but I'm sure he could feel my mood, especially after I was in such close proximity to the human.

"Are you going to teach me to fight?"

"If you hunt."

I snorted.

"Come on, I'll go with you."

This took me by surprise. I loved my entire family, but Jasper and I were never even remotely close. I don't think I had ever been in a one on one conversation with him -- ever.

He must have already mentioned this to Edward and Alice, because no one said a word as we exited the house. I followed him east towards the mountain range, dancing through what was left of the daylight. It had already become very obvious Jasper wanted to talk to me about something, and it wasn't anything he wanted to be overheard, even though we were a hundred miles away by the time we came across the scent of grizzly bears and split up to hunt. A hundred miles was a bit of an overkill.

My mind was much more clear after I was full, the red no longer eating away at my vision.

"Better?" Jasper asked.

"Much. Thanks for forcing me to come."

He nodded and we just stood there next to the fallen beast he had just fed from.

"You have something to say to me?" I finally asked.

"Yeah, let's head back and I'll explain on the way."

We had gone pretty far, the silence eating away at my patience, before Jasper spoke again.

"You know how Edward always feels like he violates everyone's privacy? Because he can read their minds?"

I nodded, thankful the conversation was finally starting.

"I feel the same way quite often... and emotions can be much more personal than thoughts. Your mother for example," --I cringed-- "is immune to Edward's ability, but even if he could, he wouldn't have been able to pick out the truth in this...situation. The mind can so easily be in denial, but see, emotions cannot lie. She has been confused for quite sometime, Nessie."

"She could have told me."

"Yes, but I don't believe she understood herself enough. I still don't believe she understands now."

"Are you trying to get her off the hook or something?" I asked, annoyed.

"No, but let me make my point," he said. "For vampires, emotions do not rule us as they do for humans, it is more about our instincts, but Bella brought a great deal of her humanity into her immortal life."

"Okay..." I had heard all of this before.

"That said, I also want to share something I never speak about. I don't believe I've even slipped up in front of Edward. Like I said, I feel as though I violate everyone around me, being able to read so much."

The sun was gone now, and the moon was behind a thing layer of clouds. When Jasper looked up at it, the obvious criss-crossed scars of his past became much more prominent.

"The triangle between your parents and Jake was something very difficult for me to handle, although I never would admit it -- not even to Alice. You won't want to hear this, but Bella and Jacob did love each other. I felt it."

I didn't know why Jasper was telling me this. I wondered if I could possibly pass out from the heartbreak those words were causing.

"But see, Nessie, that's all it was. They loved each other the way two humans do. Had this been a different world, one void of mystery and magic, they could have been together. Married, had a family, etcetera.

"But it's not that world. The absolute devotion and love I have always felt between Bella and Edward is only rivaled by what I feel for Alice."

The thin gangly rivers we had been following were now feeding into the Columbia River, signally our close proximity to home.

"Then you were born and Jake imprinted on you. The bond formed was something unbelievable to me. Edward had tried to explain the imprint after seeing it between Emily and Sam, but I had no idea until I saw it for myself. It left me in a state of awe.

"When the two of you finally admitted your feelings to each other, it changed again. I can practically see it, as if the bond is a tangible, physical thing. If I'm standing in between you, I can _feel _it pierce me just to connect you again."

I only sighed at the obvious facts he'd had stated so far.

"My point in all of this is that there is love, but then there is what you have with Jake, what your parents have between each other, what I have with Alice. _Especially_, with what you have with Jake. Edward would not like to hear this, but although he likes to believe he loves Bella 'more than anyone has loved someone in the history of the world'," he said, mocking my dad's voice, "he can't _see _or _feel _what I can between you and Jake."

The lights of Astoria were in view, and we veered away from civilization and towards home.

"Remember, Nessie, I am much more attuned to all the types of love there are. Your mother has been confused because humanity makes all these feelings fuzzy. The heart _always_ knows the answer, but the mind just gets in the way."

We were silent the last few miles, giving me time to think. Then I stopped thinking, taking into consideration what Jasper had filled my head with. My feet picked up pace as I let my heart have its way, Jasper keeping up with me and not questioning my sudden urgency that I knew he felt.

We slowed outside the house, my uncle's eyes narrowing.

"Tension is very annoying," he muttered. "It's like Chinese water torture; consistent and annoying."

There were many new scents coming from the house, and even I felt the thickness of the tension as we jumped through the window.

"Seth! Sam!" I ran over and jumped on Seth, his reflexes catching me. He didn't laugh and just placed me on the ground, his eyes not moving from straight ahead. He and Sam were both pulsing, just like Jake was earlier in the day.

My mom stood on the other side of Sam, her eyes never falling towards me. I looked down the line next to her and saw my dad and Jake standing in front of my mom, Élisabeth, Tia, Alice, Audrey, and Esme. Jake. My heart fluttered.

Only then did I turn and realize what had happened.

"Argh," I groaned, pulling at my hair, looking at the opposite side of the room. The Denali coven, along with Makenna, and Charlotte, were standing in the middle of the expansive room next to Carlisle and Rosalie, all of their arms extended in defense.

"It's about time," Emmett growled. He and Garrett were restraining a vampire I didn't know. Next to them the same were repeated: Benjamin and Gabriel, Charles and Peter. They all holding unfamiliar, hissing vampires.

A tingle of calm fell over me, and I rolled my eyes in Jasper's direction. The vampires relaxed too, and with a nod from Edward, the men released the strangers.

"What happened?" I shrieked, realizing the fretful look on Esme's face and then the destruction of her living room.

"Just a misunderstanding," my dad said coolly.

I got no other explanation until later that night when I was in my room with Audrey.

"The new vampires are Theo, Wes, and Elliott. I dunno which is which though," she said, excitement in her voice. "They know Jasper from I guess a long time ago. One of them knows...Peter? I think Peter." They must have been from the days of the newborn armies -- some of the very few surviving "soldiers" that wreaked havoc on the south.

"Jake had been outside for a while, so Alice didn't know that Seth and Sam were on their way, because she couldn't see anything to begin with, you know? When Sam and Seth got here, they came from the opposite side of the house and Jake never saw them. The new vampires -- you know, we really are going to need to categorize them better -- don't know werewolves...or shapeshifters...whatever. And Sam and Seth didn't realize they were new and walked right in and all hell broke loose. Your mom _flipped out_ when the one really tall vampire was inches from Jake's neck. So she attacked the tall one and that freaked the newbies out even more. It felt like an hour, but it was over in seconds." Audrey hadn't taken a breath the entire time and she exhaled and gasped for air before finishing the story. "Thank God you and Jasper showed up when you did. I guess we take Jasper's ability for granted."

I nodded.

"Want to talk about anything?" she prodded.

I shook my head. "Jasper's going to start training me tomorrow, so I need to get to sleep."

"Oh okay, well I'm here. Always."

I managed a smile for her. "I know. Goodnight, Auds."

"'Night."

I fell asleep quickly, but as I was expecting, it wasn't long before Jake's memories, and the stories I had been told, all much more clear now that they were _real_, woke me up in a cold sweat. It was the last image of them kissing that did me in. It wasn't even the kiss I had seen when I -- _when my mom _-- punched him, but one my own mind had fabricated for my nightmares.

I laid there panting for a while, listening for the comforting voices in the living room. I heard my dad and Carlisle speaking to Sam, whose voice always radiated such confidence. My mom's voice chimed it, making a sense of dread rising in my throat. Then I heard Jake, and the tune of their voices together was sending me over the edge again.

_The heart has always known the answer, but the mind just gets in the way. _Jasper's quiet voice came into my head. _There is love, but then there is what you have with Jake._

I closed my eyes and pushed everything else out of my head and concentrated on my chest.

Before I knew it, I was getting out of bed and walking down the hall. I headed into the huge living room, filled wall to wall with vampires -- all eyes on me.

I continued to walk, and without breaking the trance I had allowed to take over my body, I stopped at the oversized arm chair Jake was in, climbed into his lap and curled myself against his chest.

He was rigid at first, and his breathing short, but I sighed and pulled myself closer to him. He slowly wrapped his great big arms around me and everything that had been rattling around in my brain disappeared.

I knew the entire room was probably staring at us, but I didn't care at all. I looked up only once and saw Jasper sitting on the stairs. He winked at me, and I managed a smile back. Never in a hundred years -- literally -- did I think I would get a pep talk from Jasper.

I closed my eyes and inhaled Jake's scent and he leaned down and pressed his face into my hair.

_Nay, I love you. I love you so much and--_

_Shhh, I know. I love you too._

_What about Bella?_

_I don't want to talk about that right now._

_Renesmee..._

_Not now. I just--it's different. Okay?_

We both dropped it and I fell asleep in his arms, listening to growing plans between the vampires and wolves. Sometime later I barely remember being picked up and carried, and then laid down safe in my bed, with Jake where he belongs, his arms tightly around me.

***

I was alone when I woke up, the clock reading not even six in the morning.

"Where is everyone?" I asked Esme, the only person around when I walked downstairs.

"Trying to figure out...arrangements."

"Arrangements?"

"Seth and Sam are heading back to La Push today. I think you, Jake, and your parents are going as well. They were waiting for you to wake up...I think. I'm not sure," she sighed. "It's so scary, Nessie. I'm terrified for my family."

I ran over and hugged her tightly. Esme never asked for any of this, and yet she is as deeply involved as the rest of us.

"Would you like some breakfast?" she asked, composing herself. There were already muffins, scrambled eggs, and fruit on the counter, with sausage and bacon sizzling on the stovetop. The fact that there were five whole people in the Cullen house that ate food was a rarity.

"Sure, I'm going to change real quick and then I'll get the boys."

I changed and ran towards the back door to find Jake and his brothers, but once I stepped outside, I was met face to face with one of the three cowboys, stopping myself just short of running straight into him. I had named them cowboys when I realized they all wore cowboy boots. I laughed every time I thought the "Cowboy Coven."

"Hey there," he said with a Texas lit to his accent. "We weren't introduced properly. Wes." He stretched his hand out.

"Renesmee," I said, prepared to shake his hand in return, only he brought it to his lips and kissed it. For the first time it made me nervous when he stopped, running his nose across the back of my hand and taking in a deep inhale of my scent.

My family always promised me that I didn't smell "edible," but I was never quite sure about that.

I jerked my hand back and he released, smiling wryly at me. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable," he promised, but I didn't take his word. "Your hybrid scent is...unusually pleasant, even with that horrid beast smell all over the place."

My eyes narrowed at him. "Excuse me? I'll let you know--eeeep!!" My yelling was punctuated by a shriek, as my dad picked me up by the waist, threw me over his shoulder, and carried me back to the kitchen.

"What did you do _that _for?" I huffed, sitting down next to Seth. Sam and Jake were still no where around.

"Because you don't know when to keep your mouth shut, that's why," my dad said, glaring at me. "You need to know when to _walk away. _I saw what you did confronting that human in the woods yesterday."

"That was for his--" I started, but Edward put his hand up to stop me.

"Let me put it this way," he said slowly, making it known not to interrupt him again. "If you begin yelling, what is going to happen?"

_Jake will hear me and get upset._

"Yes," he said reading my thoughts. "Let's wait for the Volturi to get here before we start any other wars, shall we?"

Esme placed a plate of food in front of me and I started to eat silently. Seth snickered. "You got in trouble," he sang.

"Shut it."

"Did you really take a tree down yesterday?" he asked, changing the topic.

I grinned and raised my hand and put it on his cheek, showing him my hissy fit.

"Awesome! Kind of excited to see if you're any good at fighting," he looked around nervously and lowered his voice, "but _don't_ tell Jake I said that."

I agree with a nod just as Jake and Sam came into the room.

"We're going to La Push?" I asked immediately. I was excited, but at the same time disappointed because Jasper said he'd train me.

"Yeah, your mom brought up a good point last night. We're moving the entire tribe."

"Moving them? Where? Why?" I was rambling.

"We don't know where, only Bella does." That's all he said before going back to eating.

I almost pushed for more information but then it clicked. Why? Because if...we lost...the Volturi would take the rest of the Quileute out too. No more Protectors. And of course, only my mom would know. She's the only one whose mind Aro can't read.

"Hey," Jake said, putting his hand over mine. "No worries though,'kay? Just a precaution."

"I guess my training is going to get put on hold," I said, a little sad.

"Well you can stay, but I have to--"

"No!" I couldn't imagine being away from him right now. I almost said it aloud but Sam and Seth had no choice but to be away from Emily and Laura._ I need to be wherever you are. Don't leave me._

_I won't. _He kissed my forehead. "Eat. We're leaving in a couple hours."

**Bella**

It's both a blessing and a curse to have so much space in my mind. A blessing because I never have to look over anything, a curse because sometimes I wish I could stop myself from replaying things. Sitting on Esme's porch swing outside, listening to Nessie and Seth banter back and forth, I couldn't stop myself from thinking through the last twenty-four hours, all simultaneously.

First:

The sight of Jake and Renesmee walking off to the woods to talk and not knowing if I had lost the love of both my daughter and my best friend broke me in ways I couldn't put words to. I was so busy reeling from my own realizations, that I didn't notice time passing. It wasn't until Edward sent Emmett into the woods in the same direction they had headed, did I questioned him.

"Edward? What's wrong?"

He shook his head looking unconcerned. "Nothing, Emmett is just going to retrieve our daughter before she sticks her foot in her mouth."

I looked at him, alarmed.

"She's not with Jake anymore. He's off... somewhere. I heard him a little while ago."

"Are....are they okay?"

"Not yet."

I would make this better, even if it took a century, I will make everything right again. I would not allow my family to be in pain because of my own unresolved issues.

"Can I speak you the both of you?" Jasper asked from the doorway.

"Sure, Jasper," I smiled.

My brother of few words must have been thinking his speech because Edward nodded. I waited patiently for him to explain it again.

"This may be...out of the norm...but I think I can explain some things to Nessie. Things that may be best coming from my...area of expertise."

The first thing I thought, my eyes darting to his scarred neck and arms, was his fighting expertise, but then the room went calm and I understood better. Who else could explain feelings to someone better than Jasper could?

"Anything that will fix what I've done, Jazz," I said softly. "I'm going to go to my studio for a while." I didn't look at Edward, but he knew I was talking to him.

It was only a few minutes later before I heard Emmett ramble on about scaring some human, but I was listening more closely to the short conversation between Jasper and Renesmee.

I watched them through the window take off into the woods, my heart dropping slightly.

"Bells?" Jacob's voice rang from the door, but I couldn't make myself turn around. I couldn't look him in the eye. "Bells, I'm...I'm sorry for losing it."

"Why are _you _apologizing?" I mumbled. Jake had a horrible habit of apologizing for things _I_ had done, resulting in my guilt being ten times worse.

"Because I'm sure isn't as easy for you as I want to pretend it is."

"Are you two going to be...?"

"It'll take time, but I'd like to think so. She said she still loves me."

Second:

It was the sense of trouble I felt the instant the three new vampires came into the house.

Alice introduced them to us: Wes, Elliott, and Theo. They were in the newborn army with Jasper, three escapees that stuck around Texas even after Maria's coven fell a part shortly after Jasper left. She couldn't keep the newborns in line without him, Theo explained to us.

The three men were unsurprisingly gorgeous, as our kind normally is, but they had they same disfigurements of Jasper and Peter, proving years of fighting experience. They would be helpful, very helpful, even if I didn't like their edgy personalities.

Peter remembered Theo, and promised he would keep an eye on them until Jasper and Renesmee returned. I found myself unable to paint, read, or hold any type of conversation with anyone, so I wandered to the garage to think.

I climbed into my camaro and sat behind the wheel, not doing much at all, until I smelled Alice close by.

"Whatcha doing?" she asked, twirling as she so often does. She gracefully slid onto the hood of my car, ignoring my evil look.

"Thinking."

"Can I pry?"

I shrugged. "Sure."

"Did you ever figure out what was...wrong...with you and Jake?"

I nodded, mentally noting that the leather on my steering wheel had to be replaced. "It's silly." That wasn't the answer she was looking for so I gave in and continued. "I guess when Edward left...Jake left more of a mark on me than I thought. It's...hazy, but I can remember things that Jake said and did. He made a promise to me...and so I gave him a part of me, Alice. I trusted that he wouldn't do what Edward did. It was fine until he and Renesmee...you know. I didn't know any of this consciously, but I guess -- I guess that part of me feels like the promise was broken. It's silly."

"At least you know," Alice said, trying not to frown. I knew how ridiculous it sounded, but it was the truth and I couldn't deny it.

Then within a quarter of a second everything shifted and Alice had yanked me from the car. She saw something, and that something was happening when we walked in.

Even my fast mind was seconds behind comprehending what was going on. Sam and Seth were in the house, Jake was jumping in through an open window. It was slow motion as the pale and russet bodies danced dangerously closed, hisses and growls making the hatred obvious.

Edward, Emmett, Garrett, and Peter were already involved, with Carlisle and Benjamin backing everyone else away.

Then a second passed.

I saw Wes go for Jake's neck, and a million memories, images, and feelings ran through my mind faster than even I thought possible. I flung myself at him, knowing I had a disadvantage when it came to size, but at that moment not caring when Jacob's life was on the line. Vampire venom was poisonous to shape-shifters.

And I would not lose Jake. Not again. Not ever.

We collided and I felt the impact against one of the columns that supported the vaulted living room ceiling. The support beams above us moaned and strained. I wondered if we would end up collapsing the house around us. Wes easily threw me off of him, my body only stopping when I crashed into the glass table. For a tenth of a second I realized the irony of yet again ending up crashing into glass.

I was recovered and standing in defense before I could finish the thought, but Emmett and Edward both had Wes' arms behind his back. My husband's eyes were black with rage, and he was spitting out threats in Wes' ear.

"Edward, I got this," Garrett promised, knowing Edward's temper was wavering.

Ten seconds later everything it was over. That's when Jasper and Renesmee came through the window.

"Seth! Sam!" Renesmee ran to them completely unaware of what had just happened, until she spun around taking everything it. "Argh!"

"It's about time," I heard from Emmett.

Renesmee was frantic, her voice strained. "What happened?"

"Just a misunderstanding," Edward answered. I looked over and him and Jake, who stood in front of us. Jake shot me a quick look that said _You are a freaking moron, Bells. Never do that again._

I found after almost a decade of being immortal, only one thing trumped my instinct for self preservation: the instinct to protect my family. Jake was family.

There wasn't much to say about the near fatal incident. I got an earful from both Jake and Edward, as expected. Of course every brainless act I had ever done, including one episode of solo cliff diving, and a last minute plan that used my blood as a distraction for two thirsty vampires.

"Irrelavent. I was human," I pouted.

"Well, immortality obviously hasn't changed your better judgement then," Jake argue.

"Stop ganging up on me!" I demanded.

I heard Peter and Jasper talk the "Cowboys" -- what Renesmee had named them -- and explain the entire history of the Quileutes. It was only then that I really found myself concerned with all of the new blood -- or in this case venom --t hat would be lurking around.

It was after midnight when Edward came into our room, physically removing the book I was reading from my hands.

"I know you still cannot be made at me," he said, his velvet voice giving me butterflies.

"Maybe," I replied, attempting to put on my best scowl.

"We don't _mean _for it to look like we're gaining up on you, love." He put the book on the side table and climbed into the massive and for the most part, useless, king-sized bed. "We are just both extremely protective. Do you know what it would do to us if something happened to you?" He was brushing the hair away from my face, whispering in my ear now, his face laying on the pillow.

"Jake has Renesmee."

"If you think for one second that losing you wouldn't completely and utterly devastate him, then you are lying to yourself."

I turned over on my side so my back was towards him. "I thought the overprotective crap would stop when I was indestructible."

I heard Edward groan and could only imagine what his face looked like. "Isabella, you are _not _indestructible. For heaven's sake, _I'm _not either! Not when it comes to our kind. Those acquaintances of Jasper's are just as skilled as he is, and much less civilized. Remember what Carlisle always says? Our lifestyle allows us to retain more humanity than others. Covens like theirs are together for the convenience, not for any bond they've formed. Get it in your head now that many of those coming to fight with us are only doing it with their own self-interest in mind."

I couldn't stop myself from turning over to look him in the eyes. "If they fight amongst themselves, how could we ever win?"

"That's what I came in here to tell you. Carlisle found an older house a few miles from here that Esme and Rosalie are fixing up as we speak. Jasper, Alice, Peter, and Charlotte are going to stay over there with the -- newcomers -- until they have built some trust with us. Jasper will be able to keep a tighter control on their emotions. We also want the wolves to make regular visits, just to get in the habit of socializing with them."

There were twenty-three wolves now. The thought made me smile.

"What?" Edward asked, poking my sides. I giggled only out of habit.

"Is it bad that I can't wait to see Cauis' face when he sees their numbers now."

"I know what you mean." My husband smirked. "Want to see the new place?"

I shrugged running my fingers up and down his chest. "Sure, nothing else to do with all of these extra uber-sensitive beings around."

Edward understood the hidden meaning behind my words and a throaty growl left his lungs. "Such a minx," he said, kissing me hard on the lips. "Let's go."

Two rivers and a mile of woods later, we came up to a small blue house that was stuck right in the middle of no where.

"It seems so...out of place," I said to Esme, who was putting up new bright white shutters. It still struck me as odd sometimes to see delicate, beautiful Esme scaling walls.

"Very, but it will be _beautiful _when it's done."

We went inside to find Rosalie painting the walls. My nose turned up in disgust. Interior paint was my least favorite smell.

"Why are you guys putting so much work into this. I don't think the nomads are used to a house let alone all the amenities of a _home_."

Rosalie frowned. "It makes Esme happy and this ordeal is getting her very upset." Esme was such a compassionate person, I couldn't even imagine what she was going through right now.

"It's a cute house," I decided out loud. I missed our cottage back in Forks, and the quaintness of this house reminded me of it. "Is Esme going to sell it after we're finished with it?"

"It'll be put to very good use," Alice's voice said from the porch. "Well, from what I _can't _see, I'm guessing it will be."

"Can't? Guess?" I questioned skeptically. Alice was never one for guessing.

Edward raised an eyebrow but didn't repeat whatever he picked out of her mind.

"Your ability to see around the wolves is getting so precise," Esme praised.

Alice stretched up tall walking into the house and smiled smugly. "I know, right?"

"Don't toot your own horn or anything, Alice," Edward quipped.

Instead of replying she stuck her tiny tongue out at him. "It's when I focus on them that _everything _goes blank. When I ignore them I can see what else is going on, and fill the pieces in. Same with Nessie."

"Edward," I said, tugging on his sleeve. "Can we go back?"

"Sure."

We didn't rush back to the house, and took our time hand in hand enjoying each others silent company. It was then that the third and most troublesome thought came to mind.

"I was thinking about the Quileutes," I said, breaking the calm of dawn.

Third, and the reason I was sitting outside waiting for my family and friends:

"Aro must have seen something when he read your mind last time, right? He must know the basics of the tribe and their ancestry." I had asked Edward this on the way back from the little house.

"Mmmhmm..."

"Won't they...search for them...all of them?"

I knew the answer already, of course, I was just hoping maybe a part of me was being too paranoid and I would get to hear Edward say _Bella, don't worry so much. _But he wouldn't.

If we lost, the Volturi would go after the entire tribe. They would make sure no more direct Grandsons -- or Granddaughters in Leah's case -- would ever shape-shift into the vampire's only enemy.

"We need to find Sam and Jake," Edward finally said, pulling me into a sprint. He didn't even let me explain my idea.

Sam, Jake, and Seth all sat pale faced and horrified when I explained my worry.

"Are you...sure?" Seth asked, his deep voice wavering.

"What can we possibly do? We can't split up." Sam's body was slumped over -- not radiating the fearlessness I always felt from him.

I patted his hand. "I have an idea."

While the men found Carlisle and Jasper, I called Emily at the reservation, to explain the dire importance of the situation.

"Why wouldn't you let me talk to her?" Sam asked as I walked in, jumping to his feet.

I motioned for him to sit back down. "As you all know, my mind is shielded from the mental powers of vampires, Aro's included. Emily is at this moment, spreading the word at La Push and we are moving them all. None of the werewolves at La Push right now even know where they're going. I am the only one here that will know their destination."

Sam snarled, but Jake and Seth held him down. "Chill, Sam," Jake whispered.

Edward continued. "If anything happens to us, Aro will not be able to locate them since none of us will know where they are, except for Bella whose mind is impenetrable. Their tracker, Demetri, works by honing into a person's mental signal, if you will. There is no one on the reservation that he would have met -- he will be useless and we hope that the Volturi won't bother putting so much effort into scouring the continent for them."

Looking at Sam and Seth's faces, I suddenly wasn't sure how I would be able to watch the goodbyes between the woman and the men who worship them. Who love them. Who would die for them. I pulled memories from the newborn army and my demand that Edward stay with me on the premise that I couldn't bare to not know if he was coming back. I was being unreasonable then, I knew that. But these goodbyes may truly be goodbye for some of them.

I had been fighting the idea for so very long now, but I knew I had to just confront it directly.

Some of us would _not _make it. This wasn't a newborn army, it was a group of incredibly powerful vampires. Even if we won, we would lose. That was a fact, and I had to be prepared for anything.

I thought over what I needed to say to Edward long and hard the entire run to La Push. It wasn't difficult to get some thinking in: the men were in wolf form, leaving them unable to talk, and Renesmee was still not speaking to me.

When we finally reached Forks, I fought with myself over whether or not I should see Charlie, but when it came down to it, I didn't think I could hold myself together. I wouldn't be able to just say "Bye Dad, see you soon." Not after what I had been considering.

Renesmee followed the boys to the reservation while we took off to the old Cullen mansion. Before we left it was decided that Edward and I would only show up at the end, when we were to talk to those that were in on the secret. The hardest thing I knew I'd have to face would be Sue, who sat on the council.

"Why don't we go to our meadow?" Edward suggested, noticing my distant expression.

The meadow would be a good place to talk to him about what was on my mind, so I nodded.

It was perfect, as always, pulled right out of heaven and put in this secret hiding place just for us. I laid down among the lavender flowers which were barely holding on through the cold front that was hanging over the entire Northwest.

"Edward," I rolled to my side and lifted myself up off the soft grass. "I want to talk to you about the battle. About us."

Edward sat up with me, taking my hand in his, rubbing his smooth fingers over my satin skin. "I want to talk to you about that as well. You first."

"No," I wagged a finger at him, "you go."

He looked at me with a kind, but hesitant smile. "I love our family. I love Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Rose, and Em. You know that right?" His free hand brushed against my cheek making me smile.

"Of course."

"But...if it comes down to it, if we are losing. If we're all dying... When the Volturi give us a choice to join them -- and they will," my eyes became dry and began to sting, the air I inhaled choked me -- this is not where I thought he was heading, "I will be saying yes."

His eye fell to our hands and his eyes glazed over. I could tell the words sounded different saying them aloud. They sounded traitorous and evil.

It took a moment before the flow of air through my body returned to normal. "Edward, do you understand what you're saying? At all? How irrational that is?" I pulled my hand away from his like I had just touched a hot stove.

"I do."

"What is the point then, Edward? Why don't we just give ourselves to them now? Why put our friends and family in harms way?"

"This is a last resort, Bella. This is a way to keep you alive, and Renesmee. To keep our family alive."

"But everyone else..."

I pictured us standing on the wrong side, robed in black and grey. I thought back to my first days as a newborn and the crimson red eyes I had to look at for months. I thought about my daughter who would have to stand among those who tried to take her life.

"I'm sorry Edward, I may love you more than life itself but I will not do that."

Before I had even finished my sentence Edward was on his feet. "You would let us die instead?"

This was it. This was the question I was dreading to answer. "I would."

"What if they had Renesmee?" My husband's breathing had quickened. "What if you had to pick between her life and a life with them?"

"Do you think our daughter would ever forgive us if we did? Do you think she would want to be alive, Edward? She would be without Jacob, she would be without our family. That word -- family -- goes beyond the three of us. It goes beyond blood and venom. We stand for something Edward, we taught _her _to stand for something. I will not become a coward now, not when I have more to lose than ever before."

I hoped for a moment he was taking what I said to heart, but his chin raised in defiance. "It's something I have to do, as a father and a husband."

"I won't go." I stood without even thinking about it, his height giving me a psychological disadvantage.

"You would choose death?"

"It won't come to that."

He scoffed. "What can you see the future now too?"

"I don't have to, I just know."

Now it was my turn to speak my piece. After the bomb Edward had just dropped I knew it would not go over any better, but I wanted to be as clear as possible so there was no room for interpretation.

"Now," I took a step closer to him, "I need you to promise me something."

"Even though you won't promise me anything?" he mumbled.

"If something happens to me, you must promise me that you will not follow just because I'm gone. You will live on for our daughter's sake. Promise me you will not leave her without parents."

It was Edward's turn to feign hyperventilation. "You just said it won't come to death."

"As a precaution," I said slowly, disappointed he saw the hole in my speech. "Please, don't leave her alone."

He sighed and pulled me in closer. "I wish you were as powerless against my demands as I am to yours."

"We are asking two completely separate things."

"I don't see it that way."

We were silent for a long time. I begged tears to come to me, to be able to release the emotions inside of me in some tangible way, but I only felt the stinging. That's what was left of my humanity.

"I cannot live without you," Edward said into my hair.

I inhaled his honey-lilac-and-sun scent. "Renesmee is a part of me."

"It is not the same. I was dead until I met you, and I will be dead the moment you are, if not in body, but in soul. You are my soul, Isabella."

I knew I could never force him into this, not when I didn't know how I'd cope myself, but for my daughter's sake...if there was one last thing I could do to make it up to her, this would be it.


	23. Promises: Edward & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay again. I found out I'm moving to New York and have had to get a million things in order and now it's of course the Christmas season and I'm up to my eyeballs in family.

Someone asked me a while ago if Jake and Nessie can always read each other's thoughts: the answer is no...they can only use Nessie's gift which is by touch.

(note that this chapter begins with Edward, not Nessie as the rest do)

**This was actually posted but for some reason no alerts went out so I deleted it and reposted it. I apologize if anyone gets double alert e-mails**

**Chapter 16 - Promises**

**Edward**

Bella was going to be the end of me. I had already prepared myself for her reaction. She surprised me over many things, but this was a no brainer. Never did I think she would have her own idea of a last resort though.

Although the thought of her request made me sick to my stomach, she was still so sure that we would come out of this all in one piece. I wished more than anything I could share the enthusiasm that she and Renesmee both seemed to have, but I couldn't.

My main concern now though was the fact that both of them were broken, and that was tearing me a part. Jasper was doing a decent job at avoiding me or watching his thoughts when he was nearby, so I wasn't exactly sure what he talked to Nessie about. The night she shuffled into the living room half asleep and climbed into Jake's lap I could hear fleeting words Jasper had said to her, and then of course the bitterness of her mental tone when Jake silently mentioned Bella to her.

Jake had forgiven Bella.

Renesmee had not.

It greatly upset me that she was being so cruel to her mother, but at the same time I attempted to be fair and look at it from her point of view. She felt betrayed by Bella. Granted, I think had she not found out it was at Bella's demand that Jake keep his mouth shut, she would have still held the grudge against him too. I definitely held no animosity towards the poor kid. His thoughts were utterly painful to listen to, and had I not had so much confidence in his self-control, I would have been afraid he'd phase and kill my wife right there in front of me.

While they yelled at each other I argued with myself on whether or not I should step in, but I felt I had to let them hash it out. He was the only one that could force her to face it. And at least when it came down to it, my Bella finally accepted the truth -- no, the _reality_. Her feelings were never about truths or lies, just about facing her fear. I had tried to tell her time and time again what those unknown feelings were, but it never really sunk in. Listening to her memory -- her epiphany -- was both gut-wrenching and a relief. It was out there now, and I hoped she could finally begin to heal. And perhaps maybe now I could finally let go of the guilt I had been carrying around for a decade, and heal right along with her.

The next several days in Forks were very dull. I toyed with the idea of going back to Astoria until they were ready for the meeting, but all of the tension and excessive guests made it less appealing than it normally would be. Bella also soon showed me the other benefit of being stranded at the deserted Cullen mansion. Alone time. A lot of alone time.

We were in the middle of taking advantage of it when I heard the buzz of my cell phone vibrating across the room, but couldn't bring myself to tear away from my beautiful, sexy, amazing wife. Then it buzzed again...and again.

"Ugh," I moaned, racing to the phone and back to the couch that still took up space in the living room. "Yes, Alice?"

Bella crawled into my lap, skin against skin making it very difficult to concentrate.

"Sorry for the...interruption," she giggled, "but Charlie just called the house. He said a hiker saw people at the Cullen house. I take it Bella did not tell him you were in town?"

"No, she didn't." I saw Bella wince, hearing Alice's words. I had been wanting to ask her exactly why she didn't want to see him, but hesitated about pushing too hard.

"Well, Charlie is heading over there like...now. You need to make yourself scarce."

I hadn't even gotten off the phone and Bella was fully clothed. I frowned.

"What?"

"I prefer your previous outfit better."

"Or lack there of," she teased.

We heard Charlie's cruiser coming up the street and were high in the trees by the time they pulled into the over grown yard. I found out when we went to visit him this summer that it had been Charlie who had been keeping the yard tidy. He constantly hoped his daughter would return to him, no matter how weird the situation was.

"Henry," Charlie said gruffly to a younger man in uniform, "you check around back."

Bella thankfully remembered to recover the couch with the sheet that had collected dust, or it would have been a dead giveaway of _someone's _presence.

Our hearing could pick up their conversation in the house perfectly.

"Doesn't look like anyone's been here," Henry concluded. "You know how folks get about this place. I'm surprised there aren't ghost stories yet, to be honest."

"The Cullens aren't ghosts, Deputy," Charlie answered sharply.

"Not what I meant, sir, but I apologize if I offended you."

Through the window I could see Charlie by the cascading stairs, lean down and pick something up. He cocked his head and looked at it hard.

_This looks pretty new, _he thought.

"Shoot," Bella whispered, much too low for them to hear. I looked at her and noticed the tie that was on her shirt had been ripped off during our antics.

Charlie was a great police chief and that wasn't something he was just going to brush off. "I'm going to buy better locks for this place just in case. I'll let Carlisle know."

"Why do they even keep it? I know it would be difficult to sell with it's location and price, but they've been gone for years. What does Bella say?"

Bella's breath hitched at the mention of her name and the grimace on Charlie's face. "They're all so involved with school...and you know how impossible it is for doctors to get days off. Hopefully they'll visit this summer."

Of course he knew Carlisle would never be coming back. Charlie hadn't seen him since his visit to Elkins years ago, but he was quick enough to know if Bella and I looked the same, Carlisle and the rest of the Cullens most likely would also.

We watched them up go up the stairs, and go through all of the many rooms. We had gone to Port Angeles to buy changes of clothing, but I had hid them; impossible for anyone to find. Most humans did not climb onto rooftops.

"I'll come back with those locks in a few days," Charlie said as they walked to the cruiser. He stopped for a moment with the car door wide open and paused to look up at the big white house.

_I know something is wrong, Bella, _he said silently to himself. _Wherever you are, I miss you. Please come home to me one day._

Bella couldn't hear what he thought of course, but as the police car disappeared down the long winding driveway I suddenly knew the reason behind her refusal to go to see him. She may be acting so confident about the war, but this proved she was just as guarded about the future as I was. Her eyes were saying the words she couldn't -- wouldn't -- breath.

_Goodbye._

_***_

I called Alice back once it was safe for us to come down from the tree tops, letting her know to keep an eye on Charlie to warn us if he returns to the house or decides to take any trips to La Push.

"Sure. If he disappears, you'll be the first one to know." Alice tried so hard to acclimate to the blindness of the wolves, but I could still hear her bitterness over it.

Bella was removing the dust cover from the couch again, before sitting down with a book she had picked up.

"Bella," I began.

I must have sounded too cautious because she shook her head, not even looking up. "I already told you that I refuse to go along with your idea of survival, Edward."

"That isn't what I want to talk to you about."

"Oh," she bit her lips, "alright then."

I slid under her and took the book from her hands, pulling her completely onto my lap.

"Go see Charlie, Bella," I whispered.

I felt her go stiff under me. "No."

"Why not?"

I could see her swallowing over and over again, and didn't even make an attempt to speak. Finally I felt her mind open up to me.

_I won't know what to say, Edward. I won't know how to hug him when it's time to leave and walk away not knowing... _

Her words stopped, but the mental pictures began; ones Bella had drawn with her own imagination. I kept my face as even as possible as her fears that had also been my own were played out in her fantasy.

The life had been sucked out of me over a century ago, but the visuals of Bella being attacked killed me all over again. She saw the pain and raised her shield.

"I try to protect you from things like that," she said softly. "You shouldn't have to deal with my twisted imagination."

"You said in the meadow that it won't come to us needing to chose a side."

"We won't have to chose a side," she said confidently. "Our side will win, Edward."

Our side.

She was confident that good would defeat evil. We wouldn't need to worry about standing among the Volturi, because in the end they would be destroyed.

What Bella had been keeping to herself, was her acceptance that some of us would be destroyed too.

"Losing you is the same as losing it all," I croaked.

I had been trying, in an attempt to appease Bella, to picture my life without her in it. I couldn't.

"Renesmee would be fine without us," I added. "She has our family, and Jacob."

She was twisting her figures in with mine, looking down at them, lost in thought.

"Bella, I don't want to lie to you and tell you that I can follow your wishes. I did try and think it through, I promise."

"For our daughter, Edward..."

"Bella, don't you understand? She won't even recognize the man in this body anymore once you're gone! I'll be the hollow shape of someone whom once was. The rest would have left with you."

"So you would leave me responsible for the reason of your death?" she asked.

"It would be my choice, my responsibility."

"Nice try, but that's a little warped, Edward. If you went and got yourself killed on purpose, it would be because of me. A daughter would be fatherless, parents would lose their son, siblings would lose their brother."

"You used to consider us so much more one in the same."

"I was jaded, Edward. Selfish. You were the closest person to me by such a ridiculous leap. Renesmee was only months old, I had only been in your family a short time. Before you, I had mediocre relationships with friends and family at best. Now though, I couldn't imagine hurting Nessie, your parents, Alice, Emmett, Jasper, or Rose. This has nothing to do with our relationship, or whether I love you any less. It's about the other ones that have grown to mean something to me too."

Now I felt selfish. Kind of.

"This is the hardest part about us," I said, leaning my forehead against her temple.

"What is?"

"Your humanity. Vampires _do not think like you do. _And trust me, Bella, I'm _trying _to in the worst way, but it is impossible. I can _see_ that it is selfish, but I cannot _feel _it. When I -- thought you had died -- I didn't think or care about my family at all. I didn't take into consideration their feelings."

We sat together and contemplated our lives and our fate in silence for a long time, never moving an inch from where we were wrapped up in each other. The day was long over by the time I spoke.

"I promise...that I will try. I can't promise anymore than that, and please don't make me." I was begging by the end.

"Thank you," Bella said, smiling in what looked like a tiny bit of relief.

It was well after midnight two nights later when we finally made our way up to La Push. I saw Jake and Renesmee immediately once Bella and I entered the large Quileute Council building.

It was erie seeing the tall, lanky, boys appear from the woods in cut off jeans and barefoot, and that says something after being a vampire for over a century. I couldn't help but think back to the days when the wolves first reappeared, when their were only six of them. Now with their numbers over twenty -- well over the twenty-three Bella was aware of -- the meeting room was crowded.

Sue was at the front of the room, the only remaining member of the old council after the passing of Quil Ateara Senior a few years after Billy died.

It was now Sam, Jacob, Quil, and Seth at the front of the room with Sue. I glanced over at Embry who sat in a chair nearby. His mind was clear at the moment, but I wondered if he felt cheated out of his heritage. He was in fact related to Sam, Jacob, or Quil, and rightfully should have a place among them.

"I didn't know Jacob was a part of the council," Bella whispered, but of course it was easily overheard by most of the room. Jake smiled from across the room.

"Heritage, Bella. It's all about the bloodlines," I explained.

I saw Emily, with the scars that marred her face, concentrating on a notebook, sitting between Renesmee and Jake's sister, Rachel. She had two entire pages already filled up with notes.

Jake nodded at me and I pulled Bella up to the front of the room.

"As you well know, the Italian vampires that came to Forks eight years ago are returning, but this time there will be no peaceful resolution." Sue's voice was calm and even. Over the last several years I grew a deep admiration for her. "Bella has come up with a plan to protect the rest of the tribe, in case of any unfavorable results that may occur during the battle."

Sue extended towards us and allowed me to take center stage. I cleared my throat, pulling from the words that I had practiced on the way here. "I first want to thank you -- all of you. It's amazing that not even a decade ago, we were sworn enemies, and now we fight for the same side. The loyalty you have shown my family goes above and beyond your duties as the protectors of your tribe and of Forks.

"As for business. It came to our attention, after finding out the Volturi's plan, that they may not stop with those involved in the battle. Your kind is the only species left on this planet that is a match to the vampire, and to give credit where it is due, you are one of the reasons we were left unharmed at the last confrontation. They are scared of your kind. That said, I'll allow Bella to explain the plans and method of execution."

Bella stood in front of me and smiled strongly at the men and women in the room. For someone who was always so terrified of the spotlight, it didn't seem to bother her now. "Aro, the leader of the Volturi, has a similar gift as my husband, but he can see everything you've ever thought before. When it came to hiding the tribe, that is where our first concern came in. Any knowledge you may have of the whereabouts could jeopardize the safety of these safe havens, which is why I will be the only one that knows the locations."

Grumbles of concern made their way through the room. Two dozen eyes narrowed and looked at the pale faces among them skeptically.

"My ability is a mental shield that not even Aro can break through. We are confident after gathering more of our kind, that the battle will be tipped in our favor, but the members of the Volturi guard and their followers could go rogue at any time if they feel threatened. One of their leaders, Cauis, is especially terrified of werewolves, different from your shape-shifting heritage.

"Emily and I have split families up between several reservations who have gladly opened their arms to the situation. Although they don't know the details, they trust that it is dire and secrecy is of the utmost importance. We will pack all necessary belongings but it is imperative that when those leaving find out their location that they _do not repeat it. _I will allow Sam and Jacob take over from here."

Sam nodded at Bella. "You are all well aware that I do not like to use my Alpha command, but it is necessary in this situation. I must _order _my pack not to ask anyone their destination, and if they find out one, they _must _report it to one of us immediately, because that means the entire plan may be compromised."

"The order for my pack is the same," Jacob said confidently. It was impressive how he went from rejecting his duties to the pack to embracing it. "You will not speak about this to anyone."

"We will slowly be moving the pack members to Astoria, in order to acclimate those who are not familiar with vampires and our methods of fighting. The same goes with the vampires unaware of shape-shifters," I said. "I am sure by now you have all seen through Sam, Seth, and Jake, what can happen when proper introductions aren't made."

"Once your significant other and family has left, you will leave La Push," Sam said sternly.

"And not return until told to do so," Jake finished.

The room was quiet, with the authority in Jacob's voice ringing throughout the building. I scanned the room at the boys and men who would be fighting for us, and then looked over at Bella. She was thinking what I was; will they all survive?

_***_

The days following, full of tension and anguish, was wearing even me down. Bella and I stayed as inconspicuous as possible, helping only the families who were in on the secret, to avoid any rumors that may trickle down into town.

A week after the meeting the first of the tribe left. Seeing them climb into the vans waiting them, the hugs, the tears, the goodbyes...I could see the emotional toll it was taking on my wife and daughter. Each time the vans drove off, Renesmee would clutch tightly onto Jacob and bury her face in his chest.

One day, Renesmee and Emily were off helping the next families pack their belongings when I saw Jake sitting outside his old house. He looked up at me and gave a weak smile.

"Rachel's packing. Paul is helping her." His sentences were matter-of-fact yet sad.

I saw down next to him, allowing him his silence, yet reading his thoughts.

_I gave each one of them the option of leaving with their families. Sam did too. There are _twenty-seven _of us now and every single one of them is just as stubborn as the next._

"It wasn't long ago that I remember several overly eager and cocky werewolves helping us out to fight a bunch of newborns."

Jacob laughed humorlessly. "I guess the tables have turned, haven't they?"

"Have you spoken to Renesmee about Bella?"

He sighed and his shoulders went limped. "I want to talk to her more about how Bella and I got so close, but she's avoiding it. I think she feels especially double-crossed by Bella because they were always so close. It has less to do on _what _it was about, and more to do with the fact Bella didn't tell her."

"I had been mulling over the reasons behind her animosity too, and it was similar to your conclusion."

"I'm hopping my plan helps even things out."

Jacob and I had had a serious conversation shortly after Renesmee found out, and although I thought I'd dread the day when he came to me, I was actually _happy _afterwards. I also gave Jacob great credit for talking to me about it, knowing I am not always very clear headed when it comes to my daughter.

Renesmee ran up to us a _little _too quickly and I raised an eyebrow at her. Her run was a tad bit too inhuman. "Sorry," she apologized. "This is important though. You have _no idea._"

We followed her at a jog now, her excitement and jumpy thoughts making me nervous. I heard through the voices of the crowd what was going on before we even walked up.

Jacob stopped in his tracks and blinked several times in a row at the sight in front of him. He shook his head like he was dreaming and then stepped forward.

"So," began the sassy voice, "I heard there was yet another vampire army coming to exterminate my family and I really couldn't allow you guys to take all _that_ glory."

"Nice to have you back, Leah," Jacob said, straight-faced, but it quickly turned into a smile.

*******

**Renesmee**

I was standing with Seth and a few of the boys, waiting for my mom and Emily to grab some supplies inside, when a taxi pulled up in front of us. The windows were tinted dark and I could only see the outline of someone, and when the door opened, that someone was the last person on the planet I thought I'd see.

My mom was standing on the stairs when she saw the passenger, her mouth gaping open. Seth and his brothers had their eyes bulging out of their sockets and I just stood their frozen and stunned.

"Happy to see you guys too," Leah scoffed sarcastically. "Now does anyone want to grab my bags?"

Brad and Tanner went to the trunk where the cab driver was unloading her bags, while Seth tackled her in hysterical laughs.

"Never in a million _years _did I think you'd actually come! Cooper," Seth said turning to one of the boys, "go get my mom. Nessie, can you find Jake and your dad? I think they're at the Black's place."

Emily was next to hug her. Jacob had told me their love triangle with Sam in an attempt to make me feel better about what happened with my mom. I wouldn't admit it, but their situation was much, much worse.

I ran off too quickly to find my dad and Jake, receiving a chasten look by Edward.

"Sorry, this is important though. You have _no idea._"

Jake's face was priceless when the crowd that had now formed around the prodigal daughter parted.

"So I heard there was yet another vampire army coming to exterminate my family and I really couldn't allow you guys to take all _that_ glory." Leah was trying to hide her smile was but was unmistakable.

"Nice to have you back, Leah," Jacob said, smiling back.

It had been four years since Leah left La Push and Sue cried in her daughter's arms when they were reunited. Although she tried to blink it away, I saw the glistening in Leah's eyes as well.

I was glad when my parents left us; my mom had been staring at me every second we were in the same vicinity and it was getting incredibly annoying.

I guess in all of the excitement and with all of the faces around her I had gone unnoticed at first, until Jake took my hand as we walked with Emily and the boys to see Sam.

Leah furrowed her brow and looked me up and down. "Renesmee? Seriously?"

I gave her a crooked smile. "The one and only."

"The big bad secret is out then?"

"Yeah, _all _the secrets," Seth snickered, but Embry elbowed him in the side.

Leah looked at Jacob, most likely speculating what other secrets there would have been. I'm sure she knew about him and Bella, being in the pack and all. _Lovely, _I thought. Jake squeezed my hand.

"Did you freak out when you found out? About the imprinting I mean," she quickly clarified.

"At first I was upset because I was so confused, but really it made everything make much more sense."

"Hmm, damn," she said sounding almost disappointed. "I was hoping you'd take some swings at Jake. He'd never defend himself against you so I bet you could do a number on him."

"I would never!" I gasped.

"Stop being annoying, Leah," Jake said under his breath.

Leah put her arm around him and grinned deviously. "But I have _years _to make up for, my fearless leader."

Jake only rolled his eyes at her.

"Wait!" Seth said urgently. "Does this mean I'm not Beta anymore?"

We all laughed and Jake only patted him on the back. It was such a Seth thing to be concerned about.

"That doesn't answer my question! Leah?"

"Well, I don't plan on sticking around forever, so you are welcome to keep the title, little brother."

Seth's face brightened and his steps got lighter.

Sam was just as happy to see Leah as the rest of the pack was.

"So how many bloodsuckers are there this time around?" Leah asked taking a seat at the table.

"We don't use that term anymore," Emily corrected from the kitchen where she was making sandwiches.

"Sorry, how many _vampires_?"

"Our count at the Cullen house now is over twenty, including our family," I said. It was the first sentence I had really spoken to her. "More will arrive. Alice thinks at least forty."

Leah looked impressed and bobbed her head. "And on their side?"

"Not exactly sure yet. Their guard of course, and we've already found out some of the new members they've acquired. I'm sure many of our kind are in hiding now after hearing about the recruiting going on. After the Volturi left us the last time, their credibility went way down and they aren't see as invincible as they once were." I sighed and looked down at my hands. "They've gotten desperate. In our travels we found out that the Volturi had confronted allies of ours about joining them, and when our friends refused, they killed them all."

"Sounds like you bl -- vampires -- have this under control."

"They do," Jake said, coming up behind me and rubbing my back.

I felt the blush rise into my cheeks, still a little embarrassed of the affection Jake showed towards me in front of his friends. I would have sworn out of the corner of my eye, Leah shot me a dark look, but Jake kissed me and made it very hard for me to concentrate on much else.

Another week went by of tears and goodbyes. Sue would be the only Quileute staying since she wouldn't be on the reservation, but in Forks with Grandpa Charlie. The thought of him being so close to a possible target made me nervous, but Jake said if there is danger, Sue will force Charlie out of town on an emergency if necessary.

Twice there was a close call with Grandpa coming onto the reservation in search of Sue since she had been spending so much time here. The first time she left and went to their house before he managed a trip up, the second time Alice's vision cut it too close and Jake and I had to hide out. My mom didn't want Charlie knowing we were here, and normally I would argue my point, except that would require me to speak to her which I wasn't doing.

When he was gone Sue came and found us. "He asked if it was true that the tribe was all leaving. I had to make up a cockamamie story about a ritual. He bought it.

The first of the wolves started back to Astoria at the end of the week, but not before I met the rest of Jacob's pack -- all thirteen of them. It made me feel guilty that I was the sole reason they were separated from Jacob, but none of them seemed to hold it against me.

"How are there so many wolves now Jake?"

He shrugged. "Sam and I were talking about it with Sue. We think that instead of how we thought it used to be -- you either had the gene or you didn't -- it's how dominate it is inside of the individual. I was among the first with the original pack because we are in such close direct bloodlines, but now even those who were distant relatives changed. I guess it's an "as needed" basis. We were surprised when the last few transformed since there had been no vampires in Forks for a while, but we're wondering if there is some other trigger of _impending_ danger that can also affect it. It would have been nice if all of this would have come with a How To manual, huh?" he teased and then paused. "Will you take a walk with me?"

Jake had been trying to have a serious conversation about the situation between me and my mom, but even when he'd begin to think it I'd pull away. I wanted to escape again, even if I had to pretend to hang out with Emily and Kim, but something stopped me. It was the pain which Jacob was very carefully concealing behind the big bad Alpha bravado that made me desperate to make any of this easier on him. I couldn't shake Carlisle's face the night after we returned from Alexandria: _I can't bring myself to commit our family to a death wish._

And as Alpha, Jake was doing the same thing.

"Sure. A walk." I forced a smile and hooked my arm with his.

I saw in his head where we were heading, but the picture he replayed was of an overcast day, unlike the psuedo-sunshine in the sky that afternoon.

"It's pretty," I finally said when we reached the edge of a cliff. I looked over; it was a far drop.

Jake grabbed my hands and held them as if we were about to fall into deep meditation. "I'm going to show you something."

I almost asked what, but then I was swimming in Jake's memories -- literally, swimming. The water was barely above freezing temperature, the surf kept hitting me -- hitting Jake -- in the face, and even though I knew how strong he was, it was a feat to travel the distance from the beach to where something was in the water. I realized he was holding a person, but the rough waters made it impossible to see a face. Then once on the beach, he laid down his rescue. Laying lifeless in front of me was my mom.

I gasped and tried to pull away from Jake but he closed his fists around my wrists forcing me to see it through.

I watched him revive her and the color barely rise into her face. It was so odd to see her as human, when I only had one memory of her so fragile and...mortal.

That memory, the one of her lying on the table I was delivered on must have flashed through my mind because Jake scoffed. "You only know her as strong and indestructible. I know otherwise. I know _that _Bella," he said referring to my thoughts.

And his memories continued.

I could feel how frustrated Jake was the way his memories were flashing passed my eyes; short, bursts of intense emotions; love, hate, fear, love again. They began to fly so quickly I couldn't make sense of the randomness.

"Jake, stop!" I yanked my hands from his, disoriented. I hadn't realized just how dizzy I was, but I tipped to one side when I pulled away and for a short second I caught a glimpse of the water below us, before Jake's arm snaked around me and stood me upright.

"Sorry!" he apologized gravely, hugging me into his head. "I should have been more careful!"

Now it was my turn to scoff. "My mom can jump off cliffs as a human and yet you freak out that I may fall?"

Jake took his short black hair into his fists and pulled so hard I wondered if he'd yank it out. "The two of you can be absolutely infuriating sometimes, you know that?"

"Two of us?"

"You and your mother! For the love of--" His words cut off before he could begin shouting curses at the deities that I knew weren't far from his tongue. "You think I was okay with her cliff diving without me there? She almost _died! _And do you know why?"

I felt like I was being scolded.

"She went on this ridiculously reckless adrenaline kick after your dad _left her._" I had never heard him tack on such a bitter distaste for my dad before as he did in that moment. "She was _so broken _and I was there. I was there and young and she made me happy."

I cringed at the last word, but before I could reply he took my hands in his again. This time they were in the old garage. _So are you going to be my Valentine? Since you didn't get me a fifty-cent box of candy, it's the least you can do._

As I walked scene after scene of bright happy days, I couldn't stop the corners of my lips from turning upwards in a smile. It was so.._._

"Easy," Jake finished. "I know it's hard for you to think of us like this, and I know you are upset with Bel-"

Now it was my turn to screech. "Upset? She _lied _to me, Jacob! Lie!"

"No," he carefully clarified, definitely trying to watch his words. "She -- no _we _-- just never told you everything. How would you tell your own daughter something like this? It was a very dark time in her life that she found me, Renesmee. She may have been mortal on the inside, but on the outside she looked as good as dead. I probably had no right to keep pursuing her the way I did, but I was young and Bella was the first girl I had ever felt that way about."

"And then my dad came back, and she picked him," I said with a little too much hostility. I immediately felt badly when Jake winced.

"Yes, and although she made it clear where her heart was, I only saw her denial as a challenge. I knew she _had _feelings for me when he was gone, and I knew there was a part of her she couldn't be around Edward. Looking back on it, I don't know how Edward didn't end up killing me out of pure annoyance. If you and I were in their roles, I wouldn't have had such restraint." He chuckled at his own fantasy.

"She didn't tell me," I insisted.

"It's not a part of her past that she easily talks about. Not a part of Edward's either. She won't forgive herself for hurting both of us, and he'll never forgive himself for leaving her and forcing her to get to that point."

He took my hands again and showed me the woods and my mom laying on the forest ground in the fetal position.

_Have you been hurt?_ It was Sam's voice, not Jacob's.

She again looked...dead. Comatose.

"When he first left she did nothing for months but go to school and work. I didn't see her -- no one did -- Charlie told my dad. Then she showed up one day and she looked soulless. Even when she seemed happy she'd wrap her arms around herself for no reason, like she was trying her hardest to keep herself together. Can you try to understand that admitting the feelings she had for me just forces her to think about back then?"

I saw through Jake's eyes my mom sitting in his old garage rocking back and forth, holding herself just as Jake had said.

"How could you be angry with her then? I've never seen you so angry."

"Because although I understand _why _she kept it from you, we all knew what was going to end up happening. She hid from it, which was selfish because her denial was going to end up hurting other people. But," he stopped, scratching his chin, "I think this really forced her to deal with it."

I sat down at the edge of the cliff, looking at the white foam of the waves, wishing I could wash away my anger.

Jacob let out a deep breath and I knew the serious conversation was over. "Your parents are leaving with Seth and Leah soon, we should get back." He sounded a little lighter, and his face not so stiff; I was glad I let him get everything off of his chest.

Everyone was waiting for us when we got back down to the town, Edward and Jake sending each other subliminal glances.

"I'll see you in a few days," my dad said, hugging me goodbye. "If the house is still standing, that is."

Seth and Leah were waiting at the tree line, my mom standing in front of me, watching me longingly.

"Bye, Nessie," she whispered.

I felt sick again, but this time because I could only picture her so destroyed. I looked passed her and didn't reply, noticing the identical frowns that appeared on Edward and Jake's faces. I'm sure they were hoping my talk with Jake would fix everything, but it wasn't that easy.

They left, my mom not hiding the sadness in her eyes, and I followed Jake into Sam and Emily's house.

"Bonfire tonight? Down at First Beach?" Embry asked from Emily's kitchen table, tipping back on his chair as far as it would go.

Sam nodded once, his arms tightening around Emily while she busied herself in the kitchen. He had barely let her go all day. Emily had seemed to be holding it together, as were Rachel and Kim. Along with Embry's girlfriend, Crystal, we were the only remaining souls left in town.

I couldn't follow the conversations going on around me that night among our friends. I could hear the laughter intertwined with moments of heavy silence. My mind just kept falling back to what Jake had told me, as I attempted to force myself to accept that the past was the past.

It wasn't working.

"I love you," Jacob whispered in my ear, bringing me out of the daze I had fallen into. It was then that I realized I had been so lost in the blue flames of the drift wood fire, I hadn't even noticed that everyone else had left. The high tide was rising and would soon reach us, but Jake didn't seem to care. "I love you so much. I can't believe it's only been a year..." His voice faded but I knew what he meant. It had been a year since we admitted our feelings to each other. "I worried for so long how this would work, but it just...did."

"It feels like it's always been this way," I agreed. "Everything else before this seems like a dream -- like it was a completely different lifetime."

The fire crackled and sparked. I saw flashes of... something. It was too quick to hold onto, but it made me shiver all the same.

"Are you cold?" I heard the sarcasm in his voice but it was still soft.

I leaned back farther into his arms laughing quietly, closing my eyes and feeling the warmth of the fire heat my face and the colorful flames dance in front of my eyelids. The ocean breeze was sending the scent of clean salt water towards us and I inhaled the pure air. I was in the most perfect place in the world right then, but the cold hard truth was impossible to deny. In only a few hours time we would be leaving with the rest of the pack to meet up with our family and friends... and then our enemies.

"I know," he whispered. "And I want to talk to you about that."

"I'm not hiding," I raised my chin in defiance. I had been waiting for this conversation to finally come up.

Jake laughed and shook his head, moving so he was now crouched down in front of me. "I was wondering if I had slipped up at all, I know I've been thinking about it a lot. It's true that Edward and I would like you to not be in the fight, but you'll need to take that up with Edward in the end. Besides, that isn't what I want to talk to you about." I found him looking down at my hands. "See, there is one thing I didn't tell you."

His fingers were twisting around the friendship ring he had made me and he stuttered a few unintelligible words before being able to speak at all. "This isn't...a friendship ring. It's...it's a Quileute promise ring."

"But you gave me the bracelet...when I was a baby. My first Christmas you gave it to me."

He grinned at me. "Have you not caught on yet? I promised myself to you since the very first day. I've always been yours."

Now it was my turn to fiddle with the woven band that stuck firmly on my middle finger. He pulled my hands away though and slid it off with ease.

"Renesmee, I don't know what's going to happen in the next few months, but I know that I can't go one minute longer until I've done this." His eyes never left mine and his words mesmerized me into a trance. "I cannot live without truly making the ultimate promise to you."

I wasn't sure where my heart even was in my body anymore. Every pulse point I had beat in a synchronized rhythm, every memory of my life with him flashed through my mind. I didn't even notice at first that the ring was slid back on...to the ring finger of my left hand.

"I am promising the rest of my life to you now, in the most final way I know how. All you need to do is say yes." His hands were holding mine, both of us shaking slightly from the emotion running between us. "Renesmee Carlie Cullen, will you marry me?"

My world stopped, but in the best way imaginable. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. There was so much inside of me I was frozen in my state of euphoria.

"Renesmee?"

"Yes," I managed to choke, feeling tears brim over my eyes. I didn't need to say anything more because Jake's lips met mine in the longest kiss of my life.

We sat there until the fire was gone and only the last embers were left. When the surf began to creep to our feet Jake picked me up in his arms and carried me back towards the house.

The next morning, although La Push stood just as it had when the sun set the day before, everything looked different now.

There were eleven of us standing around the next afternoon, not saying much. I felt almost guilty knowing I'd be witnessing these four girls say goodbye to the loves of their lives, while I got to run off with mine.

I held composed while the couples had a last moment together, mainly because Jacob kept tightening his grip around my shoulder and kissing the top of my head. Quil stood with us; Claire had left with her mother earlier in the week along with Kaleb, Tommy, and Billy Junior.

The breeze from First Beach made its way to where we were, and I took it in greedily. It was the only thing that seemed familiar about this place anymore. It was now a ghost town.

I began to haphazardly play with the ring on my left hand, trying to get the knot that was building up in my throat to go away. I thought I would be fine until the girls came up to hug me goodbye.

"Keep an eye on our boys, Nessie," Emily said to me, clutching the back of my shirt into fists.

"I will." I could barely speak and traitorous tears were burning my eyes.

"And Nessie? Congratulations." I don't know how she managed to smile amidst all of this, but I saw her quickly glance down at my hand.

Tears were falling down my cheeks now, but I smiled back and hugged her again.

I had to turn into Jake's chest as the four girls crowded into the truck, but looked over just in time to see Sam give Emily one last kiss through the window. He murmured something in a language I guessed to be Quileute and she nodded.

And we all stood there as the truck disappeared down the dirt and stone road. No one moved until we could faintly hear them hit the pavement of the main road, and then turn off towards the highway.

Sam walked away briskly, the other men following his lead. Jake turned his face towards the sea breeze, closed his eyes, and inhaled deeply, just as I had before.

"Jake?" I asked when his eyes didn't open.

"I have this horrible feeling that I may never be back here again."

"Don't say that," I said, trying to sound strong, but my voice was still weak from before. "You will. We will. We all will. I promise."

He never did reply.

An hour later six giant wolves gathered at the very center of La Push, Washington. They bayed at the full moon that was basking us all with ghostly luminescence before taking off into the woods.

I was on Jake's back and allowed myself to look back only once. The clouds had made hazy outlines fall over the cliffs that lined First Beach, and on one in particular I could have sworn I could see the shape of a wolf. In that moment the legends of the Quileute tribe came to mind.

I had never openly prayed to any deity in my life, but as the wind blew the wolf-like apparition seemed to run across the stars. _Please protect them, _I begged to the mirage.

_Who are you talking to? _Jake asked.

I replayed the story he himself had told me, and his mind stayed silent.

We could use as much help as possible now, even if that help came from Taha Aki, The Great Wolf, and all the Quileute wolves that came before.


	24. Battle Plans: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **I'm so sorry for the delay again. I got really sick and was out of commission for a week and I'm also in the middle of packing up to move 1,000 miles away. The good thing is that I've been piecing together the next chapter for months now so it's almost done.

Now the next question I ask you the readers: I can post Chapter 18 which is THE CHAPTER (it's called Confrontation if that gives you any idea) before I move or afterwards--I could have it up by this weekend. If I post it before you'll have probably close to 2 weeks before you get Chapter 19 because I'll be driving and without internet next week and then having to unpack and such after that.

**Chapter 17 - Battle Plan**

**Renesmee**

The rest of October came and went as if it was never really there in the first place. Then suddenly it was November, which only seemed like a blur of action spinning around me as I stood motionless in the middle. The sun rose and set, but the days were all the same: breakfast with the boys, training with Jasper and Alice, lunch with the boys, strategy with the army, a private dinner with Jake, sleep, and repeat.

I looked forward to dinner every night just to have an hour without the chaos that had become our lives. There were the twenty-seven Quileutes lurking around the mansion, all of whom stayed in wolf form most of the time. I didn't blame them with all of the vampires.

There were over thirty of us now.

The Irish coven; Maggie, Liam, and Siobhan, had arrived while we were gone, along with Randall and Mary, two other nomads. It was weeks later while I was mid-fight with Alice when her face glazed over and then broke into a smile. Without explaining anything she grabbed me by the arm and skipped around the house calling for the family.

Out of the woods walked three tall lanky women, their darken skinned chalky with immortality made them easily recognizable.

"Zafrina!" I called, realizing at once the Amazons had finally arrived.

"Well child," she said thoughtfully holding me at arms length at first before figuring out who I was, "you have grown!" I felt lost in the tangles of her ebony hair and enormous limbs, but hugged her back.

"Thank you for coming," Edward said with his hand extended. The jungle women all looked down at his hand in confusion.

"Talk about cultural differences," Emmett snickered.

"We will always be here for the Cullens," Zafrina said proudly. "Where do you need us?"

Carlisle and Jasper stepped forward and began to talk to Zafrina and her sisters, explaining the situation so far and where they would fit in the training.

"That's three more," I heard my mom whisper hopefully.

We still hadn't spoken to each other.

Well, technically, I hadn't spoken to her. She talked to me as if I was going to magically going to reply. Maybe it would be easier if everyone else would get off my back about it. Maybe if she'd stop with the soft apologizes and really tell me what she was thinking. Maybe if I could get over myself for five measly minutes. Maybe.

Immediately Zafrina was added to the mix of training methods with her ability to force people to see what she wanted them to. Her only job would be to make sure no one got near my mom while she kept her shield up around us.

I say us because I still had every intention of being with them while they fought, and much to my dad and Jacob's dismay, they hadn't found a single reason for me _not _to.

"She's a natural," Jasper said one afternoon, not realizing I was around.

I heard my dad groan after my thoughts jumped into a whirlwind of excitement.

"Sorry," Jasper said apologetically as I came to to confront them. "But it is obvious, Edward. She is already beating Alice half the time and Rose isn't even a challenge for her anymore."

I giggled when I heard Rosalie hiss from across the house.

"So is that a yes?" I asked, jumping up and down.

My dad was frowning. "I have to talk to--"

"Mom will say yes!"

"Your _fiance_," he said, emphasizing the word. It still made my heart flutter listening to it.

It wasn't until we had gotten back to Astoria that I worried about my dad's overprotective reaction to our engagement, but Jake just laughed. _I asked him a week ago, do you think I'm suicidal?_ he had said.

"Why would you ask Jake?" I pouted.

"Because your fiance may have a panic attack watching you fight to the death," said a rough voice.

I grinned widely at Jake, threw my arm around his neck and climbed up his torso. "But Jasper said--"

Jake kissed me on the forehead and lowered me so my feet were on the ground. "I know what Jasper said. It doesn't mean it will make it easier on us to know you're out there.

"You're all a bunch of nancies," I growled.

Edward, Jasper, and Jacob all threw their heads back in laughter.

"How about we compromise and make some ground rules?" my dad suggested.

I bit my lip, lamenting over his offer and finally figured it was the best I was going to get. "_What _compromises?"

"If it's getting too...dangerous." Edward was choosing his words carefully. "We're going to tell you to leave. And you _will leave._"

"Fine."

"Renesmee."

"I said fine!" But my mind was running with a million different ways of how I could go against their wishes and my dad could see each and every one of them.

"Don't test us, Nessie," he said more gently.

I sighed, looked down at my feet and nodded.

My dad and Jasper had left but I could see Jake's feet facing mine.

"Nay?"

"What?" I said sharply, still not looking up.

"Look at me?"

I did, although reluctantly since I knew as soon as I looked into his eyes I wouldn't be able to be angry anymore. And I was right.

"Please," he begged, taking my head in between his hands. "I can't bare to even _imagine_ losing you, let alone it become real."

"Compromise, right?" I asked.

"Uh huh..." he said nervously.

"If that situation ends up happening...if...my dad says I need to leave...then I want you to come with me."

"Renesmee," he sighed.

"Compromise," I repeated.

He had now taken my hands in his and I saw what he saw. It made me grin.

"I know, I know. Me and my mother."

"You knew about that?"

"That she asked my dad to stay with her while you fought the newborns?" I was still grinning. "I put bits and pieces together, yes."

I could tell he was fighting to stop his mind from recalling what had happened, but I caught enough. I could see him carrying my mom through the woods as she admitted in anguish her demand that Edward stay behind. I also saw what he said to her.

"But its different this time, right?" I asked, earnestly. "We aren't fighting two dozen newborns. You knew you would win against them," I looked at him daring him to deny it, "but you don't know this time."

He nodded ever so sightly. _I'll need to talk to Edward and Sam._

My mom had felt guilty over what she had asked of my dad. I didn't.

"Jake I need you to understand why."

"I don't need to know why," he insisted.

I ignored him. "You said you can't imagine living without me, but I can't imagine living without you either. If it's getting too dangerous for me, then you're in danger too. It won't be any easier seeing you out there, you know."

"I do know," he said sternly. "And yes, Renesmee, I will go with you."

_***_

I was now completely included in all of the sparring sessions, my dad even allowing me to go up against Kate and Charlotte, two of our better fighters. Everything went fine for the first week or so, but the first incident arose when Jasper, without my dad's permission, had me against Charles who got a little too caught up in the moment and gave my head a very personal introduction to a tree.

I wasn't hurt of course (can't say so much for the tree), but it began a chorus of fierce growls from where the wolves were and suddenly poor Charles was pinned under Jake. Jasper calmed everyone down quickly, and by the time I looked up it was over, but Jasper heard an earful from my dad.

"It's not like we can request which vampire she's going to fight, Edward," Jasper spat, frustrated enough for me to feel it. "I need you to trust me. Both of you." Jake was sitting in the corner of the room eyeing him coldly.

"Hey!" Audrey bound into the room. "There's new vampires here! Indians!"

Outside the house Emmett, Garrett, and Benjamin were standing in front of everyone else, but my dad immediately went up to the strangers. "I wasn't sure if you would come. Thank you."

Kye, Adian, Hazel, and Chenoa were their names. All of them with raven hair and faded red-brown skin.

They were immediately defensive of the wolves, until Jake and several others shifted back into human form.

"These are your Quileute friends?" the man named Kye, obviously their leader, asked with narrowed eyes. "You mentioned abilities but not that they are of magic origin."

The one woman, Hazel, chuckled which put me at ease. "He is only jealous that your people come with such a fantastic gift."

"Aidan," the other male said, reaching his hand to Jake.

"Jacob," Jake said kindly.

The Seneca vampires took quickly to the Quileutes, much to our relief. They shared stories of their tribes, and the Senecas were enthralled with the truth behind the Quileute legends.

A serious conversation had begun inside the house, and my curiosity got the best of me.

"We'll trust you, Alice," Carlisle said to my aunt who was sitting worried in Jasper's lap.

"It's so hard with the wolves here, but I think so. I'm pretty certain." I hadn't caught up on the situation and was thoroughly confused. "And it won't hurt, right? We'll have plenty. Especially if Amun is coming."

"Amun is coming?" I spoke up.

Alice nodded. "He won't be here for a bit, but yes, he is definitely coming."

That makes forty vampires.*

"Is there something else wrong?"

"Alice doesn't think she should be at the battle, but the future is hazy," Jasper explained.

"Well she could stay here with Audrey," I suggested.

Audrey, who was sitting in an armchair, slumped down in disappointment.

"I know where we have to go; it's past the new house, about another fifteen miles. I don't want to be _too _far away, but I don't know how close is too close. I'm sorry," she said turning to Carlisle. "I want to be there."

"Don't be silly," Esme said, rubbing her shoulder. "Trust your visions."

"Do you know..._when?_" I asked, afraid to know the answer.

Alice shook her head. "Not yet, but I'll know in plenty of time. We'll head there a few days early."

"So I'll be alone?" Audrey wailed.

"I think you'd be safer in town to be honest," Tia said. I found it so odd when she spoke, since she rarely ever did.

"No," Audrey said stubbornly.

"I'll stay with you until Alice comes to trade places. How's that?" Esme offered.

Audrey shrugged; she wouldn't like any idea they had.

Jake came into the house, explaining that the Seneca were spending time with his brothers. _And I'm stealing you away for the evening._

I knew my dad was listening because one of his eyebrows perked up.

_A completely PG-13 evening, _Jake edited. The three of us smiled and everyone else eyed us for leaving them out of the loop.

"Where are we going?" I asked after I had changed my clothes and met him outside. He was in nice dress slacks and shirt.

"Can't I take my fiance for a night out on the town?"

"That could sound exciting if we were in any other city other than Astoria," I pointed out.

He laughed as he opened up the passenger door of Carlisle's Mercedes. "Get in."

We were finally on the main road that headed into town when Jake swerved the car to the side of the road.

"Jake!" I said, steadying myself with my arms.

He didn't reply, but pulled me to him, kissing me desperately. And kissing me. And kissing me.

"Wow," I said, finding my breath.

"I've been dying to do that, but..."

"Yeah." I blushed. It was hard enough around my dad and family, let alone another several dozen super-sensitive eyes and ears.

When the town lights were finally around us, Jake pulled into the parking lot of Clemente's, one of the nicer restaurants in town.

"Fancy," I said in approval.

"Table for two," he said to the hostess, who led us to our seats.

When she was gone he spoke. "You've been dealing with a lot of negative things. I know it seems like fun for you, but it does change a person eventually. The fighting, that is. I wanted to remind you of this." He gestured to the quiet murmurs of the people around us.

"But it's important."

"I'm not arguing with what you're doing, Nay. I just want you to be around a little bit of civilization and humanity."

We were in the middle of our first course came when Marcus and Grace walked up to our table. They were smiling, but there was uncertainty behind it.

"Hey...Renesmee..." Grace said cautiously.

I stood up and hugged her. "Grace! Hi!"

"We thought your family had died or something," Marcus added, actually offering a hand to Jake who accepted.

"Are you back for the holidays?"

Holidays? My mind flipped to the last calendar I had seen. Holy crap, Christmas was in a week!

"Yeah," I nodded.

"How's France? How's Spain? How is all of it? Studying in Europe must be amazing!"

After Carlisle decided we wouldn't be attending school, he signed up through the proper channels to homeschool us and we were "studying abroad" for the school year.

"It is, but I miss everyone. I'm sorry I haven't kept in touch." And I was sorry for that and much more. I was sorry that I wouldn't be able to be a real friend to her or anyone not included in my secret life. I was sorry I had to lie to her. I was sorry that I had hurt Marcus.

"What are your plans for the holidays? We'll have to get together."

I almost screamed for her and Marcus to pack up their families and get out of the northwest, because the holidays here would be dangerous. "Heading to Washington," I said quickly.

"Well," Grace said as our main course came, "let me know when you get back so we can hang out before you head overseas again!" She hugged me until I promised her I would.

I wasn't lying this time. I was hoping desperately it would be a possibility, but it wasn't a promise for me to make.

After they left I sat there and stared down at my steak, very aware of Jake's darks eyes boring into me.

"Nay?"

"Hm?"

"Look at me." The back of his hand brushed my cheek.

I looked up at him through my eyelashes, seeing the worry and pain that came from deep inside.

"Talk to me?" he begged.

I exhaled a shuttering breath. "I shouldn't have promised Grace. It wasn't my place to promise something I don't know I can keep."

"I'm sorry you have to live this way. I'm so sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"Dunno," he muttered. "It just doesn't seem fair that you only know _this._"

"I wouldn't trade _this _for anything, Jake..."

"Really?"

"Really," I promised. "And when this is all said and done, then I _won't _have to live like this."

Jake's breath hitched. My words could have been taken as a double meaning, even though I didn't mean it like that at all.

"We'll be free of the Volturi," I explained.

Would we? Yes. I had to believe we would be. It was the only acceptable outcome.

Somehow I managed to eat most of my food, but for Jake's sake and not mine.

We walked parallel down the Columbia river in silence after dinner, our thoughts bouncing in between each other. I felt him play with my ring.

"I'll get you a real ring," he said out of no where.

"A real ring?"

"Yeah. A proper engagement ring, and not this little thing."

I frowned. "What's wrong with my ring?"

"You...like it?"

"Uh, yes, why wouldn't I?"

"I thought you'd want one to fit your...taste."

"Jacob," I said seriously. "I know I may be very materialistic, but this has nothing to do with that. This is so much more than that." I was holding my handle up, the friendship ring-turned engagement ring in front of his face.

"Can I at least make sure you have a proper wedding ring?"

The word wedding made me break out in huge grin and I nodded.

"It does amaze me in all the ways Bella and you are alike, you couldn't be any different over marriage."

"My mom didn't want to get married?" I gasped.

"Hmmm, I thought you knew. I guess Renee and Charlie's failed young marriage left an impression on her; or at least what Renee told her growing up did. You would think she was being brought to a firing squad wearing that ring."

"Well that's probably why."

"What do you mean?"

"All I've ever been around are four perfect marriages. As perfect as one can be at least. Why wouldn't I want that?"

Jake raised an eye. "Why wouldn't you want what your parents have? Like their...love?"

"Don't start," I said through my teeth, knowing where he was heading. Every opening he possible could he tried to talk to me about Bella. "I get it. The different loves, blah, blah, blah. I'm working on it. Okay?"

"I just don't want you to regret anything that you're doing. She loves you so much and you're killing her."

And my heart finally broke a little at his words.

We were silent on the way back to the car and the entire way home.

I was waiting outside the house for Jake to catch up -- he had gone into the woods to change and talk to Sam and Seth -- when I heard the faint notes of a cell phone key pad chime.

"Hello, J? It's Bella Cullen. We need to talk."

***

**Bella**

"Bella, it's wonderful to hear from you again. It's been a while. How is your family?" the tenor voice on the other line said lightly.

"They're... fine." Anyone could probably hear the lie in my reply, but we were beyond that. "I would prefer to talk to you in person. It's... it's not about papers this time. Are you free tomorrow evening?"

"But of course, for my priority clients I always clear my schedule. How is eight o'clock. Same place as usual?" We always met at the Pacifico, the same restaurant I had gone to the very first time I had used his services. I hadn't seen him since we moved back out west to update our papers.

"Sounds fine. See you then, J. Thank you again."

The wind drifted through the open window and I could smell the sweet scent of my daughter from not too far away. "Renesmee?"

Only a second later she peaked her head around the corner, her face still blank of emotion.

"Eavesdropping is rude. And you may not be speaking to me, but please watch your thoughts around your father. He will only worry."

She scoffed at me and turned back into the trees. I could hear her meet with Jake downstairs, him reprimanding her for still being cold towards me. They must have switched to their private communication, because it went silent after that.

I sat down in the library with a piece of fancy linen paper and ball point pen in my hand. I knew what I needed to say, but actually writing it down made it so much more real.

_Dad,_

_If you're reading this letter, that means the worst has happened. I'm sorry that this is a lot to take in but_

I took one long shuttering breath, forcing myself to continue.

_I need you to be strong. I needed you to know that any rumors that we've run away or disappeared won't be true. I would never leave you like that. I don't want you living your life thinking I am out there somewhere. I don't want you looking for me. I will be gone. We all will be gone._

_So I need to tell you now how much I love you. How much you mean to me. My two years in Forks were better than the 17 years before, and so much of that was because of you._

_What I'm doing is for me, for Edward, and for Renesmee. Whatever the cost may be, I need you to know it was worth it. I don't regret a single part of my life, if anything I am thankful for it. Not many people can be truly happy, and I can honestly say that I am._

I wish I could have written something to describe how final this was. Something that would convince Charlie there were no hidden meanings behind these words -- but that was impossible. The word death, or anything similar to it, was one thing I could not will my hand to write. I couldn't bare to tell Charlie that I was killed. That we had been murdered. Instead I wrote more sappy memories. I wrote more loving things that a daughter tells her father. Then I had to end it.

_I'm so sorry Dad, for everything you've had to endure the last eight years. For everything I will put you through by hurting you now. Take care of yourself, take care of Sue, and never forget that I love you more than words could ever describe._

_Bells_

My hand fell off the page as I finished the last letter, leaving a broken ink line. I couldn't breath without choking. I knew it would only be seconds before someone would hear me, so I held my breath, depriving myself of my senses. The lump still sat in my throat, and my eyes were stinging beyond anything I'd felt before. This, this was true heartbreak.

I tested out my breathing, now only slightly shaky with emotion, and took in the scents that flooded me. The first one to hit was the ever familiar honey-lilac-and-sun. I turned slowly to see him in the doorway.

"I shouldn't ask, should I?" said his perfect voice.

I folded the letter up and slid it into the envelope already addressed to Charlie. "No." I couldn't look up at him. "I need to run an errand tomorrow."

"Okay." And just as silently as he walked in, he turned and walked out.

I left the house late afternoon, taking Alice's Porsche with her permission being that it was the fastest car we had besides Edward's Vanquish. No one asked me where I was going; not Edward, not my family, not our guests. Jake was the only one standing at the car as I went to leave. He handed me two envelopes, one addressed to each of his sisters, but both addresses were the same -- Rebecca's address in Hawaii.

"How did you...?" No one had seen me writing the letter, and Edward couldn't read my mind. Even if Alice saw me, which I doubted since it would be the last thing she was looking out for, she wouldn't tell Jake of all people.

"Nay told me she heard you talking to that lawyer guy, but said it wasn't about papers. I figured there was only one other thing you would need him for."

Damage control. Because that's what we were doing; damaging our families.

I took the envelopes from him which were hot from being in his hand, and got into the bright yellow car. "I'll be back tonight."

It was normally a three plus hour drive to Seattle, but I made it in under two. The entire ride there the hand that had held the letters felt like it was searing hot. Like my skin was melting. It was so strong I checked a dozen times to make sure it was still stone cold and in one piece.

I pulled up at the restaurant, the boys at the valet were immediately drooling over the car and I could hear them arguing over who would get to take it. An older blonde boy opened my door helping me out with his hand, trying as hard as possible not to pull away from the shock of my icy touch.

The man behind the podium, the manager I was guessing, stuttered for thirty seconds before being composed enough to lead me to the back where I normally met J. I had worn a cream suit instead of a dress, but I still attracted many stares as the maitre d' took my black trench coat. J was already waiting for me, knowing by now I was early for everything, in a crisp pinstripe suit and tie.

"Mrs. Cullen." He stood up and nodded his head gracefully.

"Please, J, it's Bella. Remember?"

"Yes, of course. It's been awhile, what can I do for you tonight? You sounded urgent on the phone."

I slid a large manila envelope across the table, my hand still burning. "I'm going to need you to send these, if you don't hear from me by the first of February."

I know it would be long over by then, but I wanted to give some a little extra time in case there were survivors that could get to Charlie or Jake's sisters first. Maybe prepare them a little better.

J nodded slowly, running his hand across his balding head. "Will you be terminating my services also?"

"I don't know that yet. The future is... unclear."

"I'm sorry to hear that," he stared down at the envelop and then raised his eyes to meet mine. "Forgive me for prying, but I do know some..._people..._if your family is in any type of danger."

I smiled gently at the aging man. "Unfortunately, J, this is something that we will have to deal with on our own."

"Understandable," he said nodding his head, but his face said something different.

Was I so transparent that a man, a completely average man, could read my desperation and urgency?

"Your fee is in the envelop--"

"Bella, this is nothing you need to pay for," he interrupted.

"Think of it as a holiday bonus," I said weakly, my smile not fooling him, for his face turned down in a frown.

I rose from my seat and slipped into my coat that the maitre d' was already holding open.

"It's been a pleasure, as always," J said, standing in front of me. "And I truly _do _hope to hear from you before the first of February."

"I hope so too, J, thank you for everything."

The streets of downtown Seattle were still buzzing with life as I drove towards the highway. The signs for north and south stood before me. North would lead me to Forks and Charlie. I could just...tell him. If _I _was the only one that knew he knew, he wouldn't be in danger. At least then he'd understand the cryptic letter I had written, and my pathetic last attempt to ease his heart.

But would it help?

My subconscious must have thought it wouldn't, because I was driving south on the interstate.

The light pollution from the city died the closer I got to the state border. I turned off the headlights making it impossible to see on the unlit highway, and floored the gas pedal to the ground.

_I'm doing the right thing._

It was close to midnight when I pulled into the garage. All seemed quiet, and several of the cars were missing, meaning many of our red-eyed guests were probably leaving the area to hunt.

No matter how long I lived -- which would be a _very very very _long time I hoped -- thinking about that would never get any easier.

The garage was dark but I could easily make out the giant outline of a man.

"Jake? What are you doing out here?"

"Could hear you coming from miles away," he grumbled. "Poor car." He jokingly stroked the Porsche's hood.

"Funny. Where is everyone?"

"Hunting. I didn't feel like it."

We stood there opposite each other, awkwardly looking from one direction to the next.

"I get it now," Jake said, suddenly.

"Get what?"

He walked into the starlight because all that was left of the moon was a tiny sliver. "Did Edward tell you what Nay asked of me?"

I smiled and nodded. "Sounds familiar, huh?"

"Yeah, 'cept I told you I wouldn't stay for you."

"There is nothing comparable between then and now, Jacob. Between me and Renesmee."

"No, I know that. I just get it. I get why Edward _did _stay."

"Maybe you should tell him that," I suggested.

He scoffed at me. "Like he hasn't already heard me thinking about it."

"Very true."

The uneasy feeling came back, which was so wrong because Jake was -- no _is --_ my best friend and nothing should be awkward between us. It's supposed to be easy.

"Look, Jake--" I began at the same time "Look, Bella--" came out of his mouth. We both laughed.

"Me first," Jacob insisted. "I'm sorry it has to be weird with us right now. I'm just torn--"

"Don't worry about it Jake, really. I know you're really between a rock and a hard place right now. It'll get better?" I meant the last part as a statement but it came out a question.

"Of course it will!" he said picking me up in a big bear hug before I could react.

I heard the sharp breath from outside and I immediately knew.

"What the hell?" Renesmee shrieked. I turned to face her and the rest of our family. "What are you two like... BFF now?"

"BFF?" I heard Esme ask Alice under her breath.

"Best friends forever. It's a thing the kids say."

Renesmee turned shortly to hiss at the 'kid' reference and then switched her attention back to us.

"We were always_ BFF_," Jake said, raising his hands to air quote her acronym. I had to admit I was shocked he confronted her like that.

"Jake, it's okay." I didn't want to cause anymore discord between them.

"Oh, grow up, Renesmee!" It was Alice now, her patience definitely at wits end. "Get over yourself. Seriously!"

Nessie turned ten shades of red, now embarrassed at her childish outburst and stomped off to the house.

Edward was besides me, trying to soothe me, but failing. "I don't know what else to do. I don't know what she's _thinking._" Then I stopped and looked up at my husband; my _mind reading _husband. "Care to share?"

It was a lot to ask of him, I knew that, but it was killing all of us.

"She's gotten much better at watching her thoughts around me, especially regarding this," he said, frowning, lowering his voice below a whisper. "And from what I've caught...she really doesn't even know_. _I think it's like her eight year old self fighting her adult self. We've never really figured out how that works."

Putting her attitude into a body of a young kid actually made everything look much better to me. It was like a temper tantrum.

The vampires and wolves that were around had already headed towards the clearing for some more practice. It was amazing how well the two species were working well together.

Snow fell again that night, as it had been off and on all season, and by the time Renesmee woke up the next morning to join in, a foot of white fluffy snow had blanketed the ground.

If it would make anything better I would apologize to Edward over and over again for giving him such grief over not wanting to train me to fight the Volturi the first time around. Watching Renesmee and Charlotte fight made me want to gouge my eyes out.

"No, Nessie, you can't go at them like that. You're tall, but still you're built smaller. Use your lack of size to your advantage."

Over and over again I watched horrified while Peter and Charlotte took turns crouching and leaping at her.

"Edward," I grabbed at his arm, "how can you be here and watch this, but you couldn't help me? She's our daughter!"

"Mmmhmm," was the only answer I got at first. We were distracted by Nessie catching Charlotte by surprise from behind and beaming victoriously. "I've learned a lot since then."

"Like what?"

"She's your daughter, that's what."

We practiced the entire day and well into the evening on teams; one team I would shield and try to stay around them specifically during a physical battle while Zafrina continuously tried to blind them. She represented Jane, Alec, and any other mental ability the Italians had gathered in their travels. If she beat me, that meant they did.

_Was this what the queen was? It would all fall on me in the end? If my shield went down, would every single person I love would go down too?_

I worried over this, while trying at the same time to keep up our battle practice.

Kate was confronting Nessie now, and although she was told not to use her ability during the physical practice, it still made my skin ache when I'd remember seeing her shock Edward repeatedly while trying to teach me to extend my shield. I felt myself become even more defensive, pulling my working mind tighter around my daughter.

Then out of the corner of my eye I saw Edward taking on Jasper, Emmett, and Garrett all at once. I knew that Jasper wanted to be ready for any situation, but my husband's speed and mind reading skills were not helping him in that scenario.

My eyes flickered between the two scenes, all the while trying to keep Alice, Benjamin, and Senna under my protection as well. I suddenly felt the light that was my daughter burn the fringe of my shield, and realized the fight between her and Kate move much farther from the rest of the group.

I begged and pleaded with my shield to follow her, to continue to bend and turn as she did, but the way they wound around others -- the "enemies" in this battle play -- just wasn't something it could do.

Then it was Edward moving in the opposite direction, even farther from Renesmee. I could feel the threads of my shield begin to snap at the seams; the instinct to protect myself over all others was taking back over.

_But it's my daugher! My husband! My family!_

And just when I thought I was going to be split it two, it happened.

Off of my shield popped two little bubbles. One molded around Edward, flexing as he did. The other was protecting Renesmee, as she tumbled away gracefully from Kate, the snow bursting into the air in brand new snowflakes.

I couldn't do or say anything for a minute, trying to wrap my mind around what just happened.

"Alice," I said with shaky breath, my nerves making her stop in her tracks. "I need you to walk towards Edward."

She ceased practice with the others and looked over at me. "Bella, what are you--"

"Just, do it."

My sister began to walk away from my shield and just as I felt her light begin to burn the safety of my mind, I willed again to keep her with me.

Three bubbles.

Just like that fated day back in Forks when I learned how to let go of my shield, no one could see it except for me. To my own amusement, I realized no one but Alice was even paying any attention to me, and her concern was fleeting if any.

"Edward," I called over to him, a grin across my face. Now everyone looked towards my high pitch and unquestionably happy voice. "We need you for an experiment. Zafrina, do you mind?"

I ignored the fact that Edward's eyes were burning into me with question, as Alice helped to gather several of our family and friends to use as guinea pigs. Alice stood on one side of me, and made Edward stand on her other.

"Can you blind us?" I asked of the Amazon woman.

With only a slight nod of her head the majority of the group gasped and stood hunched in defensive instinct when they saw the darkness.

"So?" Edward asked impatiently. "We're well aware of how flexible your shield is."

"Try and read Alice's mind, Edward," I dared.

His stare went from nonchalant to frustration to concern. "What the...?"

"Oh my God, Bella!" Alice's foresight caught up and she could see what was happening.

"Edward, what is it?" Benjamin asked, anxiously.

"Normally, if I'm under Bella's shield, I can read anyone else who is. But... I can't... read... Alice..."

"Alice, walk completely around everyone and stand on the other side," I ordered.

The group still stood in a calming blindness, while Alice and Edward exchanged confused glances from yards away from each other and a huge blockade between them. Renesmee came over, her bubble still dancing around her.

"That's enough, Zafrina, thank you," I nodded, and she released the rest.

More family and friends had wandered towards us, hearing the sudden silence of the practice field.

"Bella, love?" Edward cupped my elbow in his hand. "What happened? What's going on?" When he touched me his bubble jumped back into mine.

"I can..." What was the word? I couldn't think of it for the life of me. I just kept staring at Alice, and Renesmee who were still all cozy in their bubbles. I opened my mind to Edward instead.

"Seriously?" he gasped.

Carlisle walked through the group and towards us. "What is it, son?"

A look of elation crossed his lips. "She...can split her shield."

Murmurs began to flow through the group, which soon turned to chatter and then cheering. I ignored it all.

If I was going to be forced to be a queen, then I would do everything in my power to protect my knights in the best way possible...

"What was that?" Edward asked me. The end of my thought came out as unintelligible words.

"Body armor," I said confidently.

We could only celebrate our new found advantage momentarily before Alice scrunched her forehead.

"Ummm," she said hesitantly looking over into the woods. "We have more guests..."

The man appeared at the tree line out of no where. I had carefully catalogued every single one of our allies in my mind and he was not on that list.

He was short; barely taller than I was. His complexion was darker than ours but the cloudy pallor over it was obvious, even though the only thing I could see under his dark brown robe was the lower half of his face. I found myself blinking rapidly, going through thousands of thoughts and memories, frustrated that my infinite mind couldn't pull up what I was looking for. There was something there.

Then he floated forward and it struck me in one blow. The way he walked, the way he ghosted towards me. He was like them. I hadn't even thought it through before I crouched down defensively, snarls escaping from my tongue. Within a second there were a line of vampires and wolves hissing and growling at the unwelcome guest, with Edward at my side.

I found myself crouching even lower to the ground, prepared to spring at any moment, but next to me my husband did not read the same threat as I had. Instead his head was cocked sideways and he squinted hard at the visitor.

"I don't believe it," he murmured.

"Ramses!" Renesmee was passed our line of defense so quickly I couldn't stop her.

Before I could move from my spot Alice grabbed me by the shoulder. "It's fine, Bella."

The man took the hood of his robe down and flashed a striking white smile. The ghostly steps he took towards my daughter still had me on edge, but the uncharacteristic calmness radiating from Edward helped me gather my emotions.

"Ramses, what are you doing here?" Renesmee met him only feet from us and hugged the small man.

One side of his mouth turned upward as he took in the army we had built. "I will help finish what I have started," he said in accented English. "I may not have your skills or your strength, but I will also not allow others to fight a battle that I began."

It wasn't until Ramses turned towards the forest and motioned to the shadows that I realized he wasn't alone. Out of darkness stepped a very tall, very handsome vampire. Handsome may not be the correct word, because although I still thought Edward was the most gorgeous creature to walk the planet, the immortal standing before us now was absolutely stunning. My companions must have been thinking the same thing because Edward muttered something about "girls" under his breath as every single female within my line of vision had their mouths dropped like a teenager looking at a rock star.

"Ahem." I heard Carlisle somewhere behind me.

"This is Paris," Ramses said, grinning at our embarrassing reaction. "Don't worry, he's used to that by now."

Renesmee was the only one to reach out to shake his hand, but I could see she went a little weak in the knees when he smiled at her. Jake huffed somewhere near the trees. "It's nice to meet you, Paris, Ramses never mentioned you before."

"Paris is the only reason I was able to stay hidden for so long from the Volturi. He can hide me -- body and mind -- from even Demetri."

"You were one of the Volturi," I stated.

"You must be Bella." He smiled. "I lived among them but I would never consider myself a part of the guard. My prophecies were rather mediocre until the day I had this one," he said gesturing to the crowd. "I knew I could trust Paris and we left before Aro could see it for himself."

"Which is the only reason that any of us are still standing," Renesmee added.

"Yes, but unfortunately we came across a mind reader a millennia ago and from that, rumors began."

I hadn't seen Renesmee is such high spirits since before her silent war against me began. She ran around to everyone she could find, introducing Ramses to them.

"Did you question it?" I asked Edward as we watched her from the house.

"Question what?"

"Did a part of you question whether or not he was real? I know you saw him in her dreams but..."

"A small part, I suppose. It's definitely easier to wrap my mind around him now that he's a physical being."

Alice and Jasper walked towards us stoned faced and my heart dropped.

"They're coming," she said solemnly. "On the first quarter moon."

I looked up in the sky. A new moon. No moon. "So, just over a week."

Edward nodded in agreement. "Well, let's gather the troops."

Four days later we marched through the woods, the last light of the big house disappearing into the thicket. I cursed myself for thinking it, but I couldn't help but wonder if I'd ever see it again.


	25. Confrontation: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **My stomach is doing flips as I write this author's note, because this is _the _chapter that will make or break everything I've written before in both LAF and TPC. I just kind of threw a lot into one chapter instead of driving everyone nuts by splitting it up. There's another note at the end of the chapter. Please note that it goes Renesmee POV, Bella POV, and back to Renesmee POV.

Oh...and grab tissues. Sorry :(

**Chapter 18 - Confrontation**

**Renesmee**

After we had set up at the new house, some tents set up outside for those still uncomfortable to mix with the wolves, the traditional hunters took turns to leave the area to hunt one last time, as the rest of us stayed close by and used the local wildlife.

I briefly thought about suggesting that Carlisle get some donated blood from the hospital for the vegetarians, just to up our strength some, but the second Edward heard my thoughts he growled and glared at me.

And that was the end of that idea.

"Renesmee, can you come here for a moment?" Edward called from the porch of the house.

"I don't know how I could be so stupid!" Jasper said, obviously frustrated. "I should have considered this forever ago!"

"What?" I asked nervously, surrounded by my family, Peter, and Jake.

"Your blood," Jasper explained. "We're afraid what will happen if you bleed."

"It doesn't bother any of you," I pointed out, worried they were about to take back all of their promises.

"But neither does human blood," Carlisle said. "You smell _different _to the rest of the vampires, but we're worried about fresh blood."

The only time I've ever bled was from Ramses original gash down my arm, and the when I reopened it trying to save the hiker soon afterwards.

"Well then, let's find out."

I ran down the stairs and right in the middle of several of the new vampires. I heard my name being screamed in several different octaves as I reopened a small piece of my old scar with my finger nail.

And the voices still rang as I was shoved back behind a wolf.

"Seth, move!" I shoved the sandy brown shape-shifter.

The vampires nearby looked confused as to the sudden chaos, but unphased by my flowing hybrid blood.

"That was the dumbest thing you've _ever _done," my dad was screaming.

I was being yelled at from all directions as Carlisle tended to my arm which was practically clotted.

"Stop yelling!" I said, turn to Jake for comfort, but instead of finding his warm embrace, he stood still as stone.

"Sometimes, Renesmee," he said coldly, "I think you have less regard for your life than the Volturi do."

My jaw dropped and I stepped back from him.

"Well, it obviously didn't bother them, so no problem, right?"

My mom looked broken, and it almost seemed like she was shaking. She stalked off and Alice followed at her heels, but not before giving me an evil stare.

"You don't put anyone else's feelings into consideration sometimes. Did you know that?" Edward snapped.

One by one my family left, with only Audrey sitting on the porch steps.

"That was stupid," she said.

I shrugged and sat next to her. "I guess I wasn't thinking."

"You should apologize. I thought Bella was going to have a heart attack and well, since that's impossible, that's saying something."

I ignored her reference to my mom and changed the topic. "I'm sorry I haven't spent a lot of time with you. I had a lot of training to catch up on."

"No biggie," she promised. "We'll have all the time in the world afterwards, right?"

I grinned. "Right!"

Right?

"Wow, it's snowing _again,_" Audrey said looking up, sticking her tongue out to catch the frozen crystals.

"Practice!" I heard Peter yell from the other side of the property.

I stood up, frowning down at my best friend. "I have to go."

"It's alright, Nessie, I'll see you later." She was smiling, but I knew it was only so I didn't feel badly for leaving her.

Everyone was still made at me for my stunt earlier, and I could tell because I was purposely being ignored.

_Fine, _I said, looking at my dad and hoping he was listening. _If they won't train me then I'll train _myself.

Edward began to turn his head in my direction but it snapped towards Alice at the same time I heard a gasp exhale from her stopped us all as the snow fell around us in thick flakes.

For a sixteenth of a second I feared she had gotten the timeline wrong and the Volturi had arrived early. But out of no where, I saw Amun come towards us. He marched proudly, not like the man so deathly afraid of the guard we once knew.

"One more is better than no more," I heard my mom murmured, disappointed.

"Just wait," my dad said, seeing what Alice had seen.

And then they stepped out from behind the snow, their alabaster skin blending in with the scenery. I counted the blood red eyes.

Twelve.

"I've brought some friends along," Amun said calmly, but there was a smile stuck on his face. "I figured a few more couldn't hurt."

"Amazing," Esme said under her breath. She clutched Carlisle tightly and smiled for the first time in months.

Carlisle, Jasper, and Edward walked towards them, their hands extended in welcome. The second their hands met, I felt lighter.

Our count was now at fifty-three vampires and twenty-seven wolves.

A real army.

"Renesmee?" Alice peeked into the tent set up for me and Jake that evening.

I turned around, knowing that when the tone of her voice was cautious and careful, it was usually not a good sign.

Instead of replying I raised my eyebrows at her.

"Can I see you for a second? I want to introduce you to someone."

Outside the tent was an older vampire. Well "old" compared to most of the vampires I knew. Definitely in her fifties when she was changed.

"Nessie, this is Ingrid, she came with Amun."

The light-haired woman, most likely Scandinavian, smiled at me. "Alice explained a problem you were having, and wanted me to help you." Her words were thick with what sounded to be a Swedish accent.

"Problem?" I asked, offensively.

"Ingrid has a combination of your and Aro's gifts. She can see memories from touching people, and show them to other people."

"But once I give them up I have them no longer," the woman added.

I looked at Alice, attempting to seem bored.

"I'll just leave you two alone..."

Before I could say a word, Ingrid's cold hands cradled mine. I was about to pull away when I suddenly heard my mother's voice.

_From that first little touch, the world had shifted. Where before there was just one thing I could not without, now there were two. There was no division -- my love was not split between them now, it wasn't like that. It was more like my heart had grown, swollen up to twice its size in that moment..._

I pulled away. "Why are you doing this?"

The woman took my hands back, and although I wanted in the worst way to run the opposite direction, my legs ignored my body.

_This child, Edward's child, was a whole different story._

_I wanted him like I wanted air to breath. Not a choice -- a necessity._

My breath began to come in shorter, and harder.

_"Of course you're happy, pretty baby, of course you are." _I looked down and see a familiar hand rubbing over a black and bruise swollen belly._ "How could you not be all safe and warm and loved? I love you so much, little EJ, of course you're happy."_

"EJ?" I asked out loud to no one in particular. Ingrid shrugged and moved on.

_Renesmee was real and I knew her. She was the same one I'd fought for from the beginning. My little nudger, the one who loved me from the inside, too. Half Edward, perfect and lovely. And half me -- which surprisingly, made her better rather than detracting._

_I'd be right all along. She was worth the fight._

And as the memory of me in my mom's arms faded back into the snow-covered woods, I felt the cold tears run down my cheeks.

"She has always loved you, more than I think you've ever realized." It was my dad's voice speaking to me. Ingrid bowed her head graciously and walked away without another word as my dad took her spot, my hands in his.

"The last thing she would ever want to do is to hurt you. She was prepared to die just for you to live, before you even took your first breath. She loves you more than life itself."

He didn't try and comfort me, but just walked away to somewhere else in the vast camp, allowing me to crawl back into my tent and continue to cry.

**Bella**

We only spent one more day at the new house, leaving Audrey and Esme behind, bringing with us the tents and creating camping grounds that spanned the size of a football field speckled through out the woods. Emmett and Edward had moved a giant table to the center of it all with a map nailed down to it, which was where Jasper and Peter spent most of their time.

Although the wolves were working extremely well with our guests, it was still incredibly difficult to constantly keep their instincts in check. One mistaken growl or hiss could send them all into a frenzy, which was why the packs stuck to the tents on one side, and the immortals to the other. All the immortals except for Renesmee, Ramses, and Paris, that is.

Renesmee was attached to the prophet like a shy child to her mother. I hadn't seen her without him until he and Paris requested a leave of absence to hunt one last time with a few other of the traditional hunters.

"This is not a real army," Edward promised him. "Anyone is free to come and go as they please."

He didn't have a reply to Edward, but instead took a long look at me, which I found him doing ever since his arrival.

When they returned he found me sitting outside of a tent with one of my books, and motioned to Paris, who was practically his shadow, to leave us for a moment.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" he asked.

I shrugged, placing my book down and turning my attention to the man. "I'm not quite sure how to interpret the way you look at me."

"Yes..." he began, but his voice drifted off in thought. "The blame you put on yourself for all of this makes me curious as to why."

Good things...no, wonderful things, had happened to me in the last decade, but yes, I suppose he was right.

"I feel like I was this domino that set everything in motion," I said, frowning.

Without me there would be no James, no Victoria, no newborn army. Edward would have never run off to Italy, and I would have never followed. The Volturi would have never have had to give the ultimatum of my death or transformation. There would be no confrontation over immortal children, no battle now.

Ramses chuckled to himself. "That is quite, mmm...how do you say it? Uh, high-and-mighty of you, do you not think?"

I chewed on my impenetrable lip with my razor sharp teeth, not knowing what to say.

"You were not the domino that pushed the rest over the edge, but one of thousands in the middle of an unstoppable force that could be traced back far before even _my _time."

"What...what would have happened if we didn't believe Renesmee? What if we never went to Alexandria?"

The olive skinned man looked at me through his burgundy eyes, now rich with new kill, and though terrifying, at the same time they seemed peaceful.

"Child, no matter what lifetime we are in, you always would have come. Any world where the prophecy is broken, is one that does not -- that cannot -- exist."

I could handle vampires, werewolves, and anything else mystical, but prophecies were something I could not wrap my mind around.

"Not so high-and-mighty now, are we?" he winked, rising from his place on the ground. "I must go find Paris. He gets anxious when we were a part for too long."

The magician left me there, with my book in my lap, completely speechless. Edward crept up from behind me and pulled me into his arms, kissing up and down my jaw.

"What was that about?" he whispered with a smile on his face.

"Like you don't know," I sassed.

His lips turned up into a crooked grin. "Maybe..."

From yards away I could here the muffled sounds of crying, and since Audrey was at the house, I assumed it was Nessie.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked.

"She's just...getting a different perspective on some things."

I questioned him with my eyes, but he didn't elaborate anymore.

For two more days we waited an aura of nerves and worry. Every time I saw my sister I would search for any hint of our future, but it always came up blank.

It was on the third day that Élisabeth insisted we go for a walk, for my anxiety was driving Gabriel crazy.

"I miss my studio," I said glumly. "Couldn't we just go back and wait for them _comfortably,_" I joked.

As we turned a corner of trees, my dead heart dropped when I saw Alice walking with Edward, a look of sadness in her eyes. She was coming to say goodbye. At the exact same time they both suddenly stopped. Edward's head tilted upwards and towards the north, the sun sending shards of rainbows across his skin, while Alice's face went blank with visions.

He turned and looked at me. When our eyes locked, I knew.

"How close?"

"Ten miles or so."

"I better find Renesmee and the packs."

Edward nodded, walking off towards the camp of vampires with Élisabeth. It was such an odd conversation. It was so even; so matter-of-fact -- as if I could have been asking him about his day, or maybe whether or not he wanted to go hunt tonight. It was normal, like our lives hovering in limbo was completely unphasing now.

Alice jumped up and grabbed me around the neck, hugging me tightly. "Be safe, Bella. Please, be safe. I love you."

"I love you too, Alice," I said with baited breath. I couldn't watch her walk away so I turned instead and walked back towards the direction I came in, trying to think of anything else except the intense fear in Alice's embrace.

Now, normally when a coincidence occurs, rational people such as myself can give a dozen reasons why it is just that and only that -- a coincidence.

But then sometimes it's impossible to be objective. That the odds of something being completely and utterly on purpose outweighs any possibility of coincidence.

It was somewhere in the back of my mind that I first realized it. It was the wall calendar of Esme's that hung in the kitchen -- each month dedicated to a different flower -- that came into my mind's eye. This month featured the poinsettia.

I had to stop walking, and Edward must have noticed because he was no longer walking in the opposite direction, but coming up from behind me.

"Bella? Love?" The back of his hand brushed my cheek.

"Eight years," I sighed.

"What is it, Bella?" His voice was more urgent now than before. It was what it should sound like if ones entire family is in danger.

"Today's date."

I heard Alice several yards away from us inhale harshly. Edward ceased to breath completely.

My legs picked up pace again, saying nothing more, and took off in the same way I had been heading in. I could tell Edward hadn't moved an inch.

I had to decide what that meant. Exactly eight years ago we faced them. Did they do this on purpose? Did they enjoy the irony? Did they see some dark humor in it?

Ramses was the first face I saw, with Renesmee appearing from a tent behind him.

"Did you know?" I demanded. "Did you know the date?"

"I did not, but it makes sense."

"Sense, how?"

"It _could _have happened then, it just did not. Think of it as like a..."

"Repeat," I sighed. Yeah, that I knew well.

"Mom?" It was the first word she had spoken to me voluntarily in months. If it hadn't been edged with such distress, I would have been overwhelmingly happy.

I had no words to say back to her. Or at least none of any comfort.

Sam and Jake had been standing among the shadows of an evergreen tree and stepped out only feet from me. I raised my eyes to my best friend, and that was all he needed.

Orders among the wolves began to bark, and massive men and boys ran off into the woods to transform. Jake took Renesmee in his arms. I led Ramses and Paris back to the rest of the vampires to allow them their privacy.

They were all ready for us, but I had not a clue what to say. Their eyes, both crimson and gold, were looking at us for their orders. Edward took his place at my right, Carlisle to my left. Soon it was Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper behind me as well. Why me? I was no leader, I was no military professional. I was just...me. Just Bella.

I wanted to tell our followers that I only knew my own fate, which was Edward's fate as well -- two halves of a whole. But in sudden moment of clarity that all changed. And that clarity was my daughter.

I felt Renesmee hook a finger through a belt loop of my jeans, like she used to do when she was little.

Renesmee.

She was, by flesh, blood, and love, truly the whole of our two halves. Wasn't her fate woven into ours as well?

I could only ponder over it for a fraction of a second before Jacob's animal scent wafted in my direction, and his cold nose touched my neck.

Jake. It was his fate too, because he had found his other half in my daughter. And if that was so, our fate extended to all of the wolves.

Esme grabbed my hand. Hers also.

I heard Carlisle take a breath. And his.

Here I had gone and stumbled across this clandestine world by complete and utter accident so long ago, and all the while I believed it was my fate it revolved around.

I was wrong.

Ramses was right.

For the first time I took a good, hard, look at our gathering. It wasn't my fate. It wasn't his, hers, or theirs. It was ours.

"This isn't about us or them." The strength behind my voice took even me by surprise. "This is about something that is _going_ to happen because it _has_ to happen. We cannot face them thinking we must win. It is no longer about winning or losing."

"Of course we need to win!" one of Amun's followers shouted in anger. "We will not be led to slaughter!"

Edward took a step forward. "You have misunderstood her, friend," he said calmly. I felt the atmosphere change around us and would have to remember to thank Jasper later. "Of course victory is our goal, but to win is to claim power -- and we cannot look at it that way. This is about right and wrong. This is about doing what needs to be done. Power is their only goal, and it cannot be ours, or we will end up no better than they."

The crowd quieted.

Edward's head was the first to turn towards the north, and almost as if on cue two dozen snarls erupted from the wolves. The scent hit me; a mixture of all things sour and spoiled.

They were here.

I turned and watched Renesmee have one last heartfelt moment with Jacob, running her hand through his shaggy coat. I could see myself there, in her beautiful brown eyes, like I had been since the day I met her.

But she wasn't me.

She wasn't clumsy or ordinary. She wasn't helpless or insecure. She wasn't any of the things I had been.

"But," said the musical voice in my ear, "she is brave and proud. She's stubborn as a mule and extremely bright. And most importantly, she is passionate to a fault. All of the reasons why I fell in love with you." I wasn't sure if I was now lowering my shield without thinking, or if I had spoken aloud, but either way, Edward was there.

Jake walked by me, his russet fur rubbing against my arm and I could only give him a half smile. My best friend in the world was about to go into battle, and that was all I was allowed right now.

I swallowed hard, turning back towards my daughter, knowing that those piercing brown eyes were looking right at me. They weren't as angry as they had been though... there was... something else...

Her eyes never left mine as she dug her hand into the pocket of her jeans. It took me a moment to follow her motions, but it was unmistakable once it was around her neck. I could see the engraving when the last of the sunlight made its way through the trees.

_Plus que ma propre vie._

She had tears rolling down her cheeks, but didn't move from where she was standing.

"Go to her," Edward nudged me.

I shook my head, and took a shaky breath. "No, we're not ready yet. But she knows, and that's enough for now."

Edward reached for my hand, pulling me towards him, and kissing me fiercely.

"My life was complete the moment I found you," he whispered. "No matter what happens, you are my heart. My love for you is eternal, from this life to the next."

He kissed me again, on the forehead this time, and we walked. The tree line ended where we joined the others, and we waited.

Waited for the beginning.

Waited for the end.

**Renesmee**

I stood exactly where I belonged.

It was the field in my dreams, or at least I told myself it was. So this was really it, except this time, we're going to win.

Before we had left the safety of the trees I had caught a glance at my parents. Their lips had met in a long drawn out kiss. My dad's hands were holding her face and stroking her cheeks. I could hear him murmur to her about love, life, and forever.

I felt Jacob shadow over me, blocking the setting sun from my eyes. My heart raced to what felt like a thousand beats a second, my throat tightened up, and I leaned back onto him.

And that's when it all fell into place.

True love--mine and Jacob's, Bella and Edward's, Alice and Jasper's--it spanned beyond life. Once it was found it was eternal, no matter what the outcome ended up being. Regardless of distance or of death, once it sparked, it was permanent, and because of that, it could only happen once to someone in a lifetime. It had happened for my parents. Even when my dad was gone, even when Jacob came into her life, it was still there and alive. It still owed every piece of their beings. It was indestructible.

One tear escaped me when Jake lowered his head to my shoulder. I knew he had heard my revelation.

_We are too, Nay, _he said.

And suddenly I felt quite indestructible myself, as the twilight settled around us and through the growing darkness they came, just as I always knew they would.

Aro didn't speak, looking at the army across from his pitiful group of vampires in comparison to ours. I quickly counted his side: forty-seven. Bella's shield was up and I could only picture the miniature shields that now surrounded each of us. She had a huge smile on her face, looking directly at Jane who was seething with fury.

"Let's not play games anymore! Let's take them!" Jane hissed, her brother echoing in agreement. But the great leader's face still did not change; he still had no words.

I saw my father's expression and it was one of pure elation. "You know this is over Aro," he bellowed.

"Did no one ever teach you it's rude to eavesdrop?" Aro spat. The calm and smug demeanor I had seen the last time we met was no longer there.

Edward winked at him. He actually winked.

"You will disband now and end this ridiculous charade!" Caius screamed at us.

"Please," I heard my dad scoff. "You are out numbered, you are out powered. You know all of this already. _We_ know all of this already." Alice was no where in sight, but I could see Aro scanning the field for her. I wasn't sure if they were naive enough to think Alice had seen their defeat; she couldn't because of the wolves, and I was sure Aro had seen that in my dad's thoughts the last they met.

I could see the haze of Alec's power crawl towards us in a thin milky film, followed by gasps from the guard as they saw the outlines it made. There was not one single barrier, as there was last time. No. Now everyone could see clearly the protective bubbles around each of us.

"I've learned a bit in your absence, Aro," my mother sang.

A giggle left my lips, amused by my mom's smugness, and Aro's head turned to me.

"Is that...?" He cocked his head to the side and stared harder at me. "You, my child, are by far the most gorgeous creature to grace these ancient eyes." He voice had gone back to the fake smoothness he had used to rule all of these years.

There was a chorus of growls, my dad's and Jake's the most recognizable. Jake quieted when I reached back and grabbed a handful of his coat, but Edward didn't.

"The Prophet's Child," Aro sneered, turning back into the evil he was. "Speaking of..." He looked at Ramses who was only feet from me. "I can't say you have pleased me, old friend."

Ramses only stared at him, refusing to answer.

Aro turned back to me and smiled. My dad's control was slipping, reading everything going through Aro's mind.

"Voglio la bambina...viva." The words were not for me, but for his guard.

_Nay, what did he say? _Jake moved under my hand for connection.

"He wants me...alive."

I couldn't tell you who actually started it. All I knew was that Aro barked words I did not understand and suddenly we were in the middle of a war.

Jane and Alec were hiding behind the others, being made completely useless now. They stood among another man, most likely the one that can mess with people's memories. He was also worthless to their cause now.

Zafrina was protecting my mom, whose full on concentration was to keep her shield up. Benjamin and Gabriel stood at the fore-front as we saw objects beginning to get wielded our way. The boy with telekensis was in that crowd somewhere.

Rocks and boulders were being stopped mid-air by Gabriel, catching the other side off guard before Benjamin would move them to the ground.

"Jasper!" my dad yelled, and pointed over at a girl standing tall and proud. She was the one that could absorb physical energy.

Emmett and several of our other fighters went straight for Felix and Demitri.

I could tell immediately that although we out numbered them, their fighters were quite skilled and it was forcing my family and friends to double up.

The vampire who finally approached me was smaller than I was with boy-cropped blonde hair. She was no where near newborn status; I could tell by her sureness and her movements that instinct didn't rule her. I knew they were not looking to kill me, so none of her moves would be fatal, and that I would use to my advantage.

And so we danced.

She was as fast as Alice, but her training was more novice than I would have thought it would be, and every amateur move she made in an attempt to control me I quickly countered with something more advanced. Twice I was close enough to kill her, but in a completely separate part of my mind I only thought of who she could be had she not been influenced by the Volturi.

The rest of the field was a world away to me, even the shrieks and growls were muted.

The vampire girl was sashaying in front of me, looking for another opening. I mimicked her movements, and in a moment of impulsiveness I spoke.

"You're going to lose," I said in a malignant whisper. The evil in my voice even surprised me; my predatory nature was in full force. "You can still join us and live."

The vampire-girl only hissed at me, crouching and springing much too slowly to catch me off guard. She was hanging off a tree, as I stared up at her with daring eyes.

She jumped on me but I grabbed her arms and flung her over my head and she lay long enough on the ground for a blur of russet fur to over take her.

I saw a ball of blonde and alabaster roll into the woods as her body lay where it had fallen, Jake already off to help out in another fight.

"Ruining my fun!" I found myself yelling after him.

And then I was hit from behind. Hard. I was up in an instant, this time I faced with a male, several inches taller than I was and outweighed me I'm sure by quite a bit.

_Use your size, _Charlotte's voice rang in my head.

This vampire was rougher than the female, the few blows he did get on me jumbled my thoughts, but as we fought I studied him and memorized his moves. He was murmuring in a harsh slavic language, but I didn't understand him.

Esme was there suddenly helping me, and the tables definitely turned. Every leap he went at her got me more and more angry and protective. And then it was one final blow that knocked her down, and kept her down that made me see red.

I could liken it to when I allowed my instincts to take over when hunting, but it went way beyond that. My actions were no longer my own as the vampire screamed in agony and I realized I now held part of him in my hand. I went for his throat, only seeing him as a threat. I had no conscience for these beings any longer.

My human side was washed over as if the only hint that it existed was the blood flowing through my veins. I looked over to where Esme had fallen but she was upright and fine.

"Renesmee!" she suddenly yelled in horror, rushing to me, but it was too late. A vampire was challenging her and I found myself with my arms locked behind my back.

He looked almost exactly like Felix, although I knew Emmett and the Cowboys had gone after him first.

"Aro finds you important," he said with a thick British accent. "I am Robert, and I will be your body guard today," he added in sarcasm.

I flipped over his head, obviously surprising him and finding myself free of his hands.

I glanced to where I had last seen Jake but he was lost in the mass chaos now. I would need to just keep moving until someone came my way. If Robert got his arms around me I would be his prisoner. Aro's prisoner.

A half-second later he had me pinned down.

_So much for that plan._

In an attempt to escape I contorted my body, only to suddenly feel excruciating pain travel down my leg. The cold December air hit my exposed skin and I knew at once my jeans and leg were both ripped open.

"Would you put your daughter's life in jeopardy?" Aro asked, appearing from practically no where, and extending a hand towards my cheek. I snapped at him, still restrained by Robert. "Or will you make the right decision?" I now noticed Bella stopped in her tracks watching me with a terrified expression.

"They won't hurt me!" I cried over it all. "Don't mom! Don't!" Whatever ultimatum he had given her wasn't one I heard, but it couldn't have a good outcome either way.

She looked at me and her eyes glided down and rested on my locket. _More than my own life._

My heart was still racing but I could feel the living muscle begin to tire along with my human half as the blood gushed down my leg and soaked through my jeans.

"Mom," I said sternly, meeting her eyes.

"Bella," my dad echoed from yards away.

"There is one thing you underestimate," she said through a stone jaw.

"And what is that?" Aro laughed.

"What a mother will do for her child."

"Ha! What kind of decision is that?"

"The right one." The word hadn't even left her mouth when I was flung across across the field, as Robert was bulldozed over. I never felt the ground, but instead landed on Jake's back.

_Renesmee, run! Go! I'll be right behind you! Do not stop!_ He said as I climbed down.

We were at the tree line when I heard the most horrible yelp. We looked back too. There was a wolf on the ground under two vampires.

"Jake go!" I said, urging with my eyes as I snuck into the woods.

I waited in the shadows to make sure no one was following me, and felt better when I could only hear the noise from the field. I wondered what our numbers looked like, but was too nervous to go back and risk someone seeing me. I was no good to them anymore; my blood loss was making me unsteady and the pain radiating through my leg was beginning to blind me.

It was taking far too long and Jake had not come to find me, easily ten of the longest minutes of my short life. I climbed the tree tops of the evergreens to the edge of the clearing and let go of the breath I had been holding. Jake was fine, I saw him still fending off fighters from the injured.

I scanned the field noticing our advantage over the enemy. I saw my dad move from one vampire to the next, in sync with a wolf I did not recognize.

Suddenly, Jane walked into the midst of the insanity. I didn't see Aro anywhere.

"What are you fighting for, Jane?" My mother stood only feet from the child. "Tell me what you are gaining from this?"

The clouds parted for the rising sun, spraying diamonds down on my family, my enemies, and my friends. It did not look like a war, but an intricate dance of angels who swayed in perfect rhythm with each other. The diamonds of the vampires reflected off of the bright coats of the werewolves making rainbows of rich colors fly across the sky. If it wasn't for the screams of pain, and growls of pure madness the scene could be passed for a glimpse into Heaven.

"Our rightful place!" she said wildly, but the heavenly shroud made her look like a tiny cherub; irrevocably innocent.

"We've never asked for your place. We've never challenged you." My mother sounded so calm you would never know there was a war going on around her. The earth could be crumbling around them and neither would have flinched.

This was it.

"So again Jane, what are you fighting for? Aro is gone. Alec is gone. What good are you all to our world dead? What laws can you uphold now?"

Aro was...gone? Relief washed over me for the evil that had hunted me my entire existence was removed from this life, but that relief only lasted momentarily.

Jane blinked rapidly, almost as if she was fighting back real emotion. Behind her I finally noticed Marcus laying dismembered on the ground. His arm, though no longer attached to his body, was still twitching at his side. Nearby, Caius quivered in Zafrina's blindness, only inches from Kate's electric touch. One by one the silence of the leaders hushed the army of monsters on both sides, all eyes falling on the two girls.

Something caught the corner of my eye and I spun around to see Alice and Audrey at the tree line. Alice had seen something, and if Audrey was with her then it was something good. I climbed down from the tree and stood beside them.

The sun was swallowed up by clouds once again, and darkness infected the world. The field once covered in diamond skin turned pasty white, and the multi-colored fur was dull and lifeless. The agonizing moans and blank zombie faces of fallen warriors brought me closer to reality. Now we were in Hell.

_They will see Heaven, and then Hell. That is when it will end. _The words my father read were burnt into my memory. As it played through in my mind, it seemed as though the faded words were writing themselves with a scalding gold pen against the black that was once considered the sky. When the words ended, the pen pierced the solid veil of Hades and over our heads a flood of light cascaded down and enveloped the Queen. My mother. It had always been her.

The fighting ceased and all eyes were fixated on the glowing divinity. The remaining guard fell to their knees in shock. Even if they had denied belief in the prophecy, deep down they must have all feared it at the same time. We lived in a world that was not supposed to exist. To reject the possibility that our lives had been laid out for us by some type of destiny was foolish and naive.

"What are you waiting for Jane? Give them their orders!" Zafrina had given Caius his sight back just in time for him to see his worst nightmare fulfilled. His cries of terror were not from possible death, but of the inescapable truth. Defeat.

They had reached their end. The reign of the Volturi had come to it's final resolve.

Jane looked back at Caius, and along with the others, fell to her knees. The indestructible and powerful vampire closed her eyes and lowered her head. The golden pen of my imagination sliced through the remaining clouds lighting the world up with a new sun. The wind blew through the trees making them look like they were bowing in reverence, and the mountains seemed to move for a better view. As I walked towards the center of the field I felt Jake at my side, his tail brushing against my back. How I wished I had his arms around me at that moment.

_I'm glad you listen so well,_ he taunted, but I knew it was impossible for him to be angry with me.

Benjamin released the vampire he had pinned to the ground, and the others followed his lead. We stood side by side with our enemies as the line between good and evil began to blur.

Just as things began to calm, in one final attempt to save his power, Caius lunged for my mom. All I saw was his mouth meeting her neck in a thunderous crash, along with a blur of Jake's coat as they all fell into me. I heard my screams mixed in with theirs.

Then it was dark.

My mind slowly started putting everything back together, but I was keeping myself here in this safe black world, still afraid what I'd see in the light. My cheeks felt warm and bright colors danced in front of my closed eyes. Days of my childhood appeared in the warm orange glow along with the smiling faces of Grandpa Charlie and Sue, of the cottage in Forks, of Jacob's garage in Elkins. My entire life I wanted my physical body to catch up with my mind and it finally had, only now I wanted to go back to playing innocent.

The light that surrounded me would sometimes smolder into blackness and the grey cloaks from all of those years of nightmares would appear from no where, trying to take over my thoughts. Was my mother dead? After months of the anger I was holding on to, was this how it would end? I would never get to apologize, I would never get to tell her how lucky I am. And Jake. Was he fine? Did Caius' attack allow Jane and the guard to take control again? Was it never going to end? Or had it ended?

I didn't know the answer, and it seemed safer here in this place between sleep and awake, than it would to face the truth.

I felt myself become weightless. Was I dying? Did I lose too much blood? I searched my body for my heart which was still fluttering, but the numbness of my body was convincing me otherwise. Was Carlisle wrong all along and my soul was now lost in the abyss? Was this weightlessness it? No, it couldn't be. There is no life without Jake, after or any other kind. I couldn't leave Jake.

I felt warm arms holding on to me, begging me to embrace them. I slowly allowed myself to recognize their feel, their heat, their familiarity.

It was Jacob cradling me and kissing my forehead. Was he here too? Did he die with me? Or were we alive and my mother was gone? Either way I would be without one of them, and that wasn't something I could bare.

"Renesmee? Nay? Can you hear me? It's alright, open your eyes..."

"We need more wood," a familiar voice ordered.

Mom? "Mom!" I shot up at the sound of her voice, the entire day flashing back and reminding me where I had left off. I quickly figured out three things: I wasn't dead. Jake wasn't dead. My mom wasn't dead.

I could see the flesh wound on Bella's neck, but she didn't seem bothered. Her eyes were not leaving my father's face and Edward's arms held her as if they truly were one. He turned to me and managed a smile.

"You take after your mother with the fainting, you know." He was alright too.

I was not completely steady yet and my legs were weak from my injury, so an attempt to jump to my feet failed and Jacob was the only reason I didn't fall back to the ground. My parents met me half way, letting me helplessly fall into their arms.

"Mom--" the word barely left my lips as I buried my head into her shoulder. "Mom, I'm so sorry. I love you. I'm so so sorry."

She stroked my hair and promised it was okay. That's when I cried, because I thought I had lost her and because I had been so selfish. It could have ended like that.

Then I realized it did end for some.

The remaining guard and their followers looked oddly calm when you consider the situation they were in. For the first time ever I saw Jane as one of us, and not the dictator her coven had turned into. I followed her eyes towards the fire that was burning, the one I had felt while unconscious, and saw the last remaining faces of Alec, Aro, and Caius being turned into ash.

"You...you killed Caius?"

"When he attacked me, Jake came to the rescue."

He probably decapitated Caius, but no one would say that out loud. I saw more faces in the fire; ones of friends. Zafrina and Senna mourned not too far away for the loss of Kachiri. Liam held Siobhan in his arms as he stared blankly into space. Maggie was gone too. When I saw little Charlotte standing in between Alice and Jasper, both seeming to be doing all they could to keep her standing, that's when I knew Peter hadn't made it. There were others whose names I didn't know, with their covens and nomadic friends losing themselves in grief.

But where were the wolves? I searched the grounds and only saw a very solemn Seth and Leah. I turned to Jacob who knew my question before I asked it. He only closed his eyes, tears falling endlessly. "Cooper. Brad." I could tell by how his face was contorted and his tongue pressed against the roof of his mouth that he wasn't done.

His voice was lost as he struggled for the name, but I knew before he said anything. The reverence and respect in his eyes was only ever shown for one man, even now for just the memory of him. Jake raised his chin, took one more breath as if it would be the only chance he'd ever have again.

"And Sam."

The emotions that ran through me took my breath away. I found myself gasping for air but none was making it to my lungs.

Gone? Impossible.

Sam couldn't be gone. He would be somewhere safe, healing quickly, and he would come back to check on things. Sam always checked on things. He would be in wolf form -- definitely in wolf form. I scanned the woods looking for the giant black wolf as if he would trot out of my memories and into reality. He had to. He would be going back to Emily and little Kaleb now that it was safe. He promised her. I promised her. How could we possibly tell her? How could I look at her knowing that they came back for us. Sam fought for us...for me.

"No. No, no, no." I thought I would pass out I was shaking my head so fiercely. It wasn't supposed to end this way. We were supposed to defeat them -- that's what the prophecy said. How could we lose and win at the same time? The darkness was taking over again and my eyelids were heavy. I felt my lips moving, attempting words, but no sounds came out. My family had no words of comfort because they were as far gone as I was, only their purely immortal bodies could not give up like mine could.

"Be strong, Nay." Jacob had his arms around me again. It was hard to take him seriously with his face still tear streaked. "I love you. I love you." He repeated over and over again in my ear while holding onto me for dear life.

"Never leave me?" It was a question that I already knew the answer to.

"I would die without you." And I knew he meant that with everything he had. It was all so clear to me now, even through the mourning. I couldn't count how many times had I heard my dad say to my mom you are my life. One soul, two bodies. "You are my everything, Renesmee."

One by one the Quileutes returned as men. The agony and grief over their brothers and leader was clear on their faces. Leah's face was red and puffy; her confident demeanor shattered with the death of her lost love.

I wanted to know where Sam...was, but I was afraid to ask. So instead I stood clinging to Jake and said a silent goodbye to our fallen friends as the purple smoke billowed into the noon sky.

My mom's hand slipped into my free one and she squeezed it. I felt my dad's icy touch on my shoulder and looked back to see the other one on Jake's.

Élisabeth was somewhere nearby and I could hear her sweet French voice begin to sing. I knew Jacob didn't understand her, but I didn't know if I would be able to keep it together long enough to translate her words.

_And our hero's coming home,_

_The battle's won, the white flags raised._

_And our hero's coming home._

I had to stop, crumpling to the ground, my mom's arms following me all the way there.

There was one other type of love that I had yet to consider until that very moment. The kind of love that is lit the instant life began. One that never had to be found. One that was forever constant, forever unwavering, and forever eternal.

The love a mother had for her child.

I sat on the ground with her for the rest of the day until the smoke began to fade and the flames were reduced to glowing embers.

My dad pulled my mom to her feet, and Jake picked me up and cradled me in his arms.

"We need to get that leg looked at," he whispered.

I had completely forgotten about it since the bleeding had stopped.

I buried my head into the crook of his neck, raising my eyes to the remnants of the fire that we were leaving behind.

"It's over," I sighed and closed my eyes. Instead of seeing the mist and ghostly cloaks in the darkness, now staring back at me was a pair of huge glowing brown canine eyes. I hid my head farther into Jacob and his arms clenched down tighter. _I'm sorry, Sam._

_

* * *

_

I'm sorry I did what I did. No matter how horrible I felt while I wrote it (and I was definitely crying), it felt right at the same time. I couldn't end the confrontation like SM did. They couldn't all walk away. It was so hard to press publish, because I knew it would be final then. I know TPC is only one of thousands of post-BD fanfics, but it's my story, and to me the other alternate realities don't exist.

And I know it's a barely-there silver lining in comparison to the lost of Sam and the others, but Renesmee finally figured out well...everything.

The story is **NOT DONE**, but I am moving from Florida to New York and will probably be taking a 2 week hiatus (at least).

And again, I'm sorry :( Please don't hate me...


	26. Aftermath, Part I: Bella & Renesmee

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Note the part one. I found out today I'm going away on business travel for the rest of the week (yeah they're pretty much sending the newbie at the office to the sharks!) and won't be able to finish the other half. It's a decent sized chapter, about 5,000 words so I hope no one feels cheated. I'll finish the second half this weekend. I have about 1/2 of chapter 20 already finished and the epilogue is finished so you won't have to wait too long for those. Thank you guys for being soooo patient with me!

Oh, and get tissues again.

**Chapter 19 - Aftermath (Part I)**

**Bella**

I didn't leave my daughter's side during the time she was fading in and out of consciousness. All I wanted was to be able to take away her suffering. Each sharp breath or whimper made me wince, hurting right along with her.

But the color slowly came back to her face over the next day, and then I was finally able to relax when Edward promised she was dreaming and no longer in any pain.

Jacob never left Renesmee's side, constantly tending to her. It was hard enough for me to pull myself away, I couldn't even imagine what it would be like for Jake, especially those first several hours. I tried to picture Edward being in that position, but his immortality was too deeply seeded in me, and it was near impossible for me to see him vulnerable. What did come to mind was a day that had been appearing in my memories quite often over the past few months. It was Jake lying in his bed at the old Black house, healing after the newborn battle.

_"I probably won't think she's good enough for you. I wonder how jealous I'll be."_

There was no jealousy left in me, because it wasn't jealousy I ever felt in the first place. And as for being good enough for him -- well, that was a no brainer right there. Jacob and Renesmee were soul mates, and what I had with Jake once upon a time wasn't even comparable.

"How bored are your friends out there playing babysitter?" Jake asked me in a low voice so as not to disturb Renesmee.

"Probably not as bored as you would be. This is a long awaited moment for many of them, Kate and Tanya especially. They definitely weren't very happy when Carlisle said they couldn't kill Jane, though."

"Oh, because of Irina?"

"Yeah." I had question rattling in my spacious head and it was going to bug me until I asked, no matter how inappropriate it may be. "Hey Jake, I know this may be hard right now but...about the packs--"

"Pack," he corrected me quickly and harshly. "To answer your question there is only one pack now."

Nessie stirred under Jake's touch and his moved the hair that had fallen in her face behind her eye, watching her intensely.

"I'm so sorry, Jake." I put my hand on his hot shoulder, and he raised the one that wasn't holding onto Nessie and placed it over mine.

"Me too. Do you know which vampire did it?"

I shook my head honestly. "No one saw it. At least, no one who's alive saw it. Edward has checked everyone's thoughts and you would know if one of the wolves saw it."

"I wish I knew."

"Would it make it any easier?"

"Yeah, it would. I think so at least. I guess. I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing here, Bells. I don't."

"You're doing what you've always done. Seth was a perfectly fine beta in your absence and if you and Nessie want to get married and move back--"

"Don't even go there, Bells. I'm not splitting up our family."

In the middle of such a depressing conversation, I couldn't help but smile. Our family, he said.

"Yeah, yeah, it slipped." Jake saw my reaction and realized what he had said. "Don't make a big deal about it."

I bit down on my lip to hide my smile. It's the only thing I've wanted but hadn't gotten to complete my almost perfect life; Jacob as my family.

"Bella?" I heard Edward call from across the house, and I forced myself to leave my sleeping daughter.

My husband was waiting for me on the porch and turned to look at me with disheveled hair. He was just as dazzling as the first day we spoke.

_"Hello," said a quiet, musical voice. "My name is Edward Cullen. I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week. You must be Bella Swan."_

_"H-how do you know my name?" I stammered._

_"Oh, I think everyone knows your name. The whole town's been waiting for you to arrive."_

_"No," I persisted stupidly. "I meant, why did you call me Bella?"_

_"Do you prefer Isabella?"_

_"No, I like Bella."_

I had lowered my shield so Edward could see what I was thinking. He took a deep breath, smiled, and nodded. It was the first real smile I had seen on his face in a while.

I had decided that everything before that exact moment didn't feel real anymore. I can pick out select memories of my life in Phoenix, but it's mainly only the smell of the dry heat and the incense my mother was constantly burning, and of course I could never truly forget Renee. But my life was not complete until the day he walked into it, and there was nothing too insignificant not to store away in the unlimited memory I had.

And it wasn't just Edward. It was Jacob and our days in the garage, it was the horrible makeovers Alice forced me into, it was the long hours spent with Nessie in the meadow when she was little, it was my private dinners with Charlie.

Charlie.

I smiled -- grinned to the point where I thought my face would crack. "I have to make a phone call."

Edward raised an eyebrow, as I quickly recalled for him my last meeting with J Jenks. The horror on his face was brief when he realized it was over and unnecessary.

"Mr. Scott, please," I told the receptionist as I helped myself to a seat on Edward's lap.

"He's not available at the moment can I take a message?"

"Tell him it's Isabella Cullen."

I was immediately put on hold, the boring music playing in the background.

"Mrs. Cullen, it's very good to hear from you," J's voice came on the other line.

"Please, J, what have I told you?"

"Sorry," I could hear him smile on the other end, "Bella."

"I just wanted to let you know that you can shred those letters. They won't be necessary." I was still grinning as the words left my mouth, and Edward's arm wrapped around my waist. His chin rested on my shoulder.

"I'm glad everything worked out for the best."

"It most surely did. Thank you for everything, J."

"Oh, and Mrs. Cu--Bella? Next time you are in Seattle I would like to introduce you to my new partner. He'll be taking over my practice next year upon my retirement."

"It would be my pleasure. Look forward to seeing you."

"Be well, Bella."

The phone went quiet for a fraction of a second before my fingers were dialing again.

"Hey Dad, it's me." My voice hitched more than once as my composure faltered, and he heard it.

"Bella, is everything okay?"

"No, everything is fine. I just miss you, Dad."

"How are you? You know about Sam I'm sure. How is Jake?"

I froze, realizing I had no idea what the people of Forks thought actually happened to the chief of the Quileutes.

"It's awful Dad. It's been difficult here." I was hoping he'd explain what he had heard if I gave away minimal details.

"Are you coming back for the funeral?"

"We...can't. Jake is, of course, but you know--"

"Yeah, yeah. I know." The whole fact that we weren't aging was finally sinking in.

"I want to come see you, though. With Edward and Nessie too."

"I would love that, Bella. You just tell me when, even if it isn't right away. I was just about to bring Sue to the reservation though, so I'll talk to you soon?"

"Of course. Bye Dad, love you."

"Love you too."

I didn't get up from Edward's lap, hoping to get a few seconds of silence with him, but that was interrupted by Alice.

"Nessie's coming around."

**Renesmee**

I was conscious the entire way home, but it still felt like an outer body experience. I tried to hold onto Jake's words as he carried me back to the house, but they sounded static and far off. I was off in this other world until I felt excruciating pain shoot through my body, beginning at my leg.

"I'm sorry," Carlisle whispered. "You tore the muscle and it was healing too quickly."

I felt both cold and hot hands holding each of mine; my mom and Jacob. When I finally saw them, I willed myself to keep their faces in focus, but they would always fade back into a psuedo-reality.

In this reality there was no war. The Volturi were happy where they were in Italy, only involving themselves when absolutely necessary. There was no prophecy; we were no threat to them. The Quileutes were back in La Push, and Sam was alive. Sam would tell Kaleb of the Quileute legends in a few years, and he'd know that peace was made between the Cold Ones and the Shape-shifters.

But none of that was real.

I wasn't sure how long I was out for, and each time I got a grasp on my consciousness, trying to figure out what was going on, it went dark.

Then the dreams came, and now armed with the knowledge that the black cloaks and grey mist would never inhabit them again, I finally for once let myself sink weightless into my fantasies.

The last dream I remembered was sitting on one of the cliffs in La Push, staring out over First Beach with Jake. The next thing I knew, I was definitely still with Jake, but the waves were replaced by whispers of my family.

"We need to get them back to Italy soon," I heard a voice echoing in my ear.

"I won't leave until she wakes up," my mom answered. "Go without me."

"We can't chance that, Isabella," my dad countered. "There's no guarantee that she won't try to use her ability once she's away from you."

I concentrated on my sense of smell and on top of the familiar scents of my family and of Jake, the sourness was still nearby. Jane was still nearby.

That instinct of defense was impossible to contain and I shot up to a sitting position.

"Easy there," my dad said putting a strong hand on my shoulders.

I saw through the wall of glass, the remaining enemies in a huddled group surrounded by our allies. Even being so short, I easily picked out Jane.

"Why-y-y are they here?"

"We aren't the Volturi," Carlisle said sternly. "We will not kill those who surrender."

"We're going to take Jane and Marcus back to Volterra," my dad explained. "They are being complacent in both their actions and thoughts."

I saw Marcus, who had taken a severe beating in the fight. He still only had one arm, and I could tell through his torn cloak that several chunks of flesh were missing from his body. I had to look away when he turned, because half of his face was missing.

Jane looked...dead. I reasoned how stupid that sounded since technically, she is quite dead, but the remaining hint of life that she did have was -- gone?

"Where are the others?" I didn't specify but Edward knew what I meant.

"Most of the covens and nomads are gone. Bella let the Quileutes know how to contact the rest of the tribe; they're off to bring them home."

I reached for Jake's hand, but he pulled it back hiding his thoughts. "Does...does Emily...?"

The silence that followed answered my question for me.

"You need to rest, Nay," Jake whispered, kissing my forehead.

"I'm fine. All healed." I looked down at my leg and saw only a scar. Then I looked up at my mother's beautiful features and saw the bite mark on her neck from Caius' attack. They would be our permanent reminders, and I wasn't sure if I liked that or not.

"I'm going to go to La Push tomorrow to--" Jake began, but I cut him off.

"_You're_ going? Don't you mean we?"

"Renesmee," he said sternly.

"You asked me to marry you, so you're stuck with me."

"Why do you have to be so damn stubborn?"

My parents tried to hide their smirks, but failed. A chuckle even escaped my dad's lips. "Get used to it kid," my dad patted Jacob on the back. "Like mother, like daughter."

My mom elbowed him and narrowed her eyes, but I was beaming.

"What are you going to do in Volterra?" I changed the subject, unable to keep my eyes off Jane and Marcus who were surrounded by the Denalis, Benjamin, and Gabriel. I saw off to the side that Tia and Élisabeth were standing with Audrey.

"Jane is not very responsive right now, but we're fine with them staying there. There are a few others that may or may not have heard of what happened here; Heidi and the wives for one. And we need to figure out what to do with Gianna."

"Can't she just stay human?" I had never met the human who worked for the Volturi, but I had heard the stories.

My dad and Carlisle were shaking their heads. Jasper, who seemed to appear out of no where began to speak. "The Volturi may have overstepped their boundaries, but we will still uphold the rules they put in place."

I sighed. "Keep the secret."

"Yes."

"So, Grandpa Charlie still can't know?"

"No. We need to set an example. It may be a bit chaotic for the next few decades. The Volturi ruled by fear, and until we can prove that it's not necessary, we may have random uprisings on our hands."

I wanted to cry. "More battles?"

"No. Not for our family at least," my mom said, smoothing down my hair. "There were enough witnesses here to know better than to go up against us."

"Don't you mean go up against _you?_" Emmett was in the room now with Esme, Rosalie and Alice.

"Against the Queen," I teased. Suddenly my heart jumped into my throat. "Wait, where's Ramses?"

Jake was rubbing my palm with his thumb. "He's here. Outside. He didn't want to leave without saying goodbye."

"Would it be alright if I did that now?"

Jake and my parents exchanged glances. "Fine," he finally agreed.

My legs were a bit shaky, most likely because I hadn't eaten in quite sometime, but I managed my way downstairs to the front yard without any help. Ramses was standing as still as a statue.

"How are you feeling?" he asked without looking at me.

"Why does everyone keep asking me that? I'm half-vampire. I'm fine."

One side of his mouth turned up into a smile.

"Are you going back to Egypt now?"

"Thanks to you, yes. I get to return home now."

"And do what?"

He finally turned to look at me. "Live forever, I suppose. Since I saw your prophecy so many centuries ago, I haven't seen anything, but perhaps another one will come to me and I'll yet again have a mission in life."

"Can you still visit? In my dreams, I mean?"

He nodded his head, content in thought. "I would enjoy a visit every now and then. It would be a great benefit to keep in touch with the ruling power, I am sure."

"Ruling...what?"

Ramses looked somewhat amused as he cocked his head.

Then the rest clicked. "The whole queen thing. Ruling power. We're in charge, aren't we?"

"It will be an enjoyable change of pace."

Paris appeared at the tree line and Ramses walked down the stairs to meet him. I looked down at the short, stocky man from the porch, trying not to cry.

"No tears, child. You and I have fulfilled our destiny together. The last thing that deserves is tears."

He nodded his head one last time before turning his back on me.

I leaned against the railing of the porch and watched the two men become nothing but shadows in the forest. Even long after they were gone I stood there, staring.

"So, is it hard to wrap your mind around?" my dad was next to me. "You're no longer the Prophet's Child."

"No, I still am. I always will be."

"How many titles can any one person have?"

"Titles?"

"Renesmee Black, for instance. I have to admit that will take a bit to get used to."

My heartbeat sped up at the implications of the name. "I'll always be Renesmee Cullen too though."

_Did you hear what Ramses said? About the ruling power? _I switched to my thoughts.

"I did."

_You don't want to say anything to Mom yet, right?_

"That is correct."

It was the one thing she always dreaded, and there was too much to sort out still for her to be caught up in those fears.

"How long will you be in Italy for?"

"Depends on how...cooperative the remaining guard is. A couple weeks at most."

"I need to go pack for tomorrow."

"About going to La Push..."

"Save it, Dad. I won't let Jake go through this alone."

He didn't stop me after that, and I retreated to my room to put a bag together.

I was fingering through dresses, trying to find _something _plain to wear to the funeral, when there was a knock behind me.

"Alice said you may need this." My mom was holding up a very modest black dress.

"Alice is right. Again."

"I wish I could be there. There is so much I owe to Sam...to the tribe."

"They understand how important it is for you to go to Italy."

Bella sat on my bed as I packed up a few sets of clothes, not saying much of anything.

"Where do you want to get married?"

Her question took me by surprise and I didn't have a good answer. We hadn't spoken about my engagement at all. "Uh, I haven't really had a chance to think about it. Do you think we could possibly do it in Forks? At the old house?"

"I think that's very possible."

I had seen pictures of my parents wedding, and had always secretly wanted mine to be just like it. Of course, back then I also wondered if I'd ever _get _married.

"It'll have to be just our family, won't it? Grandpa Charlie probably wouldn't fair so well."

A frown appeared on my mom's perfect face. "I wish he could, but I just don't know if he'll be able to...handle it. Carlisle and Esme, especially."

"We'll have to hide it then."

"We could have it at twilight, under the stars."

"With lots candles." I smiled at the hazy image coming into focus.

Again we went back to silence, both deep in our own thoughts. As I played back the last few days, I was reminded of one thing.

"What ultimatum did Aro give you?"

I could tell Bella was debating on what to say, looking from me to her hands and back again. "What I was afraid would happen. It didn't matter how powerful Aro was, he always knew you were my only weakness."

"What did he ask, though?"

"Join them, or lose you." She looked sick at just the memory of it.

"You did the right thing. If we were one of them, it would be like I was dead anyway."

"I knew what you would want. I couldn't be selfish and lock you in a world you hated."

"Yeah. But all that aside, he wouldn't have killed me."

"How are you so sure?"

I sat down on the bed next to her. "Because Aro's greatest weakness is his need to covet what he can't have. He wanted me for his collection, and I'd be no good to him dead."

"What are you two up to in here?" my dad interrupted, obviously happy to see us bonding again. "I apologize for the disruption, but we really need to head out, Bella."

There was so much more I wanted to talk about with my mom; catch up for all the months of silence I burdened her with, but it would have to wait--we had responsibilities.

Jake wanted to go to La Push on foot, but I didn't think that would be the best idea since my mom explained we would see Grandpa Charlie, so he reluctantly agreed to drive us.

As we pulled up to the reservation I felt the rock grow in my stomach. It wasn't deserted as it was the last time we ran off into the woods so many months ago, but you could feel death everywhere.

I clung to Jake as we walked into Paul and Rachel's house, having to let go when Rachel ran towards her brother and jumped into his arms.

Once she had pulled herself together, although there were still tears running down her cheeks, Jake took my hand again.

_I love you, _he said, squeezing me tightly. _We'll get through this._

Hours later we met up at the Clearwater's old house, where only Seth was living now. I finally got to hug Seth, Embry, and Quil, since they had all left before I had woken up. It was suddenly so wrong to be sitting at a different table, in a different kitchen. We had always gone to Sam's house.

Just as I was reminiscing I saw Emily come in holding Kaleb and I couldn't breath. Jake felt me tense up. _I want to be strong for her, Jake. _

_I know._

She let Kaleb run off with the other kids and walked right up to us. I was fine until she looked up at Jake, and the tears started to fall down her face. She was so little that when Jake hugged her, she seemed to disappear.

My eyes were red and puffy by the time she pulled away from Jake and hugged me. A whole new round of tears came.

I first thought I was getting warmer from all of the emotions, but then when I lifted my eyes up I noticed we were now surrounded by our friends in a tight circle. Kim held Emily's hand and grabbed onto my arm. Leah was holding onto both Seth and Jared. Paul, Embry, and Quil stood behind me, arms linked. Jake hadn't let go of me, and Rachel was under his other arm.

I'm not really sure how long we all stood there for, but I know it was silent. Kaleb, Billy Jr. and Tommy played quietly in the corner, and off in the distance I could hear murmurs from the neighboring houses, but there, among us, there were no words.

We sat around the living room, but conversations were hard to keep up. Jake explained the plans for Jane, Marcus, and the others. Most of the men thought they should have been killed, but at the same time understood why we needed to prove non-violence worked.

I left the kitchen where I was helping Kim and a newly arrived Laura, and Crystal, with food, when I heard the three little boys playing.

"Take that!" Kaleb said, pouncing at Tommy, barely avoiding the couch, but tripping over Jared's leg. He looked up at me with the eyes of his father. "Do you wanna play?"

"Well, what are you playing?" I knelt down to their level.

"Bad guys, good guys. I'm Quileute, and Tommy is a Vel-ter-ee and Billy doesn't get it but he's a Collin. Tommy is the bad guy."

I tried to decipher his mispronunciation but I couldn't. "What's a Vel-ter-ee and a Collin?"

He looked at me incredulously. "The vel-ter-ee live far away and are bad. The Collin come and help the Quileutes. Dad told me. He 'splained it all. Didn't you know?"

I inhaled desperately, trying to fend off new tears, but everyone had heard Kaleb's explanation, including his mother, and expressions made it impossible not to.

The _Volturi_ were the bad guys. The _Cullens _were the good guys.

"You don't need to cry," he patted my leg. "You can be a Collin. They're good."

Emily scooped the little boy up in her arms and hugged him tightly too her.

I looked over at Jake who was sitting on the couch. He had his eyes closed, but I could see a single droplet on his cheek.

I hoped then, that one day Kaleb would be able to be in on the secret and we could really tell him. Because I knew as he got older, kids would begin to tease him for believing in the superstitious legends his father told him as a little boy. I wanted him to know that they weren't just tall-tales. That his father was behind those legends, and that his father died a hero.

By the end of the night I was emotionally drained, and almost protested Jake's persistence to leave, until he reminded me tomorrow would be just as hard, if not harder.

I fell asleep the second my head hit the pillow. Hours later I realized I was alone in my bed, but not sure what had woken me up. Then I heard it.

A choir of howls. Soprano, bass, alto, all in a pained harmony, crying out for their lost brothers.

I walked over to the window and looked out into the darkness, and dotting each of the many cliffs which stood watch over the ocean, I could see the outline of the massive wolves, baying at the moon.

The clouds that had covered the night sky were evaporating in front of my very eyes, leaving a crystal clear night sky, each star brighter than the next.

"Nessie?" I heard a faint knock on my door and Rachel walked in and stood by me. "Wow. Look at that sky."

"Yeah. It remind me of a quote I once read, an Eskimo legend actually."

"How did it go?" she urged.

"_Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy._"

"That's a nice way to think about it."

"Do you think they're happy? Brad, Cooper, and especially Sam?"

"Yes," she said surely. The conversation ended there, and we watched the stars until Paul and Jake finally came home.

I remembered Billy Black's funeral from years ago, but it wasn't nearly as real as this one. They had three large pictures of Sam, Brad, and Cooper, and I couldn't pull my eyes away from them.

My mom had called Grandpa Charlie to give him the heads up that I was coming after all, and he surprised me with a huge hug, pulling me right off my feet.

For what felt like the millionth time, I cried yet again.

"Hey Kiddo, it's going to be fine," he promised, kissing me on the forehead. "We're already on the hunt for whatever beasts got Sam and those boys. I'm hoping those wolves that were around before you were born haven't come back."

It wasn't fair that no one could know what really happened. They deserved to be remembered as heros.

"Hey Nessie." I looked down to see Kaleb tugging on my dress. "I gots tissues. Need one?"

I accepted gladly, smiling at him. That's when I realized that Sam was a hero -- to the people who mattered the most.

Because there wasn't much to do back in Astoria, Jake and I stayed the rest of the week in La Push. My days were spent either in Forks with Grandpa Charlie or over at Emily's keeping her company with Rachel and Kim. I had become very close to them over the past year, which was a bond I never expected to have with any of the Quileute women, given our bloodlines.

Jake had a lot of official pack business to attend to I guess, which was never actually admitted out loud, but it's what I assumed because Sue was involved in it.

I could tell his hesitation on leaving as we said our goodbyes to everyone days later.

"You can stay if you need to, Jake. I can go back to Astoria. I swear it's--"

"Save it, Nay. I've already had this talk with Bella. I'm staying in Astoria. I'll visit more often, that's all."

"We'll visit more often," I corrected. "I want to stay in touch with Emily, and Kim, and your sister."

He put his hand on my thigh and rubbed it as he pulled out of the reservation. "I'd like that."

Even then as we left it seemed impossible that this was all real. I didn't know how many times at Emily's that week I expected to see Sam walk in whenever the door opened.

Learning to deal with this new reality I was living in was going to be a difficult. Already I could feel myself being tugged on in multiple directions, my mind and heart telling me to feel a whole mix of emotions. On one side we had lost many friends, including Sam, who I considered more as family. On the other side, we had completed our mission; I had completed _my _mission. Our world was a safer place now, because of us.

"Day dreaming over there?" Jake asked, waking me from my daze.

"No, just thinking really hard."

"A penny for your thoughts then?" He reached over and took my hand.

_You can have them for free, _I replied.


	27. Aftermath, Part II: Bella

All original Twilight characters are © Stephenie Meyer

**A/N: **Here's part two. Sorry for the delay, I've just been so stressed and busy I hadn't been in the right mind to write. I just want to warn everyone that there isn't going to be another sequel now before I get anyones hopes up. Chapter 20 is going to be a wrap up--all happy stuff--which I think you'll all get a kick out of, and then there's a epilogue to REALLY wrap things up.

This part is not as long as Part I, but I think it has enough substance to make it work.

**Chapter 19 - Aftermath (Part II)**

_Bella_

I might have been considered an all-powerful queen, but as we let Astoria and made our way south through the state, I realized I had no idea where we were going.

"Private jet at the Salem Airport," Edward explained.

"Oh, of course," I said sarcastically. "I'm sure they have their own fleet."

Edward only looked at me knowingly and nodded.

It was so odd to be only yards away from Jane and not feel any of the fear I used to. She only stared straight ahead and didn't speak a word to any of us, even Marcus. I couldn't bare to look at Marcus, who had been badly mauled. Edward almost told me who did it, but I stopped him; all I knew was that it was one of my family or friends, and I may never be able to look at them the same way again if he said their name.

I still had yet to spill any hypothetical blood in this immortal life of mine. My only job this time was to keep my shield up, and I couldn't be distracted from it. Even so, the entire battle my eyes were fixed on Renesmee, and it took every ounce of self control I had to let her fight on her own.

There were very few humans around by the time we reached the airport that evening, all of which were working on the large commercial jets that took up most of the small terminal. The oddest thing I'd ever seen was Jane and Marcus floating in their cloaks across the pavement in front of the men. Besides my family, it was the first time since meeting the Cullens that I had ever seen our world collide with that of mortals. The onlookers watched our parade of pale beauty march gracefully across the runway where a pilot was standing at the stairs of a mid-sized plane.

I caught a glimpse of the pilot's terrified eyes, noticing their hazel coloring.

"Is he like Gianna?" I asked Edward under my breath, knowing the human couldn't hear us.

"No. There are other scary people in the world, Bella. Private pilots are used to sketchy passengers."

Once in the plane I sat next to Gabriel, across the aisle from Edward and Benjamin. There were four other vampires who chose to go back to Europe with Jane and Marcus, and Carlisle insisted we out number them so Kate, Garrett, and Gabriel were with us as well.

I had already decided how I would pass the horrid fourteen hours we'd be spending in the air, which is why I chose to sit next to the Frenchman.

"I can't stop physical objects," I explained once we were in the air, "but since it's Gabriel's _mind _that is freezing the objects, why can't I block that?"

Kate turned around in her seat laughing. "Look at you. From nervous mortal at your wedding to our own miniature super hero."

I ignored her joke and pulled some old marbles Renesmee used to play with.

"Someone has been mulling over this idea," Edward commented, obviously amused.

It took two hours before I could keep Gabriel from freezing the marble. I let out a cheer when it finally worked, Gabriel on the other hand was not as pleased that his very powerful gift was thwarted.

Jane actually turned around and acknowledged us, overhearing my accomplishment and glared at me.

"She's just jealous," Edward said.

_It's so weird. I can't wrap my mind around the fact that it's Jane and Marcus, right there. After all these years..._

"You're telling me. It's been a decade for you, try a century."

_Do Marcus' wounds hurt? _I hated asking so many questions but even in eight years there was a lot I didn't know.

"Not once the burn of the venom subsides. I can't imagine it's very comfortable though."

"I thought you shielded Edward's ability from your thoughts?" Kate's head popped up from behind the seat. Our companions were getting annoyed with our semi-silent conversation.

"I can lowered my shield, just like I can expand it."

"Wow, you really do have the best of both worlds."

Testing my power against Gabriel only amused us for so long, and the ten remaining hours dragged by. It was the anxiousness of getting the last of this ordeal over with that made it so unbearable. The long trip to Alexandria wasn't even this tough.

By the time we landed in a tiny private airport south of Florence it was daylight. Without speaking Jane opened a closet and tossed us dark robes to put on.

"Just until we get into the cars," Edward promised.

stared down at the black cloth in my hands, and for the first time pictured Aro. I could only imagine the absolute delight he would take in finally see me and Edward donning the mark of the Volturi.

There were two jet black SUVs waiting only yards from the plane, the windows tinted so dark, they blended into the paint job.

"We'll have to separate," Edward said to me and Benjamin.

Edward ordered the four followers into one car with Gabriel, Kate, and Garrett, while Benjamin came with us, Jane and Marcus never farther than a yard from me. The idea of Jane had been so ingrained in me that it was awfully difficult to stay focused on my shield while she so casually sat a few feet from me.

The driver seemed surprised to see me climb into the front seat, but I smiled and nodded.

"Buongiorno signor, come state?"

He was definitely shocked when I spoke to him, and his reply was in between trembles. "Bene, grazie. E lei?"

"Bene!" Although "good" wasn't how I would describe my mood right then.

"When did you go and learn Italian?" Edward asked, leaning between the center console.

I pretended to think and just shrugged. "Have you keep you interested, don't I?" I said, referencing his reply to me when I found out he could speak Arabic.

My eyes were fixated out the darkened window, although in another part of my mind I was constantly checking on my shield that pulsed contently around Jane and Marcus.

"Your first time in Italy?" Benjamin asked, equally intrigued.

My eyes scanned the watercolor scenery of the Tuscan valley. "Actually, no," I said, shooting a look back at Edward. "But the first time I was a tad preoccupied."

Benjamin looked from me to my husband, but didn't probe any further into the suggestive nature of my answer.

I began getting a sinking feeling in my stomach as we pulled up to the great walls the surrounded Volterra. The SUVs glided much more easily over the cobbled streets in comparison to one very bright, very stolen sports car.

"How many will be at your..." It took me a moment before I realized that Edward was actually speaking to Jane.

Lair? Dungeon? Office? Castle?

Her disinterest was evident in the way she rolled her eyes.

"Thank you," Edward said, Jane's eyes narrowing. "Seven vampires, one human," he announced the the rest of us. "Servants, the wives, their bodyguards, and Heidi."

"Gianna?" I asked.

"Gianna hasn't been with us for...a while," Jane interjected, grinning darkly for the first time since the battle.

I thought back to the green eyed girl at the reception desk during my first visit and frowned.

_"Does she know they're going to kill her someday?"_

_"She knows it's a possibility," he said. "She's hoping they'll decide to keep her."_

_"She wants to be one of them?"_

I laughed at my own naivete.

The SUVs pulled around the back of the Volturi castle, under a conveniently placed awning,and two heavy wooden doors opened towards us the moment the cars stopped.

As I walked through the entryway, I was met by two almost identical dark-haired vampires standing inside a nondescript hallway. I stood there bewildered as they both lowered their heads to me, the same way I had seen other members of the guard do to the ancients.

"We are Damon and Luca. If we may serve you in--" the one began.

"Rise," Jane ordered, immediately angered that they showed me such respect.

The servants didn't move, though the one that spoke --Damon I assumed -- shifted his eyes up to Jane, and then over to me.

Edward was now standing besides me, looking down at the welcoming committee. "Rise," he said.

Jane's head hung low when they both did as Edward instructed them to do. Part of me felt as though I should be excited about this; that these beings already know what happened, but I wasn't. I didn't want to order anyone to do anything. Ever.

The elevator at the end of the hallway dinged and we stepped inside. There was nothing about these memories that was hazy.

The fancy lobby looked exactly as it had ten years ago, only they had replaced the once-green carpet with a dark violet berber.

"Welcome to Volterra," a light voice said behind the mahogany and marble counter. "I'm Becca, it is a pleasure to meet you."

I studied the fair-skinned human behind the desk. Her eyes were a grey-hazel, completely uninteresting, along with her stick straight out-of-the-bottle dirty blonde hair.

_Does she know she's about to die?_ I asked Edward.

He didn't recognize my question at all, but instead turned to the two vampires we met at the door. "Please gather the wives and any others holding residence here."

I had only seen the wives briefly during our first encounter in Forks, but they were shielded by both their cloaks and bodyguards.

"Would you like to go to your chambers, Master?" asked the remaining servant.

"They are not _my _chambers," Edward spat.

A sigh coming from across the room made me turn around, only to be confronted by a half-faced Marcus who was slouching down on one of the many leather couches. I don't think I had ever seen him look anything _but _disinterested, and the expression hadn't changed much. My face twitched automatically in response to eyeing his exposed cheek bone and mandible. I wondered with inappropriate curiosity how his eye was still intact.

Two women in dark long-sleeved dresses and grey robes walked timidly into the room followed by two men equally as large as Felix. I immediately took the defensive, but the bodyguards seemed to only be there because they had been ordered to be, not to protect anyone.

The women lowered their hoods. Finally, Sulpicia and Athenodora had faces to add to my endless memories. Athenodora had the fair hair, Carlisle had mentioned once in his stories of life in Volterra, while Sulpicia had dark hair.

I turned back again to Marcus who was without a wife, since Aro killed his love, Didyme, who was also Aro's sister. Marcus could have finally had the life he wanted outside of the Volturi, yet the one reason he wanted it so badly was now gone.

Heidi was the last to join the gathering in the lobby, looking extremely unhappy. She was glaring very directly at me, and as she did so I saw her violet eyes turn red as the venom ate away at the contacts she wore.

"I will spare you all the details, as you are already aware of the events which took place at our home." Edward's voice was low, yet firm. "We are not here to banish any of you out from Volterra, but we are here to dissolve any future plans to reconstitute the Volturi. Reside here if you wish, but the residents here no longer have the authority to take any matters in their own hands as far as our immortal race is concerned. You are a coven, and nothing more."

My jaw had dropped and it wasn't until Benjamin elbowed me did I take mind to close it. The words Edward was saying sounded...royal.

"W--W--What about me?" Becca had come out from behind her desk and was now only feet away from us. I found it odd that she stood among vampires so casually, until for the second time in an hour, I had to recognize how hypocritical that was of me.

"That would be up to the coven that resides here. We will not change any laws the Volturi put into place, so there are two options. We cannot have humans knowing of our existence."

Becca's face turned as pale as ours. Be turned, or be killed,she was probably thinking.

"Of course it would be the responsibility of those here to keep you in control during your newborn phase."

The room was silent and still, only Becca's faint heartbeat and some shallow breaths could be detected.

"Please understand, all of you that this is not what we wanted. We never wanted a confrontation or a battle. Power got the best of Aro, and for that we are disappointed. The Volturi lead our kind for a reason, but that is all in the past now. I will leave you all to your decisions, we will be staying until we feel we are no longer needed here."

The group dispersed, Gabriel and Benjamin asking to leave to hunt. At those words Marcus perked up for the first time.

"Please leave Volterra if you do," Edward told them. "I will not disrespect the wishes of the ancients."

Marcus closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh, but this time not one of boredom. When he opened them he looked towards Edward with an expression that almost said "Thank you."

"Jane, I would like to speak to you, privately if you will."

I went to follow him out of habit, but he raised a hand to me. I scrunched my brow and grimaced, only receiving an apologetic smile.

_You better tell me later, _I warned.

--

Edward never "got around" to telling me what happened during his and Jane's private conversation, but I kept telling myself he was just keeping it from our friends and the others that were around. We stayed in Volterra for only two more days, but not much progress was made; at least none that they would admit to us...out loud anyway.

On the last morning we would be there I wandered through the alleyways alone to find where I had been wanting to go for a while now.

It looked different now of course. The streets were not crowded with people cloaked in red. There was no cheering, no celebration. The sun was only just beginning to creep over the wall of the city to my right, and the dead streets made it safe for me to lean on the frame of the doorway to the clock tower.

I knew he was behind me before he spoke. "Seems like a different lifetime ago when we stood here last," Edward whispered.

I nodded, leaning back into him. "So many of my human memories are hazy, yet I can even remember the song they were playing as I ran through the crowd. I look out and still see that family who watched Felix and Demetri confront us."

"That's odd."

"Not really." I turned up and looked at him. "The second I saw you, everything made sense again. When I finally reached you, even though I knew I was as good as dead, I felt alive again; whole. It made an impression that not even a new life could change."

He squeezed me tightly and kissed the back of my head. "Are you ready to go home? See our daughter?"

"More than anything."

"Please tell me what's going to happen!" I asked eagerly as Garrett drove the SUV off towards the private airport.

Edward scooped me up closer to him, practically into his lap, and our friends around us turned, just as interested.

"I don't think they'll be sticking together," he began. "The power of the Volturi as a whole was the main reason for their large numbers. Those two bodyguards will most likely leave. The wives were quite panicked since they have never had to fend for themselves before, but those two servants seemed quite loyal to them. And even though Heidi played a rather superficial role, she is quite skilled. She wasn't thinking much, but I could see her going off on her own."

"What about Becca?"

Edward gave a crooked smile. "That actually surprised me. Jane was truly considering changing her. I believe more out of company than anything."

That bit of news made me rather happy, even if she ended up not following through.

"And Jane? Marcus?"

"You are very nosy today, do you know that?"

"Edward!"

"Alright, alright. Like I said, Jane wants company now. She's been surrounded for her entire existence. The four vampires we brought with us may join her also and make their own coven, but they were all undecided. Marcus on the other hand is as good as dead. I've never found a mind so completely void of thoughts as his was."

"And the castle? Will anyone stay?"

Edward shrugged. "That I don't know. Perhaps the wives and servants. Jane and Marcus may stay at first."

The clock tower was the last thing of Volterra I saw, before the tall stone walls blocking my view. I could see in my mind the way down the darkness and into the sewer. Then through the white hallway, up the elevator, and into the lobby. Continuing down a larger more decorated hall and to right there I could see a panel in the wall which moves to reveal a simple door. On the other side of it is a dreary antechamber which opens to a two story tall room. In this brightly lit room, with it's slender windows and stone floor, there are massive wooden thrones.

Those thrones had been the resting place for the greatest powers that had ever walked the face of this earth. And they would never be used again, for that power had been destroyed at our hand.

The legacy of the Volturi was over.


	28. Loose Ends

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

Bad author! Bad bad! It was hard to finish this. I was mentally drained after the big hyped up battle, and just the thought of finally coming to an end make it difficult to pick the right words. Then of course I thought FFnet was messing up, when in reality it was my computer. Took genius me over two days to just go use another computer. Yeah, I'm a quick one like that.

Make sure to read the author's note at the end of the chapter! Thanks for sticking through all of this with me!

**Chapter 20: Loose Ends**

**Bella**

"You're so jumpy," Edward pointed out. I hadn't noticed my leg was going a mile a minute. "Vampires aren't supposed to be jumpy."

"Well maybe I'm a bit more human than vampire right about now."

I really and truly thought I was going to hyper-ventilate when we turned down the oh-so-familiar road. Charlie's police cruiser was parked out front, next to Sue's sedan.

"Seems like yesterday...but yet another lifetime...at the same time. Does that even make sense?" I asked my husband as he put the car in park.

"Nope." He winked.

Jake and Nessie were already off their bikes, helmets in hand, when Charlie and Sue appeared at the front door.

My once uncoordinated legs ran by leaps until I was at the top of the stairs, meeting Charlie before he could even begin the descent.

Yes, I ran much too fast, but I was beyond caring.

"Whoa there, Bells! Maybe you should try out for the Olympics!"

I laughed into his plaid shirt, feeling the sting of faux tears in my venom-lined eyes. "I've just missed you so much," I choked.

"Missed you too."

I begrudgingly let go of my dad to say hi to Sue, who hooked arms with my porcelain skin and walked into the house.

She offered lemonade which Jake and Nessie accepted. My dad didn't even flinch when Edward and I shook our heads no.

I couldn't take my eyes off Charlie as we all settled in the living room. The grey in his hair was becoming much more prominent and my overly perceptive eyesight even saw a few growing in his mustache.

Part of me was constantly forgetting, no matter how many times I say it out loud, that it has been over a decade since I moved to Washington. Besides seeing Angela and Ben when I was in Port Angeles after Billy fell into a coma, Charlie and Sue were the only humans, aging humans, I had been around and known for more than a few years.

"Oh Bells, this came for you."

I looked down at the letter in Charlie's hand and took it cautiously. I recognized the script on the envelope immediately, without even having to double check it with the return address.

_Bella,_

_I realized I didn't have an address for you, and your e-mail address hasn't been working, so I thought sending this to Charlie would be the best bet. I'm sorry we've lost touch, please call me if you ever come back out west! I hope you don't mind that we stole your name, it's always stuck with me._

_Ang_

There was still something in the envelope, and I emptied the contents onto my lap.

Staring up at me was Angela, albeit an older more mature version of my high school friend, and in her arms was a tiny dark-haired wide eyed baby.

_Ashley Isabella Cheney_

I ran my fingers across both Angela and the baby. "She's...she's a mom."

Charlie grinned, wrinkles breaking out around his eyes and lips. "I had heard about it around town, but wanted to give her a chance to tell you."

I flipped through copies of the other pictures, ones of her, the baby, and Ben.

Renesmee came and sat on the couch with me, looking over the pictures.

"She's beautiful."

The baby was beautiful, but it was Angela I was stuck on. She was only a couple years shy of thirty, and the maturity in her features was crystal clear. It also made it clear to me that she was going to be out of my life now.

Edward kissed the top of my head. "I'm sorry," he whispered below human hearing.

It was what I knew would happen though, so it shouldn't be such a heartbreak. She and Ben would raise their children, live a long life together, get older, and they would die. The inevitability of a mortal life was shockingly simple.

"Have you spoken to the boys? It's been a while since you've seen them, hasn't it?" Charlie asked Jake, who had been sitting closely to Nessie the entire time.

"They were actually just down to visit us a month ago." That was a lie. It had several months since Sam's funeral, and Jake had taken multiple trips up to La Push already. He knew though that Charlie would be awfully offended if he knew that. "But we'll make sure to hang out, of course."

"I haven't been up there in a while. How are they? How's Emily?"

"Um, as good as could be expected, I guess. She has a lot of support."

"I wish we could have caught that monster who attacked Sam and those boys. It is a constant thorn in my side."

Poor Charlie. Little did he know he was chasing a ghost...if a vampire can even be a ghost.

I looked up and caught him staring at me the same way Edward looks at Alice when she's trying to keep him out of her mind and he wants in.

"Well, I should help Sue in the kitchen."

After dinner was over we all retired to the living room, Sue pulling out a cot which was way too small for Jake, but she pushed it against the armchair to add on a few more inches.

"Can we go for a walk, Bells?" My dad leaned on the door frame of the living room entry. "Some father-daughter time?"

Edward squeezed me tightly, and when I looked up at my adonis it was obvious that something in Charlie's thoughts was upsetting him.

We walked down the street in silence at first, since neither Charlie nor I were ever the best conversationalists. Immortality hadn't changed me that much.

"I know I've always said I didn't want to know anything that wasn't necessary," he finally said, but paused and looked to the ground.

"Dad..."

"I need to know Bella. I need to know a little more at least."

Even though it had been decided we had to stay true to the whole keep the secret motto, I reasoned with myself that I could at least bend those rules now. Edward would be the only one who would know, and what was he going to do? Send Jane after me and Charlie?

"All right."

"You're-" his voice faltered something horrible "-you're still eighteen, aren't you?"

I was stunned for a moment, not expecting Charlie to be so straight forward.

"I am."

"Will you always be eighteen?"

"Yes."

"And Nessie?"

"She's around eighteen now, and she'll stay that way as well."

He scratched his chin, the way he did when he was deep in thought. "Okay." He paused then started again. "Do Carlisle and Esme...Alice..."

"They all look the same."

"Will Jake stay...?"

"Yes...but in a different way." The last thing I wanted to get into was how Jake had the choice to age.

"Don't get offended by this, but are Jake and Nessie, you know?"

My insides dropped to my feet. Holy crow. "Are you sure you want to hear this stuff?"

"I want to be in your lives for as long as possible, Bella. I had the worst feeling the past year that you were all in trouble. It's silly, but I thought I was going to lose you."

Charlie's fatherly intuition served him well, but I didn't want to go there either.

"They are. They're engaged, actually."

"Oh, wow. Okay."

We walked along for a while longer, turning down the road that would take us back around to the house.

"So you're going to live...forever? All of you?" Back on the age topic.

"Yes."

"And leave your old man out of it?"

"You don't want this Dad." I reached out and took his hand in my icy grasp to prove my point. We both stared down at them, my sturdy colorless skin next to the soft sun-kissed freckles of his. "This, this was for Edward, so we could have a life together. It was the only way for us. But if you're able to handle it, you can be in it for as long as you want to be."

"I can handle it," he said stiffly. "I will. If that's what it takes."

"That makes me very happy." I squeezed his hand gently, and he squeezed back.

He looked at me and I could tell he was thinking again. "What about the eyes, Bells?"

"Uh...part of the package deal. Pretty, huh?"

"Sure. Pretty. Yeah."

We were standing outside the house now, again in silence. "There's one more thing Bella...and it goes hand in hand with that feeling I had been getting."

I waited for him to compose himself, terrified he was going to just blurt out the word vampire and then I really wouldn't know what to do.

"Sam and those boys weren't killed by an animal, were they?"

"No." I exhaled, only half relieved to hear his question.

"You were there when they died."

"Yes."

"But everything is okay now?" I swore I could see the new wrinkles appear on Charlie's forehead the longer the conversation got.

"Everything is more than okay, which is why we wanted to make the trip up here."

"That's...that's good."

Charlie must have looked as white as me when we walked into the house, because Sue fluttered to his side and gave me a look. It wasn't one of anger or accusation, just knowing.

That night after Charlie and Sue had gone to sleep, Nessie tip toed into my old bedroom where Edward was fiddling on a laptop and I was reading.

"What happened with Grandpa?"

Edward and I hadn't even spoken about it, although it was clear he knew everything.

"He asked some more...detailed questions."

"I thought you said he couldn't know. Keep the Secret and all."

"He simply knows we won't age. He knows Sam, Cooper, and Brad weren't killed by an animal. He knows that you and Jake are engaged."

"He does?" Her tone went up a little too high and we all stilled, waiting to hear something from Sue and Charlie's room.

When the rest of the house, minus Jake's snoring down

stairs, remained quiet, Nessie continued.

"Does that mean he can come to my wedding?"

Wedding. Ugh. Years later and it still made me feel sick inside. "Yes Renesmee, it does."

It did bring up old memories for me, thinking back on how much I hated Alice for forcing me to include my parents, and how awfully grateful I am for it now.

I could say the rest of the visit was uneventful, but that wasn't so. Now that Charlie knew just a little bit more, I could tell he was paying much closer attention to everything we did. Twice he tried to get us to go outside with him on a sunny day, and after we turned him down twice, Edward said his mind was so boggled with ideas it was giving him a headache. He never did hit the nail on the head though.

"Do you think you would have figured it out on your own?" Edward asked me when we were alone. Nessie and Jake had taken off to La Push, and Charlie and Sue were out on errands. "Jake was the one who ultimately told you."

"Not sure. You know you would have told me eventually though."

He gave me a crooked smile. "Probably."

It was obvious the house was a little less tense with secrets after my talk with Charlie. We could all be ourselves just a little bit more.

Then, too soon as always, it was time to go.

I reached my hands out the open car window while Edward threw the bags in the trunk and Charlie met me half way.

"Oh, look at the sun coming out," Edward said, climbing into the car and turning the engine over.

The motorcycles engines were already revving. I was sure both Jake and Nessie wanted to know what devil's dance I was playing with the clouds disappearing so quickly in the sky. Edward waved to them, signally them to head out before us.

"Love you, Bells." Charlie grinned at me with his chocolate-brown eyes.

"Love you too, Dad."

We were still holding hands as Edward put the car in reverse, and slowly backed out of the driveway. The sun finally broke through the clouds and trees, the light scattering like crystals across the back of my hand.

Charlie stared wide eyed at the diamonds he was now holding, and brushed his fingers across them gently. He gave me one last squeeze before letting go.

Neither Edward nor I said anything about what had just happened. Instead, I stared out the window, watching the endless trees lining the road, and couldn't help but remember my first impression, now hazy with immortality.

_It was beautiful, of course; I couldn't deny that. Everything was green: the trees, their trunks covered with moss, their branches hanging with a canopy of it, the ground covered with ferns. Even the air filtered down greenly through the leaves._

In the state of Washington, on the very end of the Olympic Peninsula, there's a small town named Forks. It was here I exiled myself almost eleven years ago, as a martyr for my mother's happiness. Little did I know, this inconsequential alien-like place would end up holding _my_ entire life's happiness under it's cloud-covered skies.

My lips turned up into a slight smile as we passed the old metal sign, _Thank you for visiting Forks!_

Edward smiled down at me. "We'll be back soon enough."

**Edward**

A few more weeks went by after our return from Forks before Bella and I finally told Carlisle about Charlie's confrontation and how much he knew now. My father looked mainly at Bella, even though I was doing most of the talking, and he kept right on staring even after I was done.

"All right."

"Didn't we break the rules?" Bella asked, her voice almost quivering.

"I'm not sure if a queen can break her own rules," he said, winking at her.

It had become the running joke in the family, and it was definitely wearing on Bella's nerves.

Carlisle put an arm around her shoulder and smile. "I don't believe Charlie will be running to any news stations claiming his daughter sparkles in the sun. And if this means you can have your father in your life for that much longer, then I think it's just fine."

Both of us exhaled a sigh of relief.

"I don't think it would be wise to mention this to anyone outside of our family though."

"No, no, definitely not," Bella promised, taking my hand and leading me back downstairs.

I heard Nessie and Jake come out of her room, trying my hardest to block out their lovey-dovey thoughts. It made me extremely happy when I found out Esme was going to soon offer them the second house she had restored during the battle.

Alice was sitting in the living room alone, thinking mindlessly about Rosalie and Emmett. _Esme is going to be so happy!_ She made eye contact with me as she said it, knowing I had been listening. _Don't tell anyone yet though._

Nessie had brought a plate of food over to the couch and sat next to Alice. Jake walked through the room to plant a kiss on her head. "I'll be home tonight."

_He doesn't even need to work. We have plenty of money._ Nessie whined, but quickly looked up at me sheepishly. Little did she know, Jake was dead set on saving up for a ring, something he wanted to do all on his own.

I walked off to the sitting room which held my piano, something I finally felt I could play again. I had been so held down by everything; the Volturi, my daughter, the prophecy, I knew it had been doing a number on my melodies.

"Can you see anything about me?" I heard Nessie ask Alice once Jake was long gone.

"I can see things you're involved with. If you're talking to Bella, then I can see Bella." Nessie responded with a huffed. "I'm trying my hardest here, Nessie! Swear!"

Through Alice's thoughts I could see Nessie frown, so my fingers switched keys and began playing a song I had written for her when she was a baby. I watched as her eyes got brighter in recognition.

"It's not that," Nessie said. "I was just wondering if you could see something like...I don't know...a wedding?"

In all the ways she was like her mother, this wasn't one of them.

"Not yet, but I'm sure I'll see reactions from the others, so there will be plenty of time to plan."

"You'll help me, right Alice?"

My tiny sister squealed ten times higher than any human could hear and everyone in the house groaned.

"Oh, yes, Nessie! Yes! Do you know what you want yet? Besides being in Forks that is, I know all about that! How about your dress? You would look amazing in a strapless dress! Maybe with a sweetheart neckline?"

I heard Bella walk through the living room and chuckled. "You're so done for."

"Some people enjoy celebrations and weddings," Alice shot back. Then I saw a light bulb go off in her head, causing me to groan for a different reason.

"Seriously, Alice?"

"Shush!" she called out to me, jumping to her feet. "As I was thinking, we should go shopping!"

Nessie pulled Alice back down to a sitting position. "Wait, Alice, for the wedding? That may be jumping the gun a little bit."

"Oh I know that, but think of it, when was the last time we got to go shopping? It's been forever!"

My fingers switched songs again and the music was now more like Alice; quick, soprano and light. "I hope our bank accounts can afford all of your back logged shopping trips," I muttered.

"They're doing just fine!"

"Shopping sounds cool." Nessie shrugged nonchalantly, but I knew she was just as much of a shopaholic as Alice was.

"How about the Mall of America!"

"Uh, Minneapolis is just a little too far for me today. How about we stay in the area for now?" Nessie suggested. "Portland works."

Alice pouted and sighed. "Well, there is a Saks there...so I guess for now..."

"You owe me a big trip anyway, remember? My birthday two years ago."

"Oh that's right! Oh, wait we can get you presents!"

My cell phone buzzed from my pocket. "Hey, hold on."

No one was really paying attention to me, even when the music stopped, so no one noticed me slip out the window and into the woods.

"Sorry," I said into the phone. "Alice is attempting to keep this a surprise."

Emmett laughed from the other line. "Not likely. As I was saying, we should be there early Monday morning, before sunrise."

"And Rose is sure about this?" As I continued my conversation, part of my mind was checking the house to make sure no one was eavesdropping.

"Hey man, it was her idea. She was all worried no one wanted her back, especially Jake and Nessie."

"I think we've all gotten a new taste of what family is. We all need to learn Rosalie in our own way, Nessie just hasn't gotten there yet."

"Yeah, yeah." Emmett's attention span was limited, although it had no reason to be. "I'll see you in a couple days."

I was laughing to myself as I walked back into the house. The first thoughts I caught were bitter complaints from Alice. _I told you I wanted it to be a secret! _Esme and Nessie were now lined up looking at me for an explanation to the phone call.

"Oops. Whatever, Alice, it couldn't be kept a secret for too long."

"So they're really coming home?" Esme had her hands over her mouth and was sobbing.

"Emmet said that they'll be here before sunrise on Monday."

Esme was clapping her hands, rushing off with a mental list of things to do, while Nessie's thoughts were not as cheery. _Great, just in time for us to come back from La Push. _

Attempting to look as unamused as possible, she took her seat on the couch again, reaching for the television remote. I knew she was concentrating way too hard on the sitcom, filling her head with the dialogue in an effort to keep me out.

_What? _she finally asked, looking up at me.

Her deep chocolate-brown eyes were taking me back to another time and place, and I allowed myself to get lost there.

She was still waiting for an answer a second later, but I decided to pick my battles and just shook my head as I walked off.

I let myself into Bella's studio, and found my Venus packing away all her brushes and paints.

"Retiring already?"

She took a canvas in her hand, looking at it critically before placing on top of a stack.

"I kind of got bored with it. I wasn't very good," she admitted. "I heard the news. The whole family, together again."

"As it should be, faults and all."

I leaned over Bella's shoulder and ran my nose across the thin skin of her throat.

She tilted her head back and gave me a sly smile. "You have to miss it sometimes." I knew exactly what she was referring to.

"The scent? Perhaps. The desire to kill you? Not so much." I kissed up her neck to her ear, snaking my hands around her waist and turning her to me. "I just have to dip into my memories if I ever need a reminder."

I took her head between my hands and concentrated on her amber eyes. "It really is amazing."

"What is?"

"Your eyes were the first thing that truly drew me to you. The depth of them. How much they said without saying anything. I never had to bother reading anyone before you. And then I see our daughter, and whether I can read her mind or not, it's still there."

"Do you think if I wasn't a shield, you still would have become so infatuated with me? It was your curiosity that got the best of you in the beginning."

"After everything we've gone through the past few years, you really think that you and I crossing paths was purely a coincidence? The fact that you could smell blood from a distance? That it was only by chance you were born with a latent immortal ability? Or how on earth you moved to the tiniest town that was home to one of only two vegetarian covens in the world?"

I expected Bella to think over what I said, but instead she grinned. "Why Edward Cullen, could be it after ninety-eight years you finally believe in a greater being?"

Bella and Carlisle believed in a life after this one, even for us. "I didn't say-"

"If there wasn't something or someone to create this destiny for us, wouldn't that mean it is just a coincidence?"

I mulled over her point and finally nodded. "I guess you're right."

"Mom? Dad?" Nessie interrupted without consideration for our privacy and immediately regretted it. Ew, gross. "Esme, Alice and I are going into Portland to shop." She turned her attention towards Bella. "I'd ask you if you wanted to come but-"

Bella's laugh was similar to sweet bells during Christmas. "But you know me well enough. Have fun."

"Be back tonight!"

My mind refocused on Bella, who was still in my arms. I took my thumb across her cheek and she tried to hide a smile.

"I sometimes still expect to see them go all pink," I whispered, kissing her non-existent blush.

"Don't worry, you still dazzle me, blushing or not." She stopped and bit down on her lip, the simple gesture that used to drive me crazy. "Your eyes."

I knew they had darkened some, I had been putting off hunting for too long. "I think we're all going to go tonight. Will you come?"

"I think I'll wait for Alice and Nessie. You go have a boy's night."

She looked at me again with those telling eyes. I could see right through them, able to pull up the feelings and memories I only found since she had come into my life.

As if she knew what I was doing, Bella opened her mind to me and we stood there reliving every second of our existence together. The very last image took me by surprise. It was just us, standing in the cottage together, in each others arms. I cocked my head sideways and looked at her for an explanation.

_It's our perfect piece of forever._

**Jacob**

The house was quite as I pulled up on my bike that night. I knew Nessie was out shopping, she had called me to let me know, just in case. I wasn't sure what exactly she was expecting to happen and why being in Portland would be significant, but I just told her to have fun. It was all so new to me still - the whole true love thing - I wasn't sure if I always acting correctly.

Bella was in the living room alone when I walked in.

"Wow, this is a first."

"Boys are hunting, girls are shopping."

"Neither for you?"

She put the history documentary she was watching on mute to give me her full attention.

"Having alone time here is rare. I take advantage of it whenever possible."

"Am I...?" I wasn't sure if I was missing a subtle hint.

"No, no, don't be crazy Jake. Sit!"

She went back to watching the television show, and I caught up surprisingly fast. It was some tragic medieval story about a queen and the man she couldn't marry. It eventually got me thinking, this would probably be the only time I could really talk to her about what was on my mind without being interrupted.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I blurted out.

The wind had kicked up through the open window, but the vampire scent that I had been born to be repulsed by was now no different than the smell of air on a humid day; just a little muggy and stale. I figured people in Florida have to live like that all year round too. No biggie.

"Do I even want to know what you're apologizing for?"

I wasn't sure myself exactly, or at least not how to word it quite right.

"I told you I'd never leave you, and I did."

Bella's porcelain face read absolute horror as the words left my mouth. "How can you say that, Jacob?" She didn't really need to gasp for the air she was pulling through her lips, she was just being dramatic. "You never left me even after everything I put you through. Everything! I should be apologizing to you if anything."

I shook my head and swallowed hard. "Well, I know...I know that when Edward left I got some weird hypothetical piece of you. I know that's why he eventually gave in and let me stay in your life. I also know that when Renesmee was born and-" even now it was impossible to use the word "imprint" in front of Bella "-uh everything happened, we drifted because the center of my world changed. But I was still responsible for part of you."

She looked at me skeptically.

"I heard you and Alice talking," I admitted. "About what you realized the day Nay found out about us."

"It was something I needed to get over on my own. You still have nothing to apologize for, Jake."

"Maybe I don't." I smiled. "But there is one thing I wanted to tell you to...help. Help as much as I can at least."

"And what's that?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"You can have your Jacob back. The original Jacob. The one that you used to build bikes and drink warm sodas out of brown paper bags with. Before the werewolf thing, and the vampire thing, and daughter thing - all of the things that changed it in the first place."

"Like when it was as easy as breathing," she said softly, her voice seeming far off.

I had flashbacks of another lifetime. One that involved conversation hearts and promises of servitude. When mechanical knowledge and cooking skills decided your age. When secrets from our parents and plans of cliff diving were routine.

"There are no secrets anymore... at least none that I'm aware of." I eyed her in fake accusation, and she shook her head grinning. "There will be no more tip toeing around lies. We don't need to hide from each other, because that's what we've doing all this time. We were afraid of the present finding out about the past." I knew I was rambling now, and took a deep breath. "I just want you to know that it's all where it's supposed to be now. For real."

"When did you get so wise, Jake?"

"When I started hanging around a bunch of know-it-all vampires, I guess," I said smugly.

She rolled her eyes at me, a very Bella thing to do. "I'm going to have to fight my daughter for your attention if that's the case."

"No, you won't." I wagged a finger at her. "I've decided to go against the werewolf grain-"

"That's a shock," she teased.

"As I was saying, I'm not playing by all the rules. If I'm supposedly in charge of part of you, then it's only fair that it goes both ways. Renesmee has plenty, she can spare a little bitty piece."

Vampires may be fast, but my movements were unsuspected, and before Bella could react she was looking down at what was in her hand. At first I didn't think she liked it, the way she was staring at it.

"Jake..."

"It's just something stupid. Ya know, trying for the whole nostalgia thing. I know you wore the other one to pieces. So, well, yeah."

I saw her lift her hand, and take the tiny wooden wolf between her fingers, fingers that could easily turn it into sawdust. Gently, she closed her fist around it instead.

She was blinking rapidly. I figured out after being around her for so long that meant she would be crying, if she could.

"So, you're still my best man?"

"Sure, sure," I replied nonchalantly. "I've stuck around this long, what's another millennia or two?"

"Only one or two?" Her voice had lightened and she already had the charm on the bracelet next to Edward's diamond heart.

I only smirked back at her.

"We didn't have any choice either, did we?" she asked randomly. I gave her an_ explain yourself or I'll think you've gone crazy_ look from the corner of my eye, making her laugh. "I always said that Edward was it for me. And for you and Renesmee, it's the same thing. But you and I...we never had a choice either. Best friends forever."

Maybe all of the talks about true love, fate, and destiny were starting to screw with me, but as Bella said those last three words, just a little bit more of a smile showed up in her eyes. Maybe I had helped. Maybe that was the piece of her I had. Maybe I had given it back.

No, we played for keeps, I decided. I just showed her that I still had it, that I've had it this entire time, and that I always will.

"Best friends forever," I nodded. And I had to admit, the word forever was growing on me.

Bella and I spent all night sitting on the couch talking about absolutely nothing important. Once or twice I found myself closing my eyes and almost able to smell the musty makeshift garage and the sea-scented air of First Beach.

We did get into another age debate, her arguably winning because she had the ability to block evil vampires (and her nosy husband) from people's minds. It was dark by the time both the shopping and hunting parties got back and the looks we received across the board were definitely questioning the odd and happy tones to our laughter and our close proximity to each other.

Renesmee came and sat on my lap, kissing me before she had even come to a stop. It never ceased to amaze me how absolutely whole I felt when we were together. I saw both Bella and Edward look mindlessly away when we held the kiss just a little longer than usual.

Edward had come up behind the couch and pulled Bella up so she was sitting on top of it, his arms wrapped tightly. I saw her look up at him and smile before she kissed him. It's when I knew I wasn't crazy. He stared at her for a second longer and then met my gaze.

_I've got it covered_, I said to him silently.

He had pulled Bella to his chest so she couldn't see his face, but he closed his eyes and gave me one firm nod.

Renesmee had demanded my attention back, explaining that the purchases for both herself and me, but got distracted when Jasper scooped up Alice and she squealed.

They were now sitting in one arm chair, Alice pretty much on top of Jasper, and the way they looked at each other made me wonder whether or not they had some kind of psychic communication too sometimes. I heard Carlisle and Esme in the kitchen whispering about finishing the second house for the newlyweds. Bella had slid back down to the couch next to me, her ice cold hand so close to mine that I could feel the frosty air around it. Edward sat on the ground by her knees, leaning back as she ran her other hand through his hair. And I sat with my Renesmee, prepared to never let her go.

_What are you thinking about? Your thoughts are going a mile a minute,_ Renesmee asked. I hadn't realized how far my mind had wandered.

_Forever._

_What about it?_

_Just that it sounds pretty damn good right about now._

**Renesmee**

I didn't pester Jake with questions as he rode off in the direction of the one-oh-one. It was one of the prettiest rides ever being that it hugged the coastline of the Columbia River. It was sunny and I took the chance to not wear my helmet-the roads in the area were practically void of all law enforcement, made up of state parks and unclaimed forest. It was so bright; I didn't remember things being so bright before. It was almost as if I had had a permanent shadow over my world since finding out the Volturi's decision... and it was gone now.

It had been eight months since the battle, and life was something I had never really experienced before. It was normal. Well, as normal as it could be.

Jake had promised me as we left La Push that day-one of the many trips we had been taking to visit the tribe- that we weren't going to Astoria right away. The one-oh-one followed the bridge that connected Washington and Oregon and the four-oh-one took over, going the opposite direction of home. We were soon driving away from the coast, into the dense forest of dirt roads that wouldn't be found on any normal map. The sun was almost completely shielding us; only flickers of white light made it through the trees. Our engines were the only signs of human life for miles, the rest were the rustling off the leaves as we whipped up the wind driving by, the scurrying of small animals and insects disturbed by our noise.

It didn't take me long to realize we were heading once again back towards the Columbia, having to take a ridiculous roundabout way to get wherever Jake was taking me. I was about to speed up to ask him where we were going when the road stopped.

I followed his lead and put up the kickstand of my bike, taking the hand that was out stretched to me.

"Jake?"

He turned but didn't speak. His eyes said enough. Patience, they were saying.

We went through some dense woods and met the coast on the other side. There was no shore there; the earth just dropped off into the water with no warning.

Jake took me to the very edge and positioned me in front of him.

"Jake, please, what are we doing?"

He smirked at me and shook his head. Still not saying or thinking anything he took my arm and extended it out and made my finger point straight ahead.

The day was clear enough that I could see it. Oregon. More specifically, Tongue Point.

I was on the other side.

"It's over, Nay," he finally whispered. "So here we are, like you said we'd be. We're here, and that's all in the past."

My arm was shaking but a part of me couldn't bare to lower it. I felt the shaking go through my body and end in my eyes as tears dripped down them.

"Nay? What's wrong?"

I shuttered and turned to cling to him. "It won't ever be the past for some. Like Emily. She can't leave it in the past. It's her forever. Emily has to wake up everyday without Sam. Everyday for the rest of her life."

Jake didn't say anything for a minute. I could tell by the careful breathes he was taking, he was trying to stay composed. "Emily knows why Sam did it. She knows he died doing something he believed in. We're the protectors remember? We may not have been born to protect vampires, but that changed and so our duties changed. We're here to protect good, and your family is one of the most purest forms of good I know."

"I just can't imagine living without you. I don't know how she can go on."

"Renesmee, look at me," he pleaded, but I couldn't. He took my face in his hands and forced me. "She will because it's what Sam would want her to do. She will live the rest of her life for him. She will - we all will - make sure that Kaleb knows how brave his father was, what a leader he was. Sam will never be forgotten."

Silence took over and I stared at him for what seemed like several minutes until he spoke again. "And you will never have to live without me. I am going to marry you, and we will spend an eternity together."

I turned back towards Oregon and looked at my past. "I feel like I'm cheating some system. I feel like I shouldn't have all of this."

"You've been cheated out of enough the past nine years."

"And now it's over," I qualified yet again.

"It's finally over."

Life. Love. Destiny. Fate.

It was a lot to learn in only nine years, and much too much to take in all at once.

"Let's go home."

We didn't get back to Astoria until dusk, and I was surprised to see Marcus Collins' car in our driveway.

"Oh thank God!" Grace jumped out of the car and met me and Jake at the garage. "I didn't want to just leave this with your family.

"Grace, what are you doing here?"

"Well, since you're finishing up school at home, I haven't gotten to see you and I didn't want you to think I had forgotten..."

I looked down at her hands and she held up a gift bag in excitement. She remembered my birthday. My ninth birthday.

"I made you this. Eighteen is a big deal!"

I was the princess of a world she could never know existed, so to her I was just Renesmee, her friend whom she had missed.

I pulled from the bag a small photo album of my sweet sixteen. "Oh, wow this is great."

"It's outdated, but I just didn't have anything recent. We'll need to make sure to update it!" Marcus impatiently honked the horn, and waved to Grace to hurry up. "Sorry about that, we're going to be late for a movie! We'll make plans next week!"

Since my schedule was cleared of all prophecies and battles with evil vampires, I agreed. "Next week. Definitely."

Jake and I walked back into the house, my family sitting quietly together in the living room.

"That's very nice of Grace," my dad said, looking over my shoulder.

I nodded, running my fingers over the pages of me in my black dress, everyone else in white. Dancing with my dad, dancing with Jake.

Two years ago I didn't know that Jake was my soul mate. I didn't know that my destiny was connected to the man who haunted my dreams. I didn't know the fate of so many lives rested on my family. On my mother. On me.

I hadn't realized I had fallen asleep on Jake in the living room, until the far off sound of a truck hit our dirt road.

"They're here!" I heard Alice say, as I lifted myself from the fog of sleep.

We all walked out to the porch, the headlights finally reflecting off the windows of the house. Emmett honked the horn as he pulled up in front of us, disturbing the darkness of early morning.

"My family is together again," I heard Esme whisper, her hands gripping onto Carlisle's shirt so tightly I was positive it was about to rip.

"We're baaaccck!" Emmett jumped from the driver's side door and straight over the hood.

"It's like you've never left," my mom taunted.

Emmett took the stairs in one leap and was flinging me around before I could blink. "Hey Squirt! Happy birthday! Almost at the double digits, huh?"

"Uh huh," I said, while trying to catch my breath. "And now you've just made it the best birthday ever."

"Just another one of hundreds, right? Wait no, thousands!"

My mind had wandered back to that afternoon, standing at the end of the river with Jake. It's finally over. But that seemed wrong now.

"Hey are you guys going to help or what?" Rose called from the truck.

I followed Jake down the stairs. On the last step he swung me around and surprised me with a long kiss. "Love you," he whispered.

"Enough you two," Edward shouted, but he was smiling at the same time.

"Oh leave them be," my mom said, easily tossing a chair out of the truck and in his direction. "Now let's get this done. I'm looking forward to movie night."

"Don't you mean morning?" Jake teased.

My mom stuck her tongue out at him, and everyone laughed.

No, nothing was over.

This was only the beginning.

The point of this chapter was to tie up some loose ends. There were two things I truly needed to be tied up in a nice bow, one being Charlie's future with his daughter, the other being Bella and Jake's relationship. I felt that Jacob needed some say in this story, and I had desperately been wanting to hear what he had to say about his love for Renesmee. I threw Edward in there because he had been a major narrator, and in this chapter he gave an insight into what their lives were going back to-normal. And of course I wanted to end with Renesmee and show that she found her final piece of clarity.

The epilogue will be posted on Sunday night. It's not a chapter, but a broad look into their future. I tell everyone this because I don't want anyone to get their hopes up.


	29. The Never Ending Story: Epilogue

**All characters © Stephenie Meyer**

The main A/N is at the bottom, but I just wanted to say quickly that this epilogue was pretty much out my own selfish need of a REAL end. Some may like it, some may not...but it was something I really had to write.

--

**Epilogue: The Never Ending Story**

And that's her story.

Our story.

Life was a little hectic after the battle as we tried to reorganize our secret world which lost it's ruling power. The battle was eventually given a catchy name--the Great War--which I thought was very cliché, but Edward laughed and told me it could be worse.

Soon after our return from Italy, Edward and Carlisle had explained to our entire family the private conversation my husband had with Jane in Volterra. Edward offered her the opportunity to keep the role as enforcer of the law. She would not be able to make decisions on her own, but at least this way her torment and anger wouldn't be misplaced. I knew that wasn't the only reason of course. Immortals were, as Edward described our kind so many years ago, monsters, and these monsters needed someone to fear. Our family may have won the so-called Great War, but we were not the violent type. We couldn't go around offing vampires for breaking the rules. Jane was necessary in order for us to keep our humanity intact.

One thing I did noticed though was that Jane was never the same. When I voiced my opinion to Edward, he explained it was because of Alec. Her heart may have iced over many centuries ago, but her twin had been there long before. His memory haunted her every thought, and when we would cross paths--routine work whenever needed--I could see in her eyes that there was a part of her that died with him.

Then there was Marcus, who was so maimed in the battle he went into solitude somewhere in Russia. We only heard him mentioned every few decades, and eventually he became only but a name mentioned in stories.

Renesmee and Jacob waited three more years before they finally married. It was small, of course, but perfect. Everyone we loved was there, including Charlie. Kaleb, by then seven years old, stood as one of Jacob's groomsmen, in place of his father.

Soon after Renesmee's actual eighteenth birthday, they gave me and Edward a grandson -- EJ. Edward Jacob. Unlike the little boy in my dreams, he held no vampire characteristics and the werewolf gene was triggered when he was fourteen. He had his father's jet black hair and his mother's deep chocolate brown eyes. My brown eyes.

War World III broke out several decades after the Volturi lost power. When the war was finally over, human civilization had been sent back a couple hundred years due to the mass destruction from the nuclear bombs, and I finally got a dose of the world Carlisle had lived in.

Although the residual radiation from the nuclear bombs dissipated a century ago, the humans that did survive the original radiation poisoning, and did reproduce, developed genetic abnormalities; pale and sometimes crystal-looking skin, unusual body temperatures, enhanced senses and strength. We began our own very convenient rumor when these mutations were being discovered -- the inability to age. Of course, that was all a farce. Vampires (and a few select shape-shifters) were still the only immortals to walk the planet. But this meant we no longer had to hide, no longer had to move. We could finally have a home.

Our family became known widely as the Olympic Coven, and although it was a future I once hoped would never come true, we became the ones who oversaw our world.

If there was anything I've learned, it was that our story had been written long before a very ordinary young girl named Isabella Swan met her soul mate, Edward Cullen. Nothing we endured happened by chance, but by fate. We had one path, and it would have never ended any other way.

Forks, Washington still stands. It's here where we'll live out an eternity together, in the place it all began, over two hundred years ago...

_...and they lived happily ever after. Forever..._

**Author's Note:**

The most difficult part of letting go of the Cullen family is there is never an ending for them, and as fans, we want to follow their story forever. So I just picked a moment in their existence to end it, as broad as I may have left it.

They would still have their trials and tribulations, of course. Bella and Jake would have to live through the death of their families and friends. They would all endure the war and devastation humans created. But the important thing is that we know they have a future--or in their case, an eternity. If you didn't quite get it, Bella's prologue and epilogue were told from the future, the year being approximately 2210--my last attempt to prove their happily ever after.

When I wrote this epilogue it was way back during the first few chapters. I always knew how I would end it. I knew Bella had to tell you, because after all, this was her story all along. I knew that the little boy Bella saw in her dreams had to one day come true, even if he wasn't exactly how she had seen him.

And most importantly, I knew they had to end up in Forks, in the huge white house at the end of the winding road lined with trees which Alice enjoyed stringing with lights. I knew Bella and Edward had to have their perfect cottage back--lavender stones and all. I knew their meadow had to be close by. I knew Jacob had to take his rightful and now permanent place as Alpha, and Chief of the Quileutes. It was the only place they ever belonged. So, for decades, centuries, and eventually millenniums, that's where they'll be. I hope other people will be happy with them there as well.

I will probably write one-shots whenever the mood strikes me, but thanks to my reviewers I am going to begin to write my own novel. I've always wanted to be an author, so I'm going to dive right in. I thank all of the readers for that.

So this is goodbye to my life after the saga, I hope you all enjoyed the ride as much as I did.

Regards,

Amanda Beth


End file.
